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Siri Tachi (neverlosefocus) wrote in makebelievelog,
@ 2013-08-09 13:18:00

Entry tags:

obi-wan kenobi, siri tachi

Who: Siri Tachi and Obi-Wan Kenobi
What: Obi-Wan said she could wake him. Well, she’s taking him up on his offer
When: Late Friday the 9th/early Saturday the 10th
Where: Starting out in Siri’s room, ending up in Obi-Wan’s.
Rating/Warnings: Low, probably. Maybe PG. Restless Jedi?
Status: incomplete/in-progress

She hurt. Oh Force, how she hurt. And Obi-Wan knew it; Siri could see it on his face. “I’ll get the bacta...”

“Don’t leave me,” she told him, her hand dropping onto his. “I wanted to say - ”

“Siri, I must get the med kit - ”

“For star’s sake, Obi-Wan, I’m dying. Do you have to interrupt me now?” There was something like humour in her voice, but it was a pale and reedy thing. She was dying. And he would have to watch her go.

“You’re not dying.”

Something occurred to her then, the sentimental idea of a dying woman, and she struggled to get into a pouch on her utility belt. Her fingers plucked useless at it, and fear, for the first time, stabbed through her. “I can’t... Get it for me.”

It took him a moment to realise what she was talking about, but he slipped her warming crystal, the one that Talesan had returned to her, and pressed it into her hand. A faint smile appeared briefly on her face.

“No... yours.” She turned her hand, letting the crystal fall into his palm. It carried memories of things they hadn’t spoken about in years, but it was the only thing she had. “Now I will never leave you.”

“You will never leave me,” he echoed.

It took all she had, but Siri reached up, brushing fingertips gently against Obi-Wan’s cheek, before her hand fell. “Don’t worry so much,” she told him softly. She knew him better, knew he would anyway, but she had to try. She had so little time. I don’t want to leave you. She could admit that here, now, at the end. So much wasted time. Her eyes fluttered closed...

Siri shot awake with a sharp intake of air, hand pressed tightly against the scar on her chest. Her heart was hammering, and for one far-too-long moment the remembered pain of her injury took the air from her lungs. Then the memory receded a little, and she was left pale and shaking in her bed.

“Sithspit.” She hated those dreams. Her first thought was to put on her swimsuit, go to the lake and swim until she was too exhausted to think. Her second thought was the man asleep in the room next to hers. There wasn’t a particularly conscious decision on her part. She was moving before she’d even made it. Climbing out of bed, Siri grabbed her robe, slipping it on over the clothes that were serving as sleepwear. Then she moved towards the door. Obi-Wan had told her that she could wake him. And she was going to take him up on it.

It didn’t take her very long to slip down the hall to the neighbouring room. She knocked lightly, pulling her robe more tightly around her as she waited for him to answer. She was always cold after dreaming about her own death.

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neverlosefocus
2013-08-11 09:53 pm UTC (link)

“You can’t blame him for being... unsure, can you?” Siri asked quietly. “He knows the way Jedi are raised as much as we do. Their views on attachment. And his childhood was... drastically different from ours.” She wasn’t entirely sure how he would take her next suggestion. “You may need to be more... demonstrative, with him.”

That he admitted affection aloud at all took her by surprise. It was... unexpected. She said nothing, though. She wasn’t sure why the confession made her heart flutter a little, but she ignored it. “Yes, please,” she told him, taking the cup from his hands.

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master_kenobi
2013-08-11 10:15 pm UTC (link)

"Demonstrative?" He took the sugar from the cupboard and handed it to her. "Siri, I told him flat out that I have... an emotional attachment to him. It meant nothing to him." And it was a confession that wouldn't have been without ramifications in their world. If Master Yoda had heard him say such a thing so carelessly...

"I don't know how you can be more demonstrative than blunt confession."

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neverlosefocus
2013-08-11 10:27 pm UTC (link)

Oh, Obi-Wan. She busied herself with the sugar and her tea, using that as her reason for looking away from him. “There’s more to it than words. He... might not have believed you. Because of his childhood, the Jedi’s... views on attachment.” Views that they were... painfully familiar with. “You need to show him. Be physically demonstrative.”

