Who: Stiles Stilinski and Derek Hale What: Contemplating. Where: Leaving the school and walking around town, so wherever. When: After school Monday. Status: Incomplete/Ongoing. Rating: PG for angst. Also spoilers through the end of 3A and for the trailers of 3B
Stiles was pretty sure if there was some kind of competition for the biggest douchebag award? He was in the running for it. Armand had actually sent him a message about making sure he treated Lydia well. And of course he would, because he'd loved her since he was eight years old even if no one believed someone that young knew what love was. Nothing had changed with his feelings for her except the intensity. But she'd been seeing another guy. And granted, while Lydia's previous taste in guys had been questionable -- Jackson Whitmore and Aiden the former alpha wolf who'd kept trying to kill Scott and Isaac -- Armand actually seemed like a genuinely good guy. The few times he'd been around the man, he'd liked him. He didn't get any bad I'm really a giant lizard who rips people apart or I'm working with the alpha of all alpha wolves who's trying to kill your BFF."
No, Armand seemed like a regular human guy -- a bit old fashioned, but very nice and sincere. And that made him feel even more guilty.
It's because you know you're not good enough for her, said the voice in his head.
He grimaced, looking down at his hands. Yeah, he knew that much. Obviously, as evidenced by his complete lack of social status, lack of popularity, lack of any actual life direction and...oh yeah. The fact that there was darkness gathering around his heart. Darkness that could, and probably would be dangerous. To Lydia, to Scott, to Allison. To anyone he was around. Sure, he was just a human, but humans did plenty of damage to other people every moment of every day. He didn't have to have super strength for that.
Stiles blew out a breath, pushing himself to his feet as he began to walk away from the school. He didn't really see the point to going. Not when there was an impending apocalypse. Not when this Seal was taking people back every time he turned around. Tony Stark and Felicia Hardy, two of the most powerful displaced people, were gone. Two of their hardest hitters when it came to fighting Lucifer. That just didn't bode well.
To top it all off, Allison had linked them to their show's trailers for the second half of its season. And her aunt Kate was apparently back, haunting her. He'd made the mistake of clicking on the related videos and watching his own. He was going to lose his mind. It had been vague, but that was the general premise of what he was apparently going to be facing back home. Except he didn't even have to go back home to be forced to deal with it, because Stiles knew it was coming. The violent, haunting nightmares he'd been having on the rare times he could sleep signaled that it was already starting to happen. He felt it, felt the shift within himself, felt that it was just a matter of time before the world came tumbling down completely.
He'd always been plagued with nightmares, with panic attacks. Ever since his mom died. But this wasn't the same. This was more intense. More vivid. Each time he woke up from one it took him a little longer to feel like he wasn't still trapped. It wasn't going to end well. It couldn't, could it? Would Lucifer find some way to use him against his friends because of this darkness? Use him against his family? It wouldn't be the first time the bad guy had used him to get to the people he cared about. How many times had he been the bargaining chip to get Scott to do something that someone wanted him to do?
Stiles scrubbed his hands over his face as he walked, looking a bit dazed and out of it. He had to figure something out and quickly. He didn't want to hurt anyone. Not ever. Because he couldn't live with himself if he did.