InsaneJournal

Adora going back to work was, like, an inevitable thing - but was Catra thrilled about it? No. No she was not. She tried not to pout, tried not to scrunch her nose up in protest and kept her ears upright (versus them dipping low, pitifully) when the day came. She liked their little bubble. If there was a way they could just spend their time as full-time stay-at-home MILFs (an actual thing she had mentioned to Adora before), she would urge them to take it.

But life moved on, this time with Finn in tow, and that was their arrangement: Adora would be back in Defense full-time (“It’s only four days a week, Catra,” she said, as if that wasn’t four days too many!), and Catra would be the stay-at-home parent (and on Reserves, Marlena would watch Finn if Adora needed a hand). The role came with some anxiety - am I cut out for it? - and there’d been comfort that Adora was usually with her when tending to Finn, so it was something of an adjustment. Their routine had to be tweaked.

There was a whiteboard up in the kitchen that had a tentative outline for their days; meal planning, laundry, groceries, Adora’s schedule, appointments. Had this all been drawn out and compiled by Adora? Nope - this had been Catra, indulging in a rare moment of her own neurotic organization. She also penciled in things to do for herself; yoga and art again to start off with, things she could do at home.

Those might have to be done with Finn either in a sling across her chest or in a swing, but that's fine too. They were an immobile potato still, smiling and purring and cute. She managed gladly.

Like today - she had dinner prepped and ready to hit the oven whenever Adora came home, and laundry was tumbling in the dryer. The afternoon was warm, and she thought it was a good time to do yoga outdoors today. The mat was brought outside, and Finn was happy to watch in their electric swing. Catra would talk to them while she did her poses, of course; make funny little faces and voices their way, and Finn would let out a giggle and kick their legs.

“Bet you’d laugh even harder if you saw your mama try some of these positions,” Catra snickered at Finn, who was smiling and drooling around the fist in their mouth. “She makes funny noises and gets all red-faced when her legs don’t bend the way she wants them to.”

Finn giggled louder. Melog, who was on guard - and not with Kosmo, she tried not to ask too much about that - perked up, and began to wander towards the yard’s gate.

At Alex’s request, Kara and Lena had kept her re-arrival in Vallo, this time with her daughter in tow, to themselves. She’d checked in with the DOA and taken advantage of the stipend, but other than that, she and Esme had remained mostly confined to L-Corp for the past three days. Part of that was a need to sleep – dimension-hopping had pulled them back in time six hours, leaving both of them even more in need of sleep when Vallo’s evening had fallen.

(The sugar rush had done a number on Esme, too. Thanks, Aunt Lena.)

It wasn’t until day four that Alex made an effort to get out of the house. She’d been filled in on everything she’d missed, and she knew immediately who she needed to see most pressingly. It would have been true regardless – she hadn’t cultivated many tight bonds in her time here, too caught up in the feeling of being unsettled – but the past year’s events made it even clearer.

Esme stayed behind with her aunts for this visit. Alex wasn’t sure how long the two of them would be in Vallo, but she felt confident enough there would be time for a kid-present visit later on down the line. Right now, she just needed some time with the honorary youngest sister and the new arrival that she’d missed. It was better to do that without her excitable daughter tagging along.

Melog met her at Darla’s front yard gate, and Alex held out a hand toward them, offering it to inspect. The alien cat acted pretty much like any other cat she’d ever met – a few tentative sniffs before their face rubbed against her hand and before long, they were pushed up on their hind legs and nuzzling into her face instead.

“Hi,” she chuckled, rubbing their mane with firm hands. She caught a glimpse of Catra past the purring big cat and smiled at her. “Think I can get past the front gate?”

Melog purred in approval. They knew who this was; magic didn’t sing from Alex, which caused them to believe that her presence wasn’t a trap. Once they dropped back onto all fours, the nudge they gave her to enter was insistent. Pushy, even.

That was when Catra felt that telepathic pull, a feeling that translated to look over. Melog wasn’t alarmed so she took a moment to posture herself out a pose, use a burp cloth to wipe Finn’s face free of some of their own slobber, and then her head turned. A breeze hit and the stray hairs that escape her bun flew across her line of vision, and she had to push that away quickly to confirm that what she was seeing was –

“There’s no way,” she told herself, the words said with a soft breath of a gasp. That was a face she saw only in pictures now, or in the letter she’d left behind, like she’d been prepared for this place to whisk her away. Vallo was cruel like that. It gave her a patchwork of people that she learned to love as family, all of them from different worlds, and most of them were gone. She’d never have a chance to find them back home. Dan, Richie.

