InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I just had a Twinkie for lunch"

John Watson internationally smuggles tea (imhisblogger) wrote in wariscoming,
@ 2014-09-11 00:30:00

Entry tags:

john watson, mary watson

Who:John and Mary
What:Things
When:backdated to John's birthday
Where:Mary's flat
Warnings:TBA

John had to admit he was curious as to what Mary had in store. The woman was interesting to say the least. He didn't quite know how to act around her all the time, but she always seemed to know why or how to respond when he needed her to say something. Even if it was something he didn't always want to hear. On his way over he finally decided to make a stop by Sherlock's grave. This time however he didn't allow it to ruin his day. It was a simple act of paying respects to his dear friend. The one who actually had passed away.

..That still enraged him. He touched the head stone after spending a good half hour there. He didn't really understand what the hell Sherlock could have been thinking back home, deceiving him like that. Apparently everyone else but him had known the man was alive. Or so it seemed. John walked away before his mood soured, and before the moment was over. He really had just come to see him. It was still sobering. While it didn't anger him or break him as it used to, it was still his friend. He still owed him to visit now and then, and he really hadn't. He knew Sherlock would say it was stupid, that there was nothing to even visit. It was just a corpse, and his scientific brain didn't allow him to believe anything beyond body in the ground existed John couldn't help but do it every year.

The visits had come to that. Every year now instead of every few months or every week. He was moving on with his life quite well thank you. Even had a job, small group of friends and family, and in spite of his sore wrist he was almost content. Except in one area.

He still hadn't deemed himself worthy of love. He still remained closed off in that regard. Those who loved him got hurt. Or left. That thought still often played on his mind.

And yet..Mary still spoke to him even knowing all that he'd been through, and those around him had suffered. So he made the long walk to her flat and rang the ringer. Waiting for the woman to answer.

(Post a new comment)

notmypast
2014-09-13 02:14 am UTC (link)

She'd made up her mind. John Watson was meant to be hers. History proved it. Literature proved it. She was going to get her man back, whatever it took. Sherlock may have thought it was long overdue, but it was terrifying. If, after everything, he still didn't want her? Or if he could never love her? What would that mean for her? She'd considered moving on. But frankly, she didn't want to. They weren't Molly and Tom. She loved John for him, and not as any sort of replacement. She loved him as him and for everything he was. Even here, where he'd faced a world of things she could only imagine, she still loved him intensely. And she just desperately hoped he'd find it in him to love her someday, too.

For his birthday, she'd bought a watch. Something nice and weatherproof and easy to get on and off for surgery days. He also had a new plaque with his name for his office. And she'd made a similar card for him that she had for Bo. Using craft paint, she'd let Ava play in the paint colors and splash around and smear and create. Then she'd written over the top. The hafd part had been deciding what to write. Did she make it out to 'Daddy'? Or leave it? It shouldn't have been so complicated but somehow, with him, it always was. Which wasn't fair. Ava was getting older every day. One day she'd pick up on who was importantant in her life. Would he be one of them?

The knock on the door jarred her out of her thoughts. Grabbing the baby monitor from the side table, she made her way from the couch to the door. She knew who to expect and just opened it. "You're a bit later than I expected," she admitted. "Come on in, I have your gifts on the kitchen table."

(Reply to this) (Thread)

imhisblogger
2014-09-13 07:00 pm UTC (link)

Love was a dangerous thing to him. It often ended in pain, one sidedness and sadness. And in the end, abandonment. He also didn't feel he deserved it. He couldn't exactly place it into words as to why, but everything that had happened here in Kansas had lead up to those feelings.

Even a simple act like celebrating a birthday was uncomfortable for him. He didn't see himself as worth celebration. He'd done some terrible things and lost many friends to those things. Why should he be happy when they possibly were not? And yet Mary insisted. And Florence, and the small group of friends he did maintain hadn't let him just forget. They didn't let it pass him by and he didn't know what to say to them just yet.

"Sorry. Must have lost track of time on the way home." He didn't realize how much of it he'd spent at Sherlock's. He was tired. When people asked him often if he was happy he could truly only give them a half answer. Happiness wasn't a thing he felt for very long. There were moments, sure. But then he'd retire to his own empty bedroom and it would ebb away, leaving him alone once more. Smiles only partially reached his eyes as he gave her one. "You didn't need to go out of your way for me.." He said quietly as he made his way inside to sit at the table in front of it, after a good while finally tugging at the paper as curiosity gave way.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

notmypast
2014-09-15 06:33 am UTC (link)

Mary knew him well. Better than he liked, probably. She knew so much about him. From the way his hand only gave about 24 hours notice before it started acting up to his guilty pleasure favorite movies. She didn't want to pry, but she knew those eyes. Haunted, some would say. But that was all right. Long ago she'd known she couldn't compete with the ghost of Sherlock Holmes. So she didn't try. Instead she'd accepted him as a sometimes unwelcome and sometimes not third wheel in her relationship. It was support John needed, not criticism.

"I know I didn't need to, John. I wanted to. It isn't much, just something I thought you might need." Without asking, she poured him a cup of tea from the kettle on the stove and prepared it exactly as he took it. Cream, no sugar. "I'm sorry I don't have cake. I do have some of the cookies I made for Bo left, if you'd be up for birthday cookies instead?"

