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Werewolves. I believe that Severus' antipathy to werewolves was due to something he believed to be Remus’ betrayal. Remus had never tormented him. That would have meant a great deal Severus, as a lonely teenager. There are two times we read about Severus following someone and spying on them for his own ends. One is Lily, in the playground, (which naturally implies more such incidents.) The other is his spying on the Marauders.
The books speak of him hiding in the bushes, watching Lily with hunger. He was not a predator, but despite everything, despite planning and cunning, he was something much more innocent. He wanted a friend.
I believe it was in the same spirit that he watched the marauders. It is true, he was amongst a gang of Slytherins, who nearly all turned out to be Death-Eaters, but they were Slytherin. They were the powerful rich old families, pure-blood, wanting for nothing. The demands put on the neglected boy we see on the train must have been enormous, and they would have had to be hidden, must be demonstrated immediately even as they were developing.
How lonely he must have been, would have been, even had Sirius, James and probably others, not tormented him while their followers jeered.
He would have noticed Remus with them, shabby and poor as himself, another boy who would have been an outcast. He would have seen the apology in Remus' eyes, the awkwardness, the inability to prevent his friends, the disinclination to participate. Intrigued, he would have watched, noticed the illnesses, the absences, perhaps scratches and minor wounds. In his mind he would have conjured sympathy in Remus - not pity, but possibility of understanding, fellow-feeling, even... even friendship.
Remus regretted not preventing his friends from tormenting Severus and as good as called himself an idiot. But this was Remus' thought. Even Sirius and Dumbledore did not share it. Severus was bullied by the leaders in the school, and by extension an entire crowd. He would have been keenly aware that Remus had been reading during his worst memory, even more aware he was frowning. He would also have assumed with the same keenness of feeling that Remus would wished he was not bullied.
The whole school, and the world, from his earliest childhood, had been against him, save his shining Slytherins. A simple refusal to participate would grow and expand into an almost convincing illusion of understanding and warmth. Severus was not lost yet. There was no brand on his arm. He was free to make his own choices. I believe something in him was still tender and wistful enough to believe he could have that friend. I believe he was innocent enough to fool himself into believing Remus would have sat with him - talked, shared books, perhaps, ideas, sympathies - if only Remus had been free to do what he really wanted.
He would have watched and waited, thinking kindly too of a boy with secrets, poverty, pain. He would have dreamt as he had of himself and Lily, prepared himself again for an approach, ineptly. The day actually came, though the message was from Sirius.
Then came the Shrieking Shack fiasco. Sirius tried to kill him, and Remus was a werewolf, vicious, terrifying. , and they all stood against him, favoured. Even Remus. Dumbledore was perhaps the only one who could have redeemed him from the Death Eaters. He waved him away, treated him as nothing, protected his young lions. It was the end of many things for Severus, and I believe he channelled all his hurt into hate and rage and dismissal. I believe he swept Remus, and werewolves by extension into this, calling him a weapon, a danger even into adulthood, trying to convince himself.
Nevertheless, I believe the earlier truth wound itself into Severus' obsession. He was somewhat obsessed. Even before Remus came to teach, his third question to Harry, in his first ever class, was about Aconite, Monkshood, Wolfsbane. I believe those sad tendrils of hope still lived, though as melancholy, as mourning, as sorrow, as part of himself he had also lost. In my world, it is this spirit, almost of a past, ghostly Severus that infuses the Wolfsbane potion which he brews for Remus.
The books speak of him hiding in the bushes, watching Lily with hunger. He was not a predator, but despite everything, despite planning and cunning, he was something much more innocent. He wanted a friend.
I believe it was in the same spirit that he watched the marauders. It is true, he was amongst a gang of Slytherins, who nearly all turned out to be Death-Eaters, but they were Slytherin. They were the powerful rich old families, pure-blood, wanting for nothing. The demands put on the neglected boy we see on the train must have been enormous, and they would have had to be hidden, must be demonstrated immediately even as they were developing.
How lonely he must have been, would have been, even had Sirius, James and probably others, not tormented him while their followers jeered.
He would have noticed Remus with them, shabby and poor as himself, another boy who would have been an outcast. He would have seen the apology in Remus' eyes, the awkwardness, the inability to prevent his friends, the disinclination to participate. Intrigued, he would have watched, noticed the illnesses, the absences, perhaps scratches and minor wounds. In his mind he would have conjured sympathy in Remus - not pity, but possibility of understanding, fellow-feeling, even... even friendship.
Remus regretted not preventing his friends from tormenting Severus and as good as called himself an idiot. But this was Remus' thought. Even Sirius and Dumbledore did not share it. Severus was bullied by the leaders in the school, and by extension an entire crowd. He would have been keenly aware that Remus had been reading during his worst memory, even more aware he was frowning. He would also have assumed with the same keenness of feeling that Remus would wished he was not bullied.
