Spencer Hastings thinks you need a babysitter (worry) wrote in salemscenes, @ 2016-05-02 19:34:00 |
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Entry tags: | spencer hastings (little_liar) |
Who: Spencer and Hanna
What: Spencer checks in
Where: Hanna's bedroom
When: Nowish
Spencer hadn't spoken to Caleb in days now. It felt all wrong, it felt horrible. It was hardly the first fight she had with a boyfriend. She and Toby used to fight all of the time and sometimes would spend a long time separated from one another. That was how guys like Dean and Johnny had managed to sneak into her life. She didn't regret those experiences away from Toby either but they always felt like the world was ending when they happened. Spencer wasn't a teenager anymore but she felt like one again. She couldn't help but feel like that was partly Rosewood to blame. Maybe if she didn't want to feel like a teenager she shouldn't have moved back to Rosewood and started hanging out with her old crew again. Maybe if she didn't want to feel like a teenager, she shouldn't be dating a guy she had crushed on when she was one.
Okay, fine. Spencer would admit it. She crushed on Caleb. It was innocent though. She thought he was cute and smart because he was. He was also undeniably Hanna's boyfriend so that made him off limits and Spencer had been (usually) happy with Toby back then anyway. It was a stupid crush back then. But now they were adults and trying to have adult relationships and Spencer felt herself sliding backwards.
She was angry at Hanna and it was unfair because Hanna wasn't actually here. How could she be angry at the Hanna that was here? That Hanna hadn't told Spencer it was okay to date Caleb, she wasn't engaged to some hot Australian guy and she hadn't cheated on said hot Australian guy with Spencer's current boyfriend. But Spencer couldn't deal with it. If Hanna had a problem with Spencer and Caleb, why hadn't she said something from the beginning? Because Spencer never would have gone there without Hanna's permission.
Probably. Right? Maybe. Ugh. She knew that she was letting her big sister in her head but was Melissa wrong? Spencer did have a bad habit of kissing her sister's boyfriends. Hanna was sort of like a sister but her bond with Hanna was so much stronger than her bond with Melissa. At least, Spencer had thought it was until Hanna made out with her boyfriend.
She knew that avoiding the girls wasn't going to make things better with Caleb. It was one thing to avoid him, but it wasn't fair to Emily, Alison or Hanna to avoid them. Maybe if it was Hanna from back home. Spencer had some choice words for her. Then again, Hanna back home had been kidnapped by A.D. and might be dead now. Now Spencer just felt like a horrible person.
I trust Caleb. Hanna's voice had been so vehement when she said that, almost accusatory. Of course, Spencer trusted Caleb too. He was her boyfriend. Why the hostility? Sort of like how she hadn't been able to understand why Caleb had snapped at her about bringing Mona along. Like she would bring Mona anywhere. Suddenly she was feeling vindictive enough to make Mona her new best friend but not even Spencer was that crazy. Yet.
Avoiding the girls wasn't the answer. Emily was busy at The Cafe. She had her own band of new friends and Spencer had the sneaking suspicion that Emily was seeing somebody because she seemed almost too distracted to notice that Spencer was avoiding her. Ali had her family here, she had Charlotte and Jason. It hadn't taken her long to stake her claim on Jason as her brother even though she shared him with Spencer. One of these days Spencer would have to remedy that situation too but she could only fight so many battles at once. She was definitely avoiding Toby who had spotted trouble in paradise long before Spencer had and she didn't want to give him the satisfaction. Not that she thought Toby would take satisfaction in her pain, even now. Her thoughts about the people in her life spoke more to Spencer's own negativity than theirs.
That was why after she was done "learning" with Katherine for the day, she decided to go and find Hanna and see how she was doing. The younger girl had been acting erratic ever since Angelus had tried to tear her throat out. Spencer fought with her PTSD on a daily basis and hers was a bit farther back than Hanna's. The experience of the dollhouse was fresh for Hanna still and while Spencer remembered it vividly, time did seem to help.
She suspected that Katherine had a little too much fun beating the crap out of her but Spencer took it in stride. Katherine hadn't seriously hurt her and Spencer felt stronger every time they worked together. Even though she was covered in bumps and bruises, Spencer felt stronger and more ready to take on Angelus if he came around looking to hurt Hanna again. She didn't know how she could want to murder someone and protect them at the same time. Spencer's relationships were complicated.
When nobody answered the door, Spencer let herself in and headed to Hanna's room. She was unsurprised to find her best friend louging in bed, stuffing her face with popcorn and reading a fashion magazine.
"Hey," Spencer said softly as she sat on the edge of the bed, one long leg folded gracefully underneath her. "I brought you a coffee. Extra foam." Spencer set down the cup on Hanna's nightstand. She made it a point to know all of her friend's coffee orders. Coffee was very important to Spencer.