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Tweak says, "Daaaa Bears"

gwen (itsybitsyspidey) wrote in snapthread,
@ 2019-11-16 14:24:00

Entry tags:

gwen stacy, natasha romanoff (mcu)

WHO: Natasha Romanoff (MCU) & Gwen Stacy (Earth-65)
WHAT: Lady spiders being lady spiders
WHERE: Home
WHEN: Saturday lunch time
RATING: Low

One of the things about living in Starklandia that Gwen was still sort of figuring out was having free time. For her, it'd been a terribly unbalanced balancing act back home to figure out being a student, being a drummer in a band that had gone viral, spending time with her dad, and being Spider-Woman (which included a pretty intense array of duties in of itself including but not limited to running from the police). But here? She sort of had to make herself a routine. She didn't always stick to it. Some days she was just content to web up a hammock and laze about in it while reading a book. Other days she was bounding around the Spiderling jungle gym and skate boarding through town. Today, she'd spent most of the morning at Van Dyne's sorting cold weather clothes and getting Q-Tee to fold them. Now it was lunch time and though she often found herself at Pancho's so she could get a visit in with Alpha Peter, Gwen had gone home to make something for herself as well as anyone else if they were there.

It was kind of crazy and totally remarkable that they'd gone from a pretty bare bones sort of place without electricity to having functioning ovens and coffee shops and air conditioning and a lot of amenities that she hadn't expected would come to fruition given the way things had begun. Having a functioning kitchen was fantastic. Grilled cheeses sounded pretty great on a cooler day like that one was. So she was making some, fully intending on taking a couple over to Tony's workshop to drop them off for him if he was there, and maybe running them over to Mr. Roger's Gym if she found Steve there. And if she struck out with them, well, she'd find someone to give them to or maybe she'd just eat them because cheese was delicious and why not?

Having turned on the stove, Gwen waited for the butter to melt in the pan she was using while she got out the bread and sliced it, because Steve was so insistent that bead was better when it wasn't pre-sliced.

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alwaysactive
2019-11-21 03:51 am UTC (link)

On the surface Gwen just seemed nice, but there was much more to her than that, Natasha could see that there were so many other emotions hiding just under the surface and it just made her want to get to know Gwen more and learn what it was that she was holding on to so tightly like that. As someone who lived in a similar way she thought maybe it was something they could share a bit. And of course knowing that Gwen knew the other her as well was also something that made her endlessly curious as someone who hadn't known her before she'd come here it made Gwen a unique point of reference.

Nodding when Gwen admitted she'd cut herself off when things had gotten difficult for her, so she didn't have to fight quite so hard to keep the people she cared about safe and still do what she had to. She understood that only too well. She couldn't help but like Gwen immediately, her easy earnest honesty spoke plenty about her and of course she already had the Tony Stark seal of approval.

"So you're like Peter right? Spider-Woman?" She asked, curious about how that worked, the multiverse that flipped things like that on their head like that wasn't something she'd initially considered. "What else were you doing besides the hero thing before you got here?"

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itsybitsyspidey
2019-11-21 05:07 pm UTC (link)

"Yeah, Spider-Woman," she said. She hadn't done a lot of Spider-Things since she'd been in town. A few times it was necessary to suit up and put her skills to use, most recently in the forest and she'd unfortunately been without her suit but the webbing came in handy. She didn't talk much about her life outside of the super hero thing and being one of the many Spider-People. But Natasha, when she'd been here before, was the only person who she'd told everything to, other than Alpha Peter. Even Mr. Stark, though they were close as could be, she'd not divulged everything or how it made her feel. It was just easier to be here, to live day to day, and not think about the past.

At the same time? It was nice knowing that she had people who knew, who knew her and where she came from, and understood her. That was something she missed; something she hoped she could have with Natasha.

"I was in a band," she said. "An all girl band called The Mary Janes. I played drums. We were pretty good. One of our songs went viral online and we were getting a lot of gigs in New York. I kinda.. Well, the Spider-Thing sorta got in the way of that and the girls got pissed at me, thinking I was flaking on them a lot. I never really have been good at balancing the two lives I lead. It just got easier to cut off one life and live the other full time. Does that make sense?" She wouldn't make assumptions; just because she'd talked about this before, didn't mean she'd get the same response now.

