Sam (![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} soulless) wrote in ![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} valloic,@ 2020-12-17 14:15:00 |
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| Entry tags: | !: action/thread/log, ₴ inactive: dean winchester |
Dean Winchester
Sam Winchester
WHO Dean and Sam Winchester •
WHERE The Bunker •
WHEN Late Night, 12/15
these dreams
Sam gets his memories... and moreWARNINGS SPN SPOILERS
Dean had decided to spend the night at the bunker, figuring it would be a good idea to spend some time apart from Sasha. Not that he didn’t enjoy his time with her, he just needed to get his shit together and not keep her hanging on forever. He had no plans to stop seeing her, but he was still unsure about keeping their marriage valid. He had been in the middle of a dream, he and Sasha living together in a happy life. He laid there with a smile on his face until he suddenly heard a scream.
He awoke swiftly and grabbed his gun from beneath the pillow, sitting up with the gun cocked. He paused a moment after silence, and then he heard it again, only it sounded like laughter now? “What the-” he moved to rise from the bed and slowly crept across the bedroom floor and to the door. He opened the door to see the lights on in the hall, and he heard another shriek, followed by childish laughter.
“Sammy?!? What the fuck is going on??!” Dean called out as he came around the corner to see a small figure whip across the hall. “Please tell me there’s not a fucking leprechaun running around the damn bunker.”
Sam was startled awake when he heard the sound, a scream, a deep and almost mournful wail and immediately he jumped into action. He grabbed the figure next to him and pulled him closer, into his lap and whispered little words of comfort as he softly kissed his hair. “It’s okay, baby, shh,” he said, reaching over and clicking on the lamp. He felt the bed for a wet spot, was relieved when he found none, and wrapped both hands around the tiny boy in his arms, snuggling into his shoulder. “Daddy’s here, you’re okay now. It was just a nasty dream.” He looked over into his son’s tear-stained face and wiped them away with his fingers, and felt a little tug on his beard. Sam nuzzled him, the whiskers on his face tickling first the boy's neck, and then his stomach, turning his tears into peals of screeching laughter. Maybe it was a bad thing to rile his kid up so late at night, but it was his kid, and it wasn’t hurting anything. It was probably time to get up to start the day anyway. Before he realized it, his son was sliding out of his lap and heading for the door, opening it and after a moment's hesitation, he took off, with Sam not so far behind him. “C’mon Delly-belly, you’ll wake everybody up, and I think Uncle Dean stayed -,” Sam stopped as he heard Dean in the near distance, as everything seemed to come together for him at that moment. “Oh shit,” he whispered, and started off behind his son again, but ran into his brother instead. “Put your gun down,” he said, pausing for a minute to look at Dean, tears immediately forming in his eyes that he blinked away. He needed a minute to resolve this in his mind. He was still in Vallo, but - another bout of laughter made his feet move again. “Help me find him.”
“Put my g-” Dean looked up at Sam in confusion and suddenly began to wonder if he was still dreaming. He let the hand with his gun lower, and he reached up with the other to touch his brother’s face. He gave a slight tug on his beard, which seemed completely real, but how the- “dude, I don’t have a lumberjack beard, do I?” He questioned curiously, his hand going to touch his own face as he recalled how they had all woken up once with their beards mysteriously gone and then back the following day. “Nope, just you.” This was just all sorts of weird, and the longer he looked at Sam, the more he realized how different his brother appeared. He had somehow aged overnight. Either that or he was going crazy, both of which were entirely possible at this point. “Sammy, what the hell is going on, and who-” his jaw dropped when he saw a child round the corner and throw himself at Sam’s legs, hugging them tightly. “Uh, who is that, where did he come from, and why is he here?”
