InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Not without you."

Asterion }} The Minotaur (asterius) wrote in nevermore_logs,
@ 2023-01-17 22:42:00

Entry tags:

asterion, erato

WHO: Asterion and Erato
WHEN: Tuesday evening
WHERE: Erato's
WHAT: Asterion feels funny
WARNINGS: TBA - but fight ring trauma

Asterion had been tasked with finding the location - or at least clues - where the fighting ring which had held him captive was operating now. And for a long time there had been nothing at all. Asterion had spoken to the few survivors he new and kept in touch with, though none of them would call him their friend. And they too didn't seem to have any clue where the ring was operating from.

And Asterion knew he wasn't clever enough to figure things out in any kind of covert, sneaky way. That just wasn't the person he was. So he waited, and built up his relationships with the men who had suffered the ring with him, and finally, finally there was news.

One of the men who had been held at the same time as him, it turned out, occasionally worked to help the newly released captives find their way back to the real world. He only admitted this to Asterion over far too many drinks at a bar. And when Asterion mentioned he wanted to bring the entire thing down, his acquaintance was on board.

So now Asterion had the information, but there was an unfamiliar feeling in his guts when he thought about that place. It made him uncomfortable. What in the hell was it? What was wrong with him?! It got so bad Asterion decided to go to one of the only people he actually trusted in the world, and ask her about it.

Which was how he found himself buzzing up to Erato's apartment on a Tuesday night, his belly full of acid and horror.

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	passionburning 2023-01-18 10:44 am UTC (link)
	She gave him a smile, though her eyes remained troubled. "I am happy you have friends, sweetness. And it is good that you have such conviction. It sounds like an awful place. But..." She paused, trying to decide what to say, how to phrase it. "It's not weak to know your limits. Do you know what I mean?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	asterius 2023-01-18 10:47 am UTC (link)
	Asterion nodded slowly, considering that. "So you're saying," he said, trying to make sure he had this right, "I feel gross because of what happened to me? Could it get worse if I keep doing this?" Was Erato worried about him? All of a sudden it wasn't his guts that felt weird, it was his chest, and he didn't know what to do with that either. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

passionburning
2023-01-18 11:05 am UTC (link)

"It could, if you're not careful." Erato looked down at her mug, her mouth twisting to one side. He was so naïve of his feelings and his trauma, it was kind of endearing. "You know how I cannot sleep without a night light, and how I cannot work right now? I know where my limits are. I don't want to make myself scared." She looked at Asterion then, sad eyes watching him. "Is that how you feel, do you think? Scared?"

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asterius
2023-01-18 11:08 am UTC (link)

Asterion's face twisted and he opened his mouth to say 'I'm not scared of anything' back, but something stopped him. It was a bald-faced lie. He was terrified of the unyielding dark, and of enclosed spaces and locked doors, and most of all he was scared of that monster he knew he could be if he let himself.

"Yes," he finally admitted. It was the truest form of trust for Asterion, to admit any vulnerability. He hated showing weakness, because it could be exploited, and so this meant he knew Erato would never use it against him. "Yes, I feel scared. I didn't think I did. But I do."

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passionburning
2023-01-18 11:24 am UTC (link)

Erato sniffed, and rubbed the tip of her nose, feeling tears spring to her eyes. She had to blink them away, not that she was ashamed of her emotions, but just that she felt touched by his admission, and empathetic of his fear, and she didn't want to overwhelm him by crying. "That is very brave to say," she said, wiping the corner of her eye with her thumb, then giving him a slightly warmer smile. "I'm proud of you."

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	asterius 2023-01-18 11:28 am UTC (link)
	She was proud of him? For being weak? That was strange, but he liked the sound of the words. They warmed his chest again. "M-maybe I- Maybe I tell my friends where the place is. And if I still feel...scared...they can make sure the place gets taken down. My friend is Tuck. He is a good person." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

passionburning
2023-01-18 12:05 pm UTC (link)

"Oh- oh yes, I know him. He is very nice." Erato nodded, glad that Asterion was in Tuck's capable hands. "Do you need to go back yourself? Would it even be safe for you? How long would it be for? I don't want to see you get hurt." Her chest felt tight suddenly, as she realised that this job might take him away for a length of time, and then who would she have to bring her pretty rocks? Who would she have to make her feel safe when she was low and afraid? Apollo, yes, but his attention was divided, he had so many things and people on the go. Asterion was just hers, and she still needed his strong shoulder to lean on.

