Meg Callahan (setinstone) wrote in the_colony, @ 2011-01-05 21:07:00 |
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Entry tags: | ^ week 24, derek miller, meghan callahan, | derek and meg |
Week 24 - Tuesday afternoon
Characters: Derek and Meg
Location: Parlor
Summery: Derek's feeling frazzled thanks the events of the last evening; Meg understands and offers her company
Rating: PG
Derek was anti-social. Everyone said so and for the most part, it was true. He didn’t always feel the need to be around people and worked best alone even though a couple people here had somehow worked their way under his skin. He’d stayed around because Meg and the Doc wanted him to and that was the truth. Now, after encountering Alice on her own escape attempt his mind was filled with his own. Tom had chewed him out for giving Alice his gun but he wondered how much the things he said helped bring Alice back. Not that anyone would ever mention that. But he’d owed Alice that much, in exchange for the words of Meg and Louisa May.
Thoroughly admonished by their fearless leader, Derek found himself craving company in a way that was still unusual for him.. Too bad he couldn’t find Meg. The two of them were still working on that whole friends thing but Derek didn’t often seek her company - he had no desire to find her with her husband. Today was the exception but Derek was fairly sure the blind woman wasn’t in the house. He gave up and was going to visit Louisa when he nearly walked into Meg coming in from outside. For a second they both occupied the same space in front of the door before he quickly backed away.
“Whoa. Sorry.”
If she hadn’t been in such a hurry to get in from the cold, Meg might’ve actually noticed the presence of someone just inside the doorway, and Sarge’s tell-tale halt at her side, but she was frigid at the fingertips and had let go of the lead. The resulting near-collision caught her breath in her throat, but it was followed by a rather embarrassed looking smile.
“No harm done.” Even if he hadn’t spoke, she would’ve known it was Derek: everyone in the house had their own unique scent--something Meg picked up on more subconsciously than anything, but it was still there. Also notice how she very smoothly avoided apologizing herself, even though he had no reason to.
She started peeling off the winter bundles that buried her thin frame, starting with the wool hat and scarf. “If you’re goin’ outside, hope you’re wearing layers.” Didn't matter if it was warmer than normal--Meg HATED being cold.
Derek watched Meg reveal herself from under her shapeless winter gear and hoped her voodoo powers couldn’t detect his gaze. “I was looking for you, actually.” Meghan paused, mid-loop of the overly long scarf around her neck.
“Oh yeah?” That was a bit unexpected. Still, the tone of his voice--though tense as always--wasn’t defensive or urgent. She ducked under the scarf and hung it from the rack (its location memorized--like everything else) and sent him a small, but welcoming smile. “Go lay-down, Sarge,” she quipped quickly to the dog, who seemed happy to oblige and headed for the fireplace. Meg started to shrug out of her coat. “What’s up?”
“I just - “ How to explain? He could feel a creeping sense of awkwardness. “I guess I was just looking for some company.”
“Oh...” Another surprise... Derek was full of them this afternoon, apparently. Her expression shifted to a subtle concern, hopefully it hid the mild confusion. “Yeah, that’s ...that’s not a problem. Lemme get untied here...” The coat came off, followed by the gloves, shoved into the pocket so she could find them next time. “You alright?”
Derek didn’t move to help with the jacket, knowing Meg could do it far more efficiently without him bumbling at her. “I’m fine,” he said, even though he wasn’t sure if he was. “Kind of a weird night. You hear about Alice?”
“Yeah... I think the whole house did.” Meg replied, more somber and commiserative. Poor Alice. Though she didn’t know the circumstances of the whole thing, Alice was much more of a friend to her than Jed was--hence the loyalty. Meg peeled her boots off and pushed them to the side with her foot, and made an attempt to smooth her hair. The freckles across her nose and cheeks were brightened by the bite of the wind, cherried pink, especially when she pushed her glasses up over her hairline.
Derek wasn’t sure if Meg was referring to Alice and Jed’s very public breakup or the day’s most recent development. “I caught her leaving last night.”
Surprise number four. Meghan’s face blanked as she turned it in his direction. She just stood there a moment, processing.
“What?”
“Yeah...” The awkwardness was back and Derek was relieved Meg couldn’t see his expression. “I let her go. Got who knows how far away before she turned around and came back. Tom found her asleep in the car this morning.”
“Jesus...” That wasn’t exactly great news. Meg’s brows arched high as she tried to roll through that mentally. She didn’t come down on him for letting Alice leave--it didn’t even come to her head. It was already full of worry for the other woman. “Well, is she okay?”
“She’s fine,” Derek answered with a shrug Meg couldn’t see. “Far as I know, she’s still sleeping.”
