Starbuck (_starbuck_) wrote in tiberiusswann, @ 2011-09-22 11:23:00 |
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Entry tags: | ava, starbuck |
Friday: January/30/09
Who: Starbuck and Ava
When: Friday afternoon
Where: Godric’s BGH
What: Starbuck drops in to look after a friend.
Starbuck didn’t pay any attention to Ava’s protests. She was trying to be strong, as usual, but he saw through it. It couldn’t have been easy to ‘celebrate’ her anniversary by signing divorce papers. And then a car crash on top of everything! He found it troubling that she’d not yet healed from the injuries she suffered in the wreck. That wasn’t normal for a vampire, was it? He’d healed vampires before, Charlie included, but usually they took care of themselves in that department.
After telling Kim what was up and giving Kamea a quick kiss, Starbuck ran out to get in his car and headed over to Godric’s place. It seemed to be a halfway house for those who got fed up with TJS but couldn’t quite give up on the school entirely. It was a nice house, absolutely, but Starbuck kinda liked living on campus. He and Kim had a good little home that suited them just fine for the time being. He’d wait until they moved back to Maui to get a proper house.
Since it was still daylight, Starbuck figured none of the vampire inhabitants would open the door for him, and he had said he was on his way, so he showed himself inside. Well, after knocking and yelling in that it was him.
“Ava?” he called out once he shut the door, staying close to it so that he wouldn’t be too much of an intrusion.
---
Starbuck had summed it all up in a few words. It had been a ‘shit week’ for the vampire. Hope was back, and she had never been particularly fond of Ava, not to mention the fact she assumed that meant the end of the current situation between her and Godric. Then her anniversary was spent avoiding anyone else in the house until the sun set and she ended up in a park having a fight with her soon to be ex-husband, and all topped off by her stupid car crash, and signing divorce papers. Bad week was an understatement.
Ava screamed under her breath with frustration as the nymph said he was on his way, and logged off, tidying her room since she assumed that was where they would end up. Ironic, not so long ago she would have thought it a great victory to get Starbuck in her room. It wasn’t that long before she heard him let himself in and shut the door though, signalling it safe for her to go downstairs and greet him.
Although she had protested this visit, the sight of her friend was a glad one and she sighed in relief, then winced at the slight pain still left in her ribs. As she told him before, there were a few bruises and cuts still showing, but definitely healing. There was probably more shock in the fact she was still wearing a mens shirt and a pair of panties, as if she hadn’t got dressed at all yet. “Come upstairs.” Ava said simply and softly, leading the way.
---
Starbuck’s cheeks flushed slightly at the state Ava was in. Really, she had enough notice that he was coming to put on some clothes! But when he saw the little wince, he could tell she was in pain, and Starbuck hurried over to her. She was walking at least, and he fell in step beside her. “You probably have some fractured ribs. Why didn’t you call me after the crash?” There was no sense in her being in pain like this. He could fix her injuries easily enough. Then again, given the emotional shit she’d been through lately, maybe she wanted to suffer. He’d been that sort of stubborn asshole before, insisting on suffering from an injury that he’d inflicted upon himself. The broken knuckles after getting in that fight over Kat came to mind.
---
Yes, she could have put on more clothes when she knew he was coming, but that would have meant putting on proper clothes, and she didn’t feel like wearing anything that structured. At least the shirt was oversized enough to cover more than some mini dresses.
That worry in his voice and his very being was exactly why she didn’t mean to bother him with any of it. He worried too much, and he shouldn’t have to worry about her. “It was the middle of the night. I wasn’t going to get you out of bed to get me when Godric was perfectly capable of picking me up and getting rid of the EMTs.” She explained simply as they approached her room and she let him in, going back to sit on her bed where her laptop lay.
---
“It’s not only my job to take care of everyone at TJS, but I just so happen to be your friend as well, Ava. You should have called me.” He would have been sleeping, sure, but who the fuck cared? Starbuck was never put off by having to take care of a friend in need.
