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Tweak says, "I have misplaced my pants."

Kitty Pryde (Shadowcat) (kitty_has_claws) wrote in marinanova,
@ 2017-01-23 17:54:00

Entry tags:

ianto jones, jack harkness, kitty pryde (aoa), pavel chekov (au), peter parker (stnas)

Day 412 The rewind
[Video/Action | OPEN]
So that...happened.

I've been here for awhile and for those of you who are on the newer side of things, I wish I had some keen insight for you, but that's just one of the games they play. It was kind of a remix of some of their old ones. [She's seen people remember more future before and seen people think they were connected to others in new ways. She had a husband for a day once before.] I think it's just important to remember who you are without their toying and lean on people when you need to. We're in this together.

I don't think what we saw was a real future even if parts of it seemed like they were. There were some conflicting outlooks. Of course, that hasn't stopped me from trying to remember exactly how we overthrew them in mine. [It hasn't stopped her from thinking about a lot of things it brought up.]

Anyway... [She hopes you're all okay. She would have been better at saying that yesterday when it was still twenty years from now. So, she just ends the feed there and you might find her out and about looking particularly thoughtful. Maybe absently walking through solid objects including you! As one does.]

[Action | Closed to Chekov]
[Before her broadcast or any other calls there is just a girl waking up next to a boy. Everything feels right at first. She snuggles closer and the details don't feel important. Are they still in the future? Was yesterday a dream or an experiment? It doesn't matter yet. She's only half awake and warm and comfortable.]

[Video | Closed to Jack]
Hey, so, how are things? [Concerned but also unsure how to ask if yesterday ruined his relationships for real.]

[Video | Closed to Ianto]
Need a coffee? [Code for "let's talk."]

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kitty_has_claws
2017-02-03 06:02 pm UTC (link)

[She laughs at that.] I didn't even consider the possibility of all at once. I'm slacking.

But yeah, I got the feeling there were a few people I'd reach out to for...extra. But I only remember you and then also Gaeta. And you and Chekov were the only ones I was with yesterday.

[Softer.] It was our first time. [She assumes he'll know she means Chekov since it wasn't her first time with Jack.]

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	foreverjack 2017-02-03 09:46 pm UTC (link)
	[He grins, slightly, relieved by the fact there's even something to smile about! And then whistles softly through his teeth at her revelation.] Wow. That's kinda mean. They made you miss out on your first time because you didn't know it was your first time? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-03 10:40 pm UTC (link)
	It was the first time I told him I loved him too. I think that part was worse. [It's all bad. And, yes, just her first time saying it.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	foreverjack 2017-02-04 09:06 am UTC (link)
	Ouch. Yeah, that's... complicated. [A wry twist of his lips.] Perhaps not quite as complicated as my complicated, but yeah. [He glances across at her, sympathetic.] How was the follow-up on that this morning? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kitty_has_claws
2017-02-04 03:51 pm UTC (link)

It's not a contest, Jack. [Giving him a playful nudge.]

It was...okay? He, um, he told me he still loves me. He actually said it the first time before this all happened and I told him he was important to me. And this morning I almost said it back. I felt it. I still feel it. But I don't know how much of it is me and how much of it is memories from yesterday and I'm afraid in a week those will have faded and I won't be sure how I feel again.

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foreverjack
2017-02-05 09:12 am UTC (link)

I know. [Another almost-smile, which turns compassionate again as she continues. It's quite probable that he of al the people here understands how hard it can be to say 'I love you'.

He reaches out to cover her hand with his own.] If there's anything I've learned about Chekov over the past twenty years, it's that he's patient. Wait. Take your time. I'm pretty sure he'll still be there when you're ready to say it.

[So much easier to give advice about other people's relationships!]

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	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-05 03:41 pm UTC (link)
	[She smiles softly back at him.] When did you get so wise? [She reaches for the orange juice, skipping the vodka as she pour some into a cup for herself.] He's been telling me that. He's so understanding. It's part of why I want to say things that will make him happy, but I'm more afraid of hurting him later with those things. So waiting is good. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	foreverjack 2017-02-05 04:02 pm UTC (link)
	[A self-deprecating smile that's half-grimace, this time.] Apparently it's easier when it's someone else's relationship. More distance, I guess. Just be grateful for him being so understanding, eh? That he seems to get how you work. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-05 04:10 pm UTC (link)
	He does. I think most of the time he's known me—maybe all of it?—he's been watching Reid and I breaking up or trying again. Can't really say he didn't know what he was getting into. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	foreverjack 2017-02-05 04:23 pm UTC (link)
	[He nods slowly.] That's a good point. I guess even you knew what you were getting into too, in a way. The way you work, in a relationship, I mean. [Slowly, feeling his way] Perhaps it had just been so long for me, before Ianto, I'd forgotten what it was like. How crap I was at it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-05 04:32 pm UTC (link)
	Intense. [That's her in a relationship as different as the relationships have been.] Do you really think you were? You were married a few times. They didn't go well? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	foreverjack 2017-02-05 09:03 pm UTC (link)
	[He gives her a dry look.] My last - well, not even marriage, actually, but we had a daughter together - anyway, she left me and put our daughter into witness protection because my life was too dangerous and she couldn't deal with me never telling her anything. I really don't have a good track record in this area. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-05 11:05 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, Jack. [Heartbreaking. She leans in to hug him again.] For what it's worth, I feel like your friendship has been good for me. [Even if it came with some complications that are definitely not all on him.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

foreverjack
2017-02-05 11:28 pm UTC (link)

