WHERE: Vallo Forest: Kogane Cabin WHEN: February 20th, 2023: 2AM WHAT: In the middle of the night, Kipp comes into Shiro's and Keith's lives in an unexpected way. WARNINGS: NPC Death, Parental Loss STATUS: Complete
By the time they had gotten home with the sleeping toddler, the shock still hadn’t worn off for Keith. It was all just so unbelievable and his nerves felt like they were on fire from the news that they had received. Zia and Zephyr were gone and their son was now their responsibility.
Kipp was now their responsibility.
They had, of course, known that Kipp would be coming to them relatively soon, but their Kipp from the future had been very sparse on the details and rightfully so. If they had any idea that their fae friends were going to die so suddenly, they would have done more to try and prevent their deaths. They would have fought the fates themselves to make sure that Kipp still had them.
Because as much as they desperately wanted him in their lives, it wasn’t at the cost of two very good friends who had been doing so much for others. They had just had dinner with them the other night. Zeph had helped Keith weatherproof the back patio last week. They knew of their son, had even met him briefly at a dinner at the fae couple’s home, before he had been shuffled off to bed, but they hadn’t called him Kipp in front of them. He didn’t yet look like the young man they had met.
One minute, everything was fine and life was going on as usual. And then just like that, there were two people shaped holes in all of their lives.
This wasn’t how Keith wanted this to happen. Not by a longshot.
He watched as Shiro gently deposited the sleeping fae child onto the huge bed that made up a good chunk of their master bedroom. It was Shiro sized, so Kipp looked comically small as he slumbered on peacefully, still not fully understanding what was going on. He was young, too young, to really grasp the situation and for that Keith was both gratefully and desperately upset, as a part of his soul resonated with the loss that Kipp was experiencing. At least Keith had memories of his father. What would Kipp have, being this young?
A flimsy will, naming Keith and Shiro Kipp’s guardians because the case worker said that Zia and Zephyr apparently were no longer close to their families.
“This isn’t fair,” Keith whispered, voice thick with emotion as he tried to keep his grief and anger in check. His hands were fisted at his sides as he took a deep, shuddering breath to try and keep the tears he could feel prickling at his eyes in check. “This isn’t right.”
"Hey..hey, come here," Shiro whispered, pulling Keith into his arms. He rested his head on Keith's hair, trying to push his own heartsickness somewhere useful. They had Kipp somewhere safe. They would make sure he was well cared for and protected. They'd love him - they already loved him but now they could get to know him from the start, watch him grow and become the adult they knew.
It had all happened so fast. Realizing the child of their friends was Kipp, losing those friends to tragedy, finding out those friends had no one they trusted to take their son if - when - the worst came to pass.
"It isn't fair," he agreed, quiet and somber. He rubbed soothing circles into Keith's back just like he'd been doing to Kipp when the toddler fell asleep in his arms. His own voice was heavy with emotion held barely in check for the sake of his husband and Kipp. "It isn't right. We can't change it. But we can do right by him. I know we'll do right by him."
Keith, long used to having to hide the vulnerable parts of himself away, tried to compose himself. It wasn't fair to Kipp or Shiro to fall apart now. Getting called down to the DOA where child services and Vallo PD had been waiting for them with Kipp, had forced him to stow all his emotions until he knew what was going on. And as it was explained to them what happened, with a gradual rising horror coming over them with the reality of the situation they now found themselves in, he still managed to keep it together. Keith wouldn't show vulnerability in front of strangers. Not in this instance.
But in his husband's arms, he knew he could finally let himself grieve the loss of their friends. He had grown used to letting himself feel his emotions with Shiro protecting him from outside forces. Yet, still he stubbornly refused to let those tears fall because he knew in his heart that Shiro was feeling the same pain he was.
Hearing the reassuring words, he blinked back the tears again and threw his arms around Shiro. Squeezing his husband, he vowed into the older man's chest, "He won't grow up like I did. He'll have so much love he won't know what to do with it." Pulling back to look at Shiro in the eyes, he tried for a smile that came off more brittle than he would have liked. "We can be strong for him."
“There’s no one stronger than you,” Shiro said. He was biased, of course. But he’d watched Keith save him over and over with the kind of conviction that most people could only wish they had. He kissed the corner of Keith’s mouth and nuzzled against his cheek. “There’s no one with a bigger heart. We’ll keep him safe and loved and we’ll keep everything his parents wanted him to have safe too.”
He knew he’d have the ugly parts of surprise death to take care of soon – paperwork and burial arrangements and legal red tape. It would have to start tomorrow. It was very late and they were lucky the powers that be had even let them take Kipp tonight. Shiro glanced back over his shoulder to confirm Kipp was still sleeping and then he took Keith’s hand and pulled him towards the dresser.
“Let’s change into sleep clothes and lay down, okay? I need to just…I…” He breathed out unsteadily. “I just want to hold you close and keep an eye on him.”
Seeing Shiro in any kind of distress or upset always brought out Keith’s more protective side. For better or for worse, he was always able to push his own concerns and feelings aside when it came to taking care of Shiro. It was selfish, in a way, but he could figure his own shit out later or bury it deep enough to never have to deal with it again.
Shiro needed him and he would be there for him. Reaching out to hold both of Shiro’s hand and squeezing both tightly, only the flesh one giving, he nodded. “We can absolutely do that. Let’s take care of you and then we can work on taking care of us all starting tomorrow.” Because the other man was right. Nothing could be down now and it would have to wait until tomorrow and Keith could be okay with that.
Tomorrow might be another story, but that was tomorrow’s problem.
