InsaneJournal

"The Top Button is the Only Thing Standing in the Way of Chaos, Potter"
Title: "The Top Button is the Only Thing Standing in the Way of Chaos, Potter"
Author: atypicalsnowman
Pairing: Severus/Harry
Rating: R
Word Count: 923
Warnings: Glitter? Idiocy on part of the author?
Summary: Harry takes Severus to a gay club. You know, for fun.
A/N: Thanks to lemondropseven and lovetoseverus for the beta. This was thought of while clubbing in downtown Austin. *dusts glitter off Severus* The title is ridiculous because this ficlet is ridiculous. It should be mentioned that lovetoseverus was a good beta and tried to talk me out of it.



"I feel severely underdressed."

Harry sighed. "You're wearing a white buttoned shirt and trousers. Just because you're not wearing five layers doesn't mean you're underdressed."

Severus fingered his open top button and glared.

"Merlin," Harry muttered, running a hand through his hair. "Look, let's just do this the one time. If you don't like it we never have to do it again."

"I don't see why we're doing it in the first place. I. Don't. Dance," Severus pronounced slowly, poking Harry with his bony finger on every syllable.

"Neither do I! But it'd be nice to be able to kiss you and touch you in public without having people glare at us."

"You can both kiss and touch me here." Severus thought about it for a moment, then said, "Right now."

"Just humor me, will you?" Harry said, not above pleading. "This will be fun, I just know it."

"Somehow I doubt that."

*

"That man is in a cage!" Severus shouted over the music, his eyes wide. "And he's wearing a nappy!"

Harry grabbed Severus' face and returned his attention to him. "He's a dancer, Severus. He's supposed to dress like that. He gets better tips."

Severus turned his head again, and his eyes went wider. "He also has a prominent erection."

Harry groaned and took Severus' hands, trying to move a bit to the music. "Those are just his pants."

"To what sort of place of ill repute did you bring me, Potter?"

Harry sighed and pressed himself against Severus, hoping to distract him from what even he admitted was a flashy club with his own prominent erection.

"Just pay attention to me, okay?" he said, running his hands over Severus' chest, then down to squeeze his arse. Severus froze for a moment before looking around, noticing that everyone else was engaged in similar acts.

They kissed and swayed along to the music for a few minutes, and Harry never felt more free in his life. He broke the kiss with a happy sigh, and thrust his cock against Severus'.

The moment was lost when pink glitter rained down from the ceiling, covering Severus' still slightly-greasy hair.

Harry was barely able to cover his snort before a pink-coated Severus glared at him. The resulting burst of laughter was followed by Harry grabbing Severus by the shoulders as he tried to elbow his way through the drag queens to the door.

*

"Why did that man roll his eyes when I asked for a scotch?" Severus asked before his eyes went wide at Harry's drink. He grabbed it and said, "There's no way this can be safe for consumption."

"It's just fun, Severus," Harry said, taking out a glittering glow stick. "Try something different for a change."

"It's pink," Severus said, then poked it with his wand.

"Put that away!" Harry said, putting Severus' wand back in his pocket. While he was there he stroked Severus' half-hard cock through his trousers. "This wand on the other hand..."


*

"I don't understand what was wrong with this smitten woman—"

"Gaga," Harry corrected.

"Hmm. But if her affair was going poorly why did she not end it?"

"Ugh. It's just a song."

"I'm not sure I understand this place."

"Oh, really?" Harry muttered to himself as he watched Severus watching the dancers. He was pants at dancing, but it might have been nice...

"This isn't really dancing," Severus said with a sniff. "I'm not sure what this is, but I'm sure it's not dancing. Why are they doing it?"

"Cause it's fun...I think," Harry said with a sigh. He watched Severus regard him curiously before taking another sip of his drink.

*

Severus never did dance, but he did tap his foot to the beat through at least three songs. To Harry, that was a miracle in itself; he had never seen Severus' foot tapping look anything but impatient.

As they arrived home Harry felt like the night had been a bit trying, but he hadn't had too horrible a time. Somehow he doubted Severus would ever want to go again.

"Harry," Severus said, clearing his throat, "do you really enjoy such places?"

Harry shrugged. "Not all the time, but every once in a while..." He drifted off as he saw Severus frown. "It's not a big deal. I mean, it is silly."

"I don't think I could ever allow myself to...revel in that sort of abandon," Severus said, his tone tinged with regret. "My dignity is one of the few things in life I've been able to keep in tact—" he said, holding up a hand to stop Harry from protesting that wasn't all he had, "and I'd like to keep it that way."

Harry nodded, knowing that taking Severus to a Muggle gay club had probably been asking too much.

Severus' cough and soft mutter brought Harry from his thoughts and he asked, "What did you say?"

"I said," Severus said, only slightly louder, "that there are some mild inhibition potions that...may be of some interest to us. If I am allowed to Obliviate all the party-goers before we leave. And if you swear—"

"Yes!" Harry said with a smile. "As if anyone would believe me." He wrapped his arms around Severus' waist and said, "It's okay to have a little fun sometimes."

"Hmm," Severus hummed, taking Harry into his arms. "I'm still trying to understand the significance of a meteorological event in homosexual culture."

"Ugh," Harry groaned.

"Is there a Biblical significance or is the prism a metaphor for a cock—"

And then Harry kissed him, simply to shut him up.