InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Feel the burn"

Neena Thurman is getting too old for this shit (godplaysdice) wrote in valarnet,
@ 2018-11-03 15:01:00

Entry tags:

jaina proudmoore, logan howlett (wolverine), neena thurman (domino), yondu udonta

Welp. Gonna need a new Roomba. Mine's got a knife in it, but it seriously had that shit coming. I thought Chickens were terrifying and it was probably one of the few things in life that actually scared the hell out of me, but now we can add 'my automatic carpet cleaner coming to life and trying to kill me' to the list.

It twitched for a bit after I knifed it so I emptied a magazine into it just to be safe. I'm kind of surprised my neighbors didn't call the cops over that one.

Anyway it's been dead for a few days and my microwave finally stopped getting stuck at odd seconds, so I guess this new brand of crazy is over?

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	the_wolverine 2018-11-03 07:15 pm UTC (link)
	I'm never letting you live down the chickens thing. But I'll pick you up a new Roomba. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-03 08:25 pm UTC (link)
	They just STARE at you, Logan. What do they WANT? Thanks. Kind of hard to keep the place as clean as I'd like it without one, but can you stick around after we get it charged to make sure it doesn't go nuts on me again? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_wolverine 2018-11-03 11:12 pm UTC (link)
	They want to eat. Sometimes pets. Yeah I can hang around, darlin' (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-04 07:29 am UTC (link)
	You can't pet a chicken, Logan. That's when they BITE you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_wolverine 2018-11-04 10:02 am UTC (link)
	Show me on the doll where the chicken touched you (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-14 11:04 pm UTC (link)
	It didn't HAVE to touch me, it was terrifying before then. Well, actually, I'm okay with them now. Kind of. Yondu took me to meet little chicks once and that part was nice. But they still grow up into assholes, okay. Assholes that stare at you and walk towards you slowly and can peck your eyes out at any moment. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_wolverine 2018-11-14 11:11 pm UTC (link)
	What if you raised one from a chick? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-28 02:42 am UTC (link)
	It's still gonna stare at me, Logan. I don't think I can train a chick not to stare at me like that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_wolverine 2018-11-28 02:47 am UTC (link)
	I'm gettin' ideas... (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-28 03:05 am UTC (link)
	I'm not sure I even want you to share. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	lord_admiral 2018-11-03 07:16 pm UTC (link)
	..chickens? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-03 08:26 pm UTC (link)
	Chickens. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lord_admiral 2018-11-03 11:14 pm UTC (link)
	What did they do to you? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-04 07:30 am UTC (link)
	Mostly they stare. They stare at you a lot. It's creepy. But also they bite. And they peck. And they make NOISES. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lord_admiral 2018-11-04 10:05 am UTC (link)
	I once met a champion of the Alliance in my dreams, who clucked at a chicken for twenty minutes. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-14 11:05 pm UTC (link)
	Why the fuck would any 'champion' waste their time clucking at a chicken? There has to be a story about this, right? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lord_admiral 2018-11-14 11:12 pm UTC (link)
	The chicken started to follow her around. Like it imprinted. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-28 02:57 am UTC (link)
	So this is some kind of horror story, then? (Reply to this) (Parent)

	captainpoppins 2018-11-03 10:50 pm UTC (link)
	Damn, woman. It's a Roomba. Don't those things like get stuck in corners and shit? What's it gonna do, nibble your toes? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-04 07:31 am UTC (link)
	A few days ago it was chasing me around, climbing my chair, and trying to vacuum my face clean off. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainpoppins 2018-11-04 11:47 pm UTC (link)
	Holy shit. ~~Don't laugh, don't laugh~~ Well I'm glad you're okay, chica. Shame you're still scared of chickens though. Thought maybe we'd taken care of that with that trip to the farm that time. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-14 11:06 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah, I'm honestly still pretty fucking traumatized. I had to check all my other appliances to make sure none of those were going to try and kill me next. Chicks are still okay, you got me that far. It's just... they grow up, Yondu. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainpoppins 2018-11-28 01:12 am UTC (link)
	I don't blame ya one bit. I'd've done the same. Probably have holes in all my stuff. Heh. True. Guess I shouldn't show you that video a buddy of mine sent me of this breed of chicken that's the biggest damm one I've ever seen. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-28 03:02 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, I really don't need to be looking at any chickens that are the biggest damned ones we ever saw. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainpoppins 2018-11-29 05:14 am UTC (link)
	Like foghorn leghorn heh. At least you'd eat like a king for a month on that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-30 09:07 am UTC (link)
	Jesus, That guy's just an asshole in a chicken costume as far as I'm concerned. ... But I mean if he IS really a chicken? I don't know, Yondu. I make it a point not to eat anything that can talk back. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	onlygoodvibes 2018-11-04 02:58 am UTC (link)
	The dead Roomba makes me sad fyi. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-04 07:32 am UTC (link)
	This one had a taste for human flesh, I think we can be a little less sad about its death. I'm sure most Roombas are really nice and don't want to murder their owners at all? Up until recently mine was an angel. Reminds me of all those sci fi stories where the robots get fed up and decided human life is irrelevant. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	onlygoodvibes 2018-11-04 08:30 am UTC (link)
	Yeahh guess a little less. But I still love tech, even if it tried to lock me in my own apartment. Most of them just want to clean your floor and eat dust. I blame skynet. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	godplaysdice 2018-11-14 11:07 pm UTC (link)
	So I guess you'd come up with some sort of no-kill option for tech that misbehaved? What would that even look like? An EMP bomb I guess? Shit, if Skynet is real we're in a lot of trouble. (Reply to this) (Parent)