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Tweak says, "are you still accepting"

Castiel (entrenchedwings) wrote in we_coexist,
@ 2015-01-26 21:17:00

Entry tags:

castiel, jesse custer, zz:status complete

Another Angel in a Trenchcoat (Jesse)
Castiel had spent a while alone after meeting Baba. He had decided he didn't like her, he didn't like how her words stuck in his mind. Creatures who knew how to make words stick tended to like to mess with people, and Castiel was tired of those types of games.

At least she didn't seem to be a rampaging evil, though. She obviously had her own designs, and Castiel was pretty sure he wouldn't like some of them, but without any signs of active evil-doing, Cas preferred to avoid her for now.

Coming back to the habited City the angel walked around for a while, and eventually found himself drawn into a dingy little bar that most might have walked by without even seeing. Perhaps the attraction was that it reminded him of a place where Sam and Dean would end up, and he was still somewhat optomistic he'd find the bothers here somewhere.

He walked in, and almost instantly felt the presense of something else. Something very powerful. His eyes instantly found a being contained in a vessel at the bar, and walked forward almost shakily towards him. Under his shirt the pendant he'd borrowed from Dean, all but forgotten, suddenly started to burn white hot, and a few feet away from the human body Castiel finally tore his eyes off the other being and looked down, swiping over the jewelry with his hand. The burn was mended and the pendant's magic was shielded, and the angel took a deep breath. He was terrified of what he was sensing, and seeing, but he felt like some external force pushed the air out of his vessel's lungs.

"Father." The word was uttered softly, and with no shortage of respect, or humility. And all at once Castiel found himself at a loss as to what to say or do.

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cowboy_god
2015-02-10 03:14 am UTC (link)

"I should hope so." Jesse said about the drink. It was old enough and expensive enough that it should get a regular person shitfaced after just a few glasses. Between himself and Castiel, they might go through the whole bottle. And that was if Cas knew how to let the alcohol effect him.

"For here, no. It ain't strange for her. I actually haven't experienced anything I'd call strange for her." Jesse paused. "No, that ain't true. There was a time when nothin moved, when nothin was provided, that was fuckin weird."

He understood what Castiel was talking about. "I think everyone prefers it to that. Yer here now, kiddo. Try and find where ya fit. Also try to have a bit of fun, if ya can."

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entrenchedwings
2015-02-10 05:39 am UTC (link)

Castiel merely grunted at the thought, and the language. It was course and gruff. He was never certain how he'd picture God's voice, but he sounded a great deal more like Dean than Cas could have imagined.

"Where I fit?" Castiel repeated blankly. Fun? He stared at the other for a long moment, then shook his head. "No. I don't think so. I'm tired of being a pawn in other's games. I'm tired of looking for what my job is supposed to be. The being in charge here will tell me what it wants, or it can bite me." The last part came out harsher than he'd meant to, and was evidence of the Dean and other hunter-like personalities he'd been spending time with. And possibly how the alcohol was seeping in.

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cowboy_god
2015-02-17 01:32 am UTC (link)

Jesse couldn't help but smile. Maybe he didn't realize it, but Castiel was already finding himself. The cowboy could tell that just by the way the angel spoke.

"The being in charge here don't know what it wants, Cas. It ain't gonna be a good leader for ya. And don't you go givin it ideas on what it can do, ya just might find yerself with teethmarks on yer buttcheeks."

He shook his head. "Yer job here is what ya want yer job t'be. You wanna help people, we'll find a way to make it happen. Ya wanna sling burgers, then you can do that. But no matter what happens, featherhead, I ain't gonna leave you alone in it."

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entrenchedwings
2015-02-17 04:12 pm UTC (link)

Castiel didn't know if it was a relief or an exasperation that another super power was spending its time aimlessly messing with weaker beings. He supposed he wouldn't like it any better if it did have a plan in place, but was it too much to ask that those creatures who could control reality show a little control over themselves and their own impulses.

He considered what was said. It was his choice what he wanted to do. And he wouldn't be alone regardless. He smiled slightly at Jesse, then looked off into the distance. He thought about Peter, trying to find his girlfriend, and Beauty, and Baba. "The people here are interesting," he said. He might try to help them. He was tired of conflict, sure, and he knew that action or inaction were equally likely to help or hurt, but he didn't like standing by and allowing evil to run unchallenged. "Is that what you do, sling burgers?" It wasn't asked with judgement. After all, Castiel didn't have a better plan at the moment.

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cowboy_god
2015-02-27 06:27 pm UTC (link)

Jesse poured them out more liquor, determined to finish the bottle one way or another, and looked at the angel as the feathered one tried to figure out his new place in life.