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alwaysactive
2019-11-22 04:47 am UTC (link)

Natasha was curious about the world Gwen was from, she had questions about that too but she thought maybe it would be better to get to know Gwen first before she started grilling her on the place she was from and the differences between their two worlds. In truth she sort of wanted to do that with everyone she met here, to find out what they'd done differently, but this wasn't the time for something like that.

She could see Gwen in a band, she decided a smile on her face. "I like that name." It was sweet, and of course very fitting for an all girl band, and then Gwen went on, telling her how it had been difficult to balance the two sides of her life, and cutting herself off from one part to devote herself to the other. "Yes." She nodded, "Yes it makes complete sense."

"I'm not sure how much the other me told you about my life, I didn't get the choice about which part of my life I would be devoted to for the first part of my life, it was decided for me, and I was trained to be what I've become essentially, but more of a tool." She explained, maybe Gwen knew all of this already but she wanted to say it herself too. "And for years after that, even after I set out on my own I never really knew how to be anything more than the Black Widow that I was trained to be. It's easier." She agreed again, she knew it was because she'd lived it. "But it's not better." Gwen was still young, still figuring things out, she could still adjust things and make her life something more than just being the hero. She deserved that.

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itsybitsyspidey
2019-11-22 08:10 pm UTC (link)

Gwen wanted to know more about Natasha's world too. She knew bits and pieces, from talking with Tony, Steve, and Peter, as well as talking to the Natasha who'd been in town before. But there was always more to learn, and it would still be at least somewhat different coming from this particular Natasha. She might tell her things in a different way, add details she hadn't heard before. It just felt nice knowing that there was at least hope that she might gain a new relationship with someone she knew was amazing in so many ways. She wouldn't put that expectation on her, but to get the chance to start over and hopefully end up with a good friend and someone she could look up to was very promising for Gwen.

"It doesn't matter what she told me -- I mean, it totally matters, it was her story. But I want to hear it from you, your truth." Gwen wanted to make that clear. She nodded in understanding. She knew her choice to cut out the people she cared about wasn't the healthiest, or even the right thing to do. But it was safe, for them and even a little bit for her. If her enemies couldn't use people she was attached to against her, then they were safe, and she wouldn't have to make a sacrificial play and get herself killed for anyone and put that burden of grief on her loved ones either.

"I hope one day I can have both. I mean, if I end up going back. Sometimes, I get really conflicted over what I want to do. I know I should want to go back, but I don't think I do. I miss my dad, Aunt May, Uncle Ben, the girls. But I missed them before and I cut them all off. Here, I have so much to hold onto that I can keep and it's not hurting anyone. And even if someone I care about here was ever in danger, like Mr. Stark, I know he can take care of himself. I saw it-- I saw Iron Man and I know how strong he is. It's not as risky to get close to people here." She placed two of the sandwiches that had been in the skillet onto two plates, and used the spatula to cut them diagonally because that was best, and then offered one to her. "Sorry, that's a little deep. Too deep for an intro conversation."

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alwaysactive
2019-11-24 11:31 pm UTC (link)

Gwen might have been young, but she was assured in a way that Natasha couldn't help but admire, she had a sense of calm about her as she assured Natasha that she wanted to hear from her about her life as well, not just work on what she had been told in the past. "Then that's how we'll do this." She decided, she'd stop worrying about what Gwen may or may not know and instead just tell her what felt right.

That was a feeling that she understood only too well. "I think that's what changed things for me too," She admitted, with a quick thanks too for the sandwich that Gwen offered her. "Meeting Clint, the way he brought me into SHIELD, meeting Fury, finding a place in a team. It changes things to know others who can do this sort of thing that we do." Natasha might just be only human, but she put herself right in the mix like the rest of them. "Knowing that they were all capable as well, it makes it less of a burden to get close to them." She understood it and she didn't mind if it was deep for an introduction or not, it would be difficult for Gwen she was certain, to have known her once before, to have a level of intimacy and yet having to try and reset that now. She didn't hold it against her.

