£∃G↑∅∏ ♟ (legionnaire_) wrote in monte_rpg, @ 2012-08-16 11:12:00 |
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Current mood: | crazy |
Entry tags: | [event], hel, legion, sedna |
well, fuq.
[As of yesterday, it's been incredibly hard for Legion to open his mouth and not have something...objectionable spill out. He's been refusing to talk, or write, or communicate, thinking that it might possibly all be in his head.
Which, if that were the case, and if it was just nonsense he was spewing, he'd be fine with. Because that would certainly be better than whatever this is. This force that makes him forego his usual routine of picking and choosing which truths come out, and which don't.
Truth, for Legion, is a multi-faced monster. Technically, there are no 'lies', because whatever he's saying is always true, just not to the entire population of his brain. He doesn't lie, so much as he omits the truths. Truths that stay buried, because they aren't appropriate for public ears, or truths that he's ashamed of, truths he doesn't want to face. Truths that could get him into trouble, and the fact is, he's been burying them all, and they're all bubbling to the top, re-emerging when he doesn't want them, and forcing him into awkward situations, and this, is probably about to be one of them.]
lol oh god i can't stop saying dumb shit today, and usually it's like 'well, i'm always saying dumb shit' except they've actually stopped calling me stupid in my head which is nice because i actually feel like i have room in here and that's cool i guess if you think about it.
i told a lady i hoped her dog died. that didn't actually make me feel bad. but i kind of said it way too loudly and i was trying to tell her that it was okay if she sat next to me with it or whatever, and i kind of- yes. that happened. i don't feel bad. i don't feel bad about a lot of things.
well, i feel bad now. kind of not really. but not about that? my head hurts. which is odd, because i'm trying to say something about how i'm TOTALLY NOT OKAY WITH ANY OF THIS AND WHY-
we should stop talking. forever. well, not forever. i have a h- i like my voice. Voice(s). and I'd like to still talk to Bethany.
i mean lol what.
[BETH : Voice ]
[Somewhat strained] This isn't cool- I feel like- You should. I don't feel like I can control anything anymore and you should st-
You should sta-[There's a rustling of fabric, and he muffles a few words.] Stay awa- damnit.
Stay. A- [He sighs, and there's an audible thud of his head on his desk. The next words come out soft, but still a bit forced.]
Stay with me. I would like you to stay with me. I want to tell you to stay away from me, but that's not what- I want. I really am sorry. If I say anything stupid.
I-[Legion panics, and cuts the feed.]
[JUDAS]
is that blood? we feel blood. shed for you, right? from you? tsk.
cleanse us of our sins. or relax and let us take your brain. you like our voice, too, don't you?