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Tweak says, "...or i'll have to spank you."

Draco Malfoy (_dm) wrote in veritaserum_rp,
@ 2012-08-20 21:58:00

Not even Draco Malfoy's terror could save the gang from a significant wrench in their three week vacation plans: a villa with no house elves.

For weeks, the four had planned on spending an extended holiday on the small, wizarding island of Sealand, located on an isle invisible to the Muggle world south of Italy.

The villa was expansive, fresh and vibrant, and the grounds were peppered with the quaintest little flowers. Positioned next to the sea, there wasn't a better or more private to stay. Except, upon arrival, they weren't greeted with small cups of local red wine like Draco had expected. No plates of sliced tomatoes with sprinkles of Sealand's famous salt flakes. No endearing four piece band to wish them a lovely stay. Instead, their excited entrance was met with a lone, flower scented gust of wind.

"I guess there's been a mix up?" Dina offered, lifting her sunglasses onto her forehead and squinting at the pastel colored structure. "It is beautiful, Draco. I'm sure we'll sort something out..." she trailed off, glancing to see how her husband and best friend were taking it.

"I have sent seventeen howlers," Draco thought out loud to himself. "And they're still insisting that no house elves can be procured for our stay. All I've managed to get out of them is a free stay, free access to the villa for life, and half a vineyard." Draco looked very stricken indeed. "Do they not know who I am? What my name means?!"

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_prettyparvati
2012-08-21 02:20 am UTC (link)

Beneath the brim of her sunhat, Parvati sat in the entranceway of the villa, legs stretched out before her as she had watched her husband fire off howler after howler via firecall with his secretary. Her small fan, a beautiful relic from 1700s England with hand carved handles fluttered in the air to rhyme with the charm she had placed on it.

"Dragon," She attempted to soothe, not wanting her Husband to spiral into a bad mood because of the mix up. "A half vineyard sounds very lovely, don't you think? You'd been mentioning trying your hand at the wine business just the other month. It's still a beautiful place." Yes, certainly, she wanted this holiday to be perfect as it landmarked the beginning of them trying for a baby. Just the thought of it made her grin as she admired her husband's form - gosh, it was going to be such fun, and nothing could ruin her excitement.

"Well," Spencer sighed, leaning against the wall of the villa, "It's all manageable you know. Dina and I don't use house elves." But, Spencer and Dina lived in a flat with a weekly housekeeper - they weren't as down to earth as they liked to pretend - "It'd be fun actually, we can be really quaint."

Parvati looked unsure, "And we certainly can't call our elves, we did promise them this time off, it would be wrong." She voiced this so that her husband would agree with her, so that she wouldn't start thinking that perhaps they should call one of them.

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_dm
2012-08-21 02:29 am UTC (link)

"Half a vineyard," Draco emphasized. "I couldn't even secure the whole thing," Draco said sullenly, but not too loudly. He didn't want Spencer rubbing it in, after all. It was one thing to have their trip ruined this way, it was another to lose face in front of his wife and friends!

"You have gone insane," Dina said flatly to Draco. "Most people would have gotten a 'too bad'. I can't believe you're complaining."

Draco looked torn between feeling flattered and feeling very indignant.

"And besides, Spencer and I are quite capable," Dina agreed, smiling at her husband brightly. The sad part was they both sort of believed their own bullshit. Although the two had weekly help, and liked to eat out at restaurants a lot (translate: no cooking, no dishes), they were deluded into this idea that they were quite reasonable folk. "It's nice to cook and clean sometimes, to really take charge of your self," she added sagely.

Draco glanced at his wife as she made a comment about house elves.

"You're right," he sighed, loudly. "We won't call them. Since these jerk offs are so great at playing house, we might as well see what this is like." Taking his wife's small hand, he peered at her pretty face under the brim of her sunhat. "That means less outrageous hats and no fly goggles for you," he chirped. "We'll really have to roll up our sleeves here."

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_prettyparvati
2012-08-21 02:37 am UTC (link)

"That's right," Parvati built on Dina's comment, taking her husband's hand and pulling herself up to give him a cuddle. "You did lovely! What wonderful compensation - it's lifetime compensations - certainly impressive."

