InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "YOU`LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!!!"

Kitty Pryde (Shadowcat) (kitty_has_claws) wrote in marinanova,
@ 2015-01-05 07:35:00

Entry tags:

carol peletier, damon salvatore, kitty pryde (aoa), korra, nathan harris, spencer reid, spike, tyki mikk

Day 305 : Action : Mistletoe OPEN!
[Kitty is up and out early. Working out in the training center and after a shower making some rounds through the prison. It may not be strictly part of her Defense Force schedule, but it helps clear the head and keep her active which is nice after the whole spilling every little thought thing that happened just a couple of days ago.

Of course there are some new obstacles out in the prison today to keep things interesting.]

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thisiscalm
2015-02-04 09:39 am UTC (link)

[ He knows them and he hopes that she knows that he feels that way too. It's just so messed up. Too messy still to dive back into it, as much as he wants to right now. ]

I'm sorry. [ A soft whimper, possibly carrying more emotion and honesty than those words have in a while. It's hard to retain the meaning when he says them so often, but it feels necessary in the moment. ]

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kitty_has_claws
2015-02-04 03:44 pm UTC (link)

[She does. There are lonely, damaged, low moments when she questions and doubts and fears, but she can't do that when they are close like this. She knows better even when she doesn't feel better.]

I know. [She does know this isn't how he wanted their relationship to go. And that he'd never want to hurt her even if lashing out is one of his coping mechanisms. She has a few bad ones of her own.]

I am too. [She isn't mimicking him just to be safe here. She means it. She wishes she was more solid for him while he's needed her. She regrets some of the things she's said and done even if they came from an honest place at the time. She's also sorry for the things she can't take the blame on. That he was sent back and fell in love with someone only to watch her die, unable to save her. She knows what that's like. Maybe not romantically though Piotr came close to dying once and it changed him and their relationship forever. No two tragedies are ever identical, but she has the bits and pieces to know how she'd feel even if she can't know exactly how he feels.

Her hand rubs over his back.]

Today's been hard.

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thisiscalm
2015-02-06 12:09 pm UTC (link)

[ This is very much what he always needed and never really felt like he could reach for. It wasn't her fault and that in turn made him not want to unload too heavily on her. How could he? It was all about another girl. You don't unload that on your girlfriend even if she happens to also be your best friend. ]

Yeah... really hard. [ He tightens the embrace in a careful squeeze. Doesn't want to go. Not sure how he can stay. ]

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	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-06 03:53 pm UTC (link)
	[That's definitely not recommended, but at the same time their lives are pretty far from normal and sometimes you have to do the unrecommended thing because no one ever predicted anything like this.] Hard month. [Softly.] I love you, Reid. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisiscalm 2015-02-07 02:41 pm UTC (link)
	[ Again, words he needs to hear yet can't stand. Is he ever going to be able to stitch himself together into one person? ] I love you too, Kitty. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kitty_has_claws
2015-02-07 05:16 pm UTC (link)

[She hugs him tighter or tries to. Their embrace is already very secure. It's good hearing those words and for a time she says nothing, just listening to their echo in her mind.]

This... [She doesn't want to say these words, but she's worried about not saying them too.] This doesn't change anything, does it? [She tries to just say it gently like she understands, but there is a ring of a question in her voice and of hope.]

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thisiscalm
2015-02-07 10:42 pm UTC (link)

[ He should say no. No, of course it doesn't change anything. Why would it? This isn't a fairytale, a kiss can't make everything right again. But... can he? Can he really say no without lying? It doesn't have to be back to normal for it to have changed something. ]

...I don't know. [ Quietly and carefully, like he's worried it'll break apart of he's too sure of himself. ]