Alex.

Catra rose to her feet, pulling at the hem of her athletic top as nerves took a hold of her body. She just kind of – watched, waiting for this moment to reveal itself into some sort of trick.

Alex allowed herself to be pushed, thankful that Melog seemed certain she was who she was. She’d heard the doppelganger story from Kara, and the last thing she wanted to do was give Catra and Adora another scare like that. She knew she’d have felt like bursting a blood vessel in their shoes. She might even have made good on one of those idle death threats, no matter how pathetic and sad the doppelganger may be.

By the time Melog left her to stand on her own two feet, she was still standing a good yard back from Catra. She wasn’t expecting a hug; Catra wasn’t Kara, and Alex wouldn’t ask for her to be. She was willing to do all this on her terms, knowing how long it had been. She knew there had to be a touch of nerves inherent in this situation for both of them; it was inevitable, especially after a year apart. She felt a pang for that year she’d been missing when she saw the awe in heterochromatic eyes, like Alex’s presence was too surreal for her to process.

“Hi, kid,” she said, her smile close-mouthed and tentative. Once upon a time, Catra had hated being called that, but Alex couldn’t think of a better icebreaker. “Is it okay that I’m here?”

No, Catra definitely wasn’t Kara. She was prickly, scowled a lot, and didn't care for unsolicited acts of affection from people. Most people. Some were allowed. That pool of some people grew with time, and the person she’d been when she last saw Alex was still learning. She wasn’t all that confident about letting people love her. She tried, although it came with struggles and hesitance.

But the person she was now fought it less. The person she was now took those steps forward, and without another moment’s hesitation, she threw her arms around Alex and captured her into a hug. It was the hug she regretted never giving her while she was here before – and she’d given up on the chance to fix that.

“I’m letting the ‘kid’ thing slide,” she told her, and her voice sounded so furious but it was the only way to keep those mushy feelings in check, the kind that wanted to make themselves known by leaking out of her eyes. Catra refused.

Alex was surprised, but she didn’t think it was noticeable before Catra had swept in to hug her. She didn’t hesitate to hug her back, holding her close despite the fury in her voice. She knew Catra well enough to know anger was just the easiest emotion to access in a situation as heavily emotionally charged at this one. Even if it wasn’t – well, maybe she deserved a little fury in her direction. She had disappeared, after all.

“I won’t do it again, promise,” she assured her. “I don’t think it’s allowed when you have one of your own now.” She grinned into Catra’s hair and squeezed her a little tighter. “I missed you.”

Catra didn’t let her go right away. She held on, conscious about the way her claws dug into her – she wasn’t Adora, she didn’t know how rough they could be (or self-heal). “But you probably didn’t even remember me,” she choked a laugh, the sound coming out more sad than she intended it.

Their bond was exclusive to this place. She didn’t have what Kara had with Alex, and that was fine and expected – it wasn’t a competition, she didn’t need it to be, she’d lose anyway – but she had missed her too, and this moment made her realize just how much. Catra remembered the day her name showed up on the disappearance notification, and how she’d been told that there was a letter left for her.

She had mourned losing Richie and Dan, but Alex was a grief she just shoved down and concealed with anger. People came and went. Catra wasn’t a stranger to feeling like she was left behind.

“I made a whole ass person while you were gone,” she whispered, still hugging.

Alex couldn’t argue with that. At home, she had no idea Vallo existed. She had no idea she’d had a life here, with her sister’s girlfriend of all people. She had no idea who Catra was, even though she was someone so important to her here. She hadn’t even seen a real-life cat-person before (although she could easily be convinced they existed, with the aliens she knew existed out there in their universe, and in the multiverse as a whole).

But as soon as she’d gotten ahold of herself again, Catra was the first person she asked about. Thankfully, Kara had been all too happy to fill her in on what she’d missed, assuring her that she’d stepped in to make sure Catra still had a Danvers sister in her life. She hated that she’d been taken away and missed such a momentous occasion in Catra’s life, but she was glad her sister had been there for her. That, in an odd way, the sisterhood had connected all three of them now.

She pulled back and cupped Catra’s face in her hands, just for a moment, so she could look at her properly. “You made a person,” she repeated. “Finn?”

