Zoie (if_i_believe) wrote in light_of_may, @ 2014-05-28 22:41:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | 2009-10-07, nora, zoie |
Living in a crazy world
Who: Nora and Zoie
Where: UofM hospital --> their apartment
When: Early afternoon
Zoie was seated on the edge of the hospital bed, toying with the bandage that had been wrapped around her wrist while she waited for her sister to get back. Discharge papers had been issued and she was ready to go. Beyond ready. She had been ready days ago and then again when her mother had finally been convinced to leave - that had been a nail biter. For awhile there she had been sure that Angela Irving was going to tie her up and drag her back to Minnesota no matter what she wanted. And then she had needed to wonder whether or not she wanted to stay. Oh, Zoie loved being back in Scarlet Oak with her childhood-turned-penpal friends and living with Nora... Except the problem was living with Nora. Zoie adored her big sister and this chance to have as close to a normal life as someone like her could get, but the longer she was with her the more she started to think that she was nothing more than a drain on the other blonde. So Nora went out for a night to have a life. So? Why should she not be able to do that? How long had it been since she had? Zoie's heart twisted and the nasty little voice inside that had always existed whispered that it had been since her. Angela was older, her mother, and she wanted her to come home. If Zoie went home then she would not be a nuisance. Nora says I'm not a nuisance -- Nora wasn't there and I almost died. This was the war she had been fighting since she had woken up and fully realized what had happened.
Only... Zoie twisted the blanket in her fingers, ignoring how they shook.
Only... she bit at her lip at the sound of footsteps out in the hall.
Her large eyes dropped when Nora stepped into the room. Only Nora doesn't want me to go. She doesn't see me like I see me and she wants me to stay with her. Zoie had seen the pain in her sister's eyes clear as day and she had known, no matter what the nasty voices in her head might sometimes say, that Nora felt worse about what had happened than she ever could. And more than that, she honestly did not want her to leave. Had Zoie decided that yes, she needed to go, then she was certain that Nora would have let her leave. Just as Angel had not fought too hard when Zoie had made her decision to stay. They knew how important these little decisions could be to someone like her and they gave them to her. And I shouldn't keep punishing her just because she slipped up once. Zoie still did not know if she fully believed what Nora had said about why she had been gone, but she decided that right then, it was more important to pretend than to ask.
"Hi!" Zoie's voice was as chipper as she could make it. She tried to bounce up off the bed, though she stumbled a little, and moved to hug Nora as tightly as she ever would have. "I'm so ready to go home... tired of hospital food. Though you'd think that, like, my body would be fully adjusted to it and prefer it to everything else." Her smile was genuine, only a little flicker in her eyes showing that she was not at full peak. "You're ready to go, right? We can go? No one stopped you and said I have to stay?" Zoie thought she might go insane if that were the case.