InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "My brain is squishy."

Willow Danielle Rosenberg - Buffyverse (extraflamey) wrote in thedisplaced,
@ 2017-11-19 02:52:00

Entry tags:

!log/thread, tara maclay, willow rosenberg

Who: Willow & Tara
What: Awkward run ins during research time
Where: Casa de Buffy
When: Nov 19th - Eeeeaaarrrly morning (1am)
Warnings: Awkward, and fluff.

Part of her ideals and understandings of the socio-cultural environment surrounding homosexuality and homosexual practices was a bit antiquated considering the time period she was from against the time period she was now in. The internet had solved that misunderstanding quite quickly, and rather forcefully. Some of the communities talking about these things had some very strong opinions about this stuff.

That then lead down another whole train of thought. How did people know they were gay? Sure, she’d asked Prompto and Vanille how they’d figured it out - they both seemed to just know - and what they had both said had made a lot of sense. Especially, that whole part where Prompto had told her that sometimes people just went for people, and it was just a connection you felt with specific individuals. And once they did sort of iron out if they were gay or not, did their relationships work any differently? Being raised and coming from SoCal Willow couldn’t imagine they could, but at the exact same time every subculture had their own things, their own aspects and unspoken rules that should be abided by to be a good respectful member of the community and considering all the other distress she seemed to be causing as of late finding outs to cause less seemed like a blessing.

Even if that ‘out’ to cause less distress meant she was now sitting on her computer looking at the google search results that ‘How do you know if you're gay?’ had brought up. The first link was a wiki article and that seemed…. Potentially promising. And it had pictures too! Pictures were good! Though…. The pictures weren’t helpful charts and graphics much to her dismay and more akin to emotionally descriptive comics. Either way eyes would roam of the numbers, skimming largely the socio-cultural advice aspects, the political sections, until she hit the science bit. Then Willow would stop and fully read, and…. Huh.

Theeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnn there was all the next steps about considering your own sexual fantasies and experiences and… Oh boy. This was a lot. This was…. Embarrassing. Maybe she should…. It was late, everyone was probably asleep. It was fine to go get a drink of water and take a breath and come back to her computer after…. Cooling… Down.

Right, okay. So.

Shifting quickly, the computer was placed down onto the coffee table in the living room as Willow stood - no thought given to bringing the screen saver up or locking the screen - and moved out to the kitchen to get a glass of water and…. Take a few minutes to get her own thoughts about flights of fancy to get reigned back in.

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timidwitch
2017-12-01 05:53 pm UTC (link)

Tara reached out and put a hand on Willow's shoulder. "Will, there's no set number of steps. Everyone figures it out on their own, at their own pace. Maybe you're done. Maybe you're not. But either way, you're on the right track. Just accept yourself, forgive yourself, and love yourself."

And then she stood up, hand lingering on Willow's shoulder for a moment. "I'm going back to bed... If you need to talk, we'll do it in the morning." She smiled sleepily.

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extraflamey
2017-12-03 08:49 am UTC (link)

The speech was an interesting addition to their evening so far. Did she appear like she didn't forgive herself? Or accept herself? Willow hadn't believed she'd appeared that way but... Sometimes we were the last ones to figure out these things about ourselves. The touch wasn't shied away from at all however and that... That was nice. It was nice not to second guess herself, not to shrink back in fear of upsetting the other woman, and just be here. Now. Like this.

"Are you.... Are you sure you don't need a glass of warm milk? I could heat one up for you." The mild worry, and obvious concern was present in her tone but it was obviously born out of caring than anything else.

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	timidwitch 2017-12-04 01:58 am UTC (link)
	Tara turned back around and smiled fondly at Willow. "No, thank you, Willow. You're sweet, you know that? You always have been." And with that, she went for the stairs to the basement. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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