Blargh, was it necessary to look at her face? Catra didn’t think so but she allowed it anyway. Her eyes were a bit watery, and the way she pressed her lips together, like she was working hard to keep them from trembling, was a sign that she needed a moment before attempting words again.

The nod to her question was at least an answer.

Catra pulled away to attend to Finn briefly, stopping the swing from its motions to unbuckle them safely with a quiet, “come here, baby.” They’d built up a lot of neck strength but she insisted on offering them some support to keep their head up regardless, holding them upright in her arms and close to her chest. “This is the auntie I was telling you about,” she whispered and kissed Finn’s ear.

They were a decent sleeper for their age, but sometimes they were wide awake and she’d be up with them, talking to them, telling them stories as if Finn could understand and absorb it into memory. She talked to them about the princesses, about their planet, about all the people they loved here and lost.

Finn gnawed on their fingers, looking at Alex with big eyes.

Alex gazed at Finn with awe in her eyes. She’d met them once before, back when the first timeslip had happened and she and Lena had been greeted with a child of their own. But they were bigger then and wild in that way only little children could be. This version of them was brand new – an adorable infant with tiny perked-up ears and tiny eyes that matched their mommy’s blue – and her heart absolutely melted when she looked at them.

“Hi there, little one,” she greeted them, crouching a bit so she could be level with the baby’s eyeline. “I’m so glad I get to meet you. I know your moms were really hoping to meet you soon when I was here last.”

She didn’t know the ins and outs of how Finn had come about (and didn’t want to, thank you), but she knew there hadn’t been any active trying that either of them mentioned. But Vallo had a way of making dreams come true when it wanted. Finn, she assumed, was a product of just that.

Finn made a sound that was utter and complete nonsense. Catra considered it to be the cutest thing, always. “Adora wasted no time,” was her retort to that, an amused little snort that helped keep the tears away. She sat on the mat since her legs felt a little bit like jelly thanks to the fact that this was real, it’s happening, Alex was back.

“When did you–Kara must have lost her shit, huh,” she sniffed and laughed, angling Finn to settle more into the crook of her arms so they could just stare at Alex. “God, are you okay? I know a lot has changed since–the last time.” Her and Lena had been an item, and now she came back to see her (former, at this point) girlfriend with her sister?

It had to be weird. Catra was always good at minding her own business, and she knew that the entire thing was complicated and context mattered – but there was a (protective?) part of her that just wished Lena would have waited for Alex.

Alex followed suit and sat down on the other end of the mat, legs splaying out onto the grass. She reached out to playfully tickle the baby’s foot, smiling as she watched them watch her for a minute. They had such an intense gaze, looking at her like she was the most fascinating creature they’d ever seen; she couldn’t help but grin in response. But she shifted her gaze back to Catra after a moment, that grin shifting to a softer smile.

“A lot has changed,” she agreed. “But I’m okay. More than okay, I promise.” She appreciated her sister’s protectiveness, as someone who had witnessed her relationship with Lena during her time here, but she was sincere in her reassurance. “I love Lena. I did then, I do now. But I knew even then that this – Lena and Kara – is how it’s supposed to be. You can love someone without the prospect of forever, you know?”

At the time, being with Lena had been what she wanted. The Vallo part of her would always love her, even if that part was concealed away when she was at home. She’d been happy to plan a life with Lena and would have been happy if they’d lived out their days together here uninterrupted. But it hadn’t worked out that way, and that was fine with her. It was just a sign that there were bigger things at play, that whatever world they were in, the inevitable was Lena and Kara.

“I’m happy at home, too,” she went on. “And so are they. Together, like they should be.”

Catra couldn’t say she related. She didn’t need to, in the scheme of things – relationships varied and they couldn’t be compared. If Adora was whisked away from Vallo and Catra was left behind, she’d wait forever. There wasn’t room for anyone else but her. And if Alex was okay, and the three of them were happy with the outcome and how things unfolded, then she could just be comfortably happy for them.

“Okay,” she acquiesced, searching Alex’s face for any telltale signs of bullshit. Catra found none. She didn’t look distressed, or worried. “I know you’re married back home and everything with a kid of your own, so - tell me the details? Are they here too, or just you? I want everything, you asshole.”

Alex chuckled and looked skyward for a moment, like she was considering what to tell Catra, her mouth twisted into a playful smile all the while. She was genuinely a little torn on what she wanted to reveal; a year that she’d been sure was going to be one of the best of her life had turned out much differently than she’d expected, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to shatter that illusion.

