InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "You're my only hope!"

helen magnus, m.d. d.t.c.x.b. (lifelines) wrote in marinanova,
@ 2014-04-07 10:56:00

Entry tags:

aidan reilly, data, elena gilbert, euphemia li britannia, helen magnus, piper halliwell, rose

Day 266 | open action; + open video;
[ action ]

It's been a full week since Helen realized Jean-Luc was gone, a full seven days since Ashley's birthday. At times, it's felt as though much more time has passed; at others, it feels like only yesterday and her heart breaks all over again. She's been keeping to herself more than usual. Even after she returned to work at the clinic and with the language classes, she was still having a difficult time wrapping her head around everything.

And then someone had mentioned the Memorial Gardens. It had seemed like such a simple thing, but now Helen isn't so certain it's as simple as she thought. Perhaps this is what she's needed.

Most of Day 266 can find her choosing flowers, specifically certain colored roses. These aren't to plant, more for show. For her. The flowers she chooses to plant in the garden are simple, tulips, daffodils, easy things that are very pretty and possibly easy enough to care for should she choose to return every so often. With three bulbs in hand and several roses, she takes to the earth. Once each of the bulbs is set into its spot, she places the roses over the spots where she has just planted new life. Three white roses for each of her special people, three yellow, one orange for Ashley, one pink for James, and one red for Jean-Luc. One of each color remains in her possession, as a reminder to herself of the people she's loved and lost.

After a few minutes of simply sitting there, one of those scattered showers does appear. It isn't much rain, but it's enough that she takes advantage of it. Holding the roses in her hands, she brings them to her nose to smell, allowing the sound of the rain falling to mask her tears as she finally truly weeps for three people: Ashley, her daughter, who was taken from her much too soon; James, her best friend and former lover, who had always challenged her to be the best she could be; and Jean-Luc, her lost love, whom she misses now more than she'd ever thought she could again.

[ video ]

[ later, once she's back at her apartment and a little more dry, she decides to address the network. she might not be dripping wet anymore, but she still bears the signs of having just been playing in the rain. what's noticeable this time is that the old glint of determination and confidence is back in her eyes and her voice is strong. you guys all missed the old helen. ]

I seem to have run across one of those scattered showers we were projected to have. This seems as good a time as any to remind everyone that the clinic is here for your use. I have also recently begun an Earth language studies course in conjunction with the Academy here. If anyone is interested, I am most certainly willing to offer what I know. In fact, today is one of the days I will be teaching, so please stop by the classroom if you're interested.

[ ooc: she can be encountered in action at any point in her endeavor, even while she's sitting in the rain or for the language class, or with responses to her network address. ]

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lifelines
2014-04-23 04:22 pm UTC (link)

[ helen places her hand over rose's and she gives it a squeeze, as much of gratitude as of reassurance. ]

I think, in this instance, we both needed a little time. Perhaps now we can make up for lost opportunities.

[ aka let's not dwell on the past and instead focus on the present. ]

I'm simply glad you're still here. [ especially since so many of her friends seem to have gotten pulled away from her so recently. ]

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justexisting
2014-04-27 08:20 pm UTC (link)

[ she gives her a grateful smile, touched by the gesture. helen's kindness went a long way for rose. ]

Yes. Absolutely. I would love to make up for them in whatever way I can.

[ rose won't argue. not even a little bad. ]

You don't know how glad I am to have you around. Really. [ rose takes a sip from her tea to disguise any emotions, not wanting to burst into tears on helen. ]

You're incredible.

