InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Says the one who uses "moar"."

Dean Winchester (cram_it_ugly) wrote in spinningcompass,
@ 2015-09-06 21:05:00

Entry tags:

!closed, dean winchester, ~claire novak

Who: Dean and Claire.
Where: Claire's place
What: Dealing with anger issues and damaged pride
When: After this.
Rating: Depends
Open: Nope
Status: on going

Dean had fully intended on just speeding through the city, gunning Baby's engine on the curves. And if he spotted Anders. But instead he found himself in front of her place, without knowing how he really got there. He sat in the car, though, the steady rumble of his beloved car's engine rattled beneath his fingers and his feet. AC/DC cranked up over the speakers.

Why did he bring this to her door? Maybe it was the memories of feeling absolutely elated yesterday. The ultrasound, the smudge, the heartbeat... He tried to grab onto those memories again. His throat felt thick, as he rocked his head back against the headrest.

Dean was half tempted to roll down the window and fling the damn phone out. Instead he settled for throwing it across the seat. Girls like Max was why he didn't bring them home. Max fucked everything up. How the hell had he got so... into her?!

He roared out his anger, fingers white knuckling the steering wheel. As he shook it. Before busting his fists against the metal frame of it, likely hitting the horn a time or two. Once the rage was out he settled against the wheel. White heat streaking down his cheeks.

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cram_it_ugly
2015-09-15 12:05 am UTC (link)

Dean wasn't sure he had been around Meg while she was carrying Rory, or not. That might have been a little strange. The thought of it showed on his face. "Right." The demon wasn't exactly in good graces with him at the point that he'd been taken.

Hell the thought of Cas having sex as an angel was still a little weird to him. Even if the evidence of his good genes were right beside him.

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angelhearted
2015-09-15 12:36 am UTC (link)

If Dean had voiced said weirdness, Claire would have commiserated with it- in spades. But right now, she was focused on what was right in front of her, both proverbially and literally. Without thinking, her free hand moved to his face- the hard angle of his unshaven jaw, where her thumb could lightly brush his cheek. She could feel the connection like electricity- softer, but deeper than even the first time they were together.

"I need you to be right with him," she finally said, barely above a whisper, but it was a heady one. Firm in her conviction, but more so- pleading. "However long it takes- I'll never push you. But I need you... and I need him." If Dean knew her even a fraction as well as she hoped, he'd know how hard it was for Claire to admit that point of weakness. "I won't split myself and this kid in half."

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cram_it_ugly
2015-09-15 06:04 am UTC (link)

"I'm not the one that betrayed him, Claire." Dean wasn't so sure he could come back from that. "Who chooses-" He cut himself off, as he jerked himself to sit up. He rubbed both hands over his face. "Look, I'm not going to come between you and him. I'm not like him. I'm not like her. I'm not asking you to pick sides." But he wasn't going to talk about Rory.

He ran his fingers through his hair, roughly, before settling the hand on the back of his neck. "I should go." He tugged the blanket from over his lap and stood.

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angelhearted
2015-09-15 06:32 am UTC (link)

"I never said you betrayed him-" Claire reiterated firmly, following suit when he sat up- and ignoring the small swing of vertigo that came with it. The doctor said her blood pressure was going to be on the low-side for a while. "He reacted to a shitty situation in a really stupid way and slammed a machete down on your last nerve- I get it, Dean..."

If anyone did, it was Claire. But Dean didn't remember the time when she saw him as the pinnacle of betrayal- a monster at the heart of all her pain. But she came back from that.

"But what are you gonna tell our kid when he asks why you and him won't speak." Not to mention what was she planning to do about explaining the whole Rory-brother, Dean-father thing. "You want to deal with that all because Rory didn't understand, and because of some ...chick who couldn't deal with her own crazy?"

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cram_it_ugly
2015-09-15 09:55 am UTC (link)

"He picked that chick over family. He picked her over me, after she'd been giving me a hard time because I didn't jump into bed with her." God that sounded strange coming out of his mouth. "That it was my fault she got sent away, and my fault that I'd got over her."

He balled up his fist for a hot frustrated minute. Instead of reacting as he usually would, he stepped into his boxershorts and hauled them out. There was one thing feeling exposed, another leaving all the bits hanging out.

"I'll figure something out, by the time they're old enough to ask, I'll figure something out." Dean backed up a step and sat heavily on the edge of the bed.

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angelhearted
2015-09-15 11:02 pm UTC (link)

Claire could've said a lot more on the subject- she wanted to, but intuition and a lot of personal projection kept her quiet. Her jaw set, teeth gnashing together for a moment, sighing through her nose. When he dropped back to the bed, she decided to let it go- for now. Maybe it was too soon.

Besides, there were other pressing matters.

Getting up to her knees, they creased the bed behind his hips as she flushed up behind him. His skin was still warm from her bed and she could smell her soap on him, especially when she draped her arms around him, and kissed the firm round of his shoulder.

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cram_it_ugly
2015-09-16 01:11 am UTC (link)

With a soft sigh he just sank against her, without really moving. "I'm sorry." It wasn't anymore than a murmur. The anger he felt about the whole situation was just too close to the surface.

Dean knew he'd made her a promise, but it wasn't something he could keep with this. Not yet.

He settled his hands lightly on hers. The embrace soothing him more than he would have expected.

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