Once in their room, Starbuck came over and sat beside Ava on the bed. “Will you let me look at your injuries now? Really, you shouldn’t be in pain. I can fix it.”
---
Rolling her eyes, she looked around at him briefly. “It is your job to heal people when they want it or absolutely need it, not to pick people up from Salem in the middle of the night, and it is because you are my friend that I didn’t want to worry you or make you come out when someone else could just as easily do it and was already awake.” Ava told him sensibly.
“I’m fine. I’m healing, and maybe it will remind me to be more careful when driving.” She assured Starbuck. “But thank you anyway. You really didn’t need to come over.”
----
Fine. Ava made sense, sorta, but that wasn’t the point. He was still irritated that she’d not contacted him to at least tell him what happened. He had to practically drag it out of her on AIM. The whole tough act was getting old. Starbuck knew Ava was hurting, and while he didn’t think it was healthy for her to sit around sobbing all the time, she wasn’t helping herself by bottling it up either.
“I wanted to come over,” he stressed. “Let me at least fix your ribs. If you want to keep the external battle scars as a reminder of your stupidity,” yep, he said it, “Then that’s all well and good, but I can’t stand to watch you wince from what’s got to be a broken or bruised rib or two.”
---
“Fine!” She agreed with a big sigh of giving up, followed by yet another wince which signalled she shouldn’t really be arguing it anyway. “Will it make you happy to fix my ribs? Although broken sounds too dramatic, they are probably just cracked, and they are healing already too.” Ava tried to dismiss it all. “I... might... let you heal anything that could leave a scar too....” She added softly. Vanity, thy name is Ava.
---
Starbuck rolled his eyes at the scar shit. “Scars add character.” At least that’s what Charlie had told him. The guy was just trying to be tough after having his flesh burned off by angel blood, but he really didn’t seem all that stressed out about the marks left behind forever on his thighs and forearms.
“Lie back,” Starbuck informed her, scooting off the bed to stand beside it and give her room. When it came to healing, he was typically able to focus on the injury and the patient, and ignore the fact that they might be mostly naked and good looking. He really hoped Ava had on underwear though.
---
Starbuck just received a look for that line. “On men. On women, especially ones like me, they are best avoided, especially in obvious places, but you don’t have to heal them if you don’t want to.” Even though she pretty much knew he would anyway.
Moving carefully, Ava did what she was told and laid down on the bed. She’d never actually been healed by Starbuck before though, so she wasn’t sure whether to remove the shirt. “Do you need skin to skin contact or would you rather I kept the shirt?”
---
“Of course I’ll heal them. What sort of brute would I be to let your lovely skin be marred for life.” He smiled bright and wide and then chuckled. Starbuck would fix her up good as new if she let him. He didn’t like seeing a friend in pain.
“I do.. so, just slide it up,” he told her. It was a relief to see she did have on underwear, because he really wasn’t looking to catch a glimpse of Ava’s, well, yeah. Anyway! Starbuck took a deep breath and then rubbed his hands together for a few seconds. “It feels cold.. and there’s a tingle involved... but it won’t hurt. And you’ll have my handprints glowing bright blue on your skin for a day or so.” After warning her, he gently rested his palms on her rib cage, sliding them around on her skin until he could feel the damage within. Starbuck concentrated then, honing his focus on the fracture, which was slight, but still there. His hands began to glow then, and the blue light seeped into her flesh.
---
He was such a dork, but it suited him, and she couldn’t fault him for it, so Ava just laughed too, carefully, and stopping when it hurt, but it glowed in her eyes. She didn’t want it completely healed, but she wasn’t sure she had any control over that now.
The thought of taking the shirt off, or completely unbuttoning it had struck her, just to see his reaction, but she was good and did as he said, gently sliding the material up until it rested just above the curve of her breast. What? It was so he could get to the bit that hurt, not because she wanted to see if he noticed it, of course not. “I always knew I’d get those hands on my chest someday.” Ava teased, “and with proof too. Wonderful.” The rest of his warnings were just listened to and not acknowledged though.
