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Katherine Pierce is coming for your blood. (psychobitchvamp) wrote in wariscoming,
@ 2012-10-06 03:39:00

Entry tags:

katherine pierce, merlin

Katherine & Merlin
Friday morning, October 5, 2012; Katherine's house
All the feels. No, really. Merlin's helping Katherine feel feelings again for the first time in 5 centuries. All. the feels. EVER.
TBD/In progress

When things got tough, she took the easy way out. She couldn't do that this time.

Katherine had been in a battle with herself for the last month and change. Between the promises from Caedus and the talks with Jacen, she wasn't sure what she wanted to do in that respect any more. The post she'd made on the boards a month ago had spawned several conversations she hadn't anticipated. She had expected a lot more flack than she'd received that day, but it had given her a lot to think about. And the girl who had virtually no friends, had a lot of time to herself to think things over. Somewhere along the way in this redemption act, she'd managed to actually start believing her own words and she actually wanted to follow through with what she was setting out for herself.

She hadn't expected things to hit her this way, but in part, it had been a comment Lilah had made to her that made her second-guess what she thought she was doing. How could she be sure that Caedus would follow through with what he promised her? Surely, she couldn't be that lucky, not twice in succession. Manipulation was something she was familiar with and there was always the potential for someone to try to out-manipulate her. That was not something she was okay with, nor was it a risk she was willing to take, and for what? Promises of things she'd never dreamed of. What did that even mean? That was vague, and probably for a reason. Moriarty had been specific. What she wanted, she got, at a price. A price she was willing to accept at the time for the protection with his witch and the material things he provided her with. Thinking back to when she was working for Moriarty seemed like another lifetime now. So much had changed, right under her own nose.

Her meeting with John three nights ago had been the biggest recent turning point. She was trying to help him, though she wasn't sure it had worked in the way she intended. Katherine thought that maybe he could try to find a way to push through everything if he let out the anger out on her. From what she heard from Jacen, it sounded like maybe the meeting had the opposite of the intended effect. That bothered her, though not in a guilty sense, rather more annoyed than anything else at this point. She had a fleeting thought, wondering if that might change after today.

Now that she had finally come around to realizing where she was in her own head, knowing what she wanted, Katherine was uneasy. What she was starting today was far from the easy path to take, which was hard for her because that was always what she defaulted to. When things got tough, she took the easy way out. She couldn't do that this time.

She had been up, pacing the front room of her house for an hour now, waiting for time to pass and Merlin to show up. He would be here, she had no doubt of that, time just seemed to pass slower for her today purely out of spite.

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psychobitchvamp
2012-10-06 04:48 pm UTC (link)

Katherine nodded at his words, layinng back against the mound of pillows on her bed, trying to do what little she could to relax before she began. There was still a great sense of hesitation, but slowly, she started to turn that mental dial to start letting the emotions spill through.

The first wave was almost small enough to miss, barely even enough to be considered a trickle, and she realized she was probably holding back too much still. She took a slow breath to steady herself and let a little more pour through. At first, it was warm and slow, but it quickly started to speed up and that slow warmth rapidly grew white hot. A gasp escaped her and a soft, verbal sort of wince. "Oh, God," she breathed, squeezing her eyes shut. Her body was on fire. And somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew that was only the beginning.

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ex_magi436
2012-10-06 06:43 pm UTC (link)

He was there, holding one of her hands, even as it hit her, the other hand stroking the air above her body, sending waves of warmth and comfort to her. "Hold on, Katherine. You knew this would be rough. You can do this."

He was there, and willed himself to aid her, to help her, somehow. His magic wrapped around them both, then, letting her steal a little of his strength, letting her feel, no matter how overwhelming those emotions got, that she was not alone.

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psychobitchvamp
2012-10-06 07:22 pm UTC (link)

She barely registered the feeling of his hand in her own, her mind too focused on everythiing that was hitting her in that moment. So many emotions rushing at her at once and she couldn't really make any sense of it. They were too jumbled, too tangled, all running together into a wave of emotions that crashed over her. "I don't know if I can..." she said, her voice strained by the pain that started in her head and spread like wildfire across the rest of her body.