This was a conversation she hadn’t expected to have, and while she appreciated that it served as a distraction from her nightmares it was still strange. She turned her attention to the cup in her hands, breathing in the steam and familiar scent of tea.

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	master_kenobi 2013-08-11 11:32 pm UTC (link)
	Obi-Wan tensed. After a moment, he looked at her. "Siri, I'm supposed to teach him to be a Jedi. Our connection is important for his training, but cultivating his dependence on traditional affection and attachment would be irresponsible. There has to be a middle ground." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neverlosefocus 2013-08-12 12:01 am UTC (link)
	She nodded. “Of course.” Ani was his Padawan. It wasn’t her place to interfere. And she was a bit of an oddity among the Jedi anymore, with her habit of making physical contact so easily. She shouldn’t have said anything. It just... made sense. Curling her hands around the cup of tea, she took a sip. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	master_kenobi 2013-08-12 12:15 am UTC (link)
	There was a silence as he waited for her elaborate, then he realized she wasn't going to. "And your thoughts on how that might be achieved...?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neverlosefocus 2013-08-12 12:21 am UTC (link)
	Siri looked at him over the rim of her tea cup. “I don’t know, Obi-Wan. I would start by talking with Anakin the older. He’ll have... unique insights, seeing as how he was the younger one once.” (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	master_kenobi 2013-08-12 12:35 am UTC (link)
	"I'll ask him, but... the younger version, his experiences are so different from what the grown Anakin had experienced at that age. They're already different people." He took a sip of his own tea. "I don't remember things being so difficult between us." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

neverlosefocus
2013-08-12 01:13 am UTC (link)

“He would still know how he thought, wouldn’t he?” Siri asked, her gaze pensive. “No matter the differences this place has helped to create, the older should still know something of how he thought as a child. That could be helpful.”

She reached out, brushing her fingertips lightly against his arm before returning her hand to her cup. “It won’t last.”

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	master_kenobi 2013-08-12 09:25 am UTC (link)
	"It might," Obi-Wan replied. "He's very stubborn. If he's trying to make a point, it might last even longer than that." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neverlosefocus 2013-08-12 06:47 pm UTC (link)
	“You’ll find a way to communicate and get past it,” was her easy response. Siri had the utmost confidence in Obi-Wan’s abilities as a Master. He was far better at it than she had been. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	master_kenobi 2013-08-12 07:29 pm UTC (link)
	"What if he hates me now? I'm not helping him if I'm breeding Dark Side emotions in him." He sighed. "I don't think you came here to talk about me, did you?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neverlosefocus 2013-08-13 02:32 am UTC (link)
	“He doesn’t hate you, Obi-Wan.” That was an absolutely unfounded worry. It wasn’t hatred. She was sure of that. “It’s not something I mind,” she told him. Attempting to help him figure out a way to connect with Ani was a far more useful endeavour than talking about sleeplessness. And nightmares. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	master_kenobi 2013-08-13 07:25 am UTC (link)
	"He only has to resent me a little. That can grow into... a larger rift." He paused. "Do you think he forgets? I mean, he's been here for a while now. Away from the Temple. Do you think he's become accustomed to how these people express themselves that he needs it now? Because I can't do it, Siri." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

neverlosefocus
2013-08-20 12:25 am UTC (link)

“I think you confused him. And I think that yes, he’s been here a long time. But he wants to be a Jedi. I also think you’ll find a way to communicate. It’ll just take time.” She took a sip of tea. His words weren’t a surprise. It was simply how he was. He hadn’t had the missions she had, the ones that had led to her picking up the tendency of physical contact.

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	master_kenobi 2013-08-20 10:39 am UTC (link)
	"Confused him." He was mulling the idea over. "Confused him how?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neverlosefocus 2013-08-31 06:45 am UTC (link)
	“Confused him about attachments, Obi-Wan.” Her voice was gentle. “He’s a child. You may have to talk to him in more detail about things.” A fond smile appeared on her face. “They tend to miss nuance.” (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	master_kenobi 2013-08-31 09:11 am UTC (link)
	"Ah. Anakin said something similar. It's just... I'm not sure... I'm not sure I quite know how," he confessed. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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