He wasn’t kidding about the cold, and she wished she could see it too, but laying flat she couldn’t quite get the angle needed for that. It was such a strange sensation though that she was captivated by the wonder until it was over and she could move without pain to look at the handprints.
---
He was a guy, happily dating the woman of his dreams, but still a guy. Of course he noticed the little underside of her breast that showed as she slid her shirt up. But Starbuck was polite enough and professional enough to pretend he didn’t. Besides, he had important healing matters to attend to.
And once she was moving around, he could definitely tell he’d fixed the damaged ribs. Two of them to be exact. “Better, huh? And to think, you could have felt better all this time.. if you’d called me.” He swatted her abdomen and then pulled her shirt down to cover it again.
---
“And miss the chance to wallow in my pain and my injuries? Why would I do that?” She joked, sitting up again, running her fingers under her shirt and over the blue handprints absentmindedly. “Besides... it’s not like the other person was lucky enough to have a healer as a friend. Why should I be fixed when I broke them?” Ava added softly.
---
Starbuck was amused until Ava mentioned someone else being injured. His smile faded into a frown of concern. “Do you know if they’ll be okay?” he asked softly, taking a seat on the bed once more. Starbuck wished he could heal everyone. He knew that injuries and sickness and death were all part of the cycle of life, but he had a gift, and he wanted to help erase as much pain as he could with it.
---
Nodding softly, she looked down and back up at him. “I don’t really know. I think they said because he hit me in the side instead of head on it wasn’t as bad as it could have been for him, but I heard something about watching for head injuries or something... he didn’t look too bad though. I hope he’s ok. It was so stupid of me...” It was clear she was beating herself up over it. Car accidents had always shaken her, nevermind being in one of them, and then being the cause of it... So stupid.
---
“Do you know what hospital they took him to? I could look into it.. see how he’s doing.. maybe have Wes heal him.” Because Wes didn’t leave marks when he healed people. Starbuck’s ability had a serious flaw in that department.
Seeing that Ava was upset, Starbuck scooted over and wrapped his arm around her. “Hey.. it’s okay. I’m sure he’s going to be fine. And you’re going to be fine.. eventually.” She was hurting now, and she might for some time to come, but she’d get through this. He still couldn’t believe she signed the papers, or that Charlie even sent them for that matter, but if they were ready to end their marriage, who was Starbuck to stop them?
---
“No...” She shook her head. “I wasn’t really... with it, and I was trying to dodge the EMTs anyway. I’m sure I’ll hear about it soon enough, insurance claims and all.” Ava tried to joke, even giving a small nervous laugh.
That hug.... it was needed more than she would ever admit, and she leant in to Starbuck, accepting the comfort for once. “Eventually.” She whispered. “I saw him. On our anniversary. We both went to the place we got married, not knowing the other would be there.... It was ugly and horrible. I left, that’s where I was coming back from when the accident happened...”
---
Starbuck wrapped his other arm around her as well and gave her a little squeeze, letting her rest against him. He wished he could heal all her pain, including the ache of love lost. Nothing hurt worse than that, and it was the only kind of injury he couldn’t fix. Damn the luck.
Hearing what caused the crash, Starbuck understood things better. “I can’t imagine seeing him on your anniversary, when things are falling apart, would be easy... or pleasant.” There were probably tears, and screaming, and words exchanged that both now regretted. “Hopefully he wasn’t foolish enough to drive while upset. Get a cab next time, okay?”
---
It was funny, when she came to the school Ava never would have imagined that only a year and a half later she would be signing divorce papers and actually being upset by it, having a broken heart. She wouldn’t have even imagined that she would be the sort of person to let someone else comfort her, and yet in recent weeks she had found herself in the arms of not just one, but two very good friends, not fighting it at all, just leaning in and accepting it.