"I think going back isn't really an option for me, so I'm not really the sort of person who would ever judge you for wanting to stay too." She told her gently. "I'll miss people there, but - I think this is all there is for me now. It's a decision we all have to make for ourselves." She certainly wasn't going to tell Gwen she had go to back. And at this point Natasha wasn't certain it was something they would have any control over. It would happen or it wouldn't, so thinking about going back was more an exercise in understanding what you truly wanted.

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itsybitsyspidey
2019-11-25 11:19 pm UTC (link)

Gwen nodded. It was really nice that she understood that way of thinking. She knew that there were always going to be risks. Tony could still get hurt. Alpha Peter could too. Mr. Rogers, anyone she cared about. But they were capable of defending themselves, they at least stood a chance. They weren't just in the line of fire without having capability of combating the danger. Unless, of course, the danger was whatever it was that brought them here who could make them leave. That was the one thing none of them had any control over but for whatever reason, it hadn't stopped her from wanting to be close and closer to the people she'd grown to love. If anything she just wanted more time, more closeness, more everything.

"It's also good knowing that there's a level of understanding there. I mean, we've all been through the ringer, we've all felt what a thankless situation this role can be," she said. "We've all lost people, we've all felt these feelings, and we can relate. It's a shitty way to bond with someone but for people like us it's also kind of a relief to know you're not alone. God, I felt so alone back home, even with Captain America around, she and I weren't close. But here? It's great. And you're right. I think it is a choice we have to make for ourselves." She ate a bite of sandwich, then tilted her head. "Was it hard? When Clint found you and you became part of a team? Was it hard to go from operating solo to working with other people?"

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alwaysactive
2019-11-26 04:03 am UTC (link)

"Shared life experience," She agreed thinking of the way Steve had put it to her once before - he'd been stubborn then, refusing to see it in those who were already around him. "It's an important thing to find in others, and it's something people like us can never have enough of." She nodded. None of them shared exactly the same story, but like Gwen said they'd experienced a lot of the same things, even if it had happened in different ways. They could relate to one another in a way that they'd never be able to do with a stranger off the street. "Sometimes it doesn't matter the way you bond with someone, only that you have - and doing what we do, you can never have too many of those sorts of bonds." Natasha knew she was better for having forged those bonds herself, she was confident the same would be true for Gwen.

"So Captain America is a woman where you're from?" Natasha asked, curious now about that little bit of information Gwen had slipped in, how many other things were different, Gwen herself was a difference. These different worlds were more varied than she'd expected. Seeing a younger Tony had been one thing but Gwen's world seemed to have even more differences than that.

Nodding, "It was - strange." She admitted, "I'd been working on my own for a while at that point, picking up jobs I thought were interesting enough, carving out my reputation. And then came Clint." And he'd been, unlike anyone she'd known at that point in her life. He was skilled of course, but he was lacking the hardness she'd come to expect in those she'd run into. "I didn't trust anyone in the beginning, learning how to do that, how to allow someone to have my back, that not everything had to come down to me? Those were not things I was used to doing in the beginning. The team was - it was easier. I'd been working with Clint and Fury for several years at that point, I saw the larger picture. It made it easier to see what we were trying to build. It took a little longer for it to stop feeling like a job and start feeling like a family."

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itsybitsyspidey
2019-11-26 12:20 pm UTC (link)

Even though Gwen would never wish the hardships people like them went through on anyone, she would be the first to admit she was grateful that there were so many people in town she could relate to. It made it easier to get close, to know that she didn't have to be someone she wasn't. She could wear her web shooters everyday and not have to hide them. It helped; it helped a lot. It didn't mean she went around everyday seeking therapy sessions from those around her but she knew she could turn to people like Tony, Steve, Alpha Peter, and hopefully, Natasha sometime if she needed it.

"Yeah, she's -- she's a tough cookie. Samantha Wilson. Definitely a force to be reckoned with. She was part of an experiment called Project Rebirth. The Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes in my world were part of it too, with some other guy -- I never remember his name. Anyway, she was the one who they successfully made into a super soldier. She's been fighting the good fight since World War II. Steve Rogers draws comics about her life. A bit different than the history from your world, yeah?" Gwen liked that there were differences. It was very interesting. But she'd be lying if she said she didn't wish there were groups like the Avengers in her world.