“Seriously? Lumberjack?,” Sam shook his head as Dean’s hand went to his own face. “It’s just a beard, Dean, it’s not contagious.” He couldn’t understand the look he was getting from Dean, and reached up to feel if anything was out of place, and scratched his head. He felt normal, maybe a sleep line from his pillow was lingering? Nope, it was still all coming together. This was the weirdest feeling he had ever had in his life, and that was really saying something. Goddamnit, why did this have to happen while he was asleep? Before he could say anything a small weight had hit his legs, making his stumble slightly, and he looked down with a smile. Yeah, he knew who that boy was, and it tugged on his heart that he actually realized how much time he had missed with him. He bent down and knelt beside him, unable to help the grin when he picked him up and dislodged him from his legs. Sam took a step closer towards Dean and pointed at him. “Who’s that, baby?” In response Sam was met with a happy smile and a small finger pointing at Dean as well, next to his own. “Uncle Dean!”
Okay, no. This wasn’t real. He was either in a very real dream, or he had woken up in some kind of a twilight zone. There was no other explanation for it. Sam was older, and he had a fucking child. A child and a beard. As far as Dean was aware, his brother had gone to bed much younger-looking, clean-shaven, and most importantly, childless. “Is this still twenty twenty, or have I been zapped into the future somehow?” His gaze dropped to the child standing and pointing at him, the child who had just called him, Uncle Dean. None of this had been in his dream, and there hadn’t been enough time for Sam to possibly have a child with someone. Unless...this was part of Sam’s future. The confusion slowly faded, and Dean clicked the safety on his gun before he crouched down to look at his nephew eye to eye. “Hey, buddy, it’s nice to meet you. What’s your name?” This was what happened after he was gone, and it was difficult not to feel a little emotional over it.
Sam wasn’t going to cry at this. He just wasn’t. Not even with tears threatening and a scratchy, tight feeling at the back of his throat. If he stopped and closed his eyes for just a minute, he’d see everything that happened in that barn, he’d seen Dean dying in his arms and feel the loss as if it had just happened. No, he was going to focus on what was right in front of him, how much he loved that little boy, how much some part of him had wanted this exact meeting to happen. “Dean, too!” the younger Dean said loudly, excitedly holding up four fingers, and making Sam chuckle. The little boy raised forward and threw his arms around Dean’s neck, and rested his head in its crook, like it was something he had done every single day of his life. “Dean Jr,” Sam clarified, he wasn’t exactly sure yet how he knew that, but he just knew. “He’s a Junior. I made sure that was on his birth certificate when he was born.” All the memories, the future, the past, his time here - everything was rushing through his head rapidly at the moment, and he put a hand on the wall to keep his balance on the floor and not let everything overwhelm him.
"You-" before he could say another word, the toddler had thrown his arms around his neck and was hugging him tightly. His brother had named his son after him and when Dean Jr. rested his head against his neck, there wasn't a damn thing he could do to stop the tears from flowing. He wrapped his arms around the child and rose to his feet, hugging his nephew to his chest. "You have the best name, and the best daddy ever. How lucky are you, little dude?" He grinned brightly and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. He had become so enamoured by the boy that he hadn't noticed his brother holding onto the wall. His smile faded and he looked to his brother in concern, reaching out with his right arm to place a hand against his shoulder. "Sammy, are you okay? Do you need to sit down, maybe? I can get you some water."
This was something he thought he’d never see, Dean and little Dean together like this. Yesterday he wouldn’t have thought he’d ever see himself with a son, but those memories seemed so far away, like it was years ago, and he couldn't imagine himself now without his little boy. Watching Dean with him felt like icing on the cake, and he could barely get over the sight he was witnessing. “No, no, I’m good,” he waved off Dean's offers, and stood straighter but still leaned against the wall, still reeling. It seemed like he had lived an entire lifetime in under a minute. “This is crazy, Dean, I remember things that - ” he continued, reaching over and clearing a line of tears from his brother's face. It was the most amazing, worst and strangest moment all rolled into one, that he had ever had in his life, and he was looking over at his brother and son with tears in his eyes.