"We really are!" Spencer grinned back at his wife. They really were that couple who fancied themselves above the rest. "It makes everything so much more worth it when it comes from your own hard work! I'm sure the skin on Draco's hands are too delicate to handle any cleaning supplies; but we'll get some callouses on there soon enough!"

"Oh pish," Parvati scoffed, "I'll be wearing my hats and glasses all the time, that's what a holiday is for! I'm sure the housework will be a minor hinderance with four of us here!"

Last words...

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_dm
2012-08-21 02:47 am UTC (link)

Three days had passed, and as Parvati had predicted, the housework hadn't been much of a hinderance thus far. In fact, it had been quite fun so far! The four had spent last night cooking up a storm all together, and enjoyed the starry sky afterwards with a bottle of wine. Picked from the cellars by the boys themselves! It all felt very rewarding indeed. Well, all the wine they drank certainly made them feel very proud of themselves for doing very little.

That morning, the boys had decided to try their hand at hunting at sunrise, so Dina and Parvati made their way to the kitchen to eat some breakfast after a good, luxurious sleep in.

"What do you want to eat?" Dina scratched her head, a little wary at the mess they had all left in the kitchen the night before. "I'm a bit too hungover to make proper breakfast... would you be okay with cereal?" she opened the cupboard to find an assortment of mueslis and whole grain mixes. "Although I can't find a clean spoon anywhere," she trailed off, needing a glass of water to cure her aching head. "Can you pass me a clean cup, Parv?"

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_prettyparvati
2012-08-21 02:55 am UTC (link)

Parvati felt tired. She had gotten used to a life of leisure, waking up late, having a brunch in bed, doing her errands and then snuggling her husband all night long. Suddenly, exhausted after three days of partying + baby making, she just wanted to sleep in or have someone bring her food.

"Um-" She peered into the cupboards, "There are none." Her eyes travelled over the cutlery and dishware in the sink and counters. "I think we've officially run out. Why don't we just have some fruit and toast-" Where was all that food they had bought that first day? Surely they couldn't have finished it all?

It was then that she looked over into the living room. The sun rays shining in made the dust on the counters very visible. "Dina, look how dusty it is! Why, we just dusted the place when we got here!" On the tables were the dishes the boys had used to eat what had obviously been the last bits of fresh produce they had bought.

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_dm
2012-10-01 03:02 am UTC (link)

Dina felt a complaint about to fall from her lips, but squeezing her fists, she shook her head resolutely.

"No matter," she smiled brightly at Parvati, as if this was no matter at all. "We'll just wash up the dishes and then have some cereal. And then we can wear our new sun hats and walk over to the local market, buy some more fruit and stuff for dinner?"

The idea perked Dina up significantly. How truly down to earth and cool of them! Shopping! She already had an outfit in mind-- she'd wear her beautiful yellow sundress, and bring her straw hand bag, and pick the best produce, and charm the local vendors... They'd think My! What lovely young ladies! And so -capable-!

--

Over with the boys, Draco was sweaty and frustrated. Hunting was not as exciting and manly as he thought it would be.

"I guess Sealand's never really been noted for it's wide selection of game..." Draco trailed off, after nearly killing a giant purple butterfly. He had already killed one earlier by accident.

"I bet the girls didn't even notice all the work we did," he added. "We wiped down all the windows before heading out. They're probably sleeping in and enjoying the clean house."

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_prettyparvati
2012-10-01 03:14 am UTC (link)

"-Wash the dishes." Parvati repeated with a hint of rampant distaste in her voice. "But, we simply must dust. What sort of state have we gotten ourselves into? Perhaps we can split the chores?" She eyed the dusty floors and tables - how was this possible? She was tired after last night and had to get up and take care of the house? It was really, very unfair.

"But yes, shopping does sound nice. In fact, I have the perfect little sundress to wear!" Parvati brightened a little as she opened a cupboard to find the stick and rag she had charmed a few days back into a duster. "It's lovely and red with white and blue flowers."

----

"Well, I've done alright." Spencer couldn't help but rub it in a little. Afterall, in his game bag was a small duck that he managed to nab (Though he had been aiming at the much larger one in front of it). "It's a bit of a pain, isn't it though? Hunting without a man." It was a pain. There was no spotter to unjam the pistol as it clogged with the magic liquid they had to constantly refill it with. No man to carry around the game bag and fan them when they got hot. Hunting was the only arena in life where Spencer had been quite used to hands-on help and it was odd trying without. Even a house elf would have been better but he hadn't wanted to mention that lest Draco feel annoyed about it.

