InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Snap into a Slim Jim!"

eugoogoolizer (eugoogoolizer) wrote in vas_captio_rpg,
@ 2009-05-16 00:39:00

Current music:	Jem- "Crazy"
Entry tags:	!dropped, day 08, derek zoolander, gregory house, jack sparrow

Don't Like Problems, I Don't Like Stress, Don't Like To Argue, Like Tears Even Less
Who: Derek Zoolander, Gregory House, and Jack Sparrow
What: Arrival Thread
When: Day 8, early morning
Where: the forest, near the clocktower
Rating: PG-13 for language
Status: Active

Derek groaned loudly as he came to, bringing a hand to his head and sitting up slowly. It must have been a wild party night, he reflected, pursing his lips pensively. Not only could he not remember where he'd been, he sure as hell couldn't remember where he'd gone to sleep and where he was waking up. Staring around at the unfamiliar forest and melting snow, his jaw dropped. "Wow... I hope that Mugatu didn't drive me out here and forget me..." he said, not thinking about his words the way he typically didn't think about anything. Glancing up at the cloudy sky, he wondered if it was going to rain.

Just then, he realized that he could feel something wet seeping into the snakeskin seat of his designer pants. "Oh, no!" he whined, scrambling to his feet and twisting himself around to get a better look at his mud-streaked backside. "Shit! Oh, this is hella lame! Why did this have to happen to my favorite pants?" he mourned, knitting his brows together to demonstrate his chagrin. Even though he was supposed to be careful not to crease his face, since expressions caused wrinkles, he was far too emotional to avoid smiling and frowning. Making a small, frustrated sound, he attempted to wipe the mud from his pants, only succeeding in spreading the mess further.

Glancing to the side, he noticed two other men. One of them was older and wearing a blazer over a t-shirt (so tacky!) and the other looked like he'd had a whack-attack at some point during the... um... the "olden days." Derek wasn't actually sure what century pirates had been in style.

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

jack_and_rum
2009-05-18 09:02 pm UTC (link)

Jack looked completely nonplussed when the bizarrely haired man began chattering like a drunken parrot. His eyebrows shot up and he leaned his head away immediately to get away from the blathering as it assaulted his ears. This was decidedly not an individual he wanted much more to do with if the man could not shut his own mouth long enough to breathe. With an annoyed and tolerant look on his face, Jack pulled his outstretched arms back toward his body and folded them across his chest. "Sounds like you need a good slap. You're hysterical."

He looked thoughtful for a minute and touched his long, twisted hair. He looked back at Derek with a disgusted curl to his lip. There was nothing wrong with his hair. The other man was completely insane. "Burma. We're in Burma," he said with a matter of fact air that meant he knew what he was talking about. It was the same tone he used when he'd gotten the Pearl lost near the Isla de Muerte and had to placate a near-mutinous crew. Not that it had done any good. They'd mutinied later on anyway.

Cue the crazy man's older cousin, apparently. Another man seemed to rise from the forest floor like a cursed mummy and began shouting about pills. With an extremely perplexed looking expression, which was really just his cover for not wanting to deal with these crazy men, Jack stepped back and rocked from side to side slightly as his head spun. Didn't quite feel like rum he'd had. Suddenly he was falling and he landed hard on his ass on a rather large bush. He hollered in surprise and stumbled over himself to get out of it, covered in prickles. He saw what had caused him to fall as he landed on his hands and knees to pull the prickles from his butt. There was a small box down here. Jack's eyes widened. "Ohhh."

(Reply to this) (Thread)

vicodin_snark
2009-05-20 04:54 pm UTC (link)

Officially, Cuddy and Wilson had gotten a one up on him. That was the only logical explanation and for a man who was used to taking strange leaps in logic, he wasn't about to look elsewhere. Because he wasn't going to give credence to this. At all. Because saying he had been taken and dropped in the middle of nowhere would be admitting something he really didn't want to admit.

That he was in the middle of nowhere with a schizophrenic and... a schizophrenic. Wonderful.

"Burma?" House asked, lifting an eyebrow in the direction of the pirate. "Right. Because Burma always looks like a frozen tundra at this time of the year. Which is why I never once wanted to go there on vacation. Didn't want to freeze my ass off." In other words, idiot.

No, that didn't at all compare to the... whatever Derek was. "I never said I was through with them," House replied, picking up the small box at his feet and began leafing through it. No pills. Fuck. "It is called the fine art of sarcasm, obviously something you never had the opportunity to pick up." Eyes flicking to Jack, House frowned when the man fell and (amusingly enough) managed to get prickers in his ass. Oh this was just wonderful. He was stuck in the middle of nowhere with dumb and dumber.

"Watch it," House said. "I don't think there's anything by way of antiseptic in these kits. Last thing we need is you turning green and having it fall off. Or worse." At least that would be interesting. "All right. What we need is some place to stay. Because outside with no shelter is not going to cut it. Not in these surroundings."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

eugoogoolizer
2009-05-21 02:57 am UTC (link)

At the pirate-man's suggestion that Derek deserved a slap, the male model's chiseled jaw dropped. "What? You are whack! No one slaps me!" he insisted, crossing his arms stormily, shoving his lower lip out further, and watching the pirate amble over towards some bushes, after confidently proclaiming that they were in Burma. "Burma? Like... isn't that somewhere in Africa?" Derek asked, furrowing his brow in deep concentration. He watched curiously as the pirate picked up a box. "What's that? Treasure?" he asked, the topic being on his mind since he was apparently conversing with a pirate.

"Wait," Derek said, when the older guy remarked about Burma's climate. "Burma's cold? Well then... maybe we really could be in Burma! Hey, pirate guy! You might be right! I think that we're in Burma!" He happily began rooting through his own box, but became increasingly more crestfallen as he explored the contents. "I was at least hoping that there'd be some hair gel here... snap!"

(Reply to this) (Parent)

(Read comments) -