Well, the problem with the timing of bring Jason back was that it was an effect of Infinite Crisis.... and the Bat-family was dealing with the shitstorm of IC all over the place. So, what basically happened is that we got the images of Bruce brooding a lot in the cave, while Bludhaven was blown up, Teen Titans were dying left and right, and just over all no plots really had TIME to let the characters think, "Wow, Jason's really back..."
Which sucks, because I agree with you that it would have felt more "real" and less gimicky. I'll post some Dick/Jason interactions that deal with SOME family issues next post, but basically every Dick, Tim, Jason interaction involves them beating the shit out of each other. No Bat-family hugs! Heck, not even a Bat-family pat on the shoulder and a "even if you're acting evil, we're glad you're alive bro." Just "OMG, he's killing people! Eeeeeevil!" Sigh...