InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I can has tofu?"

Ren Waugh-Solo (behindthemask) wrote in thedisplaced,
@ 2017-11-22 09:09:00

Entry tags:

!network post, kylo ren / ben solo, leia organa (legends)

(021) Kylo Ren
[Filter: Leia Organa]

I moved back to the apartment for a while.

[Added later: Filter to Eliot]

My grandmother is here.

Millicent is angry at me, I'm fairly certain.

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el/ky

behindthemask
2017-11-23 04:18 am UTC (link)

No. And I think he may be from Leia's timeline. I'm not certain there is any point to it, I just thought I would see what you thought about it. [...] Your perspective is likely less biased than mine.

Millicent is calming, but not as much as you. I hope tonight is better. You could come here though. It wouldn't be the same, but you could if you want [...] some night.

No. Not really. [...] But maybe that doesn't matter exactly. [...] You should know, anyway -- what I'm capable of. You should know that.

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Re: el/ky

highkingeliot
2017-11-23 04:30 am UTC (link)

Well, you are most likely going to have to interact with him at some point, since he is important to Leia. Regardless of timeline. [...] It might be easier to do so on your terms than by accident.

Tonight will be better. The first night was bound to be the worst. [...] Can I come whenever I want?

Knowing what is out there would probably be a good idea. [...] Alright. [...] Are we going to just watch the one with you? Or them all?

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el/ky

behindthemask
2017-11-23 04:36 am UTC (link)

That's a good point. I'll think about it.

What do you think, El? My grandmother may wonder about you if you come at odd times of the day or night although I have a difficult time seeing her not liking you.

I [...] I hadn't gotten that far. It feels awkward to watch [...] but I only know what Snoke has told me about grandfather, and what I've uncovered myself. Maybe watching the other would be [...] useful. Have you watched any of them?

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el/ky

highkingeliot
2017-11-23 04:47 am UTC (link)

Alright.

~~What is there to wonder about? We aren't keeping a secret.~~ I've never spoken to her.

[...] I think it might be important for you to see them all. I just think it is also going to be really hard on you. [...] I've seen all of the Originals. I saw the first one, when I was younger, and then the third one. I missed the one in the middle.

I'll watch them with you.

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	el/ky behindthemask 2017-11-23 04:53 am UTC (link)
	She's [...] kind, and very refined. I think you would like her. I'll introduce you sometime. I admit I was hoping you would. I don't know what to expect exactly, but I didn't enjoy seeing the part I saw, so I can't imagine the entire thing will be better. But I'm hoping if I watch them with you, then I'll be all right. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky highkingeliot 2017-11-23 04:59 am UTC (link)
	If she's going to be around often, I'd like to be introduced. Perhaps we could plan for dinner one night? I don't know what to expect from the one you are in, only the others. And even they are fuzzy in memory. But it will be helpful in the end to watch them. And I'll be there right by your side as you do. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

el/ky

behindthemask
2017-11-23 05:06 am UTC (link)

I'll ask her. But maybe this weekend, or sometime after the holiday we could do that.

I had thought to just. I think I wanted to think that it didn't matter here. I don't think of other people's lives before here, except for yours maybe, because you're mine and it matters to me. But I don't think about it with others. It still feels unfair that they think about my past, but I [...] perhaps I have been the one that has been pretending all this time anyway.

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el/ky

highkingeliot
2017-11-23 04:06 pm UTC (link)

We're still on break from the play through Sunday. Otherwise, I'm not sure when I can. There's a lot of rehearsals coming up.

You aren't afraid of them, either. I'm not saying everyone is afraid of you but it potentially is a variable. Probably more than potentially. And it doesn't help that when it comes to levels of notoriety, all of you are at the top tier. [...] They are always going to be thinking about your past.

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el/ky

behindthemask
2017-11-23 04:32 pm UTC (link)

Right. Do you need help with lines? I suddenly rather feel as if I picked the worst possible time to move out.

I just [...] I don't know what they expect from me, El. I've been here for close to a year. I've kept to myself. I haven't bothered anyone that I know of. I honestly can't remember any interaction that should have been perceived as a threat. I fought with them when we were attacked by Force knows whatever that mob was in the 50s. I was under no illusions that I was close friends with any of them, but I thought - at least they understood I wasn't a danger to them. It feels impossible.

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el/ky

highkingeliot
2017-11-23 05:45 pm UTC (link)

Yes, please. [...] There isn't really an ideal time when it comes to moving out.

Maybe keeping to ourselves has been part of the problem. Maybe. [...] You're going to need to pin down who you want to be in their eyes. It isn't just who I see or who Petunia, Quentin, Leia, or anyone else who has gotten close sees. The general public is going to be a lot harder to convince of whether you are being genuine or not.

And, well, you need to accept they might never see you as anything else than what the film shows.