That being said, she could relate to what Natasha was elaborating on. Fighting as a team, that wasn't as easy as it sounded. Gwen was so used to operating solo that she wasn't sure she'd be so great at relying on anyone else. Though, on the flip side, she and Tony had been pretty great at taking down those gross creatures in the forest. So maybe it wasn't impossible. She'd been part of a growing team of Spider-People back home before she'd been brought to town, but she hadn't actually fought with them all yet so that remained to be seen.

"I've heard stuff about the Avengers," she said. "It all sounds pretty badass, and I think it's great that you operate like a family too. You can all learn from each other, too." She laughed. "I learned how to fight watching videos on Kung Fu on YouTube."

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alwaysactive
2019-11-27 02:40 pm UTC (link)

There was a story there, about Samantha Wilson. Beyond the familiarity of the name, even if the form she imagined didn't quite match up to the reality she knew. But that was a story they could get to in time, for now she was a little more focused on Gwen and her own story. "Wow, yeah." She agreed shaking her head as she realized just how different things were where Gwen was from. "More than a little bit I'd say, so all of this - all of us, that's had to have been strange for you." She guessed. The multiverse was a strange thing, Natasha was learning all the time but it was so much more than she'd guessed and she supposed she was going to have to start expanding her expectations for these sorts of things.

"It was worth it though," She added of her own journey into becoming a part of a team. "I'm better now than I ever was on my own." She still had the chance to do things in her own way and her own time, but now she had the support of others when she needed it too. "Those off hours are easier to handle too with them all too." Because it wasn't just about someone to help you when you fought, sure it had started that way, a team to fight together in ways that others couldn't - but it had become something more than that.

"I don't think I would have survived the last five years without them." She admitted, their team had taken hits - they'd lost ... too many, and even some of those who had made it out to the other side were lost too in most ways. "They gave me something worth fighting for, and worth living for." And in the end something to die for too, and she'd have done it all again a million times over if she had to.

But she smiled, "It was a crazy sort of idea from the start, bringing us all together, but I've got to say Fury was on to something when he put the plan into action." As for Gwen's Kung Fu videos, Natasha couldn't help the quirk of her eyebrow, "Youtube? I - was that enough?"

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itsybitsyspidey
2019-11-27 07:36 pm UTC (link)

Gwen had a lot of stories, and she was positive that Natasha had her fair share of them too. And what she was hoping was that over time, they could both share them with each other. The good stories, the bad stories, the fun stories, and the difficult stories. She wanted to have a relationship with her that allowed them to be able to talk openly, confide in each other about things and share their life experiences. She'd looked up to Natasha so much before; she still did now, even if they were just getting to know each other. Not in a creepy, obsessive way, or in a way that put unfair expectations on Natasha to be some perfect heroine with no flaws. Gwen just thought she was great, and she wanted to get closer to her. Then they could share those stories, good or bad, and have a friendship they could both benefit from.

Sometimes she wondered how she'd do fighting with a team. If things were going to continue in the direction they'd been going in before she got here, she probably would've found out. Assembling multiple spider-people had been the agenda, but she'd wound up here instead. Even so, that was different than what the Avengers were. Having a clutter of Spiders was having a group who all operated very similarly. The Avengers were so eclectic, from what she could tell. All different and with different skill sets. Gwen liked that, though she wasn't sure how well she'd operate with it, being used to being alone for so long. Maybe that was why she gravitated to Natasha, because she understood what that was like.

"I'm glad you all found each other. That Fury guy, I guess he knew what he was doing by bringing you all together. I think it's great," she said. Going back to her fighting skills, she scratched the back of her head and laughed a little. "I mean, I haven't died yet. I think if I wasn't as durable taking hits, and if I didn't have my web shooters, I'd probably be in a lot more trouble." She was downplaying herself a little; Gwen wasn't bad at hand to hand, and she was very agile and graceful in her movements. But she lacked technical skill. Most of it was guessing and emulating moves she saw in videos. "You think you could show me some moves sometime? It's not like we're doing battle everyday but you never know when something like Las Vegas or those majorly creepy woods with the aliens will come back."