“You’re right, it is crazy, but it’s this fucking place.” He assured his brother and moved closer to wrap an arm around his waist. Just yesterday they had been fighting about his marriage and now things were incredibly different. He was holding his nephew, Sam’s son. How the fuck was any of this even real? His brother had aged considerably, and with the way he looked at him, Dean could only surmise that Sam had watched him die. “I’m sorry, Sammy,” Dean whispered thinly, tears forming in his eyes again. It was a blanket apology, for all the times he had upset his brother, knowing they were both on the same page again. An apology for dying, even. “I think we should go sit down.” His arm remained tight around Sam’s waist and he walked them through the halls to the kitchen, which was the closest room with seating. “How does he know who I am, though?” He questioned his brother, turning his head to look at Dean Jr. who was nestled comfortably against him. “I know that he never met me before. Unless I missed something? I mean, I know I died and all, but you didn’t bring me back. Right? I woke up just before you said the words…”
“Me too,” Sam leaned his head against Dean’s and nodded softly at the apology. “Me too.” Anyone with any semblance of sense would see how crazy all of this was. Sam had just decided that he was going to take a step back from Dean and not be so involved in his big brother's life. It seemed more and more to him like that was what Dean wanted anyway, so he was just going to make it happen and see how that worked out. It might have been what the Sam that had aged with him, that he knew, had done, but it felt different to him. And now, he had awakened possibly as that other Sam. The older one. The one he had told Sasha he hoped he’d never be. He had the memories for it. They were still coming. Taking a step away was the last thing he wanted to do. It felt like ages since he’d been around Dean, but at the same time it had only been a few hours. Sitting down was a good idea. He could walk, but the extra hand to make sure of it as they went to the kitchen was something he was grateful to have. When they got to the kitchen, he pulled out a chair and sat down, his eyes focused on his brother and his son. He wanted to reach for the little guy, but as much as he wanted to hold him and as much as he was fascinated that he was his, he was more caught up by Dean holding him, something he knew he wanted but could never have. And there it was. “Um,” Sam blinked and covered his eyes for a minute, crying silently into his palm, and then wiped them away with the back of his hand when he thought he’d gained composure back. He hadn’t. “There weren’t any demons that would deal, there weren’t any angels that would even acknowledge me, no witches, no spells, no nothing anymore, so I had to -,” he shook his head. “There was a picture of you in his room, a big one, and pictures of you and me all over our house. And I talked about you all the time. He might know your face better than mine.”
The pain that his brother was feeling now was exactly what Dean had been trying to avoid by not telling him all the details. He felt guilty for bringing his death up again, after seeing how emotional it was for Sam. After all, his brother had just lived through the dream of it, and it was probably still fresh. He wanted to set Dean Jr down and give his brother a hug, but at the same time, he was reluctant to let the kid go. Still, it seemed like maybe Sam needed him. He turned his head and pressed a kiss to his DJ’s cheek and set him down. “Go give your daddy a hug, I think he needs it.” Dean took a seat and leaned back with a sigh, his hands rubbing briskly over his face. Of course, Sam had still tried to resurrect him, but it had been a no go. “He didn’t come with any clothes, did he? If not, I guess we’ll have to go shopping.” He wondered randomly, wanting to make sure his nephew had everything he needed. “We can clean out a room for him and make it a playroom. Preferably one that doesn't have a pentagram on the floor.” Dean laughed in amusement and shook his head, trying to lighten the mood. “We’ll have to make sure all the doors stay locked from now on, and I guess I have to put my weapons somewhere he can’t reach.” Fuck. Living with a toddler would be complicated. He remembered listening to Lisa’s sister go on about all the things they needed to do in order to baby proof the house, and now he understood. “Sammy-” he was about to ask if he was married, and who the mother was, but he didn’t want to bring up more painful memories. “You don’t have to raise him alone, okay? I got your back, we can take care of him together. You know I’m good with that sort of stuff.”
