InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Two words - Tino"

Jay (_snoogans_) wrote in vas_captio_rpg,
@ 2009-06-19 19:55:00

Entry tags:

!dropped, day 11, jay, location: gym, shannon rutherford

Day 11
Who: Jay and Shannon
What: Figuring out how to go on, I suppose
Where: Behind the gym
When: about 6pm

Jay didn't remember most of the things connecting some events to others. He couldn't remember how he'd found out about Silent Bob, he couldn't remember how he'd gotten to the gym, but he remembered that Logan dude telling him to go there as fast as he could. He'd breezed through the attempt at healing his arms, and now he'd taken enough pain killers to kill a small animal; which meant he was yet again high, which also meant his memory wasn't exactly perfect at this point either.

Most of all, he felt empty. Blank, actually, a blank slate with nothing on it. Confused, too, and lonely though he didn't want to acknowledge that. As he walked outside and around the building, thinking about how for the first time in ever he could use an actual cigarette and not a blunt, he hadn't expected to find Shannon there, looking pretty fucking sad herself. Immediately, Jay sat next to her, mumbling a "Thank God" nobody was supposed to hear. Beyond that, he didn't speak. He couldn't bring himself to.

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ballerinadreams
2009-06-19 02:16 pm UTC (link)

Shannon felt Jay sit beside her more than she saw him do so and when he mumbled to himself, Shannon looked over at him, face drawn with sympathy. He looked... She knew that look. There was no real way to describe it. She knew that look because she wore that look when Boone died.

Luckily for Jay, Shannon knew what it felt like to lose someone with whom she was so close; she knew he wouldn't much feel like talking and she wasn't going to apologize to him for the loss because she knew that only made things feel worse. Instead, very carefully - minding his broken arms, which in and of themselves made her wince - Shannon wrapped an arm around his waist, pressed her lips to his cheek, and then rested her head against his, sitting beside him in silence.

A few moments later, she spoke. "I know exactly how you feel," she said quietly, "and...if you need to talk it out, I won't tell anybody." Shannon knew Jay well enough to know that his ego would probably prevent him from sharing. "And if you don't want to talk at all...I'm still here." With a wince as the wound in her side pulled with the movement, Shannon lifted her head and raised the arm around Jay's waist to the opposite side of his head, guiding him to rest his head on her shoulder, fingers threading absently through his hair.

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_snoogans_
2009-06-19 09:33 pm UTC (link)

Any other time, and Jay's mind would be crawling with dirty thoughts about Shannon wanting to fuck him gently, or something to that effect. Right now, though, this Jay wasn't the Jay of before. He just appreciated the comfort in her gesture, though he didn't move an inch. With two broken arms, it wasn't like he could hug her back anyway.

It wasn't - it really wasn't - the fact that he was too proud to talk, so much as it was the fact that he was still lost for words. It just hurt, was all. And Jay had never really hurt before. He didn't know what it felt like.

Letting her guide his head to her shoulder, Jay just sighed heavily, closing his eyes. "I don't even fucking remember how it's like without Silent Bob." He finally said after a few minutes, his voice completely different from his usual one; there was just hurt and sadness all over it, plus a hint of shock and confusion. "It never happened." He finished.

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