“My daughter is here,” was what she revealed first. “We ended up at L-Corp together. Her name’s Esme, she’s six. She’s excitable, so I thought dropping in on you and baby over here might be better alone the first time. But I’d love to bring her over to meet you soon.”

Alex had a daughter. Fuck, she’s known that – it wasn’t news – but it still hit Catra with a degree of awe. Finn fussed lightly in her arms, and she soothed them by offering the pacifier attached to their shirt. “As if that’s even a question,” she huffed. “I worked at an art camp with a lot of kids when I was pregnant with Finn, I have a bunch of stuff here she can come play with.”

She might have become a hoarder of art supplies in the past several months, and they might also have, like, eight molds of Finn’s hands and feet (she had a set to put in Adora’s office for decor, was that weird?) and over fifty paintbrushes. She was ready. “Is she settling in okay? I know it helps to have people she knows around but, y’know–multiversal hopping. What about her other mom?”

Alex looked vaguely surprised at the art camp reveal, but it passed quickly. That first timeslip with little kid Finn had proven what a hover mom Catra could be and shown that she was good at handling kids. It was good to hear she’d been able to combine her love at art with helping out little ones like that. It was fitting for her, and Alex loved the idea.

“She’s doing good. She was in the foster system back home, and she’s seen a lot of not-great things, so this is nothing comparatively. She’s tough. But having Kara and Lena was definitely a big selling point.”

If it wasn’t for them, she couldn’t have made this trip out to see Catra on her own. She knew the two of them were just as thrilled to spoil the little girl and hype her up on sugar after months of missing her while here.

“Kelly isn’t here,” she continued. With a half-hearted smile, she admitted, “We’re separated back home, actually.”

“Can’t say I’m surprised,” Catra told her, gently, not to be rude or anything. There’d been a few conversations about Kelly and her realization of loving her but not being in love with her. “But like you said, you’re–happy at home, right? I’m hoping it’s all amicable and whatnot.”

And hopefully things weren’t too hard or complicated for them. From what she gathered, Esme was theirs - so co-parenting had to presumably be a thing.

“Yeah, it is,” Alex said with a nod. “It’s still tough, but there’s no resentment that I can see. And Esme has been pretty agreeable to go back and forth between us.” None of it had been easy, of course – separating under a year after their big wedding day was going to be sucky no matter the circumstances. But Kelly wasn’t the type of person to hold grudges, even at her most hurt. It was one of the thing Alex truly did love about her.

“I know you’ve heard it before, but I jumped too fast on the first person that showed me interest. It’s not that Kelly isn’t wonderful, but she was just–” She sighed, reaching out to fiddle gently with Finn’s toes again. “She was an opportunity to be loved again after I’d lost Maggie, but it never felt right on that level. I just hoped that it would if I kept trying.”

“At least you figured that out early,” Catra supplied. “I think it takes people years sometimes.” Then she imagined it’d just be too hard to get out of. It was disappointing that things didn’t pan out as a ‘happily ever after’ with the person she chose to marry - but life was weird, and who gave a shit if people deviated from the ‘traditional formula’ (at least in Earth-American terms) as long as you were happy with the now.

Finn began to purr up a tiny little storm against her, suckling on the pacifier contently. Their eyes hadn’t really left Alex – it was kind of like they were still trying to figure her out. “Where are you even staying? Kara? Morningside??”

The comfort was appreciated and Alex accepted it with a gentle bump of her shoulder against Catra’s. It hadn’t been easy to admit, especially knowing it would hurt a person she truly did love, but Catra was right. It was better to have sorted it out early – maybe not as early as would be ideal, but better than years into a marriage where the spark just wasn’t there. She though Kelly appreciated that part, too.

“I was forbidden to go to Morningside,” she chuckled. “Kara held onto me for a solid twenty minutes before I convinced her to let me sit down.” The fondness for her little sister was clear in her voice. She was in no way upset by that greeting, and really, she would have been disappointed if she’d gotten anything less. “Esme and I got to take over one of the penthouse guest rooms. She’s trying to befriend Mermista with an excessive amount of treats. It’s her goal in life right now.”

