InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "purple bunny! whoa! with teeth"

There's something wrong with Parker. (thethief) wrote in undertherainbow,
@ 2010-01-22 21:41:00

Entry tags:

eliot spencer, parker

I never write private things but I.. can't stand it anymore. Everyone just leaves and comes back and acts like it doesn't matter. Hardison just disappeared. So did Wade. And Eliot went off with his.. wife, and she disappeared. And Nate has Sam and Sophie. Everyone just left me by myself. I was fine by myself dammit. I didn't need anyone and now I'm upset because people left. Then they just come back like it doesn't matter. They had family. They have family. Everyone has family. But me.

I'm just always going to be by myself. I guess I deserve it. after all. I killed mine.

Job's done. Nearly wiped the casino out. Don't know what to do next. Maybe retire. Still hate this place. Can't I go home?

(Post a new comment)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 03:14 am UTC (link)
	You figure out how to go home, you better let me know. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 03:16 am UTC (link)
	Of course. I wish I knew. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 03:20 am UTC (link)
	Me too. This place is fucked up and seems to get more fucked up every fucking day. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 03:24 am UTC (link)
	It really is. I don't even know why I'm here. It's not like if I was gone anyone would care. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 03:26 am UTC (link)
	That's not true, Parker. I'd care. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 03:27 am UTC (link)
	Maybe now that she's gone, yeah. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 03:29 am UTC (link)
	Yeah. I was...distant, then. I'm...sorry. I just couldn't deal with things. Thought I wanted a change. And, while I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss her, I think maybe it's better this way. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 03:31 am UTC (link)
	It's.. whatever. Everyone either left, or went on their way without me. And if she was still here, you wouldn't care if I left so. I'm trying not to care anymore. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 03:33 am UTC (link)
	That's a sad way to be. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 03:37 am UTC (link)
	Yeah well, we don't all get family and people who like us. Like I said, I'm done. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 03:38 am UTC (link)
	Well, I'm still here. Planning to be here a while. Unless, or until, we find a way out. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 03:43 am UTC (link)
	You don't have to stick with me. I'm not very fun anymore. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 03:59 am UTC (link)
	You're still my friend, Parker. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 04:00 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, sure. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 04:10 am UTC (link)
	You are. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 04:14 am UTC (link)
	I'm just tired of being alone. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 04:53 am UTC (link)
	Parker, I'm right here. Hardison's here. Sophie's here. Nate...well, I don't know how much we can count on him. You're not alone. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 05:06 am UTC (link)
	People just come and go though. Or they move on. I was the only one left. The only one left alone. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 05:12 am UTC (link)
	You're not alone now, Parker. I was an ass about the whole thing. I get that now. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 05:32 am UTC (link)
	I still feel alone. No, you were just happy for once and had someone. You shouldn't be blamed for that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 04:53 pm UTC (link)
	I don't know that I was really happy. I mean, we were drunk, when we were married and because of that whole goddess thing and something about the water, we were locked in to it. And yeah, I was pissed when she left, but I didn't have a say in it. I don't like when I don't get to choose. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 09:35 pm UTC (link)
	Then I'm sorry you weren't happy. I know what you mean. I don't like it either. I just. I don't know. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 09:55 pm UTC (link)
	I don't either, really. I'm not much better with the whole emotions thing than you, you know. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 10:00 pm UTC (link)
	None of us are any good with it. I just hate feeling like this. I didn't want to care. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thatswhatido 2010-01-23 10:09 pm UTC (link)
	I know. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	thebearclaw 2010-01-23 03:16 am UTC (link)
	I for one would be sad to see you retire. You're one of, if not the best. What's going on, Parker? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 03:25 am UTC (link)
	I am the best. I just don't know what the point is. Peter Just tired of people leaving and I'm not supposed to have emotions but everyone just.. left. And now they're back, or they don't care. I know this doesn't make sense. Sorry. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thebearclaw 2010-01-23 03:54 am UTC (link)
	You seem to enjoy it? I don't know; why do you do what you do? [Parker] And why aren't you supposed to have emotions? Everyone has emotions. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 04:00 am UTC (link)
	Because I like cash. [Peter] Just not good at them. Not good at anything but stealing things. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thebearclaw 2010-01-23 04:55 am UTC (link)
	Then do it because you like money. It's as good a reason as any, right? [Parker] You seem to be better at talking to people than I am. And you can work to be better at things you want to be. Part of the good thing about this place. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thethief 2010-01-23 05:07 am UTC (link)
	I have a lot of money. [Peter] I'm really not. I don't know what to say or how to say it. Nah, I'm not good at things I want to be either. I don't want to be anything. I just want to go home. (Reply to this) (Parent)