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Helena Wells-Quinzel is H.G. Wells (indelibleink) wrote in makebelievelog,

The unspoken detail that Anakin killed the children as well was heard by Helena. She well knew what it was to not differentiate between the sins of those who actually committed the crimes and those associated with them. While Helena had managed to limit her killing Christina's murderers to only those responsible, but she had seen red. The lives she took after that, some of them were guilty, some were innocent of various crimes. And then there was a long list of people whose deaths she was responsible for but didn't actually kill. Everyone who had died because of the Joshua Trumpet, an artifact which had claimed two of her lovers. Then the two fellow Warehouse agents who had died because of her obsession with time travel artifacts. Sykes had been accurate when he'd said her body count was longer than his.

"Believe me, I did make them feel every bit of pain I felt before I killed them." And she had, oh she had. The one that had delivered the killing blow to her daughter had suffered the worst of it. Helena had let him linger longer, letting him feel what he had done to her heart and to her soul. Helena was definitely the type of person that when she was in pain to such a degree, she took it out on others, on the world.

As she listened to the explanation of how Anakin was corrupted, she though it sounded all too familiar. Emotions were powerful things, and Helena always felt hers strongly, sometimes too strongly. It was at this moment that she felt more like she had found a kindred soul in Anakin, someone who understood what it felt like to be ruled by anger and hate and to have to strive against it lest the emotions twist them.

"It is not an easy task to fight against such emotions when you feel them so strongly. Especially if they are sparked because of someone you love being ripped away from you." Looking at Anakin, she could see herself within him, knowing the struggle he was undoubtedly facing, and especially knowing he would do worse upon returning to his world. "I am sorry that there is more evil awaiting you when you return to your world. But I hope that sometime in the future, you are able to stop yourself, to turn yourself around. It is certainly not an easy task, but it is one more easily accomplished when there is someone there who believes in you and will do everything they can to stop you from falling further within your own darkness." Myka had done just that. When the fate of the entire planet had come down to Helena needing to strike the Trident only once more into the ground, Myka had found the way through to her.

"Some people are better at controlling their emotions. I, however, am not one of them. When I feel something strongly and deeply, it rather controls me. I was lost within my darkness for one hundred and twenty years. I nearly killed six billion people because of it. But I do hope that my darkness is behind me. I was trying to redeem myself when I ended up here." Helena paused a moment, her gaze growing distant for a few moments before she turned it back to Anakin. "I gave up my life to ensure the one I love lived."

She then turned back to the bunsen burner and checked on the state of the metal, which was finally beginning to melt down. Grabbing a glass rod, she poked at the melting vibranium, seeing how much of it had melted. Setting the glass rod aside, she went to adjust the position of the crucible, one finger finding its way between the open flame and the crucible. Crying out, she jerked her hand back.

"Oh bollocks!! Fucking bloody bollocks!!" Helena cursed sharply, quickly moving over to the nearest sink and ran the cold water, holding her burnt finger under the cold water. "Damn it all!!"