[Oh, it gets worse than that.] She did the right thing, though. Later, when she was grown up, I got to know Alice again. And then I ended up killing her son to save the world. My life was too dangerous. You can see why I stopped trying to get too close to people.

[He leans into the hug, though, grateful for the comfort of contact, and the words that accompany it.] Thanks, though. At least you're one person I haven't completely failed yet.

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	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-05 11:43 pm UTC (link)
	[You killed your grandson? Damn.] You haven't failed Ianto. You're going to work this out. And at least here we all have a pretty equal amount of danger in our lives? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	foreverjack 2017-02-06 08:09 am UTC (link)
	[Yep. Damn is about right. He holds on tight, snorting softly.] Of course, yesterday it was kind of the opposite problem with danger. Not enough - not enough excitement - and that was what sent me off trying to find it in other people, or in bars, because there was nothing else to look forward to. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-08 02:12 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah... [She was happy and content and yet needed that thrill of something else.] I can't imagine I would have had an arrangement like Chekov and I had without being more than just stir crazy. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

foreverjack
2017-02-09 05:57 pm UTC (link)

Exactly. [He reaches to refill his cup, and glances up at her with a dry twist of his lips.]

At least you understand that. I can't help wondering if the AIs knew what they were doing that day they paired me off with you and Ianto off with Spike. [A beat, and then he gestures vaguely with the cup.] No offence to Chekov or anything. I just mean, you seem to understand me so much better than Ianto does.

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	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-09 06:04 pm UTC (link)
	Well, strong emotions can confuse things. I used to think I understood Reid really well. At this point he's probably the biggest mystery to me in the dome. Or at least it feels like it. I wouldn't give the narratives they write for us too much credit. But they probably do know they'll mess with our heads. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

foreverjack
2017-02-09 06:12 pm UTC (link)

Oh, they mess with our heads all right. [Grimly, before taking a long sip of vodka, blinking slowly at the heat as it goes down. It helps, a little.] It's like, they give - and then they take away. As if things weren't complicated enough without their little games.

And then they have the audacity to say the bands and rules are all for our own good, to stop things getting too complicated!

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	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-09 07:21 pm UTC (link)
	[She and Jack really are on the same page a lot of the time. At the risk of thinking of Reid again this does remind her a lot of the things she was saying the day they broke up for the third or fourth but also last time.] The part where it's for our own good really is just salt in the wound. It was nice believing for a day that all the games were over. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	foreverjack 2017-02-09 09:14 pm UTC (link)
	It was, wasn't it? [He stares out into space for a moment, finally dwelling on something about yesterday that wasn't Ianto-related. (Except it was, because everything revolved around Ianto.)] But then, even then, they still won. Trapped here forever - it'd be just like another one of their little games, just played long-term instead of only for a day. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kitty_has_claws
2017-02-09 09:34 pm UTC (link)

I think it was easier for me. I mean, I didn't like seeing everyone else going through it and I definitely could have used more space, more stimulation, more something. But I didn't have anywhere else to go. No one to get back to. This is all just second chance time here. And even if I had been able to go home with someone I would have been even more different than I ever have before. The only mutant. One of only two people who have been kidnapped to a multidimensional prison. The only person from my world. I probably would have had to hide those things too. It might have been the happiest possible ending for me at this point. [Which is kind of sad even though it was a good day for her. It was hurting so many of the people around her.]

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foreverjack
2017-02-10 10:07 pm UTC (link)

[Oh Kitty. Break his heart, why don't you? He doesn't have anyone to go back to either, but even though he's just as unique as she is, he's never seen that as a barrier to feeling a part of a community. Perhaps because he's had longer to get used to the idea of being the only one who's seen what he's seen, of being alone in that.]

I didn't know you felt like that. [Slowly, softly, because it's all he can think of to say.]

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	kitty_has_claws 2017-02-10 10:51 pm UTC (link)
	[She looks at that expression on his face and hears that tone of voice.] I have a feeling my speech about how lucky I am didn't sound the most uplifting. [Probably because it's not. It is a collection of tragedy that make her uniquely suited for an otherwise very depressing style of living.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)