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	asterius 2023-01-18 12:09 pm UTC (link)
	No one could call Asterion an intuitive person, but he had spent enough time around Erato to know when something was wrong. So he leaned forward and reached out his hand to her again. "Erato," he said, in his very most gentle voice, "are you okay?" He wasn't sure what to do if she wasn't, but he still wanted to know. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

passionburning
2023-01-18 12:30 pm UTC (link)

Erato looked back at him. Was she okay? Sometimes. But if Asterion was too stubborn to stay out of that horrid place on his own, then she could get him to stay.

"No. I need you here. I- I would worry." She wasn't lying, she just might not have said it otherwise. She was so conscious of not inadvertently promising more than she could give, but right now, he was what she needed to stay sane.

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asterius
2023-01-18 12:34 pm UTC (link)

"You need me?" Asterion was fairly sure no one had ever needed him in his entire life. Tolerated him, sure. Some maybe even liked him these days, but needed- "Then I'll stay," he promised quickly. "I will tell my friends where to find it and I will stay with you." He went quiet for a moment, until he said, "I- I didn't know you needed me."

He wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel about that, but he knew he liked it.

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	passionburning 2023-01-19 09:32 am UTC (link)
	Carefully, Erato set her mug down on the coffee table. "You make me feel safe," she said softly, looking down at her hands. He had been awfully easy to convince, but then, perhaps he just needed the perfect excuse not to go back down into that particular emotional labyrinth. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	asterius 2023-01-19 09:36 am UTC (link)
	The fact that he made anyone feel safe was a miracle, let alone Erato whom he cared for so much. "You make me feel safe too," Asterion admitted. "I will stay with you. I- I would do anything for you." It was very true, of course. But it wasn't often Asterion was open and honest like this. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

passionburning
2023-01-19 10:09 am UTC (link)

Erato gave Asterion a sweet smile, drawing in a strengthening breath through her nose as she did. She didn't want to feel sad and scared, she wanted to be glad to see her dear friend and have a good evening with him. "Thank you," she said sincerely. "I don't know what I'd do if I didn't know where you were, and putting yourself in danger too. I wouldn't be able to sleep until I knew you were safe." She shuffled over on the sofa to sit closer to him, leaning in against his shoulder.

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	asterius 2023-01-19 10:14 am UTC (link)
	Asterion wrapped an arm around her so she could curl up at his side, warm and comfortable. It was a strange feeling, to have someone who cared so much about him. Asterion had been so lonely for so much of his life, that this was definitely the good kind of strange. "I feel strange again, but different. Like my chest is warm. What is that?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

passionburning
2023-01-19 10:34 am UTC (link)

She stroked her hand over his chest, her fingers gentle as they rested over his heart. "Love," she said simply, because of course it was, what else would it be? And she loved him too, but in a way that was different to what she was used to. This one wasn't a burning fire of infatuation that consumed itself, it was warm and steady and maybe built to last a long time.

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	asterius 2023-01-19 10:37 am UTC (link)
	Asterion blinked at her, and then his mouth fell open a little. "I- Is it?" he asked, a little taken aback. It made sense though. Of course he loved her. "Oh. Well, I- Oh." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	passionburning 2023-01-19 11:11 am UTC (link)
	Erato made a little noise of agreement, and drew a little heart on his chest with her fingertip. "Much nicer than being scared," she murmured, nestling in a little closer. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	asterius 2023-01-19 11:13 am UTC (link)
	That made Asterion chuckle, just a little, and he leaned down to kiss her hair. "It is. Erato? When I go to talk to my friend Tuck about this, will you come with me?" If he had her there, she could explain why he couldn't help with the fight. She would have better words that he did. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	passionburning 2023-01-19 11:30 am UTC (link)
	"You want me to?" She looked up at him, curious as to why. "You think he might argue with you? I thought he was nice." Tuck hadn't seemed the type to push people into things, but she didn't know what Asterion had been asked, or volunteered, to do. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	asterius 2023-01-19 11:32 am UTC (link)
	"No," Asterion shook his head, "I don't think he'd argue. He's a nice man. But just...to help me with the words? So they understand." He didn't think Tuck was the kind of person to be disappointed with him, but Erato explaining would help. "And I- I like having you with me." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	passionburning 2023-01-19 12:08 pm UTC (link)
	Erato felt a tremble of anxiety at going out of the house, which she didn't do a lot lately. Going somewhere outside where anybody could be walking made her stomach twist. But then- she'd be with Asterion. Nothing bad would happen. She would be alright. "Alright," she said. "I like being with you." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	asterius 2023-01-19 12:12 pm UTC (link)
	"Thank you," Asterion said, his voice full of gratitude. Now, with all of that nasty business out of the way, they could just relax. "You are very kind to me," he said, quietly. "I haven't known a lot of kindness in my life. Thank you, Erato." (Reply to this) (Parent)

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