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Tweak says, "Wait for moonrise."

Emma Swan finally found her fairytale (lostfairytale) wrote in wariscoming,
@ 2012-06-13 01:12:00

Entry tags:

emma swan, jim moriarty

Who: Jim Moriarty and Emma Swan
What: Discussions on a word the Consulting Criminal and the Abandoned Princess can't seem to see
When: Sometime after this but before this.
Where: The Moriarty-Swan house. You read that right.
Warnings: God, it's these two. Don't read on an empty stomach. Or with small children around.

Emma was exhausted. But she kept going. Though she considered her ridiculous and kind of stupid, Romana did have a point. They really weren't that different, the two of them. One day, Emma would be in the same place. One day, she'd have to decide between the people of Lawrence and the man who'd offered her the world. It was a choice she wasn't looking forward to. And so she continued taking each day at a time, swearing to herself over and over that she could get him to change. Oh, he'd never be a model citizen. She might not make the best choices, but she wasn't stupid. Jim Moriarty would never be what anyone would call a 'nice guy'. But maybe, just maybe, she could prevent the muderer in him.

Just in case, though... Just in case, she threw herself into helping with the plastic issue. First to help Jo find Chuck, and then simply to help. She'd done all the research she could, she'd given Claudia as many clues and tips as her non-sci-fi-loving, non-technological self could. She could hack a computer, but that was about it.

Well. She hadn't exactly been the most law abiding citizen growing up, either.

Jim either wasn't home when she first got there or else she couldn't find him. And calling the huge place 'home' was difficult for her, still. She'd been staying with him more or less constantly since Pestilence had landed her in a pathetic pile of pain. But officially moving in? That was a big step, one she hadn't made with anyone in a very long time, unless Mary Margaret counted. And in this scenario, she didn't think she did. But Jim's staff knew her, they actually liked her, and that was just...strange. But not entirely a bad strange. They took care of her, even if they did find it weird that she still attempted to clean up after herself or cook her own breakfast.

Knowing she had some extra time, she hopped in the shower to try and rid herself of the smell of kerosene, melting plastic, and that weird lingering barbeque smell. She found she didn't feel vulnerable, though, when she entered the living room with damp hair and a tank top and jogging pants. If Jim did feel...well, that way, about her, he would no matter what she wore. Maybe it wasn't the attire of a fairytale princess, but it was Emma Swan and he'd have to live with it. She wasn't her mother. He'd learned that quickly enough. If he wanted the true fairytale, he'd found the wrong woman.

But he'd claimed to want to give her a fairytale of her own. Her own story. So maybe, just maybe, this hardly put together, smart mouthed, afraid to drop certain words in anyone's ears girl was fine with him.

She curled up on the couch with her knees tucked beneath her, ignoring the television and a book lying about in favor of silence. Silence was definitely preferred. Gave her time to think about what the hell she'd gotten herself into.

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sooochangeable
2012-06-22 08:14 pm UTC (link)

She didn't care what happened to Sherlock. But he did. Of course he did and his fairytale knew that all too well, didn't she. And he didn't care what it took to get them there or who he had to hurt along the way but Sherlock Holmes would have his fall. There was no disputing that. There never would be. And of course people would try to stop him. Or come after them if he did manage to do it. But it was all part of the plan. It all played into what was to come. Because there was nothing they could do to stop it. All puppets in the grand scheme of things. Weak little puppets.

Not her though. He wouldn't be with her if she was weak. Oh she was malleable in a lot of ways. He could give her what she wanted, what she'd always needed. Someone to be there for her. Someone to love her. Someone that would tear apart heaven and hell to keep her safe. Protected. She didn't like being the girl in the glass cage. That's what she said. But she did. She liked it even if she wouldn't quite admit it to herself yet. And he wasn't going to tell her any different.

"You get time with me whenever you want it darling? You know how it works." But oh, no interruptions. And it was true. It was just the two of them and he suspected Emma liked it that way. That and he liked when she said home. And she was being oh so delightfully minxy at him, which he had to admit he was fond of. "You are aren't you? All mine." His eyes seemed to light up at the concept. He liked things being his. He liked possessions, he was always so fascinated by the whole idea of someone that was just for him. He'd finally gone and gotten a live in one. And they were just so interesting.

"Well then dinner can wait can't it?" he said, pulling her toward him forcefully. "Dinner can wait until later. That's what you want isn't it fairytale?" he more told her than asked before pulling her back into a kiss.

