220 Comic Shop, Justin and Michael - When Brian reveals the Rage party and ads he’s bought, I actually think I see something different from Justin than his being pleased with Brian. Instead, I thought he was visibly disappointed. Rage was one thing that he was doing on his own without Brian’s help, but Brian couldn’t keep his hand out of it. And in Justin’s vulnerable state, he sees this as Brian thinking that he can’t succeed without his help. Great confidence booster… not. Oh, Brian. Even when you try to do the right thing, you get it wrong.
Ted and Emmett throughout - I love Ted, I really do. But in this episode, he totally makes me want to crawl out of my skin. I feel so completely uncomfortable watching him fawn all over Emmett. It’s not that I’m anti-Ted/Emmett, it’s just Ted’s behavior in this episode that makes me cringe.
Michael and Ben throughout – Here we have a clear picture of what a caring, giving, honest relationship is like. They become almost the gold standard in this episode for how to do it right, and they stand out in stark contrast to Brian and Justin, who painfully demonstrate how to do everything wrong.
Ethan’s apartment, Justin and Ethan They’re quarreling over Brian, and Ethan totally reveals his true self here letting Justin know that he has to put his career ahead of love. It may sound like he’s just trying to be hurtful, but if Justin would only listen, if he could only see with clarity, he’d know that this is the real Ethan.
The loft, Brian and Justin I die a little when I see that Brian’s been waiting up for Justin. And when he pulls the covers back *sob* he’s letting Justin know that he still has a place here, with him. But even though Justin crawls in beside him, I think there’s significance in the fact that his back is turned. They’re both so lost. Neither one of them knows what to do at this point, only that they are hopelessly broken.
Comic Shop, Michael and Justin - Here Justin acknowledges how angry he is at Brian for interfering with Rage. He’s really expressing the frustration that he feels for how he sees Brian always having to come to his rescue and take care of him. Michael tries to remind Justin about it in a positive light, but for Justin at this point, it’s all controlling and manipulative. He’s too angry to see the love in any of the actions that Michael mentions or to separate out the control from the caring. Interesting that he says to Michael that Brian doesn’t love him whereas with Ethan he acknowledged that Brian does love him, in his own way.
Babylon - I agree that I can never quite figure out what’s up with Mel and Lindsay telling Justin that Brian’s looking for him. I agree that if Brian was orchestrating something, he would have done a cleaner job than that. *shrugs*
And of course we have Brian fucking himself, both figuratively and literally as he fucks Rage with Justin watching. Which, btw, I do think he knows that Justin is there. And he’s sending the message to Justin again, just in case he needs a final reminder. “This is who I am. I’m not changing for you or for anyone. Accept me or not. It’s your call.”
A second interpretation of the Rage fuck is that Brian has decided that Justin would be better off if he left, but he knows that Justin doesn’t have the strength to walk out for good. So here he gives him that final push, not leaving Justin with much of a choice in the end.
And, as Justin is leaving with Ethan, Brian raises his mask, again figuratively and literally, revealing his true self to Justin. The expression on his face is haunting, sad, resigned and full of love. At least I see the love there. Above everything else, he wants Justin to be happy.