When Alan Moore was crap (Spawn/WildCATs, Part 1)
Continuing the look through the sub-par stories Alan Moore produced during his mid-90s slump... *** You've seen the rest*, now see the worst.
This.. I'm not sure how to describe this mini-series. I really wanted to like it. Moore's run on the WildCATs series proper, which I'd read before this, is genuinely good stuff, so I know he the ability to turn out good stories using these characters. However, I ended up really disappointed. This story isn't just bad by Moore standards. It's bad by anyone's standards, and mind-bogglingly so. Normally, even when a Moore story is bad, it's still original or distinct. Whatever else, he's never generic. A voice always shows through. This series, in contrast, is the very definition of generic.
There are plenty of Alan Moore work I've never read, but even so, I'd feel pretty safe betting that this is the worst thing he's ever written professionally. I mean, this is the sort of thing where, if it was written by a new writer, you'd do your hardest to avoid any future works by the guy because there is so little skill apparent here that you'd be positive the person's a lost cause. It's almost comforting in its way: The knowledge that Moore is really is just as capable as anyone else of scripting utterly uninspired schlock B-movie dialogue on an off day.
*Well, I skipped the Fire From Heaven crossover because I'd forgotten about it and didn't remember until I'd already begun composing this entry.
On Earth, Spawn attacks the WildCATs, claiming they attacked him first. But then he realizes that these WildCATs aren't the same ones he fought.
The fake WildCATs show up at the real WildCATs' headquarters.
The newcomers explain that they're from the future.
The Ipsissimus takes over Earth. The future WildCATs send two of their own back in time to prevent it from ever happening.
I'm not sure how this series wound up so bad. I mean, the ingredients here seem like they could make something good. Moore's run on WildCATs proved that he can produce good stuff with that cast. The origin of the amulet at the beginning of the story is genuinely pretty cool. And given Moore's interest in the occult and his clever imagination, you'd think story about a post-apocalyptic future overtaken by demons from hell would be the sort of thing he could knock out of the ballpark.
But no. Instead, what we get is a parade of every single cliche that exists for this time of story.
Future-Spawn's minions locate and attack the base. The heroes escape by teleporting to a section of the rebel-held tunnel systems.
They head toward the Chrystler Building, which is future-Spawn's headquarters. It's America's new seat of government after the destruction of the White House. Future-Spawn named it the Red House.