Sam heard DJ’s feet scurry across the kitchen floor and he turned in his chair and scooped him up, pulling the boy close to his chest and dropping kisses to his mess of brown hair. He smelled like baby shampoo and his arms and cheeks were soft and warm, and he was exactly what Sam needed to start feeling better. “I don’t know - I didn’t have time to check, he just woke up in my bed and - it’s insane how I just - felt like he went to sleep with me and belonged there. And there’s no question that I know him, and love him,” Sam looked down at DJ’s face, his eyes were half lidded, his thumb was stuck between his lips, and he shifted him so he was lying on his back. “But no, I don’t think he came with accessories. At least he’s out of diapers. I went with cloth though, when he was, it’s supposed to be better on their butts.” DJ turned his head and smiled at Dean, reaching the hand that wasn’t the owner of the thumb in his mouth across the table towards him, fixing eyes on his uncle. Sam laughed. “I don’t think we’re gonna escape pentagrams anywhere here. They’re carved into walls and probably in places we haven’t seen yet, but at least we’ll know he's safe. And maybe Jack or Cas can do something… angelic baby proofing, so you don’t have to put your weapons away. I don’t want you to feel like you have to change a lot. Maybe little, tiny stuff.” At least he had stopped crying, and the memories had stopped flooding into his head at a rapid pace, he felt… not completely okay, but better. He still had a lot to sort out, but at least he had time to do it. “Me and Dean have been on our own since he was born. His mom was a waitress in Missouri, she didn’t want a kid so, I have full custody. This little man is all mine.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss to DJ’s forehead and looked back up with glistening eyes. “And I know you’re really good with kids, Dean, really good. I can’t tell you how - good it feels to know that he’s gonna be growing up with his uncle. Not just pictures and stories and your car… really you.”
“Hey, dude, I don’t care what I have to change. I get to live with my nephew, something I wasn’t supposed to get in the first place. I really don’t care if I have to put all my weapons somewhere safe. Whatever I have to do, it will be worth the effort.” Dean certainly wasn’t going to complain about a single thing. This was the opportunity of a lifetime and it was hard to believe it was real, and that it wasn’t just another fucked up dream. He watched his brother with his son and he wasn’t surprised to see how good he was with DJ. Sam was so full of love and Dean was glad he finally had someone to share that love with. “I’m sorry about his mom. But you have me now, don’t forget.” A sense of guilt weighed on his heart, but DJ might not have existed if Dean hadn’t passed when he did. He hated to say it, but it really seemed like everything happened for a reason. Dean hesitated a moment before rising from his chair and he walked over to where Sam and DJ sat, moving to stand behind them. His hand dropped to rest against Sam’s shoulder and he gave it a firm squeeze. “We got this, Sammy. We’ll go out shopping for him tomorrow, I can take care of whatever he needs. I just signed up with the defense department and I’ve been working at LUX for a while now. I’ve got more than enough to take care of you two.”
Sam was startled awake when he heard the sound, a scream, a deep and almost mournful wail and immediately he jumped into action. He grabbed the figure next to him and pulled him closer, into his lap and whispered little words of comfort as he softly kissed his hair. “It’s okay, baby, shh,” he said, reaching over and clicking on the lamp. He felt the bed for a wet spot, was relieved when he found none, and wrapped both hands around the tiny boy in his arms, snuggling into his shoulder. “Daddy’s here, you’re okay now. It was just a nasty dream.” He looked over into his son’s tear-stained face and wiped them away with his fingers, and felt a little tug on his beard. Sam nuzzled him, the whiskers on his face tickling first the boy's neck, and then his stomach, turning his tears into peals of screeching laughter. Maybe it was a bad thing to rile his kid up so late at night, but it was his kid, and it wasn’t hurting anything. It was probably time to get up to start the day anyway. Before he realized it, his son was sliding out of his lap and heading for the door, opening it and after a moment's hesitation, he took off, with Sam not so far behind him. “C’mon Delly-belly, you’ll wake everybody up, and I think Uncle Dean stayed -,” Sam stopped as he heard Dean in the near distance, as everything seemed to come together for him at that moment. “Oh shit,” he whispered, and started off behind his son again, but ran into his brother instead. “Put your gun down,” he said, pausing for a minute to look at Dean, tears immediately forming in his eyes that he blinked away. He needed a minute to resolve this in his mind. He was still in Vallo, but - another bout of laughter made his feet move again. “Help me find him.”