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lostfairytale
2012-06-25 04:29 am UTC (link)

Maybe she did long for comfort. Maybe she did want to know the option of being protected was there. But she still had her mother's spark, that fire that refused to be put out by anyone, no man and no authority figure. Oh, she'd turn to him if she needed him. But at his side. She refused to be locked away. If that was the case, she'd have sat back in the comfort of his home, their home, and allowed the rest of the community of displaced people to do the hard work in ending the autons. She'd done a good deal of the research, they couldn't say she hadn't helped. But her independent streak insisted she go out there and be physically involved. Because she could. Because she was damn good with a gun and pretty damn good with a punch and why shouldn't she? She'd done the work, why should they all benefit without her?

She didn't want to be just a possession, but he knew that. And he indulged her, if nothing else. Oh, he enjoyed having her. That was obvious. In the dominating way he held her to the gleam in his eyes when he looked at her. She liked that gleam. She liked knowing she'd caused it. And okay, while she'd always preferred to be in charge of the few relationships she'd had, she couldn't deny enjoying those moments where he took complete control.

She let him pull her closer, meeting his eyes deeply. Not breaking contact, she slipped a leg over his lap, straddling him in order to take his face in her hands. "Who said I didn't want dinner?" she taunted, her voice low and rough, as minxy as he wanted her to be. "I'd have to get changed, though. Can't possibly go out in this. How could you even be seen with me?"

And she knew he liked that part, at least a little. Emma wasn't shy about that. She knew she was good looking enough. Maybe even pretty. Dressed up, she made good arm candy. And made him look just that much better. They had the potential to be a power couple. They had been in that future. Everyone looked up to them.

Everyone in crime, anyway. And that wasn't how she wanted it. That wasn't how it was going to be. It couldn't.

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sooochangeable
2012-06-27 11:55 pm UTC (link)

Oh he did. He liked that he had his very own fairytale, and how good she looked on his arm when he took her out to the city. She truly was beautiful, but she was strong besides, and willful. And he wondered sometimes if he'd have her any other way. And she wanted him enough that she overlooked the crime, she'd even accepted that sometimes there needed to be other women, ones he'd wine and dine to make them do what he needed. Oh she'd drawn her line in the sand on that regard and he'd even held to it so far, planning just not to tell her if he crossed it. But he shouldn't need to, and he didn't want to, but needs must and all that.

But him and her really could be the best this town had ever seen, and he didn't know if she really knew that yet. Did she know that the life they'd seen was within their reach, that they could have that if they wanted? That they could live like Kings and be feared by everyone. But she didn't want it even if she did realize. She wanted that little girl, but not in the way they'd had her. Aurora had been adorable though, so full of potential.

"You can get changed." he told her, "Get all dressed up if you like but you know how much I like being seen with you. It's fun watching people react, isn't it darling." he added, pulling her into a kiss that very plainly told her just what he wanted to do with the evening. "We can go out. But the dinner will keep if I say it will, I mean, who would dare question me if I say hold off another night." If they went out, he'd be all business, oh Emma and the...whatever her name was, wife, wouldn't get involved in the talks. He was fairly sure the wife didn't know just how far in her husband was, she didn't need to. But then the wheels would start turning, his mind would start burning with ideas and plans and it would take him some time to wind down. It always did.

He didn't ever deny he loved the power, the control he had on the organized crime in this city. It had taken him a while. He'd had to build it up all over again. But now, they didn't make a move in this town unless he said so. Unless he told them precisely what they were and weren't allowed do. He didn't do that with Emma, she wouldn't have tolerated it, and he wouldn't have liked her as much if she did. So this decision would rest with her. "It's up to you" he told her with a deceptively soft smile. "How will we spend the evening?"

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lostfairytale
2012-06-28 07:56 am UTC (link)

She would be lying if she said that being out in the city, watching people watching them, didn't give her a little thrill. It was pathetic and she knew that. But those people, criminals though they may be, they respected him. They looked up to him. And to see them seeing him with her... Well. It certainly put most of the women in the city in their places. Those who thought they stood a chance. Those who wanted to get his attention for nothing more than his money or notoriety. If only she could deal with his little vampire friend, she'd be set.