She leaned against the kitchen counter, sipping her own tea and watching him. He'd never know how beautiful he was to her. Or how badly it broke her heart that he still mostly looked at her and saw a stranger. But she'd fix it. Given a bit of time, he'd see her as her and not the strange woman who'd somehow come into his life.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

imhisblogger
2014-09-16 09:56 pm UTC (link)

He didn't know if it was because he was predictable or she just knew the other version him so well that he felt so comfortable with her. At first it was odd, but now sitting in that small kitchen it felt almost normal. She didn't try to force him to change in spite of not being the man she knew from home, she just accepted him as he was. Flaws and all. Not many would have the patience, he'd discovered this over the years of being in Kansas. The other John was a lucky man to have found someone so loving.

That was the one thing he'd yet to find. Love wasn't an easy thing to come by when he'd allowed Sherlock into his life. Not many would bother trying, and yet there she was. Offering him birthday presents and tea. The fact that she'd remembered said birthday was more than enough for him. Yet she couldn't be his. She had a husband already. Which was weird and confusing considering it was him. Not him. Future him?

He gave her a slightly exasperated smile as he finally caved in and pulled the small box open. Taking the watch out of the box he actually smiled more genuinely this time. "It's enough. More than that really, it's perfect. Thank you."He stood to hug her. He wasn't the most affectionate person, he knew that but hugging her that way almost made him wish it was different. If there was hope for that John, maybe there would be hope for him. "Actually just threw mine away, you have good timing. It kept horrible time."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

notmypast
2014-09-18 03:10 am UTC (link)

Mary accepted the hug, forcing herself not to let it linger. Where he wasn't known for being affectionate, she was. Especially when it came to him and it killed her that she couldn't be. Not then, not with him. She desperately wanted to just cling to him, to feel that familiar warmth and wrap herself in his scent, still so similar even though she was almost certain this John wore a different fragrance than he did back home.

Instead she briefly returned the hug and pulled away. She bit her lip with a grin. "Perfect timing? Watch puns not intended?" Her voice was teasing and her eyes lit up. It didn't matter what dimension they were in. Teasing John never got old. "It's a similar style to your old one. I hope you like it." She knew his taste but styles evolved. Maybe he wouldn't. Or hell, maybe he would hate it simply because it came from her.

"Ava made you a card, too. Well. I made a card and let Ava play in the paint. But close enough." She handed him the blue and green streaked card from the table with a grin. Despite herself, she was glad she'd gone with a standard 'Happy birthday'. Less complicated than any implications of fatherhood.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

imhisblogger
2014-09-18 08:13 am UTC (link)

For a moment the expression he gave her was terribly serious, but then the corners of his lips quirked into a smirk as she caught his puns. Sherlock probably wouldn't have even reacted or cred, nor would the people he worked with. John was a fan of puns however. His sense of humor wasn't very obvious to most, but it was there subtly if one looked hard enough. It tended to be more on the dry and sarcastic side.

"It's perfect." He commented as he put it on to try it out. It fit him quite well. She even knew what size to pick up and he barely knew anything about her. He felt a little bad. He'd spent so much time trying to avoid her and unsure how to react to her, he was aware now he'd missed out. He hoped she was't too turned off. The present was a good indicator that she didn't despise him for it at least. He hoped. He was rather bad at reading signals.

"It counts." He couldn't help but be amused at the gesture. "I'll have to thank her too." He was bad with children, but he'd been getting a little better between Bo and Ava. A little less stiff with them.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

notmypast
2014-09-19 10:49 pm UTC (link)

She shouldn't have allowed it, but John's praise filled her with a warm pleased sensation. Choosing gifts for him had always been something she enjoyed. He deserved wonderful things and he seemed to refuse to allow himself to have them. Here, though, it was more difficult. Something too personal and she might scare him off. Something too impersonal and he'd have no idea she was interested. It seemed she'd done well, though, and she took a seat at the table to finish her tea.

"She went down for her nap about an hour ago. There's a chance she'll be up in time to say hello before you leave." Depending on how long he stayed. She wanted to invite him to dinner but she knew Florence had planned something. She was considering attending if she could get the baby ready in time. "Prettysure she's missed you. Tried to tell her you're busy being successful but she can be quite the diva." She was teasing, of course. No such conversation had happened with the infant. But if it let John know they thought of then all the better.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

imhisblogger
2014-09-25 08:12 pm UTC (link)

He wasn't so easily scared off as she might think. Though the thought of looming father hood was terrifying, the idea of family wasn't so bad and almost dulled that fear. This was his little family, they'd chosen him for some reason even considering all his flaws. He knew he had a great deal of them, but they didn't seem to care. Mary hadn't judged him or hated him when he decided he had no idea how to react to the woman, she'd simply waited him out. Now he could almost feel comfortable with her. The only one he didn't yet was Sherlock, he was growing more and more awkward around the man.

John didn't have to even fuss with his tea, she' gotten it perfect too. He sipped at it carefully so as not to burn himself and stretched his hand again. Damn thing kept tightening up on him, and he was forced to put down the cup."Did she? I didn't mean to cause her to worry." Either of them really. He hadn't meant any stress on them, but gaining a family wasn't something he was good at. It'd taken him an age to let in anyone aside from Sherlock. Now that he had of course he was quite protective of those he considered his, but he wasn't the type to move quickly with these things. "So you do talk to them?" He asked her, regarding Ava. "A woman told me at work she was having conversations with an infant." John really didn't understand children. He was trying a little though.

(Reply to this) (Parent)