"They are." he agreed. "There's all kinds here to get t'meet and talk to, Cas. People from places you ain't never heard of. The ones who are born here in the City ain't really all right, they ain't... they feel manufactured. Like how you can get a really nice leather jacket in a store, but ya know that everyone on the planet could be wearin the same thing, or you could go to a vintage shop and find one that's singular. We're used to the last, with the people we deal with. The ones born here, they're like the first."

Jesse laughed. "Nah, I don't sling burgers. I used to be a preacher here, guess I still am in some capacity. Mostly I just try to help others where I can. Keep my friends safe. I try not to interfere with most stuff, life has to have a balance, after all. Can't have everything be good all the time. But ya can't have it be bad, neither. So if that balance starts to get out of whack, I'll step in. Usually I wait to be asked though, so I can be sure that people want my help."

He fished his cigarettes out of his pocket, sliding one from the pack. He offered one to the angel as well, with a nudge of his finger to slide the box across the bar. Jesse didn't adhere to the rules of not smoking places.

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entrenchedwings
2015-03-01 09:58 am UTC (link)

"There were many like that in the dead world," Cas nodded, frowning and thinking. "The natives there were... similar." It was repetitive, but he found he lacked the ability to describe it. They were people, and each lived his or her own life. But they felt more like ants in a hive than humans in a city. There was no true individuality in the general populace.

He blinked at the description of how the other spent his time in the City, and absently took the cigarette box, extracting one and sticking it in his mouth, letting it dangle off the corner of his lip as if he'd smoked a thousand times. He couldn't remember ever trying a cigarette, though. Maybe it was something Jimmy used to do.

"So you gave yourself to this place, and help the people here," he said, trying and failing first to keep the bitter note out of his voice, and then to not hate himself for it. He didn't know why God had abandoned his world, and apparently the next he'd been to, and was now here actively not affecting another being's world. But he wasn't sure after everything he'd seen that he blamed his creator for abandoning his previous projects, either.

"Do you know if Sam or Dean made it to this world?" he asked finally, softly. He turned to meet Jesse's eyes fully for the first time, praying the other understood his need for a direct answer. It wasn't the first time he'd made the plea, but it was the first time he was speaking directly to his creator, instead of pleading to the Heavens hoping God was taking voicemail.

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cowboy_god
2015-03-02 01:00 am UTC (link)

Jesse nodded. He wasn't surprised that Cas was irritated. The angel had every right to be. In Jesse's world, God had vanished as well. He had left when Genesis had been born, and then Genesis had broken free and Jesse had learned all. The whole story was so intensely strange and complicated, Jesse knew the only way to explain it would be to show Castiel - again - through touch. Now did not seem like that moment, however. The angel was adjusting to other things.

"I do my best to, anyway." He lit their cigarettes with an easy flick of his zippo. He knew that there were times when maybe he should have helped, but didn't. Times when he could have stepped in to make things easier.

"They used to be here." Jesse said. "I worked with 'em a lot. Doesn't seem like they're here now, though. Don't mean they won't be eventually. Just ain't currently."

And he couldn't promise it would be versions of the boys that either of them knew already. Jesse hated that about the City.

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entrenchedwings
2015-03-07 03:57 am UTC (link)

Castiel looked over at Jesse sharply at his words, and stared at him for a long moment. The angel had no idea what to think, his mind was racing in several directions at he stared at the only embodiment of his creator he'd ever spoken to, let alone seen.

After a moment he let out a long breath, not registering that he'd needed it. Inadvertantly he inhaled a great deal of cigarette smoke, but although it burned recognizeably in his chest, he exhaled with control. It almost felt good.

He nodded. "I wouldn't try to pull them here," he said. If they weren't here they may be home, if home still existed. He looked at the cigarette thoughtfully, then shook his head, suddenly smirking slightly. "I don't imagine introducing them into the plans here would go over any better than they did on earth." The brothers had an amazing knack for messing with beings infinitly more powerful themselves, and succeeding.

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cowboy_god
2015-03-08 03:25 am UTC (link)

Jesse smiled and shook his head. "Don't get me wrong, friend. I ain't pullin nobody here. Ain't my job." He paused, the hand holding the glass tilting a bit. "Well. I done it once, t'prove a point, but I sent 'em right back to where he came from. Needed to make a big splash and it was the easiest way."

He shook his head again. "But no, featherhead. I ain't bringin neither of the Winchester boys here. City does that. Don't need two of us bein assholes. I like those boys, they're good ones. They work hard and they protect the ones they love. Little unorthodox in some of their ways, but I like that. I ain't never been the sort to play by the rules, neither."