Suddenly, the pain changed. First it was like fire, but now it was like a million knoves slicing across her body. Why did it hurt so much? She couldn't think about the reasons, though, she couldn't really think about anything. She took in a shaky breath, trying to focus on something else besides the pain, but what was there at this point?

Merlin. He was here. She could focus on him. She squeezed his hand in her own, reminding herself that she was not here alone, there was someone there with her, for her. "Talk," she said suddenly. "I don't care what you say....just words...I neeed something else to focus on."

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ex_magi436
2012-10-06 07:32 pm UTC (link)

"Very well. Listen then, to a story of my foolishness, from not long before I came here. My story begins as most do, in a time of quiet..."

And he began to tell her of his encounter with a dragon, in all the detail. It took some time to tell, but his voice was calm and warm as he told it, enhancing the dangerous parts, growing quiet and then loud again, attempting to draw her into the story of his folly and his success, if only barely.

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psychobitchvamp
2012-10-06 09:41 pm UTC (link)

She nodded, glad he had something to fill the time with, something else for her to focus on. Her attention somehow split, the part of her that was previously focused on the pain now on his words, but enough attention was still being paid to the task at hand that she didn't lose grip on it either.

After awhile, she almost forgot there was any pain at all. She just went numb. Everything hitting her at once eventually just seemed to drown itself out. She squeezed Merlin's hand again, almost as if to make sure he was still there, or perhaps to make she was still there, at this point, she wasn't sure.

Compared to the pain, the numbness was better. It wasn't pain, it wasn't pleasure, it just was. And she kind of like that. It was a point of maintaining, but it was not over. It was far from over. She just had to prepare herself for starting the pain again, letting more emotion pour through her body again. That was hard to do, to give herself the pain, and she was back to that hesitation once again.

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	ex_magi436 2012-10-07 04:53 pm UTC (link)
	He squeezed her hand in turn, holding it, letting warmth flow from his hand to hers. "Hold on, Katherine, you can do this." He gently stroked her brow, making sure, along the way, she was not feverish. "How are you feeling?" He was worried, and unwilling to let her face this alone, or even truly silently. he would stay this course, whatever it took. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

psychobitchvamp
2012-10-07 10:58 pm UTC (link)

She didn't know what it was about that feeling he sent through her, but it calmed her every time, and she let out a breath before she answered him to make sure her voice would be steady. "Numb." she said honestly. "I...I don't want to start it again," she said quietly, the fear evident in her voice. Fear of the emotions, fear of the pain. She didn't want any more of it.

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	Sorry! Life swallowed me!! ex_magi436 2012-10-10 03:34 am UTC (link)
	"I know, but you need to, Katherine. Or else fear will rule you. You must not let it. If you mean to be free of it, then you must keep pushing. It will be hard, but you will not be alone." he squeezed her hand, and gently stroked her hair again. "I will not leave, nor let you face this alone." He nodded, smiling softly. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

no worries hon! <3

psychobitchvamp
2012-10-10 03:57 am UTC (link)

She knew he was right, somewhere beneath the fear where her logic was buried right now, she knew she had to keep going, but that didn't make her want to do it any more. She had to find something, though. She had come this far, she could push through the rest....right?

"You're right," she said finally, running her free hand through her hair, laying back into the pillows behind her as she started pushing through more emotions. This time, they were accompanied by memories, memories long forgotten and locked away, awful things no one would have wanted to remember if choosing to forget was an option.

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ex_magi436
2012-10-10 04:15 am UTC (link)

As she faced it again, his magic once more flared and he stroked his hands above her body, inches away from touch, letting his magic and presence touch her, so she would know, even in her deepest places, that she was not alone. Merlin knew that body, mind, and heart all worked together, so that by giving her sensation and warmth in one, he could help influence the others.

And so he watched over her.

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