"I'm certain they are just lounging about." Spencer laughed, "Well, we didn't quite marry them for their domestic skills, did we? They have to step it up though, this time, perhaps it's good training." He rubbed his forearm against his sweaty forehead. "Maybe we should try fishing next time, might be a little more relaxing for us."

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_dm
2012-10-01 03:22 am UTC (link)

"That's true, Spencer does have very bad allergies..." Dina nodded, proud that she was being so considerate of her husband. "Let's dust, do the shopping, and then the boys can do the dishes? That seems fair," she decided.

Taking two sets of bowls, spoons and cups (the ones that still looked relatively clean), Dina cast cleaning charms on the utensils while Parvati set the table and readied the cereal.

"This is sort of nice, isn't it? I mean, it would be nice to have all of this cleaned for us, but making our own breakfast... I don't know. It makes me oddly attached to everything. What do you think?" Dina asked, spooning some cereal into her mouth. The country milk was so much better than the kind they got over in the city.

--

Draco rolled his eyes as Spencer gloated.

"Great, you've killed enough to feed Parvati during her snack time," he deadpanned.

"But yeah, I agree. I'd rather go back home and see what the girls are up to. Wake them up, if necessary," he laughed. "And yeah, they're probably shopping for souvenirs. We better go make sure they're doing their part." Draco shook his head to himself. There they were, sweating and trying to secure some meat for dinner, AND they had cleaned the windows!! What had the girls done??

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_prettyparvati
2012-10-01 03:29 am UTC (link)

"Well," Parvati smiled with a hint of amusement, "it is just cereal, Dina. But yes, it has been nice." Her eyes glanced at the piles of dishes, "I cannot speak however, for the clean up that follows." She giggled.

It took the girls a lot longer to get ready than they had expected: Tired and hot after dusting the living room down, Parvati had been put into a rather annoyed mood at all the physical labor. The winds had blown quite a lot of dust into the house through the large open windows and doorways.

"I told Draco not to keep these windows open, you know." She grumbled, down on her knees trying to get some dust out of a corner.

Soon they were showering and getting ready for their day out.

-----

The boys missed their wives by just 15 minutes.

"Girls!" Spencer bellowed, "We're home and I was quite the hunter-" He peered into Dina and his bedroom and frowned when he didn't find her. "I think they're gone, Draco. Your shopping thought mustn't be too far off."

It was then his eyes fell on the mounds of dishes and cutlery, "Oh Merlin - Draco, come look at the state of this bloody kitchen." This time, his tone was irritated. "You have to be kidding."

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_dm
2012-10-01 03:45 am UTC (link)

Getting to the "local" market was a lot more difficult than the girls had imagined. Although there was a portkey, it didn't actually lead to the market itself-- it led to a long winding staircase that went up to a garden maze, that THEN led to the market. And although the vendors were very pleasant, they didn't seem particularly impressed that two, young and pretty witches were there, BY THEMSELVES, buying food.

"I feel like my bag's going to break," Dina complained, as bunches of carrots and potatoes poked out from her expensive handmade straw bag. The worst part was, this food would probably only last two days. Then they'd have to come BACK to the market. Surely the boys would have to come next time, how were they to carry so much by themselves? "I hope they realize how much dusting we've done!! We've really over exerted ourselves, no?"

---

As Draco walked into the kitchen, he felt his temper rise.

"You know, I knew that Parvati was a little spoiled, but it's so bloody inconsiderate of those two to just LEAVE this mess. We had the decency to wipe the windows!!!" Draco was reallyyyy going on about those windows. "They probably woke up, had a grand time, and are off buying useless knickknacks for their friends." Pacing around the kitchen, he became more and more riled up. "And they ate most of the best cereal! There's basically nothing left for us." Taking a deep breath, he tried to calm down.

"Well, this is the first real day of labour ahead of us. We'll get them to do the dishes, and all will be right," he managed. "I'm going to show, and then we should wind down with some of that whiskey we brought. Merlin knows we deserve it."

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