He started to pull out their pajamas. Noises from their bed, shuffling and resettling of a tiny body, sounded that drew his attention, but he breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that Kipp was still asleep. He smiled warily at Shiro. “Guess we’re going to be jumping at every noise for awhile, huh?”
Shiro had glanced over just as quickly, halfway into sweatpants and feeling like his hands were tied by clumsiness. The adrenaline of the initial call and everything that had followed was finally wearing off. What was left was numbness and worry.
"I think so," he murmured, watching Kipp for a moment before he continued to dress for bed. "Everything's changed. I know we were ready, but it's still a shock to know this is it now. We have a child." His brow furrowed. "Assuming the fae don't make any trouble about the will. I'll talk to a lawyer in the morning. But first we need to pick up some of his clothes and his favorite foods. We'll need to find out if he has any allergies. He's never mentioned any to us as an adult but better safe than sorry. And we should probably talk to a child psychologist…"
The words were muffled as he pulled a shirt over his head and the pause made him realize he was rambling. He breathed out a steadying breath and gave Keith a somber smile. "Sorry. My thoughts are going a million miles an hour."
Keith was slower to dress, as his attention on Kipp was slowly transferred to Shiro as he started to ramble. He felt a rush of warmth in his heart, brought on by Shiro's amazing ability to be capable in this situation and, honestly, every situation he ever seemed to find himself in.
His brain to mouth filter was always a little broken, but especially in the face of Shiro's competency. So he blamed that for the words that came out of his mouth next: "Don't be sorry. I wish I had someone like you to give a shit when my dad first died." And then he startled, realizing what he said and how similar his own story was to Kipp’s.
Oh well, nothing left to do but double down. "It would have been a lot easier to have known someone out there still cared about me and was worried enough to figure that all out. So don't be sorry," here Keith's own voice was muffled as he pulled his sleep shirt on. When his face appeared again, hair sticking every which way, he added, "I think I get why Zia and Zeph picked us now."
Keith’s words weren’t entirely unexpected – Shiro knew all of this had to be hitting especially hard for someone who was orphaned young. But hearing it said out loud was an arrow straight to the heart. He waited for Keith to pull his shirt down before he reached out to cradle Keith’s face between his hands.
“I wish so badly someone had been there for you, the way you needed.” Shiro knew he came along eventually, a friend and a confidant, someone to help Keith find his own way out of the dark. But he’d been a teenager with goals of his own, not an adult who could and should have put Keith first. “But I’m relieved Kipp will never know that isolation and uncertainty.” He dipped forward to kiss Keith and then took his hand, threading his metal fingers through Keith’s. “I figured they picked us for a lot of the same reasons Black picked us. But now that you mention it, your history probably played a part. I know they appreciated that you knew what it was like to be part human and part something else too.”
Aw shit, there were those tears again. Keith did his best to blink them away, annoyed with himself to even think about himself at this moment. This was about Kipp and Shiro and them as a family unit. It wasn’t about his past trauma with being orphaned and being let down by the very systems that were supposed to help him. He sucked in a quick breath to try and calm his emotions again, but his face crumpled when Shiro tried to soothe those old wounds with his words.
Life kind of had a way of making up for all the crap, by letting him have this with Shiro. There was no one else he wanted to take this journey and deal with whatever life threw at them, than Shiro.
Accepting that kiss with absolutely no reluctance and sniffling as Shiro threaded their fingers together, he said, “I think your overly competent self and stupidly large heart had more than a little to do with it too. Never met anyone that cared about people as deeply as you do, Shiro.” Closing his eyes, he thumped his head against Shiro’s chest and wrapped his arms around him. “No one else I’d want to do this with, you know. There’s no one else I would trust as much.”
Shiro's emotions were hardwired to Keith's and the way his face crumpled made Shiro's do the same. He pressed his face into Keith's hair and breathed deep, looping his arms around his husband's shoulders.
"The size of my heart is thanks to you, you know. Your passion and your loyalty and your incredible determination." He smoothed a hand over Keith's wild hair. "I wouldn't want to do this with anyone else either. It's you and me, always. Well, you and me and that little guy snoring in the bed now." Kipp shuffled a little as if he knew he was being talked about and then made a sad sound that tore at Shiro's insides. He pulled Keith towards the bed, lowering his voice to a whisper. "Come on. Maybe it'll comfort him to have us on either side of him? I don't know if they slept like that with him but…we can see how it goes?"
Judging by the look on Shiro's face, he felt the same as Keith did when he heard the sad little noises. Life wasn't fair, Keith thought again bitterly. But letting himself be pulled along by his husband toward the young fae that would be their son one day, he knew they would get through this whole.
Without words, he nodded as he got into bed from what was normally his side of the bed. He watched Shiro do the same, before reaching over the sleeping Kipp to hold Shiro's hand once he was settled.
Sleep might not come right away, but at least they all had each other now. "Love you," he directed the whisper at Shiro, before shifting his gaze down to Kipp’s sleeping face. "And we love you too."
Shiro climbed into bed and reached for Keith at the same time as Keith reached for him. It all felt like the most natural thing in the world - somber and heartbreaking, but still as easy as breathing. He knew fatherhood wouldn't be easy. Not with the way it was starting and not with Vallo always throwing a wrench in things. But this part, the love he felt and the fierce resolve to do whatever he had to in order to protect and nurture his growing family, that part wasn't hard at all.
"I love you too, so much," Shiro whispered back, using their tethered hands to smooth some of Kipp's hair off his forehead. "Both of you."
He thought for sure that sleep would be impossible, but mental and emotional exhaustion swept him under in a matter of moments. The last thing he remembered was Kosmo teleporting into the room nearly silently and laying at the end of the bed like a third wall of defense. Kipp was as safe as he could get.