InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Elementary Watson, elementary!"

incorrigible (adj): maggie macdougal (wrecktify) wrote in neeps,
@ 2017-12-05 20:41:00

Entry tags:

! journal, florinda mcgonagall, maggie macdougal

Have you got a few galleons burning a hole in Gringott's because you were waiting—with bated breath—for the right investment to come along? Well, have I got an opportunity for you!

For the wee, insignificant price of all your savings, you can be a part of the hottest craze that's about to sweep Scotland: Owl Ale!

Owl Ale (trademark pending) fills a glaring lacuna in the professional Quidditch world by training owls to deliver beer—unspilt!—directly to eager and thirsty customers sitting in the bleachers. No more waiting in long, endless lines while Curly and Moe toss a quaffle back and forth — the customer will see all the inaction up close because they won't have to line up for their drink like a filthy peasant!

INVEST TODAY!
Oh, and if anyone's in search of their soulmate, a man named Norbert just left my flat via floo and assured me that, despite the missing ear and barely-audible voice, he's quite the catch.

FLORINDA MCGONAGALL

Why, hello.

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 04:55 am UTC (link)
	Yes. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 04:55 am UTC (link)
	OH! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 05:54 am UTC (link)
	So that's all you wanted to know? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 05:58 am UTC (link)
	I'm trying to live vicariously through you, give me a little slack. Did you enjoy yourself? I can provide an itemized list of questions instead, if you'd prefer. ~~I have th~~ (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 06:00 am UTC (link)
	You have an itemised list? No, seriously, we've been seeing each other for a while, not a big deal, and I was there for it because I usually go to those things because of Mungos, and also it is a good cause. So I went and he was there and we had some fun and left together. What are you asking about? His hair product regimen? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 06:06 am UTC (link)
	[...] I could produce one. You continued to have fun after you left? Good show, McGonagall! And I wasn't going to ask the invasive questions, but since you brought it up, I'd like to point out that you're contractually obligated to share his hair secrets with me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 06:09 am UTC (link)
	I didn't take notes, actually. But I can tell you it's extensive. His hair care regimen, I mean. The rest I leave to your imagination. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 06:11 am UTC (link)
	Not even a product name written on the back of a receipt? You need to get your priorities in order. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 06:13 am UTC (link)
	My priorities are in order. Sometimes a girl has better things to do in the shower than investigate what's on the ledge. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 06:16 am UTC (link)
	Florinda! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 06:19 am UTC (link)
	And he cooks a nice breakfast and that's all you need to know. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 06:21 am UTC (link)
	I feel positively edified. Well done! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 06:22 am UTC (link)
	Now we need to arrange something equally fun for you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 06:24 am UTC (link)
	But then I'll have been living vicariously for naught. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 06:26 am UTC (link)
	Then you'll have a chance to use all your vicarious lessons! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 06:32 am UTC (link)
	My skills lie in finding dance partners for mates, not for myself. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 08:20 pm UTC (link)
	Excuse you, I found this one all on my own! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 09:27 pm UTC (link)
	I wasn't taking credit, I promsie! I simply meant that I haven't got my eye on anyone in particular. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 09:44 pm UTC (link)
	Neither did I, and I got some. It could happen to you, too! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 09:58 pm UTC (link)
	"Got some." How trendy of you! [...] We'll see. You may have to send me names, photos, profiles, and bank statements, however; I have quite discerning tastes [...] as I'm sure we're all aware. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 10:14 pm UTC (link)
	I think we all know better than that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie wrecktify 2017-12-06 10:16 pm UTC (link)
	Fine: I've been known to think before I snog at least once in my life. Possibly twice! Better? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-06 10:28 pm UTC (link)
	Better. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Flaggie

wrecktify
2017-12-06 10:41 pm UTC (link)

I believe I deserve a little more credit than you're affording me, Florinda who slept with my boss. I spent three months with that bloke who worked a perfectly respectable job in the Department of International Magical Cooperation! [...] Before I broke it off [...] because he bored me to tears.

But in my defence, our final date was so ~~dull~~ awful that I considered casting a pepper breath hex on myself. It was a matter of self-preservation by that point and, as I'm sure we can all agree, the most mature course of action.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Flaggie lionhearts 2017-12-07 12:35 am UTC (link)
	The answer is don't start with boring blokes. There's a middle space between "I have a death wish" and "I have a wish to be bored to death". (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Flaggie -

wrecktify, 2017-12-07 12:42 am UTC

(Read comments) -