InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Mother, Father, Gentleman!"

Helena Wells-Quinzel is H.G. Wells (indelibleink) wrote in makebelievelog,
@ 2012-10-29 00:28:00

Entry tags:

anakin skywalker, h.g. wells

Who: Anakin and Helena
What: Two souls prone to the Dark Side share their accounts of To Destroy A World: Notes and Sundry Observations while Helena plays in a chemistry lab. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE?!
When: Monday evening sometime, after students and professors have left (slightly forward-dated because I got inspired)
Where: Chemistry lab at the university
Warnings: ~~WORLD ANNIHILATION!~~ Helena will have some bad luck as per the Halloween plot, complete with cursing, and considering these two might actually be bonding over unsavory topics like murder and so forth, possibly moderate to moderately high?

While the arrival of her younger self had thrown her off, Helena was still bound and determined to continue with her life as much as she could. Even having planted a tracker on her younger wasn't enough to erase worry from Helena's mind. So having made sure someone was watching the young girl while she was off at the university, Helena made her way there after ensuring she had the sample she'd taken from the shield James needed to be repaired. She was completely intent on completing this task, wanting to allow James to at least have that much of his father with him. Even though James was a teenager, Helena still felt an affinity towards him. She always had a way with younger people, and the fact he had kind words for her the first time they met only endeared her more to him. So she wanted to help him however she could.

On the way to the university, she'd crossed paths with a black cat. She didn't pay it much heed, mostly trying to ignore it given the fact she had her own cat at the castle, thanks to Claudia. She'd made it to the university during a slightly less rainy period than earlier in the day. However, that did not save her from the fact a car drove by, crashing through a rather large puddle that splashed her. Letting out a yelp of surprise, Helena looked down at herself.

"Bloody brilliant," she muttered and swiped at her clothes. At least she had a dark colored shirt on and dark denim jeans so the water and mud spatter didn't show up as much as it otherwise would. Sighing, she entered the appropriate building and went to meet Anakin. The instant she entered the building, she glanced around, wondering what it would be like to be a student. She had been considering looking into classes. She'd positively love taking the science courses, and it might be easier than her simply pouring over books on the subjects. After being momentarily distracted by some displays, she made her way towards the lab area. Spotting Anakin, she gave him a smile, brushing a hand through her hair as she approached him.

"Hello, Anakin," she greeted. She was more than excited to get into the lab. It had been far too long since she'd played in one. Yes she'd worked in one when she'd made the antidote that saved Claudia's life, but that was the last time she'd been in one. Thus it had been far too long since she'd been able to stretch her mind in such regards.

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darkforcerising
2012-10-31 09:41 am UTC (link)

Should Anakin explain there were children in that tribe he’d killed that night, too? That tribe had been terrorizing the farmers in the area for months, their attacks had increase and they were planning more, they had killed thirty farmers who had tried to get Shmi back. The night Anakin had found the tribe he’d also come across four slaughtered travelers, killed by the same tribe that had his mother. He knew every detail of what they’d done to his mother, the Force being the ever gracious power that it was, had granted him a front row seat to watch each lash fall across her back, every blow to her face, every time he slept. That tribe had done despicable things, but were those children so complicit in their parents’ sins?

He kept that detail to himself, given Helena’s confession revolved around killing the men who had killed her own daughter.

He nodded, “Those men deserved much more for what they did to your daughter.” He couldn’t say less than that, he too knew what it was to fight that inner dragon of hate and anger that fueled the drive for vengeance. And he knew what it was like to lose something dear to him. He could not deny someone what he had so freely indulged in.

But hindsight had granted him clarity to see what giving into the Dark Side that night had cost him. One step down that road justified by the necessity to protect innocent lives, and yes, by a need for revenge against those who had harmed his mother, had seemed excusable. Manageable. But it was one step he could not retreat, and there had been so many others he’d willingly, blindly, taken that had led him to Palpatine’s office chambers that night back on Coruscant. And those he could never take back either.

“Unfortunately for me the methods I used- giving into anger like that is corrupting. It’s… difficult to control the Force like that, and it’s compounding. The more you give in the more it traps you in a cycle of rage and hate, and it distorts everything you think and know. At first I thought I could control it, but… when I go back I won’t be able to stop it for a very long time and I will hurt many innocent people during that time. Including my wife, my closest friend, and even my own children.”

He had to pause and consider the rest of what Helena said.

“I’d never considered how it is for those who aren’t Force-sensitive. I always figured it was just easier for you to avoid being ruled by your emotions. I was wrong, it seems. I’m sorry, I know what it is like to lose yourself in something dark.”

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indelibleink
2012-11-02 06:52 am UTC (link)

The unspoken detail that Anakin killed the children as well was heard by Helena. She well knew what it was to not differentiate between the sins of those who actually committed the crimes and those associated with them. While Helena had managed to limit her killing Christina's murderers to only those responsible, but she had seen red. The lives she took after that, some of them were guilty, some were innocent of various crimes. And then there was a long list of people whose deaths she was responsible for but didn't actually kill. Everyone who had died because of the Joshua Trumpet, an artifact which had claimed two of her lovers. Then the two fellow Warehouse agents who had died because of her obsession with time travel artifacts. Sykes had been accurate when he'd said her body count was longer than his.

"Believe me, I did make them feel every bit of pain I felt before I killed them." And she had, oh she had. The one that had delivered the killing blow to her daughter had suffered the worst of it. Helena had let him linger longer, letting him feel what he had done to her heart and to her soul. Helena was definitely the type of person that when she was in pain to such a degree, she took it out on others, on the world.

As she listened to the explanation of how Anakin was corrupted, she though it sounded all too familiar. Emotions were powerful things, and Helena always felt hers strongly, sometimes too strongly. It was at this moment that she felt more like she had found a kindred soul in Anakin, someone who understood what it felt like to be ruled by anger and hate and to have to strive against it lest the emotions twist them.

"It is not an easy task to fight against such emotions when you feel them so strongly. Especially if they are sparked because of someone you love being ripped away from you." Looking at Anakin, she could see herself within him, knowing the struggle he was undoubtedly facing, and especially knowing he would do worse upon returning to his world. "I am sorry that there is more evil awaiting you when you return to your world. But I hope that sometime in the future, you are able to stop yourself, to turn yourself around. It is certainly not an easy task, but it is one more easily accomplished when there is someone there who believes in you and will do everything they can to stop you from falling further within your own darkness." Myka had done just that. When the fate of the entire planet had come down to Helena needing to strike the Trident only once more into the ground, Myka had found the way through to her.

"Some people are better at controlling their emotions. I, however, am not one of them. When I feel something strongly and deeply, it rather controls me. I was lost within my darkness for one hundred and twenty years. I nearly killed six billion people because of it. But I do hope that my darkness is behind me. I was trying to redeem myself when I ended up here." Helena paused a moment, her gaze growing distant for a few moments before she turned it back to Anakin. "I gave up my life to ensure the one I love lived."

She then turned back to the bunsen burner and checked on the state of the metal, which was finally beginning to melt down. Grabbing a glass rod, she poked at the melting vibranium, seeing how much of it had melted. Setting the glass rod aside, she went to adjust the position of the crucible, one finger finding its way between the open flame and the crucible. Crying out, she jerked her hand back.

"Oh bollocks!! Fucking bloody bollocks!!" Helena cursed sharply, quickly moving over to the nearest sink and ran the cold water, holding her burnt finger under the cold water. "Damn it all!!"

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