But Emma didn't always want to be out in public, showing off. Him being out often led to too many things. Conversations she didn't want to overhear or news stories she wished she didn't know about. Keeping him in had multiple benefits. She couldn't always pull it off. Seducing him wasn't exactly difficult, but it only worked so often. But every time she could keep just one more person alive, one more attacker from getting their orders... Well. Why shouldn't she? And she got her man in the end, so why not?

It was good that he knew, though. That he understood that he couldn't control her. Much as she'd never try to force him. He knew where she stood and what she wanted. They both had a mutual understanding, though, that things could only go as far as the other wanted. She knew that in his heart he so badly wanted her to swallow down the insecurities and the fears and officially take her place at his side. To become that woman he had seen, the one willing to take a man down with a single shot. And she could. Oh, Emma could. She was skilled and talented, and it was sometimes easy for her to see how that other version of her had embraced her darker side. But she'd fought it off for so long, how could she even consider it now?

That smile, though... Deceptive, yes, but not lost on her. Because she read people. Not as well as his precious Sherlock, no, but she knew signs. And she knew how wicked that smile could actually be. And she knew she'd won, at least this evening.

"What's so great about food anyway?" she murmured, meeting his lips again. Her hands drifted slightly, loosening his tie and finding the top button of his shirt so they could make their way to his skin. It shouldn't have been so easy. If he weren't so damned good to her, she could have walked away. But it wasn't that simple. And yes, it had lost her the respect of most people in the city. But... "I love you," she whispered against his mouth, then pulled back, surprise in her eyes.

She hadn't meant to say that. Not really. Oh, they'd been dancing around it for quite some time. But to actually hear those words, out in the open? Impossible to pull back, impossible to delete or backspace? And there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it.

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sooochangeable
2012-07-03 06:32 pm UTC (link)

He had been enjoying the whole night. Having her all over him, putting off his business so he could keep his fairytale happy. All things he was willing to do, knowing full well how much she hated what he did. Hated the things he had to do. Oh she accepted it in him but she hadn't crossed that line with him yet, and he didn't know if she ever would. Seeing that possible future had bothered her more than she'd let on even to him, but he could see it. He could read her in those moments when she didn't think he was paying attention. He was always paying attention, if she didn't know that yet then who knew what would come of it. He didn't expect what she said though, of all the things he could have said back it all went from his head. And she was there, teasing him, draped over him and he couldn't pull away. Couldn't run from that damn word.

It meant a lot to her to have said it. But hearing her say it, he didn't quite know what to make of it. Or more to the point what he could possibly say back. Did he love her? Could he love anyone. It was such a ridiculous concept in so many ways. But then again, there she was, ready to say it and sitting where she was he wasn't above saying it back but he supposed it really was the kind of thing one should mean. Now there was the big question. He could say it sure, but could he mean it.

He blinked. Just once and raised his hand to her face, cupping it around her cheek. "Say that again?" he asked her, eyes dark and focused on her as ever. "Tell me you love me, knowing who I am, what I do. Knowing that it won't stop. Knowing that they'll hate me and start to hate you. Because you're here with me. Do you understand?" He kissed her again, still keeping his eyes on her and spoke, slowly, the same danger in his voice that many feared but Emma had begun to understand. "Say that again?"

If she answered well then there was that. There was more to it than just words and then he could think about what to tell her back. Because right now he couldn't think. Couldn't focus and it wasn't a feeling he liked one bit. He didn't know his next move. Is that what love was, blind stumbles in the dark with no real right or wrong answer. It was nothing he could plan for.

The things this woman did to him. How had he let her get to his heart this much. Well, suppose it was proof he had one.

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lostfairytale
2012-07-03 08:23 pm UTC (link)

If he thought he was shocked by what she'd said, he had nothing on her. Emma hadn't planned on it. Though she'd known there was a chance, she knew how she felt, she hadn't been ready. Not yet. She'd honestly never said that to anyone. Most kids could at least say they'd said it to their parents, to a loving mom or dad. Or a sibling, maybe. Even a pet. Emma hadn't had those chances. She'd never even said it to Henry, knowing from the beginning she was going to give him up. Easier to not get attached if she pretended she didn't give a damn about the tiny life growing inside of her.

But now she had. Now she'd said it and the words were out there and there wasn't a damn thing she could do except play it off and slip out and maybe lock herself in the shower for a month. Except she couldn't, because her face was in his hand and he was giving her that look. And she wasn't going anywhere. He wanted a repeat performance, apparently. Could she?

