Simon Lewis (downworlders) wrote in salemscenes, @ 2016-08-24 21:36:00 |
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Entry tags: | raphael santiago (bloodsocold), simon lewis (daylighting) |
Who Simon & Raphael
What Simon continues to struggle with what he is
Where Park/Woods
When Tuesday Night
Warnings Doubt it
Status Ongoing / poke us to interject
It was chilly out tonight, he wasn't sure why he felt like it was, he couldn't feel anymore. Looking down at his phone he starred at the bunch of numbers he had. There was Alec, Magnus, and then of course there was Clary. His thumb rested on top of her name for a long moment as he sat there in the park. The bench was left just to himself in this late hour, and the taste of iron was still on his tongue. His blood stained clothes were covered with a flannel so not to stand out. It wasn't human of course, but what did that matter? He couldn't even tremble from the horrible thing he had just done. He was disgusted with himself His thumb moved away from calling Clary and he'd gotten angry with himself for not being to able to press it. To reach out for her, to reach out for help. His fangs bare as he growled angry at himself and his own self-loathing ways. How was he ever supposed to be okay with being this, this sort of monster that has no sense of control. Simon couldn't even remember when or how he had lost it while he was out running. He just wanted to clear his head and the next thing he knew he was just....it was too horrible to even think about. He wanted to hurt himself, he wanted to wait in the park until the sun came up and wanted it all to be over with. He missed Hannah, and then Clary, and now? Who was there? Raphael? What was he going to do besides yell at him for having no control or common sense. Maybe something else and throw in a remark that would just make his own blood boil again. So what, so he could attack his clan leader? He doubted Raphael even wanted anything to do with him after the last time. After seeing how he acted when there was no sun....what if it happened again, what if he couldn't stop or be stopped. There was so much to think about, so many variables to consider. Maybe it was just too much. |