I agree. I tend to think that most of the people that find problems with the writing/storylines (including my little, troll-ey friend) tend to be the same people that just hate the deal with Mephisto so much it colors everything they have read in the comic since. I'm not saying there aren't problems (and for the record I could write a book on the deal with Mephisto -- not the least of which is the fact that there HAS to be a more significant payment for Pete and MJ, than the dissolution of their marriage. I'm talking, Old Testament, dogs living in sin with cats-type payment, here.) -- there are. But, there are people who parse every sentence and from that make the most deplorable assumptions .... Sorry, rant over.
Anyhoo, I agree with you that a big part of being a superhero, would be either A. Always lying to your friends/loved ones or B. Tell them and have them worry themselves into an early grave. To me it would be even worse for them than being a the loved one of a cop -- as the whole sent to another dimension thing would be even worse.