InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Lizi rocks!"

Jason Grace | Percy Jackson (oursavinggrace) wrote in somerealityweb,
@ 2019-09-25 00:16:00

Entry tags:

active: freddy freeman, active: hope mikaelson, active: nico di angelo

I don't actually mind school that much. I mean, it's not that different than at home, you know? Since I wasn't living at Camp Jupiter anymore...

It's just...does any of this matter? I mean, if I get sent back home, I'm dead, so it doesn't really matter how well I do in school here since our time here is limited. Isn't it? I mean, can we stay here forever?

And it's super weird being treated like a kid here. Just saying.

[Nico]

You wanna get some coffee tomorrow afternoon sometime?

[Hope]

You doing okay?

(Post a new comment)

machinesrus
2019-09-25 09:55 am UTC (link)

I think of it like, home doesn't exist anymore so this place is all I got. Sure we could leave any day, but we could die any day too and we still live our lives with longterm plans and longterm goals. If you don't go to school in case it doesn't matter and it does, are you going to regret it more than if you did go to school and it didn't? What happens if you do stay forever? How long is long enough here to decide to treat it as real?

If you think you don't need school for the things you want to do longterm then whatever. If you want to do something that needs a high school education, stick with it.

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oursavinggrace
2019-09-25 06:17 pm UTC (link)

I'm not saying school isn't important. I know it is. I was in school back home, and I actually enjoyed it. I guess this is more about...facing my own mortality. Realizing I'm not even seventeen and my life is over the moment I'm back home. I mean, that's not so young for a demigod, but it's still...well, there was so much more I wanted to do with my time.

That, and I don't really know what I want to do. I was pontifex maximus back home, and I was working on something that seemed really important, but now...as far as I can tell, the gods aren't even here. I've never thought what I would do if I was just a normal human. I don't even know where to start.

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machinesrus
2019-09-25 07:28 pm UTC (link)

Oh yeah, I get that. Obviously not quite the same, I just turned 39 so I've had more time, but I feel like... I spent most of my life not doing the work I really wanted to do because I knew how it could be misused, I knew that it would be misused, and I didn't want that. So I spent all my time constantly keeping myself small and weighing up how what I did would impact on the world, and now it feels like... I never got to just live for myself. Then I get here and meet all these different people from different worlds and can't help but imagine how different my life could have been. Like I never got the chance to find out who I'd be without all of that pressure and responsibility. Half the time I don't even know how I feel. I don't like to think that this is just going to be some brief snatch of time that's going to disappear as soon as I try to grab hold of it.

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oursavinggrace
2019-09-25 07:34 pm UTC (link)

I mean, I've already done a lot, I guess. I was a praetor. I fought in the Titan Wars. I had my memory erased and completed a Quest with the Greeks. I was one of the Seven in the Prophecy of Seven. I've done things. I've loved people. I've hurt, I've had joy, I've been victorious, and I've lost. I've done more than most sixteen year old guys.

But...I'm not ready to die yet. I have so much more I want to experience. I want to actually...serve a purpose in the world. I want to help people.

I don't know, maybe I could teach Latin to little kids here or something.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	machinesrus 2019-09-25 09:38 pm UTC (link)
	I'm really liking the chance to actually work on projects without having to worry too much about the government getting hold of them. Some my own personal stuff, some things for other people. Feels good. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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oursavinggrace, 2019-09-27 02:35 am UTC

	Jason \| Hope baculum 2019-09-25 07:52 pm UTC (link)
	A lot better since those stupid frogs left. You sound like you're maybe not? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Jason \| Hope oursavinggrace 2019-09-25 08:37 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah, those things were definitely something, weren't they? Just...coming to terms with things, you know? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Jason \| Hope baculum 2019-09-25 08:42 pm UTC (link)
	Yea, I know. It's hard. Can I help? For what it's worth, I think you've already helped a lot of people back home, from what you've told me. Not that I think you should give that up or something, but your life has had meaning somewhere. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Jason \| Hope oursavinggrace 2019-09-25 08:43 pm UTC (link)
	I don't know. I mean, just listening to me is helping a lot. Yeah. I know it did, you know? I saved people, and I'm sure I made a difference. I guess I just feel selfish for not being ready to die yet. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Jason \| Hope baculum 2019-09-25 08:49 pm UTC (link)
	That's good, I'm always happy to listen. If that's selfish, all of humanity is pretty selfish. Not wanting your life to end is pretty universal I'd think. But you weren't ready and you did it anyway because you knew it was the right thing which sounds selfless to me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)