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el/ky

behindthemask
2017-11-23 06:37 pm UTC (link)

No. There isn't. I don't like it. I do think it was a good decision. ~~I think.~~ When I realized grandmother was here alone [...] it maybe seemed like it was good for other reasons too.

Maybe. But I think you underestimate my social skills. You're good with people and parties and people like you. I'm not any of those things. I'm afraid if I started interacting more I'd just inadvertently reinforce people's views without intending to. I ended up doing that the other day, didn't I?

[...]

~~I feel like I did when I was a boy~~ I end up feeling like no matter what I do I'm going to fail at it. ~~I just don't want to fail you.~~ I don't want to trade one mask for another, but I think it's fairly clear most of them won't like me. You're an exception. I'm not Dameron.

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el/ky

highkingeliot
2017-11-24 12:37 am UTC (link)

I don't like it either. [...] It'll ease up the tension. ~~I guess.~~ So, that is worth it. I didn't like how it was affecting everyone. [...] Yeah, that's a positive.

You always say that. I'm not saying you should go out and try to be everyone's friend. But maybe we ought to go to some of the public events more. Mingle. [...] Maybe interact when it isn't just viewed as a defense? Comment on [...] mundane, every day things? That aren't tied to you or your universe? Perhaps? I'm just spinning ideas here.

Then don't put on a mask. Just be the man you are around me. [...] They might not but you aren't completely without allies. And I'm not talking just myself. [...] You don't need to be like Poe.

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	el/ky behindthemask 2017-11-24 01:05 am UTC (link)
	I didn't either. I wish it weren't that way. You think I should? ~~I never know what to sa~~ [...] I could try. If you think it would help. ~~Don't I?~~ So far it's not really worked so amazingly. Except for people who are actually around maybe. Except for Margo. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky highkingeliot 2017-11-24 01:12 am UTC (link)
	It has to get better, right? It might help. Or maybe try to strike up conversations off network too? [...] Have you talked to Anakin about this specifically? I think we just need to accept Margo might not be in the cards. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky behindthemask 2017-11-24 01:16 am UTC (link)
	I want a life with you here. It has to get better. No. [...] I can talk to you. I don't know how to do it with other people. Then what? She's your best friend. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

el/ky

highkingeliot
2017-11-24 01:25 am UTC (link)

We're going to have a life together. I'm not letting you go.

He might have insight? [...] Do you want to try to do it together? We could mingle out in town? Maybe we could go shopping on Friday. There will be plenty of people out.

We'll keep you apart. [...] I don't know if she's going to change her mind. I think it is better to just anticipate her not doing so and be pleasant surprised if she comes around. [...] I want her to come around.

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	el/ky behindthemask 2017-11-24 01:34 am UTC (link)
	I want you. It's the one thing I'm very certain of right now. I could ask about it. [...] Maybe for a little while. I don't know if I want to do it for the entire day, but we could for a while. ~~I tried to talk to he~~ That's not exactly what I meant. Never mind. You're probably right. I wish I believed she would. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky highkingeliot 2017-11-24 01:37 am UTC (link)
	You got me. He's in a similar position. I don't know if he'd be able to help but since you two talk... [...] I don't want to do it for the entire day either. We can hit up somewhere for lunch, too. Chat up the wait staff. Compliment and the like. What did you mean, Ky? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky behindthemask 2017-11-24 01:55 am UTC (link)
	I know. I'll ask him. He's in a house too, but obviously it's not bothering him as much if people there don't like him. ~~Maybe it shouldn't be bothering me.~~ All right. As long as you understand I'm never going to be outgoing exactly. We can hardly tell her she has to move out. But this isn't really home for me either. I'm thinking too far ahead, aren't I? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky highkingeliot 2017-11-24 02:02 am UTC (link)
	That doesn't mean it hasn't bothered him, either. And I'm not expecting you to be. No, we can't tell her that, and I wouldn't want her to. And I want you to come home. Perhaps, with time, we can be like a normal house and just ignore one another. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky behindthemask 2017-11-24 02:12 am UTC (link)
	All right. I can smile at least I think. Right. Yeah. Okay. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky highkingeliot 2017-11-24 02:24 am UTC (link)
	You've got a beautiful smile. I don't know, Ky. It was easier last time. She got to see what you meant to me and it wasn't just thrown at her for her to be judgmental about. [...] She doesn't understand now how much having you around... ...mattered. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	el/ky behindthemask 2017-11-24 02:44 am UTC (link)
	You're biased. For me too. When I was here before on the Island, it was [...] well it was Hux and I, but we just stayed to ourselves. Nobody really wanted to do anything with us. My grandparents briefly. This time I didn't expect [...] You. I didn't expect you, and everything. Maybe together we can convince her. But if not, we'll figure that out too. Together. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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