The whole school, and the world, from his earliest childhood, had been against him, save his shining Slytherins. A simple refusal to participate would grow and expand into an almost convincing illusion of understanding and warmth. Severus was not lost yet. There was no brand on his arm. He was free to make his own choices. I believe something in him was still tender and wistful enough to believe he could have that friend. I believe he was innocent enough to fool himself into believing Remus would have sat with him - talked, shared books, perhaps, ideas, sympathies - if only Remus had been free to do what he really wanted.
He would have watched and waited, thinking kindly too of a boy with secrets, poverty, pain. He would have dreamt as he had of himself and Lily, prepared himself again for an approach, ineptly. The day actually came, though the message was from Sirius.
Then came the Shrieking Shack fiasco. Sirius tried to kill him, and Remus was a werewolf, vicious, terrifying. , and they all stood against him, favoured. Even Remus. Dumbledore was perhaps the only one who could have redeemed him from the Death Eaters. He waved him away, treated him as nothing, protected his young lions. It was the end of many things for Severus, and I believe he channelled all his hurt into hate and rage and dismissal. I believe he swept Remus, and werewolves by extension into this, calling him a weapon, a danger even into adulthood, trying to convince himself.
Nevertheless, I believe the earlier truth wound itself into Severus' obsession. He was somewhat obsessed. Even before Remus came to teach, his third question to Harry, in his first ever class, was about Aconite, Monkshood, Wolfsbane. I believe those sad tendrils of hope still lived, though as melancholy, as mourning, as sorrow, as part of himself he had also lost. In my world, it is this spirit, almost of a past, ghostly Severus that infuses the Wolfsbane potion which he brews for Remus.
crushed
Part 1
I also can see Sev and Lupin becoming friends of some sort under different circumstances - say they were both in Ravenclaw, for instance. They're both intelligent, with a bent towards analyzing things logically; they do seem to have a shared interest in learning about magic, and value doing well academically. Etc. A fic like that would be very interesting to read.
However, I tend to agree more with those who argue that once Lupin was taken up by the Marauders, any sense of fellow-feeling with or desire to connect with Lupin on Sev's part would have declined. 'My' Severus (how I read his character, that is) can be rather dualistic in his thinking at times, and I think that once Lupin connected himself with James and Sirius and started taking part in some of their activities, Sev would have mentally checked him off as being in the "enemy" category, though perhaps not the "mortal enemy who shall die a slow painful death" category. It seems that Lupin was involved to some degree, if I read the signs in canon coherently. Though I do agree that the Shack incident would have sparked a feeling of betrayal in Severus, in that (believing Lupin 'in' on it all) the member of the group who had been the least active and vicious of his tormentors apparently had as little regard for his life as the other Marauders.
Part 2
My take is somewhere between the two: I think in that scene he's reacting at least partly out of that wariness RE Harry. But I think that, deep down, he does harbor a certain degree of horror and fear of werewolves, though he doesn't let it take him over. I think that this is partly due to the sheer traumatic impact of that moment in the Shack when he was confronted - not with "Lupin" in any recognizable sense, but with a snarling, vicious monster - the kind of thing that, even if you manage fine most of the time, can occasionally pop up in a nightmare from which you wake screaming.
And partly, I think, (especially later on) it's due to a sense he has that he himself is, in a way, a kind of werewolf - appearing to be a normal human being and capable of civilized behavior most of the time (when he chooses), but at times taken over completely by something more primal and vicious that leads him to hurt others and do things he later regrets immensely (his hatred and anger). There's an essay floating around (I'll have to find it) that he's a "spiritual werewolf," and I think this is heading in the right direction.
Part 3
For now, I guess I think his first, but short-lived, reaction would be denial: an unwillingness to face this fate at all. After a short time (at most one month), though, he'd grimly accept that this is reality, and move over into a feeling of rage - at the werewolf who turned him, of course, but also at the universe for giving him one more giant piece of s**t like this to deal with, casting him still further outside of 'normal' society and possibly messing up his spying work for the order. Eventually he might come to terms with it, but I think he'd need someone to support him - someone who, crucially, really understood his pain - another werewolf (Snupin shippers: go wild!) Given this support, I could see him turning his anger into something constructive, pouring his energy into finding a cure or improving the Wolfsbane. And I think he would also eventually be able to relate to Lupin better, to admit that this is something he could not have completely understood before, but should have attempted to respect (rather than condemning Lupin for something he couldn't help).
Just my thoughts. ;) Thanks, Janus and all above, for your thoughtful responses to the topic I suggested (and am only now getting 'round to tackling myself).
Cheers,
00sevvie
Re: Part 2