“Put my g-” Dean looked up at Sam in confusion and suddenly began to wonder if he was still dreaming. He let the hand with his gun lower, and he reached up with the other to touch his brother’s face. He gave a slight tug on his beard, which seemed completely real, but how the- “dude, I don’t have a lumberjack beard, do I?” He questioned curiously, his hand going to touch his own face as he recalled how they had all woken up once with their beards mysteriously gone and then back the following day. “Nope, just you.” This was just all sorts of weird, and the longer he looked at Sam, the more he realized how different his brother appeared. He had somehow aged overnight. Either that or he was going crazy, both of which were entirely possible at this point. “Sammy, what the hell is going on, and who-” his jaw dropped when he saw a child round the corner and throw himself at Sam’s legs, hugging them tightly. “Uh, who is that, where did he come from, and why is he here?”
“Seriously? Lumberjack?,” Sam shook his head as Dean’s hand went to his own face. “It’s just a beard, Dean, it’s not contagious.” He couldn’t understand the look he was getting from Dean, and reached up to feel if anything was out of place, and scratched his head. He felt normal, maybe a sleep line from his pillow was lingering? Nope, it was still all coming together. This was the weirdest feeling he had ever had in his life, and that was really saying something. Goddamnit, why did this have to happen while he was asleep? Before he could say anything a small weight had hit his legs, making his stumble slightly, and he looked down with a smile. Yeah, he knew who that boy was, and it tugged on his heart that he actually realized how much time he had missed with him. He bent down and knelt beside him, unable to help the grin when he picked him up and dislodged him from his legs. Sam took a step closer towards Dean and pointed at him. “Who’s that, baby?” In response Sam was met with a happy smile and a small finger pointing at Dean as well, next to his own. “Uncle Dean!”
Okay, no. This wasn’t real. He was either in a very real dream, or he had woken up in some kind of a twilight zone. There was no other explanation for it. Sam was older, and he had a fucking child. A child and a beard. As far as Dean was aware, his brother had gone to bed much younger-looking, clean-shaven, and most importantly, childless. “Is this still twenty twenty, or have I been zapped into the future somehow?” His gaze dropped to the child standing and pointing at him, the child who had just called him, Uncle Dean. None of this had been in his dream, and there hadn’t been enough time for Sam to possibly have a child with someone. Unless...this was part of Sam’s future. The confusion slowly faded, and Dean clicked the safety on his gun before he crouched down to look at his nephew eye to eye. “Hey, buddy, it’s nice to meet you. What’s your name?” This was what happened after he was gone, and it was difficult not to feel a little emotional over it.
Sam wasn’t going to cry at this. He just wasn’t. Not even with tears threatening and a scratchy, tight feeling at the back of his throat. If he stopped and closed his eyes for just a minute, he’d see everything that happened in that barn, he’d seen Dean dying in his arms and feel the loss as if it had just happened. No, he was going to focus on what was right in front of him, how much he loved that little boy, how much some part of him had wanted this exact meeting to happen. “Dean, too!” the younger Dean said loudly, excitedly holding up four fingers, and making Sam chuckle. The little boy raised forward and threw his arms around Dean’s neck, and rested his head in its crook, like it was something he had done every single day of his life. “Dean Jr,” Sam clarified, he wasn’t exactly sure yet how he knew that, but he just knew. “He’s a Junior. I made sure that was on his birth certificate when he was born.” All the memories, the future, the past, his time here - everything was rushing through his head rapidly at the moment, and he put a hand on the wall to keep his balance on the floor and not let everything overwhelm him.
