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Tweak says, "Exactomundolelo!"

Eighth Doctor [AU] (on_comingstorm) wrote in utr_logs,
@ 2008-08-21 20:28:00

Entry tags:

eighth doctor (au), sarah jane smith

Who: Eight and Sarah Jane
Where: St. Agnes Cemetery, London
When: Thursday evening
Why: Remembering an old friend
Rating: TBD

The Doctor hadn't even known about this. Then again, he hadn't actually checked up on Harry or Sarah Jane since their departures from each other's presence years ago. But Sarah had asked him to take her there, and he had noticed she'd been acting strangely all day. He thought it'd just been because of what had transpired recently between them but the two of them had kind of just let that go for now.

In the main room, he'd turned dials and flipped switches, sending the TARDIS on its way towards their destination as she'd requested, and so he'd settled back in his chair just until they'd landed.

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dontcallmesj
2008-08-22 12:45 am UTC (link)

Sarah still didn't get why she was the one that had to examine her feelings. Except she'd admitted she didn't want to be alone and he hadn't said a word. She crossed her arms in front of her chest almost in protest and shrugged her shoulders dismissively again. "It felt... better. I mean I like it, obviously.. is that enough though?"

She finally looked back up at him, almost hopefully but trying not to make it seem like she was. "Is that what you want? If it's what we both want.." she trailed off. Neither of them seemed to want to admit it. "We're both scared of being hurt, I know that.. I wouldn't hurt you."

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on_comingstorm
2008-08-22 12:59 am UTC (link)

Since when had the Doctor been one to discuss his feelings? Hadn't he always been the one to pick apart a situation to the barest bones until he heard what he'd wanted to know? "Of course you liked it. But will there eventually come a point when that won't be enough?" He didn't know the answer to that. Sarah Jane wasn't in love with him and he wasn't in love with her. Yet.

"I am probably bound to hurt you, though. I do not have the most amazing track record. We're both stubborn and in pain and we fight but...we work well together and know how to handle each other. It's a strange relationship we have."

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dontcallmesj
2008-08-22 01:08 am UTC (link)

Yeah well she didn't discuss her feelings either. She gave him a Look. Of course she liked it? Yeah those were fighting words, but she kept her mouth brazingly shut. "I'm not nineteen anymore, Doctor. I'm not going to have some stupid crush on you. You always just put yourself up on that pedestal because it couldn't possibly be the other way around right?" this time though she rolled her eyes.

Well that seemed to settle that, "Yes that's right you're amazing and I'm going to fall helplessly for you and then you'll be off again like always and crush my poor broken heart, right?" So much for not fighting. "Just forget it. I'm not looking for anymore pain.." half of that was said in jest but there was a bit of truth.

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on_comingstorm
2008-08-22 01:17 am UTC (link)

"Off where? This place just brings me right back. It's not as though I can stay gone forever, now is it? You just said you wouldn't hurt me. I'm more worried about me doing more damage to you than you already have experienced. Whether you want to believe it or not, I am trying to be a little selfless here." And regardless of whether she wanted to act like this, they always ended up needing him in ways he never was good for. Especially emotionally. Maybe all she needed was something physical, and maybe he did, too.

"You don't have to be practically a child to feel like that. Adults are perfectly capable of feeling that way." Then he got this frustrated, twisted look on his face. "Why do you have to be so difficult?" and threw his hands in the air.

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dontcallmesj
2008-08-22 01:29 am UTC (link)

"Everyone's dead, Doctor. Every man I have ever cared about is dead. Dead. What more damage could you possibly do? I can't get rid of you. If you die, you'll just turn into the next one with the big ears and I'm still stuck with you." She almost asked what was worse then that but quickly shut her mouth. She was being entirely difficult, she knew it. But that wasn't going to stop her.

Running a hand through her hair, she unfolded her arms, "I know how adults are capable of feeling, thank you. I will not and can not ever feel that way about you. Happy? Is that what you want me to say? Fine."

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on_comingstorm
2008-08-22 01:37 am UTC (link)

"Why the hell do you hate me so much? Alright, I did leave you behind, but that was over twenty years ago and you're still bitter over it? Is that it? I'm sorry. There. How many times do I have to apologize for it?" He honestly was at a loss of why she held such animosity towards him.

"When you stop lying to me, then maybe we could actually figure something out."

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dontcallmesj
2008-08-22 01:49 am UTC (link)

Good lord, he was one of the smartest people she knew but he could be so bloody dense sometimes. "I don't hate you, you pushed me into this stupid corner with all of this.. asking about my feelings and how I'm going to get hurt because everything with you is just one sided. Why would I possibly want to say anything about my feelings if you're just going to remain as tight lipped as you always are?"

She was more or less just grumbling instead of yelling. "There's nothing to figure out. You said it yourself. You are going to hurt me if and when I have feelings for you, and I do not want that. I think that's the end of us figuring something out."