Jesse swallowed the rest of his whiskey and poured more.

"City wants em, though, Cas, it's gonna bring em. Please don't fault me if that happens."

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entrenchedwings
2015-03-09 09:58 pm UTC (link)

Castiel hadn't assumed his father had been adding to the City numbers, though he quietly filed away that the being had the ability. He had learned to keep track of any information he came across, since the Winchesters had taught him very well that you never knew what you'd need to know or be able to use later. Not that he had any plans on doing anything later, but prepared was always best.

He gave Jesse a long look at the request, and then shook his head, having another drag from the cigarette before taking it out to tap the ash.

"I had a great deal of time to be angry with you in the dead world," he said, looking at the glass of alcohol. "There's no point in it, it never helps resolve anything. And I never know if it's part of somebody else's game." Castiel was sick of being manipulated, sick of being expected to do things that were meant to be unintentional. He was sick of his plans and hopes falling to pieces, and hearing somebody stronger and more etheral than himself boast that it had always been intended to come out that way. He wanted to be told what was good, and what to do to achieve it, or he wanted to be left out of the plans altogether.

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cowboy_god
2015-03-11 01:37 am UTC (link)

"The only one that plays games here, Castiel, is the City itself." Jesse shook his head, taking a long drag off of the cigarette and following it with a drink of whiskey. "Your life is your own here, I don't aim to use you for ... well... anything, honestly. I'd like t'be yer friend, which might seem like a lot to ask of ya, but it's the honest truth."

He looked at the angel, wanting to say more, but unable to form the words in the right way that wouldn't sound overly cheesy or fake. Jesse already felt like he was pushing the boundaries of fake.

"Like I said, I'm here for ya. Ya need somethin, you just ask."

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entrenchedwings
2015-03-16 09:43 pm UTC (link)

Castiel looked at his father as he spoke, and though conflicted feelings rose up in responce to the words, the overwhelming emotion was peace. He'd searched for this being for so long, to hear the words didn't sound fake, but confirming. He'd learned enough not to trust in God completely, but it was enough to know he hadn't been wrong about his creator's intentions, which seemed genuine.

"Whether or not the choice was mine, I would chose to be at your side," he responded simply, facing the other. Then he turned back to his drink. "I would fight to make the choice mine."

He still loved the world his father had created, and had never lost the love for the being, but he had tasted self reliance and independant thought, and treasured them. Experience taught him his will may not always be his own, and most of the time he longed for direction, but it was no longer a blind faith. His own values and priorities had developed, and though he didn't doubt Jesse could overpower him at will, or that other beings existed who could do the same. But if he'd learned anything from his time among the humans, it was the importance of fighting to keep control of oneself. And he'd learned that whatever he'd gone through, he cherished his father's creations more than anything. And how could he not still feel loyalty and love for the being that created it, not to mention himself?

"It would be an honor to be your friend. To stand at your side," he said finally, choosing his words carefully. "Though I believe I've been changed. I'm no longer what you created me to be."

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cowboy_god
2015-03-17 12:31 am UTC (link)

Jesse smiled. He liked hearing that, that Cas wanted to be at his side, willingly. Chose it, even. Would fight to make sure he could have that choice.

Then he laughed. A good natured, happy thing. He patted Castiel on the back and couldn't stop grinning. Changed. That was wonderful.

"Well thank the fuckin stars above fer that." He turned slightly to lean on the bar and watch the angel. "There's some things in this world that ya hope don't never change, like the way steak tastes, and yer favorite beer - cause changin the recipe on that shit's a real mindfuck. But livin things, people, angels, hell, even dogs, they gotta change. They can't always stay the same, it ain't how the world works. Gotta be able to bend when the storms blow, or you'll break. Ya learn shit, you apply that learned shit to yer life, it changes ya."

Jesse patted Cas on the shoulder again before turning back to his drink. "Wouldn't have it any other way, featherhead."

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entrenchedwings
2015-03-18 05:18 am UTC (link)

Castiel listened carefully, and then, finally, smiled.

With the last endearment he picked up and finished his drink, then chuckled, lowly. Having God's approval was truly a gift, even if he'd thought he'd been done with his creator for some time.

Jesse was completely unexpected, but he supposed he was naive to have thought he'd know how God sounded. He'd always pictured a being similar to Michael, without the chip on his shoulder. Jesse, though, reminded him strongly of Dean, and he appreciated that. He wondered if it was truly a power trip that had sent the angels out of control when God left, or if it was simply reaction of grief to losing such a presence and voice.

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