"You-" before he could say another word, the toddler had thrown his arms around his neck and was hugging him tightly. His brother had named his son after him and when Dean Jr. rested his head against his neck, there wasn't a damn thing he could do to stop the tears from flowing. He wrapped his arms around the child and rose to his feet, hugging his nephew to his chest. "You have the best name, and the best daddy ever. How lucky are you, little dude?" He grinned brightly and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. He had become so enamoured by the boy that he hadn't noticed his brother holding onto the wall. His smile faded and he looked to his brother in concern, reaching out with his right arm to place a hand against his shoulder. "Sammy, are you okay? Do you need to sit down, maybe? I can get you some water."
This was something he thought he’d never see, Dean and little Dean together like this. Yesterday he wouldn’t have thought he’d ever see himself with a son, but those memories seemed so far away, like it was years ago, and he couldn't imagine himself now without his little boy. Watching Dean with him felt like icing on the cake, and he could barely get over the sight he was witnessing. “No, no, I’m good,” he waved off Dean's offers, and stood straighter but still leaned against the wall, still reeling. It seemed like he had lived an entire lifetime in under a minute. “This is crazy, Dean, I remember things that - ” he continued, reaching over and clearing a line of tears from his brother's face. It was the most amazing, worst and strangest moment all rolled into one, that he had ever had in his life, and he was looking over at his brother and son with tears in his eyes.
“You’re right, it is crazy, but it’s this fucking place.” He assured his brother and moved closer to wrap an arm around his waist. Just yesterday they had been fighting about his marriage and now things were incredibly different. He was holding his nephew, Sam’s son. How the fuck was any of this even real? His brother had aged considerably, and with the way he looked at him, Dean could only surmise that Sam had watched him die. “I’m sorry, Sammy,” Dean whispered thinly, tears forming in his eyes again. It was a blanket apology, for all the times he had upset his brother, knowing they were both on the same page again. An apology for dying, even. “I think we should go sit down.” His arm remained tight around Sam’s waist and he walked them through the halls to the kitchen, which was the closest room with seating. “How does he know who I am, though?” He questioned his brother, turning his head to look at Dean Jr. who was nestled comfortably against him. “I know that he never met me before. Unless I missed something? I mean, I know I died and all, but you didn’t bring me back. Right? I woke up just before you said the words…”
“Me too,” Sam leaned his head against Dean’s and nodded softly at the apology. “Me too.” Anyone with any semblance of sense would see how crazy all of this was. Sam had just decided that he was going to take a step back from Dean and not be so involved in his big brother's life. It seemed more and more to him like that was what Dean wanted anyway, so he was just going to make it happen and see how that worked out. It might have been what the Sam that had aged with him, that he knew, had done, but it felt different to him. And now, he had awakened possibly as that other Sam. The older one. The one he had told Sasha he hoped he’d never be. He had the memories for it. They were still coming. Taking a step away was the last thing he wanted to do. It felt like ages since he’d been around Dean, but at the same time it had only been a few hours. Sitting down was a good idea. He could walk, but the extra hand to make sure of it as they went to the kitchen was something he was grateful to have. When they got to the kitchen, he pulled out a chair and sat down, his eyes focused on his brother and his son. He wanted to reach for the little guy, but as much as he wanted to hold him and as much as he was fascinated that he was his, he was more caught up by Dean holding him, something he knew he wanted but could never have. And there it was. “Um,” Sam blinked and covered his eyes for a minute, crying silently into his palm, and then wiped them away with the back of his hand when he thought he’d gained composure back. He hadn’t. “There weren’t any demons that would deal, there weren’t any angels that would even acknowledge me, no witches, no spells, no nothing anymore, so I had to -,” he shook his head. “There was a picture of you in his room, a big one, and pictures of you and me all over our house. And I talked about you all the time. He might know your face better than mine.”
