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Erato ([info]passionburning) wrote in [info]nevermore_logs,
@ 2022-06-24 23:36:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood: numb
Entry tags:asterion, erato

WHO: Erato, Asterion
WHEN: late April
WHERE: Erato’s home
WHAT: A slow recovery, maybe a breakthrough
WARNINGS: Erato got tortured



In the time since leaving Apollo’s home, Erato had barely been outside. She sat in the window and stared out at the clouds, staying still for long stretches of time, just watching the shape, the colour, the texture of the sky. She cracked the window and felt the late Spring breeze bring her fresh scents from the flowers and trees it had passed, and she shivered and held onto the window sill, and just let things be.

She’d been told that Apollo had arranged for her to take an extended leave of absence from her job, but she hadn’t followed up further than that. She didn’t know who was paying her rent or how. Someone brought fresh groceries in, and she constantly grazed, plucking at grapes and nuts and crackers. Someone fed her cats, and the animals would curl against her and purr and she was so thankful they were alive and safe.

When Asterion had to go to work, one of her sisters would sit with her, because the thought of being left alone and unguarded sent her spiraling into a choking panic. She just couldn’t stomach the thought of isolation. The need to know someone was there was desperate and terrifying. Sweet, strong, loyal Asterion was the one who carried her to bed, who made sure she ate, who reminded her to bathe, while poor addled Erato murmured in verse and sat for hours unwilling to close her eyes in case she woke up without them. He didn’t try to make her talk, or force her to do anything she wasn’t ready for. He was just always there as a solid, comforting presence.

She sat in the bath as Asterion rinsed out her hair, watching the bubbles eddy on the surface of the water with their rainbow shimmer.

“The earth has bubbles, as the water has, And these are of them,” she murmured, swishing her fingers through and making them disappear. So fleeting- so easily lost, like beauty, like joy, like happiness. All gone.



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[info]passionburning
2022-06-26 11:36 am UTC (link)
She turned to look at him, twisting her wet hair over her shoulder, and gave a nod. Something to see? She never wanted to stop seeing, ever in her whole life. She would look at any and all things he had to offer her. Perching on the edge of her bed, she looked up at him expectantly.

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[info]asterius
2022-06-26 11:57 am UTC (link)
"Wait here," he said, giving her a gentle pat on the shoulder before he went over to his bag to rummage through it. Maybe he should have been carting around her things with more care, but he didn't have expensive things and he didn't know how to handle them. They were just in his backpack with his clothes.

He carried the bag back and he sat on the bed, pulling out the pieces of hers he had managed to locate. He had asked for help from Lewis Carroll, one purveyor of Antiques and Oddities. Charles, as Lewis Carroll asked to be called for some reason, had told Asterion that he knew all the best pawn shops in the area and he would keep a look out for the things Asterion had described-

"I found some of your things," he explained, handing them over. "I asked for help. Went looking myself. Bought them back for you."

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[info]passionburning
2022-06-27 11:25 am UTC (link)
There was a long, quiet pause as Erato turned the sparkly trinkets over in her hands, a curious frown creasing her brow. The gold and gems clinked together lightly. Some of these were glass costume jewellery, some were real diamonds and jewels, but all of them meant something to her. Carefully, she picked out a pretty cameo pendant, and suddenly it was like she was back in that back room in New Orleans, gasping with delight as the handsome sculptor she was taken with passed it to her.

Fat, wet tears began to roll down her cheeks. These things had been stolen from her, and it was like pieces of her soul were being returned. A beautiful heart-shaped brooch in greens and pinks, a gift from the second son of a wealthy merchant who she had helped to prove that his painting was worthwhile. A pin shaped like a crescent moon with opals that shimmered in the light, given to her by an Australian woman who had some to America disguised as a man to try her luck as a writer and musician. A beautiful art deco fairy taken from the body of her murdered lover, a beautiful Creole man, his creativity snuffed out by his landlord in a fit of jealous, drunken passion. All these things- all of this-

Erato gasped and sobbed, holding the beautiful things close, feeling like a dam was bursting inside her. So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this gives life to thee- life- Life! There was still beauty in this world, and she was still here to see it, her precious memories revived. "Oh- oh-" she blubbed through her tears, Asterion's kindness the most beautiful thing of all.

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[info]asterius
2022-06-27 11:28 am UTC (link)
Oh no she was crying. Asterion panicked and he moved off the bed pacing. "I'm sorry!" he said, not realising they were good tears. He didn't know what he'd done, but he was never going to do it again. "What did I do wrong? Tell me so I'll be more careful!"

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[info]passionburning
2022-06-27 11:44 am UTC (link)
She felt like she was choking on her words, but by Olympus she had to express herself and use her own words again, and not hide behind the genius of others.

"Thank you- thank you-" she sobbed, and looked up at Asterion with glistening eyes. "This is- so kind- you are so kind-"

Kindness was something she'd been sorely deprived of in her time locked away, and she'd been protecting herself from cruelty by refusing to speak for herself. Now she could she didn't need to do that anymore.

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[info]asterius
2022-06-27 11:46 am UTC (link)
Asterion stopped his pacing as Erato spoke to him, really spoke to him as herself. Relief flooded through him so viciously it made his knees go a little weak and he stumbled a little on his way back to kneel in front of her.

"Erato," he whispered, reaching out to lay his hands on her knees. "You're talking to me."

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[info]passionburning
2022-06-27 12:07 pm UTC (link)
"These aren't just- things," Erato said, not trying to wipe the tears away. She needed him to understand why this meant so much. "These are my- my lives. My loves. The people I've inspired. She took my memories from me and you've given them back." No, they weren't all returned, but now she held out a little hope that perhaps one day she'd find more, perhaps all of them. The tears she fell, but her sobs subsided and she smiled through them, like a sunburst behind a raincloud.

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[info]asterius
2022-06-27 12:11 pm UTC (link)
Oh he hadn't messed up at all. But he also definitely didn't have the words or emotional intelligence to properly react to what she had said either. He felt very warm in his chest and pleased with himself for making her so happy, but he had no idea how to express that.

"Oh," he said, nodding awkwardly. "Well, you're welcome," he said, still nodding. "This man, Charles, he wrote a book about a girl in a mirror. He is still looking for more. I couldn't remember everything to describe it but now you can."

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[info]passionburning
2022-06-27 12:18 pm UTC (link)
She nodded and looked down at her trinkets again. Yes, she could talk to someone about what she was missing. She would be able to describe every one of them. "Yes," she said. "I will never forget what you have done for me, never as long as I live. I am in debt to you. Whatever you wish for, I will do everything in my power to get for you." She said the words with deep feeling, and meant every one of them.

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[info]asterius
2022-06-27 12:22 pm UTC (link)
Asterion shook his head then, vehemently. He didn't want anything of hers, beyond friendship. "No," he said, as gently as he could, "all I want is to stay your friend. I didn't know people could like me for me. You showed me people could. That's all I want."

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