“Oh, she’ll achieve that goal then. Your sister’s whipped by that cat. Like, she takes time out of her day to give her tiny snacks like the sucker she is.” Catra rolled her eyes. “Food’s the way to that chonk’s heart. But, god, please bring her by. Esme – not Merms, obviously. I got another telepathic cat and she had cubs and they’re really fun, Alex.”

And friendly. They’d been handled by hands since they were newborns, and they had an awareness that feral animals just didn’t. They were pretty amazing.

“You got another psychic cat?” Alex questioned, brows raising in surprise. “Not just Melog?” She looked over at the shapeshifter, sitting attentively beside Catra with their mane a nice, neutral blue, picturing another one just like them. “When did that happen? I want all the life updates from you now, please.”

“Uhhhh, god, maybe – last November? Almost a year.” Catra scrunched her nose up in thought, trying to remember. It wasn’t long after her birthday. “Pink lion from a planet in our universe. Her name’s Clawdeen and I know, Alex, I know. The name. I didn’t pick it. Anyway, I don’t know if you remember Cringer but they started having this affair and the cubs weren’t planned, it was a whole little mini-drama. I don’t know her from back home, though.”

And she still didn’t call her by her name, either. Catra stopped trying to correct her. If she kept insisting on calling her C’yra, that was just a battle that she had to accept that she lost.

Alex did snicker just a bit at that name because come on, it was a little silly. But they faded out as Catra went on to explain the situation with the Cringer, Clawdeen, and these cubs that had resulted from their messy union. She was sorry she’d missed it; she couldn’t picture the Cringer she’d known having relationship drama, never mind being a father.

“Maybe she knows a multiversal version of you,” she offered as an explanation. “There could be a million yous out there, and she just happened to end up here, where you’re the wrong one.”

“Please don’t,” Catra sighed, having already thought about that possibility too and it gave her a headache. What she could do to narrow down the list of theories is search deeper through Darla’s archives – she knew the name of the planet was nagging at her brain anyway. She’d been connected to Horde Prime’s hivemind, and sometimes the name of something would trigger information that was downloaded in her brain from that connection.

But she was still playing the card of willful and blissful ignorance when it came to her people, their history, culture, all of it. Most of what she did know involved biology, and that was for the sake of knowing what to expect for Finn. Humans were well-known and studied. Magicats, though?

A lot less well-known.

“I think Esme will have fun staying here,” she said, switching the subject. “And I’m happy to babysit if the three of you ever want some adult time to hang out. Adora’s awesome with kids. You should have seen her wrangle like fifteen of them for me–it was very hot.”

Alex flashed an apologetic smile and easily let the subject drop. She knew it was a lot for most people to wrap their minds around, even after ending up in a place like Vallo. She’d had years to get used to the idea of the multiverse being real, so it didn’t faze her as much anymore to think about there being a million other Alexs out there.

It was still kind of weird, but she had accepted it at this point. She’d seen a multiverse fall and a multiverse rise. It was hard not to think about and acknowledge.

“I might take you up on that. She’d love to see Darla. But in the meantime.” Alex wiggled her fingers gently across Finn’s belly. “Do you think Auntie Alex can hold the cutest baby in the whole world?”

“Oh!” Catra hadn’t offered Finn to her at all, had she? Whoops. “Duh, yeah, sorry, here.” The baby was transferred carefully into Alex’s arms, and Finn seemed okay with it–for now. Alex was definitely a new kind of smell for them, and the only noises that came from them was the suckling of the pacifier.

And a little bit of baby gas, but hey. What do you expect?

“They have Adora’s forehead,” she whispered fondly, smitten as can be. “I’d kill for them.”

Alex did her best to make sure Finn was settled comfortably. They were still looking at her like the weirdest thing they’d ever seen, but she was a new person. She knew it was to be expected. She was just happy to get to see them this little, and boy, they were so tiny. The side they brought out of her sister, though, was a side Alex was glad to see.

“Part of the mom package,” she chuckled, gently smoothing one hand across Finn’s hair. It was already a little wild, but she knew Catra’s had been untamable as a kid, too. “Here’s hoping you never have to go that far.”

“Hah, I almost did,” Catra retorted with a roll of her eyes. “C’mon, let’s go inside – I’ll be a good host and offer lemonade or some shit, and tell you about how I almost maimed a shapeshiftng-person-asshole for kidnapping Finn in Teela’s skin.”

There was a lot to catch Alex up on anyway, and she knew there were more details to hear from her time back home. Her little schedule could take the interruption happily.