The pain that his brother was feeling now was exactly what Dean had been trying to avoid by not telling him all the details. He felt guilty for bringing his death up again, after seeing how emotional it was for Sam. After all, his brother had just lived through the dream of it, and it was probably still fresh. He wanted to set Dean Jr down and give his brother a hug, but at the same time, he was reluctant to let the kid go. Still, it seemed like maybe Sam needed him. He turned his head and pressed a kiss to his DJ’s cheek and set him down. “Go give your daddy a hug, I think he needs it.” Dean took a seat and leaned back with a sigh, his hands rubbing briskly over his face. Of course, Sam had still tried to resurrect him, but it had been a no go. “He didn’t come with any clothes, did he? If not, I guess we’ll have to go shopping.” He wondered randomly, wanting to make sure his nephew had everything he needed. “We can clean out a room for him and make it a playroom. Preferably one that doesn't have a pentagram on the floor.” Dean laughed in amusement and shook his head, trying to lighten the mood. “We’ll have to make sure all the doors stay locked from now on, and I guess I have to put my weapons somewhere he can’t reach.” Fuck. Living with a toddler would be complicated. He remembered listening to Lisa’s sister go on about all the things they needed to do in order to baby proof the house, and now he understood. “Sammy-” he was about to ask if he was married, and who the mother was, but he didn’t want to bring up more painful memories. “You don’t have to raise him alone, okay? I got your back, we can take care of him together. You know I’m good with that sort of stuff.”
Sam heard DJ’s feet scurry across the kitchen floor and he turned in his chair and scooped him up, pulling the boy close to his chest and dropping kisses to his mess of brown hair. He smelled like baby shampoo and his arms and cheeks were soft and warm, and he was exactly what Sam needed to start feeling better. “I don’t know - I didn’t have time to check, he just woke up in my bed and - it’s insane how I just - felt like he went to sleep with me and belonged there. And there’s no question that I know him, and love him,” Sam looked down at DJ’s face, his eyes were half lidded, his thumb was stuck between his lips, and he shifted him so he was lying on his back. “But no, I don’t think he came with accessories. At least he’s out of diapers. I went with cloth though, when he was, it’s supposed to be better on their butts.” DJ turned his head and smiled at Dean, reaching the hand that wasn’t the owner of the thumb in his mouth across the table towards him, fixing eyes on his uncle. Sam laughed. “I don’t think we’re gonna escape pentagrams anywhere here. They’re carved into walls and probably in places we haven’t seen yet, but at least we’ll know he's safe. And maybe Jack or Cas can do something… angelic baby proofing, so you don’t have to put your weapons away. I don’t want you to feel like you have to change a lot. Maybe little, tiny stuff.” At least he had stopped crying, and the memories had stopped flooding into his head at a rapid pace, he felt… not completely okay, but better. He still had a lot to sort out, but at least he had time to do it. “Me and Dean have been on our own since he was born. His mom was a waitress in Missouri, she didn’t want a kid so, I have full custody. This little man is all mine.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss to DJ’s forehead and looked back up with glistening eyes. “And I know you’re really good with kids, Dean, really good. I can’t tell you how - good it feels to know that he’s gonna be growing up with his uncle. Not just pictures and stories and your car… really you.”
“Hey, dude, I don’t care what I have to change. I get to live with my nephew, something I wasn’t supposed to get in the first place. I really don’t care if I have to put all my weapons somewhere safe. Whatever I have to do, it will be worth the effort.” Dean certainly wasn’t going to complain about a single thing. This was the opportunity of a lifetime and it was hard to believe it was real, and that it wasn’t just another fucked up dream. He watched his brother with his son and he wasn’t surprised to see how good he was with DJ. Sam was so full of love and Dean was glad he finally had someone to share that love with. “I’m sorry about his mom. But you have me now, don’t forget.” A sense of guilt weighed on his heart, but DJ might not have existed if Dean hadn’t passed when he did. He hated to say it, but it really seemed like everything happened for a reason. Dean hesitated a moment before rising from his chair and he walked over to where Sam and DJ sat, moving to stand behind them. His hand dropped to rest against Sam’s shoulder and he gave it a firm squeeze. “We got this, Sammy. We’ll go out shopping for him tomorrow, I can take care of whatever he needs. I just signed up with the defense department and I’ve been working at LUX for a while now. I’ve got more than enough to take care of you two.”