InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I am the vampire Armand"

blonde bombshell (erynflynn) wrote in rp_tutorials,
@ 2012-04-24 16:29:00

If I've asked this before I'm sorry. I need help on my facts which I'm changing it to public so you can look at it and give me pointers on how to make it more detailed. I'm doing this b/c I've been rejected by two different groups and thinking its b/c of my bio. HELP PLEASE!!

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evaakeru
2012-04-25 06:48 pm UTC (link)

First off...did none of the mods of these games indicate what the issue was with your application? You intimate that they did not but I certainly hope that isn't the case.

Second..What you've got feels like a 'cliff notes' version of her life. You could basically stick a bullet in front of each blurb you have which would almost make it a timeline of important dates. Tell us a little story of her life/history; give a bit more insight/feeling into those moments that have shaped her up to current.

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cataleia
2012-04-27 10:59 pm UTC (link)

I think your bio is great for a comm that says 'small bio/ # bullet points' for a more traditional bio/comm I think you need a lot more. I'm not suggesting you HAVE to do one of those nifty scribbld layouts but take into account what people include ie: personality, basic details, quick facts, actual bio.

I think if you took what you had, turned it into a more paragraph formed biography then added a seperate blurb about her personality, some small basics to begin with; name, dob/age, occupation, hometown, etc, added in maybe a section on her appearance (totally option) and then gave a run down of quick facts; *likes tacos but hates burritos, *is a horrible slob and knows she needs to clean better, things like that. I think you'd see a change in mod approval. That said, ONLY if they think the bio is the issue, reading it, you have a lot of detail but like the person above me said, it's more of a timeline not a bio. I really hope this helps!!!

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	erynflynn 2012-04-28 06:22 pm UTC (link)
	Is there a fact guideline anywhere around? I'm almost thinking about a scribbld layout. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

cataleia
2012-04-28 10:27 pm UTC (link)

None that I'm aware of. I'd say just find one through a PB comm, look at a few peoples' in the comm you want to join and see what they did. The type of information they put in and keep it in mind. Always be willing to tweak your own way. Do you like to delete appearance but add facts? Do it. Do you like to get rid of personality but have likes and dislikes? Do it. Just kind of get an overview.

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theseaward
2012-04-28 04:23 pm UTC (link)

I would just suggest fleshing it out a bit. I know the fact based app is pretty common but it should still give off an idea of who the character is and not just what happened to them. For example in this one:

Eryn’s father left before she was born, so she was raised by her mom Rebecca who had to take two jobs just to give Eryn the food and clothing that she needed to live. It was tough but they made it through with the help of Eryn’s aunt.

You could add a bit more about how that directly affected Eryn. Was she always kind of sad about this? Did she always wonder what her Dad was like, did she hold anger and resentment toward him for abandoning the family? Did it make it hard for her to trust men later in her life. That kind of thing.

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