Meg made a mental note to check on Alice as soon as she was able, and she appeared a little lost in thought. At least she was fine, then... As fine as she could be. She shook her head and sighed a bit before turning a commiserative look in Derek’s direction. “So you wanna sit down or somethin’?”
“Yeah, sure. Parlor? The dog’s in there.” The fire was there and Derek figured she’d want to be near Sarge. He went and took a seat on the sofa. “I’m on the far left,” he told her.
“I can hear you,” she reminded him, trying to drag just a little lighter mood into the situation, and unsure if she was successful. Meg followed, running her hand along the wall by second nature, until she turned the corner of the couch and sat next to him. She sighed quietly, and started kneading the blood back into her fingers.
“Sorry I ruined your excuse to sit in my lap,” he answered back.
That caught her off guard, and Meg cracked a snickering laugh, though it faded away before too long. “I got a boney ass anyway.”
“All you white girls do.” He stared off into the fire for a moment. “I tried to tell Alice not to go.”
Meg angled herself toward Derek a bit on the couch, silent in thought, with her lips pressed lightly into a straight line across her chin. She listened to his tone, trying to filter through it to see just where is mind was at... which was sometimes really difficult with him. Finally, she breathed slow through her nose, and replied softly. “What did she say?”
“That she wanted to leave.” His voice was flat and even. “I couldn’t make her stay so I gave her my gun and told her I wouldn’t raise an alarm.”
“I guess it’s good she came back then.” What else could she say? It was just a big shock, and Meg hated being so unsettled. Maybe that was selfish of her, who knew.
Derek was quiet for a second, not bothering to give the obvious agreement. “Tom chewed me out for giving away my gun.”
Meg rubbed the back of her neck a little, disturbing the chaos of dark chocolate waves. She sighed through her nose, then scooted an inch or two closer to where Derek was sitting, and drew her palm back and forth between his shoulder blades, in aims to comfort. “Not much else you could’a done, is what it sounds like.”
Derek exhaled softly and his eyes fluttered shut. It was so rare to be touched and he could feel tension leaking out of him. “I know I’m supposed to be a people-hating jerk, but I couldn’t let her go out unarmed and get herself killed.”
Meg rolled her lips together, empathy striking inside somewhere deep. She knew he put up some pretty ugly defenses, and no one could blame him--but when Derek was really trying, she had always been able to feel how much things really did effect him. She maintained the gentle contact, and even gave him a little squeeze. “You did good.”
He snorted a little. No one else would tell him that and no one else would believe her. He was incredibly lonely sometimes. “I don’t know. I guess I felt like I owed it to you and Doc to help her.”
She was quiet for a moment, and the movement of her hand slowed, though it didn’t completely stop. The blue-green fog of her eyes was turned away at nothing, just listening to him before whispering soft, and low. “It’s not easy to watch, even harder to be stuck doing nothing.” She referred to the situation which Derek felt he owed her and Louisa for.
“I don’t like owing you for it.” He hated that they’d seen him so weak and broken down. Derek never wanted anyone to think of that when they thought of him. He’d rather be known as an asshole.
Now, her hand stopped, and Meg turned her face more toward him, whether he was looking at her or not. “It’s not ‘owing’ us, Derek. It’s friends looking out for each other--or if you wanna argue that, at the very least, it’s what decent human beings do.” She let her hand drop a bit, draping her arm behind him for another reassuring squeeze.
“I’m not a decent human being,” he pointed out.
“Actions prove otherwise.” Meg didn’t miss a beat. She rested her chin on his shoulder. “You’re traumatized, you’re vulnerable, and scared shitless. Just like the rest of us. Whether you admit it or not.”
Derek didn’t answer but he brought his arm up to wrap around Meg’s shoulders. She received the soft affection in kind, curling her fingers around his side.
“Doesn’t do anyone any good to keep torturing yourself. Least of all, you.”
“I’ll try to keep that in mind.” He was never good at letting go of things and this was no different. What else was he supposed to say?
Meg hesitated a little before saying anything, easily noting the skepticism in his voice. Of course, this was Derek. Skepticism and cynicism was required. Not that she blamed him.
“Good.” She said finally, and replaced the side of her head and hair on his shoulder, instead of the point of her chin.
Derek tried not to enjoy this too much, tried to remember that it couldn’t happen regularly because she had her husband to look after. But contact was so rare that he couldn’t bring himself to pull away.
“Any other pearls of wisdom you’d like to impart?”
“Don’t piss in the wind?”
“And don’t eat yellow snow?” he added.
“That too.” Meg smiled a bit and went back to rubbing his back.
Derek breathed deep. “Can we not talk about how traumatized and vulnerable I am?”
She nodded, though her hand slowed again. “Thought we were past it.”
“Right. For future reference.”
Meg smiled softly. “Got it, Cupcake.”