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on_comingstorm
2008-08-22 01:58 am UTC (link)

"It's less of it ending up one sided and more like I am just incapable of expressing love like I should. I bottled it up before and didn't take the chance when she was alive. It's probably just going to end messily again because I am never good at this." Ugh, why did he have to keep repeating that he sucked at the domestic thing? No one obviously got that he just didn't do that kind of thing.

"Stop bloody arguing this with me for once. Do you really want me to use you to forget her? Because you and I both know that is what it is. A temporary fix to make our pain stop." When had he gotten so close to her either? Like he'd gained ground in the midst of the argument. "Fine. If that's what you want. I can fuck you until you forget how much it hurts to be alone but only if you make me forget I'm incapable of being a functional man of any sort for just as long."

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dontcallmesj
2008-08-22 02:11 am UTC (link)

"Then why on god's green earth do you think that means that I will turn out to be some kind of love sick teenager? I'm not good at this either, and I'm not arguing with you. I am agreeing. You think that I'm going to get hurt. I agree. Hence me agreeing!" she raised her arms up in frustration. It was like talking to a door sometimes

He was close up against her again, not that she wanted him to be there but still. "Now it's whatever I want? Two seconds ago it was 'I don't want to hurt you, Sarah' and now it's whatever I want? You can't have it both ways, Doctor."

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	on_comingstorm 2008-08-22 02:19 am UTC (link)
	"I'm tired of bloody fighting with you! I've really had my fill of it, thank you." Then he shook his head. No wonder people avoided them. Who would want this day in and day out? He did, sadly. It made him feel needed in some capacity. "Whatever you want. If you want me, then have me." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

dontcallmesj
2008-08-22 02:33 am UTC (link)

Yeah, people must have been sick of her long ago. Of course he didn't exactly answer the question really, instead leaving it all up to her as usual. She wasn't quite sure what to do with all of that so called power. Is this what she wanted? She told herself that he was right, that it was just them filling a need.

But what if he was right and she got her heart broken again? Well that was silly, she didn't think she had any left. That seemed to solidify things in her head. She didn't really feel anything but loneliness anymore so she'd be all right. "You're going to rue the day you left this in m hands.." she told him and then grabbed him rather roughly and kissed him desperately.

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on_comingstorm
2008-08-22 02:40 am UTC (link)

Maybe he would regret it and maybe not. He'd reached a point where he didn't care any more and he was glad when she just shut up and grabbed him. The kiss was rough and heated as he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her into him just as hard as she'd done to him, and he was all but dragging them out of the main room of the TARDIS and somewhere with a softer surface. He was not about to screw her on the console, and so the TARDIS provided a room just around the doorway for them.

He had to be in worse shape than her if he had two hearts and didn't feel like he could really feel anything except despair and grief. But then he started to tear at her clothing, and he knew he still had one more emotion left in him: lust. Pure and unadulterated. He needed her as much as she needed him. To help him feel and forget.

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dontcallmesj
2008-08-22 02:18 pm UTC (link)

Sarah let herself be pulled along with him, moving clumsily along to the bedroom with her arms around him and her mouth against his. It wasnt like either one was paying attention to where they were going really. The door shut behind them both and she helped him to get her out of her clothes, leaving them in a bit of a trail up to the bed before her knees hit the back of it.

She groaned a bit against his lips and then went to go slide off his clothes tossing them to the side each time she got a piece off before finally falling back onto the bed. At least her brain had shut off long enough for her to do this without thinking about anything bad, like Harry's grave or how they had just fought or anything else. Even if that argument had seemed to heat things between them.

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on_comingstorm
2008-08-22 04:09 pm UTC (link)

Yes, very good thing the Doctor wasn't thinking about any of this and letting Sarah Jane strip him as they went as he did the same. How was it she got him this riled up so fast when none of the others had managed such a task? Maybe she just knew what buttons to press, which he did his own share of to her. Tumbling into the bed with her, the Doctor shoved her back flat with a growl, daring her to fight back with him. Perhaps that was what he wanted. To be punished for being this way with her. Or for abandoning her all those years ago and leaving her and Harry to their eventual fates.

She said he'd rue the day he willingly gave her the choice of what to do with him. Right now he enjoyed every minute of this torture.

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dontcallmesj
2008-08-22 04:23 pm UTC (link)

If he wanted her to fight back, he was going to get his wish. As she was pushed back onto the bed, she reached up and tugged him on top of her, legs sliding apart so he rested against them. Her hips rocked violently against his, grinding fiercely and waited for him to get the rest of their clothes off before she dared made a move. As soon as his shirt was off, her hands were on his back, nails raking against skin.

Then she rolled them, pinning him down with her arms and then her legs, making sure that he was good and ready beneath her by sliding her hand down between his legs and stroking him roughly with her palm and the tips of her fingers.

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