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Loki Odinson ([info]maybesnake) wrote in [info]valarnet,
@ 2019-02-04 12:09:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:!trigger warning, chase stein (talkback), finn mikaelson, loki odinson, mary poppins, rose tyler

[Blocked from Thor]

I had one of those not-dreams last night. There was a time when I actually wished they would happen. I felt left out. And then... I don't know what changed. I began to dread them. Maybe because so many of them sounded so unpleasant, and the pessimist in me expected that unpleasantness would inevitably find me, as well. I hate that I was right, and even still, it was more upsetting than I could possibly imagine.

Why am I writing about it here? Because it's what everyone else does? Because I need a cathartic experience? It's like a wet, icy blanket that I cannot shake off.



Imagine an infant left out in a blizzard, so that the elements can just have at him, and he's no longer anyone's concern, because he's a runt, deformed; it's horrific. But what if you are the infant, and you keep screaming for someone. You don't understand what's happening, but you need rescuing, because it's freezing and you are terrified, but no one's coming. This family that you had for a few minutes, they've just... left you there to die.


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[info]bansheecries
2019-02-04 05:46 pm UTC (link)
That is probably the most horrific dream I've heard so far because it's an infant. A lot of us are lucky to dream of ourselves old enough to be able to care/defend ourselves... But an infant? That's just... I'm sorry that was your first dream.

[Private]

I'm so sorry you had to dream that last night.

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[Private]
[info]maybesnake
2019-02-05 01:47 am UTC (link)
To have no idea what's going on, because an infant can't understand, that was the hardest part.

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[Private]
[info]bansheecries
2019-02-05 01:49 am UTC (link)
What can I do?

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[Private]
[info]maybesnake
2019-02-06 11:42 pm UTC (link)
Don't worry about me. I'll be fine.

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[Private]
[info]bansheecries
2019-02-07 12:52 am UTC (link)
That's like me telling you not to worry about me. Not happening.

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[Private]
[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 01:27 am UTC (link)
I think I've gotten everything out that I need to say. I don't desire to talk about it much.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

[Private]
[info]bansheecries
2019-02-12 01:29 am UTC (link)
Let's go out to eat then. Get your mind off of the dreams.

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[Private]
[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 01:32 am UTC (link)
All right. Where?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

[Private]
[info]bansheecries
2019-02-12 01:35 am UTC (link)
Well, what's your favorite thing to eat?

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[Private]
[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 02:14 pm UTC (link)
Sushi

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: [Private]
[info]bansheecries
2019-02-12 02:52 pm UTC (link)
Sushi sounds great! We'll get some tonight and walk the beach after?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: [Private]
[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 06:15 pm UTC (link)
That sounds nice.

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[Private]
[info]bansheecries
2019-02-12 06:16 pm UTC (link)
Good, we'll do that. I'll look for a place for us tonight.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]_badwolf_
2019-02-04 11:25 pm UTC (link)
Bloody hell, that's some first dream you had. Sorry mate.

At least they're just dreams, yeah?

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-05 01:45 am UTC (link)
I don't know what they are, but I don't think anyone believe's they're just dreams.

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[info]_badwolf_
2019-02-05 01:53 am UTC (link)
But they're not quite real either.

It's like this strange in-between.

I hope your dreams get better though! I mean...if this is just the start, then that means you're going to be rescued!

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-06 11:43 pm UTC (link)
I should, but I wish the dream had no ended so abruptly.

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[info]_badwolf_
2019-02-09 03:18 am UTC (link)
Was it just you lying out in the cold?

I guess this'll be one of the rare times I wish you have another dream soon!

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 01:28 am UTC (link)
There didn't seem to be anyone else around.

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[info]_badwolf_
2019-02-13 04:15 am UTC (link)
Do you remember the dream as the child or like you were watching a movie and you knew the baby was you?

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-13 12:42 pm UTC (link)
While I was dreaming, I was in the perspective of the child, but once I woke, it felt more like I could understand better what had happened.

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[info]_badwolf_
2019-02-13 07:51 pm UTC (link)
Mine seem to go back and forth. Like, sometimes I dream like I'm me in it, from my point of view.

Sometimes it seems more like a movie I'm watching of myself.

So, like, once you woke up you were able to comprehend more since you weren't thinking as a baby does?

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[info]prac_perfect
2019-02-04 11:26 pm UTC (link)
Dear heavens! That's quite a dream to have, if not just to start off! I'm truly sorry that you had to have that.

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-05 01:45 am UTC (link)
Yes, if that's how it begins, I don't really want to know where it leads. I assume I survive. I don't know how.

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[info]prac_perfect
2019-02-05 01:56 am UTC (link)
Perhaps the beginning is just the downcurve to your life.

It will only go up from here!

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-06 11:44 pm UTC (link)
That's assuming a lot, I think.

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[info]prac_perfect
2019-02-09 03:19 am UTC (link)
Perhaps.

Better than wallowing in our own remorse and sadness, however. That doesn't do well at all. Better to think positively and move forward and focus on the things we do have control of.

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 01:30 am UTC (link)
I've always been more of a pessimist realist. Focusing on what you can control is always wise, but positivity doesn't mean all that much.

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[info]prac_perfect
2019-02-13 04:20 am UTC (link)
You can't mean that!

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-13 12:44 pm UTC (link)
What? So that you feel better? That's fine when things are rosy. But when you need to think your way out of a problem, it's better to assume nothing will go as you expect.

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[info]prac_perfect
2019-02-13 07:52 pm UTC (link)
I suppose I can understand that logic. To be prepared for the worst in case it happens.

Still, that seems like it could be awfully lonely disheartening at times.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]finninabox
2019-02-05 03:04 am UTC (link)
And I thought the dreams of my childhood were problematic. I'm sorry you had to dream of something like that.

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-06 11:44 pm UTC (link)
What happen in yours, if you don't mind my asking.

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[Filtered from Mikaelsons]
[info]finninabox
2019-02-11 01:36 am UTC (link)
If we're starting from the beginning, my older sister was taken by our aunt so our mother told our father that she died. When my father found out my mother'd had an affair, he constantly took it out on my younger brother who was the product of said affair then when my youngest brother was killed by werewolves, my father had my mother, who was a witch, make us immortal, which resulted in us becoming the first vampires.

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[Filtered from Mikaelsons]
[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 01:31 am UTC (link)
You don't happen to be acquainted with Lydia Martin, do you?

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[Filtered from Mikaelsons]
[info]finninabox
2019-02-12 02:17 am UTC (link)
No, I don't know anyone named Lydia.

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[Filtered from Mikaelsons]
[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 02:15 pm UTC (link)
Just curious. Something sounded similar.

I am sorry about your family drama. That's a complicated and unfortunate story.

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[Filtered from Mikaelsons]
[info]finninabox
2019-02-19 03:09 am UTC (link)
I'm curious, which part was it?

I'm only glad that our real life upbringing wasn't quite as problematic. Not that we had an ideal one either.

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[info]psychicraptor
2019-02-06 12:38 am UTC (link)
And I thought my family in the Dreams was fucked up.

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-06 11:45 pm UTC (link)
And I thought my waking family was.

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[info]psychicraptor
2019-02-11 04:44 am UTC (link)
Sorry you had to dream that. There definitely needs to be a skip or fast forward option for these things.

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[info]maybesnake
2019-02-12 01:32 am UTC (link)
Yes, I'd prefer to select from some sort of menu.

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[info]psychicraptor
2019-02-13 04:19 am UTC (link)
Or at least have a box to check to pass on screwed up families.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

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