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alwaysactive
2019-11-27 09:34 pm UTC (link)

"Nick was -" She started and stopped, after Clint, Nick was probably the person she trusted most - he'd been a mentor to her and someone she knew was always looking out for her, even after it had become apparent that he hadn't entirely believed that she could be trusted in return. She understood it of course, the reason for secrecy, and she hadn't blamed him in the end. Losing him a second time though? It was a wound that still ached, even after five years - and even knowing they won. She hoped that meant he was back, that he didn't blame her too much for the choice she'd made - but she would never get the chance to ask him about it. She had to trust that he knew she did what was best for everyone. "He is one of the best men I've ever known and his plan was completely insane, but it was brilliant too." There had been plenty of people who had said it would never work, it was too far-fetched. But Nick had been adamant about making it happen, and in the end he'd done it. And they were all better for it.

She didn't know what the world would be if not for the Avengers, anymore than she knew who she would be without the Avengers. It was better for everyone that it had happened, that they had been there to save the world when they'd had to - and then avenge it when they hadn't been able to. Things were better because of them, she truly believed that, and maybe it made up a little bit for what she'd done in the past too.

As for Gwen though and her youtube moves? "Yes," Natasha said immediately, "Yes I think that's something we should do." She wanted to see what Gwen had learned on her own of course, but also help her to hone it and strengthen her. If they did go back Gwen wouldn't be going home to a team the way some of the others would by the sounds of it, she'd need to be as strong as possible if that day ever did come. "It's never a bad idea to be prepared, no matter what your day to day life is like." She agreed.

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itsybitsyspidey
2019-11-29 03:49 pm UTC (link)

"Some of the best ideas sound absolutely nutso before they come to fruition," she said, smiling. The idea of putting together a group like the Avengers definitely sounded crazy, but clearly the outcome had been something incredible. They'd saved so many lives, stopped so many end-of-the-world scenarios. Undoubtedly, this Nick Fury person was someone who was pretty fucking smart. She could tell by the way Natasha spoke of him that he was someone really special to her. Given what she knew of Natasha's past, he was probably someone who took a chance on her when not many others would, like the Clint in her world too.

Her eyes lit up a bit when Natasha agreed to help her learn to fight better. Gwen wasn't the worst but she could definitely use some actual teaching instead of watching actors fight and emulating it. She'd learned on her own along the way, used her instincts to know when to duck and when to hit back. But usually when she fought if it was hand-to-hand she was on the defense and hopefully she'd land some hits. "Really? Thank you," she said. While she wanted to spend time with her doing just casual things too, she thought training would be a good way to burn some energy and bring them closer together in a way that was non-conventional, and she liked that.

"Maybe sometime we can make Clint bake us a cake, eat it and talk more, too," she said.

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alwaysactive
2019-11-30 07:48 am UTC (link)

"I think that's probably that's exactly the way they teach some men how to go about creating plans." She admitted with a low laugh. The crazier the better, and sometimes it paid off in a big way, like the Avengers, like Tony had done with Iron Man, like their plan to beat Thanos for good, but for all the plans that worked out she knew there were plenty more that never did. "I just wish we'd been able to do more." Whether that had been stopping Thanos from the beginning or even solving more of the problems on their own planet before everything that had happened, they hadn't gotten the shot to truly make the difference she knew they might have been able to.

But all of that was over now - all there was for her was this place and she was going to figure out how to make her own kind of difference here. And maybe that stared with helping Gwen lay a more firm foundation, and if that was the case - well she could handle that. "Of course, it's been a while since I've done any real training, but I think I can remember how it's done." She smiled, this was what she'd wanted to do with the Avengers, their new recruits - she'd wanted to have real time with them for training, but they hadn't gotten quite enough of that either.

"Now that is a brilliant idea." She agreed, "I never knew him to be quite so eager to bake, but he seems to have embraced it here." She laughed a little. "It's only right that we give him the chance to do it a bit more."

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