She had to. She had to be as honest with him as she'd finally been with herself. What she'd told him was only the truth. Nothing in her life was ever going to be the same again, even if she walked away now. Some people could never accept her after the choices she'd made. She may as well allow herself this, if she could. "I do," she whispered, the sound almost hesitant. But not quite. Emma couldn't hesitate once her mind was made up. "I do love you. Damn if I haven't tried not to. But I do."

Her eyes closed, finally blocking out that steady stare. She felt a little nauseous, admittedly, but at least it was said and done. If he was done with her over this... Well, she'd slap him, first of all. All the damn times he'd tried to make her say it, if he turned his back on her now, he'd deserve at least that.

"Maybe it's not the smartest thing I've ever done. But good things have come out of a lot of the stupid decisions in my life. And I have to hope the same can be said here." When she finally looked back up at him, it wasn't with fear in her eyes but resignation. Whatever happened now, there was nothing she could do about it.

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sooochangeable
2012-07-03 09:06 pm UTC (link)

Love. She loved him. It was a ridiculous messy complicated thing to do and he wasn't going to say it back, was he? It would be weakness like he'd never shown before, Did she want him to stop? She had to know the ridiculousness of that happening. This was who he was. But god help him she was in it, she'd found her way from a fun little project to someone he'd actually gone and let inside and dangerous as it was having her there. Well, she'd never hindered him in doing what he did. And she'd tried not to feel what she felt as much as he had, as much as he still did sometimes.

She repeated the words and he nodded just once, letting his hand move from its grip. "You know words like that don't get taken back. You've said it, so you're in. Long haul, no matter what, no matter how this ends, you're with me because you love me, and I let you because..."

God, how did people do this? Say this? It wasn't natural. It was dangerous, so dangerous. He said that, it made Emma a weapon to be used against him. And he knew exactly how easy it was to do. "Saying it Emma, you know what that means, for you, for me. For everything I have to do. They will come at you, they will use you. They would hurt you because it would hurt me. And if I say it, it means that any attack on you would hurt me. And its so dangerous. You have no idea how easily exploitable love is. The things people do for love darling, the things people do for this stupid, biological...thing. But I'm not just...I'm not saying this because I don't. I think I do. I think I actually love you and isn't that just weird!"

He finally looked away from her, laughing more than anything, he didn't know where to go from here. So exposed, so dammed exposed. It was the most ridiculous thing, and no, not safe. Not at all safe. "Can I just drag you to the bedroom now, fairytale, all the feelings out in the open I just need..." If he was honest, control. He just needed control back, because with words, just words, she'd managed to completely undo him. With an almost frantic desperation in the movement he wrapped his hands around her wrists and pulled her toward him to kiss her. "The things you do to me Emma Swan."

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lostfairytale
2012-07-03 09:58 pm UTC (link)

She didn't want to take them back, though. Now that she'd accepted it, now that he knew for sure she meant it, it was getting easier to deal with. She could relax a little, almost breathe properly again. The waves that had made themselves at home in her stomach were starting to ease. And whether he could admit it or not, she knew how he felt. Which is why his little tirade didn't bother her.

Gently, she brushed his hair off of his face, smiling softly. "You don't have to say it out loud for it to happen. You'll always feel it. You've already told me, you just told me that if anything happened to me, you'd tear apart Heaven and hell. Do you think that's not love?"

And then he said it, and she wasn't entirely sure because it was just...out there. His manic nature had pulled it out in an almost random moment, but she had definitely heard it. And she knew, the second she did, that she wanted to hear it again. And again and again and however many times she could until the Seal took one of them, or until one of them was killed, whether in this stupid war or against his own idiotic fight with Sherlock.

So she didn't argue when he used a little more force than necessary to get that kiss out of her. In fact, she made it slow and deliberate. She allowed herself to tease him a little, make him work for it. There'd never been any doubt he wanted her. But now he wanted all of her, more than just her body and more than just someone to have at his side. He wanted her as her. And it was incredible. Like a damned drug she couldn't get enough of and that? That was the real reason this was dangerous. But again, not saying it wouldn't make it untrue.

A tiny smirk crossed her face. She couldn't say she'd won, not really. Not when she was just as scared of this as he was. But it did feel like a victory, somehow, peeling off yet another layer of the illusive Jim Moriarty. And she liked it. When his mouth finally released hers, she leaned in to whisper in his ear. "You do that, my love. You drag me to the bedroom and you'll see just what it is I can do to you." He did, after all, deserve a reward.

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