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lifelines
2014-04-28 02:57 am UTC (link)

[ for her long lifespan, helen can appreciate a good friend. she's a social woman by nature, much as she tries to pretend she isn't, and every close friendship means something. this is why she holds on so dearly when she finds someone who understands, who stands a chance of living even half as long as she will. rose's friendship means as much to her as rebekah's did and she wants to hold this one for as long as she can.

she takes a sip of her own tea as she debates how to phrase her next words. ]

I've had five lifetimes to grow, to understand the world and the people and beings that inhabit it. I thought I understood so much, but since coming here, I've learned that I understand very little other than how to protect and how to be alone. [ she was lonely and bitter when she met jean-luc and rebekah. they changed her. and now rose is helping that change stick. ]

Now, I've come to realize that... perhaps the good and the bad events are intertwined. Perhaps we can't have one without the other and wishing the negative emotions wouldn't happen undermines the power and strength of the good that happens. [ thank you, data. she owes him for that bit of insight. ] I think I've needed to hear that for a good hundred years or so.

[ she isn't trying to undermine rose's compliment. right now, she's trying to put words to the mess of emotions she still feels over the loss of jean-luc and james so close to ashley's birthday. what she means to say is: ] Close friends are difficult to come by and I've been remiss in letting mine know how much I appreciate them.

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justexisting
2014-05-04 05:16 pm UTC (link)

I think you're right about that. Gives me a little bit of hope that even when things are really bad, the good will come to make everything okay again. [ helen put it a lot more eloquently than rose did but she understood the message that her friend was conveying to her. ]

There's nothing for me back home. I lost everything when my friend died; he was more like family really. [ she takes a moment, collects herself before continuing. ] But I came here and I meet people like you, and it helps. You've been an amazing friend to me, Helen. I don't say that enough.

[ they've both experienced pain and heartache countless times. helen had been hit recently, rose could see that. she wouldn't blame her for being distracted.]

I know how much you do care about others. I've witnessed it first hand. Sometimes, you just have to take some time for yourself to think things over before wanting to talk about it with someone else.

Whatever you need from me, whenever you need it, I'll do what I can.

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lifelines
2014-05-06 08:29 pm UTC (link)

[ data's words made an impact on her and she's trying to give it to someone else who could benefit. for a moment, she glances to her friend as rose speaks. helen understands feeling lost like that. she'd felt lost like that here recently, as though there was nothing for her, but she'd never quite felt it as strongly as when she lost ashley. this had come close and she's sorry to hear that rose feels she has nothing to return to. all she can do now is be a friend to her, be the support they both need. ]

I hope the same of you. Even if it's just to come over for a cup of tea and a little companionable silence. I'm not here to pass judgment -- God knows I have no room to. As long as I'm here, you will always have a friend.

It was a lesson I should have learned after I lost Ashley, but it took another hundred years and being kidnapped to the bottom of an ocean for it to sink in.

[ yes she did just make that pun. intentionally. ]

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justexisting
2014-05-10 09:58 pm UTC (link)

[ a soft smile forms on her lips. rose doesn't feel as sad now. ]

I have come to realise that tea and company can work wonders, even in a small way. [ she pauses for a moment. ] I'm the last person who can judge anyone either.

[ not after everything that rose had done in her life or done to other people. but she was trying her best to make up for it. ]

Not the most ideal way to come to a realisation but at least you did in the end, Helen. I don't know if that helps or not.

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lifelines
2014-05-11 03:53 am UTC (link)

[ good. That means she's doing her job as a friend. ]

I think that it does. Despite everything, we still have the capacity to learn.

[ to learn and to love. there's not much else she can say on the subject, but to make her point, she reaches over to give rose's hand a squeeze. As long as they have each other's friendship, helen has a feeling they'll be all right. ]

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	justexisting 2014-05-12 03:43 pm UTC (link)
	[ she squeezes helen's hand in return and smiles again, feeling even better than before. finding a friend in helen had been one of the best things in the prison and rose didn't want to lose it. ] No matter how long you and I have been around. [ rose laughs a little, taking a sip from her tea afterwards. ] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lifelines 2014-05-14 10:02 pm UTC (link)
	Amen. [ helen answers it with a smile boardering on bright. Rose's friendship has always been important to her, but especially now. They don't have many people now, but havint each other still is a bit of a blessing. Helen will take it for as long as she can. ] (Reply to this) (Parent)

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