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	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-07 10:50 pm UTC (link)
	[She dare to pull back a little, but she doesn't want too much space. She needs his arms around her and vice versa. She just wants to look into his eyes too.] ...Yeah? [How can "I don't know" feel like such a spring of hope? She shouldn't get ahead of herself or ahead of him anyway. Going too fast was the problem before, wasn't it?] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisiscalm 2015-02-09 09:41 am UTC (link)
	[ It could be a spring of hope. It could also be the start of disaster. He swallows sharply, unable to see where this narrow path is headed. ] Yeah. [ He swallows again. ] I miss you. I... I want all that back. Everything we had. I just... I don't want to rush in and ruin it for good. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-09 01:27 pm UTC (link)
	I don't think being together is going to ruin us. [But she can feel the nerves in her stomach building as they talk about this.] But... I want you to feel good about it. [So that he doesn't leave again. Because it isn't the together that scares her. It's the apart.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisiscalm 2015-02-11 05:28 pm UTC (link)
	[ He draws a shuddering breath. Nods. It's... hard, but they can't keep doing this. They can't stay here in limbo. ] Could we... maybe just — I don't know. Date? For a while? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kitty_has_claws
2015-02-11 08:01 pm UTC (link)

[Reid, sometimes you are the cutest guy ever. And while there are some flaws she can see in this plan there's really no answer she can give but yes. Of course she wants that. She wants anything that is trying and doing and not waiting and wondering. She smiles softly at him.]

As long as you don't fault me for being the clingy chick who is already in love with you on the first date.

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	thisiscalm 2015-02-13 05:57 pm UTC (link)
	[ It's something, which is all that matters right now. It's taking a step forward in a way that's easy to control — he can retreat without retreating, take time to breathe and space to put himself together when he needs it. They can't do that if they live together. ] I think I can let it pass. [ A careful little smile. ] It's not like I'm any better. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-14 03:15 am UTC (link)
	[Is it weird that everything is going right this moment and she still kind of wants to cry? That can happen with the good feelings too? Such new life experiences. Still, she bites it back.] You're paying, right? Do I get a corsage? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisiscalm 2015-02-14 10:59 am UTC (link)
	[ Emotions are weird, what can you say? ] I didn't know I was taking you to prom. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-14 07:34 pm UTC (link)
	Okay, so I'm kind of new to this dating thing. [No, really, she kind of is. She did more of a falling for the guys she was spending time with thing. They weren't really dates. Not in name anyway.] What do you have against corsages anyway? [Also, still touching him. Still holding him. Conversations are just better this way.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisiscalm 2015-02-16 05:45 pm UTC (link)
	Me too. [ Considering that, before her, he never dated. Maeve never changed that either, though they gave it one valiant attempt before fear and paranoia cut the date short before it even really got a chance to start. Thoughts he's not lingering on right now. ] And I have nothing against corsages. You can have one, if you really want. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-16 06:47 pm UTC (link)
	I mostly just want more time with you. [And less awkwardness.] So, uh, this date...when do you want to...? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisiscalm 2015-02-18 12:55 pm UTC (link)
	Soon? Maybe, uh... maybe not today, but soon. [ Before he loses his nerve. ] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-20 02:40 am UTC (link)
	I like soon. [She also likes details, but doesn't know if she should push. Things have been so fragile.] Soon and a corsage. It's almost a plan. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisiscalm 2015-02-21 09:45 am UTC (link)
	Almost, huh? [ Almost is good. Almost is secretly a definitely, he's not going to let himself chicken out on this, but almost feels easier on his heart. Less pressure. ] I, uh... I was going somewhere. I think. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-21 05:08 pm UTC (link)
	Right. Important places to be. [She manages a soft smile. She'd like something more pinned down, but baby steps, right?] Good luck with the rest of today, you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisiscalm 2015-02-22 05:14 pm UTC (link)
	You too... though I have a feeling you need it less. [ He makes a reluctant start, a little at first and then all at once. ] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2015-02-22 07:06 pm UTC (link)
	[She felt like she needed it a lot before, but now? Now she feels pretty...solidly okay which is better than it's been in a long time.] (Reply to this) (Parent)

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