She thought that it might help put everything into context for Starbuck, although she was usually loath to mention her marriage because it usually ended in an arguement between them. “And leave my beautiful car in that car park overnight? No.. I should have just walked away when we looked at each other and he turned away. I should have let it be and then we wouldn’t have fought, and I wouldn’t have been crying, and I wouldn’t have pulled out onto a main road without looking.” She sighed.
---
Yeah, Starbuck and Ava had gotten into quite a few heated discussions where her marriage was concerned. It was because Starbuck really wanted things to work out between Charlie and Ava. He saw how good they could be together. Was it perfect? No. But no relationship was. He did, however, think they were perfect for each other.
“He turned away?” Starbuck found that hard to believe. Maybe Charlie really had given up. The papers were his way of surrendering. But if they fought after that, then there was something worth fighting for.
“I think it’s normal for you to be upset. Yeah, it wasn’t all that smart to try and drive in that state, but I get it. After Kim’s fight with her brother, she called me. She’d tried to drive but was crying too much to get home on her own and in one piece.” It scared Starbuck to think that Kim could have done something like Ava did, only the consequences probably would have been far worse, since lycans weren’t as durable as vampires.
---
“He turned away.” She repeated. “I tripped on some ice, he turned, looked at me, and turned away again.” She should have just taken that as some sign things were over and gone home, signed the papers, and let herself move on. “Kim’s a smart woman. I’m glad she pulled over and didn’t do what I did. I don’t think you’d cope well if something happened to her, and well... she’s a good person too, even if she did take you off the market.” Ava joked lightly. “Although I don’t think you’d be a very good choice for a rebound man.”
---
Starbuck frowned. Sounded like Charlie wanted to avoid Ava. Starbuck couldn’t really blame him. If you couldn’t have the person you loved, it was easier to never have to see them again. Maybe. Actually, would anything really make that sort of ache easier to withstand? Starbuck hadn’t felt as strongly for Kat as Charlie felt about Ava, so he couldn’t compare in that case. But if things fell apart with Kim, and Starbuck was forced to go on without her, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to continue breathing.
“I don’t know that I could survive without her. She has my heart. Can’t very well go on without it, can I?” It was metaphorical, but it felt literal. The only way Starbuck could force himself to live without Kim was to dive into parenthood. He had Kamea, and soon he’d have Reed. Heartbreak or not, he had to be there for them.
Her joke managed to get a weak chuckle out of Starbuck. “I’m permanently off the market. Ring or not, I’m done with all other women for the rest of my days. She’s it for me.”
---
“You’d me amazed what you can survive without when it comes to it.” She said softly, give him a small smile, “but this is you, I’ve seen the way you look at her, and I’ve heard the way you talk about her... so maybe....” Starbuck was a romantic, a different sort of person to her. Who knew? Maybe he was right, maybe he wouldn’t survive without Kim.
Ava laughed again as he declared himself permanently off the market. “I didn’t know my heart could break any further but you’ve done it.” She joked, keeping the tone as she dropped a new piece of information on him. “Lucky I have another man to comfort me and let himself be used to mend the broken pieces, or sort of date as some would call it.”
---
Starbuck just shrugged. Yeah, he was smitten. He’d never felt this way about anyone before, and he knew he wouldn’t feel this way about anyone ever again. A series of crazy events collided to bring him and Kim together. It was just meant to be.
“Awe, sorry, babe,” he teased at first, but then he pulled back slightly, looking at her strangely, “Is that so?” Starbuck had heard rumors, but he tried to avoid them. Actually, he didn’t care to know about Ava’s rebounding. He was friends with Charlie, talked to the guy from time to time, and it would be really fucking awkward to know that Ava was fucking other dudes. But, she signed the papers, so he supposed she may as well. It just didn’t seem right.
---
This was another one of those things she didn’t really expect Starbuck to understand or approve of, but she wasn’t going to hide it, or act as if it was something shameful. “Don’t look at me like that, or use that tone. I’m not looking for a new husband, or even a boyfriend. It’s just....dates and sex, without any of the expectations or overcomplicating things. Mutual... using of the other for comfort. I think. Maybe.... but don’t worry, I won’t tell you more, or put you in more of an awkward position. That’s all.” Ava reassured him. “I’m ok now... less pain....you don’t have to stay if you don’t want to. I’m sure Kim and Kamea need you more.”
