Tweak

InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "INCONCEIVABLE!"

Alistair Therin (cheeseordeath) wrote in undertherainbow,
@ 2011-07-14 20:58:00

Entry tags:

alim surana, alistair, arthur pendragon, calliope sedant, isabela, leliana, zevran arainai

All right, I should probably be grateful to be living in a world with no darkspawn. No worries about getting woken up in the middle of the night by an attack of shrieks, no getting sent into the Deep Roads to investigate no-one-knows-what...instead I'm getting paid to sit on a beach surrounded by largely naked people. Many of them women. Very pretty women. Who might drown, in which case I'd get to save the day and be a hero, hurrah.

...so why am I so bored?

I tried to buy a sword and shield just so I could get in some practice on the side, even if it doesn't look like I'll need it here, but Maker's teeth, the paperwork...and one merchant even threatened to call the police when I asked about it.

(Post a new comment)

	camelotprince 2011-07-14 11:48 pm UTC (link)
	And one can't even wear armor without being treated like a lunatic. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-15 08:30 am UTC (link)
	Actually, wearing armor here would be like walking around wearing my own portable oven, so that's just as well. Can we even get armor here? Something that would actually work? I saw a glimpse of something they called armor in one of those movie-things. It was just absurd, no one would be able to move in armor made like that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	camelotprince 2011-07-15 04:51 pm UTC (link)
	There are a few times it would have come in handy. Probably not. Servants took my armor when I first arrived, and I haven't been able to find it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-15 08:53 pm UTC (link)
	Come in handy? Here? Against what, one of these car-things? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	camelotprince 2011-07-16 02:28 am UTC (link)
	A while back some sort of magical beasts attacked. The siege didn't last long, but I certainly would have preferred to have my armour and my knights here. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-16 06:00 am UTC

camelotprince, 2011-07-16 05:16 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-17 03:25 pm UTC

camelotprince, 2011-07-17 03:33 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-17 03:34 pm UTC

camelotprince, 2011-07-17 03:52 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-17 03:53 pm UTC

camelotprince, 2011-07-17 03:59 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-17 04:02 pm UTC

camelotprince, 2011-07-17 04:07 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-17 04:19 pm UTC

	elvenwarden 2011-07-15 12:26 am UTC (link)
	You must be the only one of us who actually misses having to fight for your life on a regular basis. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-15 08:33 am UTC (link)
	It's not the fighting for my life part so much, it's... Look, what do you actually do with yourself over here? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	elvenwarden 2011-07-15 08:37 am UTC (link)
	Whatever strikes your fancy. There's more than enough to do... it's a big world, after all, and those portkey things make it a lot easier to travel. Unless you're too busy staring at the almost-naked women. I'll understand if you are. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-15 08:38 am UTC (link)
	No, it's, I'm not, I mean...argh! Nevermind. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

elvenwarden, 2011-07-15 08:44 am UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-15 08:46 am UTC

elvenwarden, 2011-07-15 08:58 am UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-15 12:57 pm UTC

	easy_lover 2011-07-15 12:48 am UTC (link)
	If you wish, I will come and relieve you of your naked women. I am a kind soul, there is no need to thank me. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-15 08:31 am UTC (link)
	They're not my naked women, Zevran. And yes, you're the soul of altruism. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	easy_lover 2011-07-15 05:27 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, then I will come purloin women from your person regardless. And I know, it is a burden. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-15 08:53 pm UTC (link)
	They're not on my per--oh, Maker's breath, never mind, you're as incorrigible as ever. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

easy_lover, 2011-07-15 09:22 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-16 05:54 am UTC

	the_redlady 2011-07-15 12:55 am UTC (link)
	Sugar, I can chase you around and greviously injure you. I don't know what a darkspawn is, but I'll bet money I'm scarier. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-15 08:32 am UTC (link)
	...all right, you look like Leliana, but you are definitely not Leliana... And yes, yes you are. Thanks for the offer but I think I'll pass. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_redlady 2011-07-15 05:30 pm UTC (link)
	No, I'm Calliope. Aww. Why did all of you humans get so boring all of a sudden? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-15 08:44 pm UTC (link)
	...I was always boring. Ask anyone, they'll be happy to tell you. Especially Morrigan. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

the_redlady, 2011-07-15 09:22 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-16 05:55 am UTC

the_redlady, 2011-07-16 03:52 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-17 03:26 pm UTC

the_redlady, 2011-07-17 04:22 pm UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-17 04:26 pm UTC

	chantry_seeker 2011-07-15 11:20 am UTC (link)
	Of course you'd want to be the hero in saving pretty women. You actually miss the Darkspawn? And tracking around in the wilderness for weeks on end without a proper bed or even a shower? Maker's breath I don't miss those things. And um that woman above that looks like me but isn't me? You may want to steer clear of her. (Reply to this) (Thread)

cheeseordeath
2011-07-15 12:56 pm UTC (link)

I...don't particularly, actually. I mean, sure I wouldn't mind playing hero and saving some pretty women, but this job is still just strange. And of course I miss the Darkspawn! Life just isn't the same without ogre breath to brighten up the day! No, of course I don't miss Darkspawn, or tramping around everywhere without decent food or anything. But I do miss being useful.

And I'd...kind of gathered that. Is she always that frightening?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

chantry_seeker
2011-07-16 01:59 am UTC (link)

I'm sure there's something you can do here that will help you feel useful again! There seems to be an endless supply of options in this world. Of course getting used to the way this world works would be a large part of that as well.

I cannot say, I've only exchanged comments with her once, but something about her makes me feel uneasy. Sort of like the way Avernus gave me the creeps.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-16 06:02 am UTC (link)
	Avernus did more than give me the creeps. Now there was a man who enjoyed his work much too much...but yes, you're right, there's a bit of similarity there. She mentioned something about not eating me and I don't think she was kidding. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

chantry_seeker, 2011-07-16 06:35 am UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-16 06:43 am UTC

chantry_seeker, 2011-07-16 06:52 am UTC

cheeseordeath, 2011-07-16 11:21 am UTC

chantry_seeker, 2011-07-16 11:10 pm UTC

	rivainipirate 2011-07-15 04:09 pm UTC (link)
	There are things called police forces, or even armies. My boyfriend is a kind of lawman who concentrates on catching murderers. I don't know how he does it, but talk about being useful. Look into something like that, if you're feeling redundant. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-16 06:16 am UTC (link)
	Police? Are they like guards or something? Armies I think I'll pass on, my last experience with armies left a pretty bad taste in my mouth. Your boyfriend's job certainly sounds useful, though. Good to know. Thank you. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	coppermarigolds 2011-07-15 09:49 pm UTC (link)
	In a very interesting twist I was going to make a similar suggestion as Isabela. I'm part of the police force here in Malibu. I could put in a good word for you. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	cheeseordeath 2011-07-16 06:17 am UTC (link)
	Hold that thought and lets talk about it when we meet up? I think I need to know more, first. (Reply to this) (Parent)