---
Starbuck looked down and nodded. “I know.. I’m sorry.” He didn’t want to pass judgment. Ava meant a lot to him, and it wasn’t fair to judge her. They were very different people, and what was right for him, wasn’t right for everyone. It just pained him. “Sex always complicates things, especially when you don’t want it to. But, yeah, please don’t tell me more. I’ll probably talk to Charlie later, and if asks about you, I don’t want to have to lie.” Although Starbuck highly doubted Charlie would ask. He hadn’t once since leaving campus. It seemed like he was trying to avoid asking questions about things he didn’t want to know.
“Just because your ribs are healed doesn’t mean you’re in less pain. I can stay. Kim and Kamea are fine.” They didn’t need his 24-7 presence.
---
Ava had meant the comment on his judging as a joke, if a bad one, and one a little too close to the truth, but she knew it came across wrong sometimes, so she waved off his apology as fine. “I’m glad you still talk to him, that something good came from my marriage, even if it’s just the both of you realising the other isn’t as much of a ‘douche’ as you thought before.” Really Charlie and Starbuck were as alike as they were different in her eyes. She was glad they got along now.
His hero complex, and the way he always wanted to help a friend was sweet and she rewarded him with a small smile. “I’m tired....is it ok if I sleep? I haven’t.... I haven’t been sleeping well since.... nightmares.” Ava told him haltingly with her unvoiced question of whether he minded staying and holding her while she slept.
---
“Yeah, well, he’s an alright dude. And he was really good to Kamea and Kim. Maggie’s a sweet kid too.” Starbuck missed them. He missed having another ‘couple’ for he and Kim to hang out with. It wasn’t terribly often, but it was still nice.
“Uh, sure.. do you want me to stay? I mean, if that helps you fall asleep.” Frankie was like that. She slept better when someone was beside her. Kim knew that all too well.
---
“She’s an amazing kid.” Ava corrected him. It was clear that despite all the mess with Charlie she still really cared about Maggie. “I miss them all truth be told...” She had no-one to blame but herself for being without them though, so she didn’t say more on the matter.
So he didn’t quite get her question, and his own was a little hesitant, making her wonder if she had any right to ask this of him. “That’s what I was asking but.... you don’t have to, if it makes you uncomfortable...”
---
“Sorry, amazing,” Starbuck agreed. “I know you miss them. We all do... but they weren’t my family.” So he knew it was a million times harder for Ava to go on without them. Starbuck hoped the situation would change in the future. Maybe they could work things out one day and be together again.
“No, it’s fine.. I just wasn’t sure.” He couldn’t tell if she was asking him to leave or asking him to stay. He kicked off his shoes so he wouldn’t get anything dirty, and then walked around to the other side of the bed. Starbuck laid down on top the covers, letting Ava get comfortable. “I can stay as long as you want. I told Kim I wasn’t sure how long I’d be gone.”
---
Ava wriggled down to get comfortable and waited for him to climb back on the bed. As soon as he seemed comfortable she moved herself almost into his arms, as if she wanted them for protection. If only a pair of arms really was enough to protect her from everything, even herself. A joking threat ran through her mind about how Starbuck better keep quiet and not tell anyone she was this vulnerable with him, but all that came from her was a soft “thank you” before she closed her eyes and tried to sleep.
---
Starbuck did wrap his arms around her, because he could tell Ava needed it. She may have thought that running off to have sex was the solution, but it wasn’t. That wasn’t what was truly missing from her life. This is what she missed. She had the safety and comfort that only came from a loving family, and now it was gone. He’d feel like shit if he were in her position.
“Anytime,” was all he said in response to her appreciative mumble. He felt bad for Ava. But he wasn’t staying out of pity. He just hoped he could do something, anything, to make her feel better, even if it was brief.