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Beth H ([info]bethbethbeth) wrote in [info]hp_beholder,
@ 2012-04-14 10:26:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:beholder_2012, fic, het, petunia dursley, petunia/severus, rating:r, severus snape

FIC: "As You Say" for pale_moonlite
Recipient: Pale_Moonlite
Author: [info]lash_larue
Title: “As You Say”
Rating: PG-13 to mild R
Pairings: Petunia/Snape
Word Count: 16,800
Warnings/Content Information (Highlight to View): *[Infidelity, Non-explicit het sex]*.
Summary: After Lily's death Snape and Petunia are drawn to each other in an attempt to find something of Lily in the other. Neither of them is really sure what they find, but they find that they need it.
Author's Notes: The summary is from the prompt, I hope that it works for you, Pale_moonlite.
Thanks to Tetleythesecond and Therealsnape for having a look at this, the blame is all mine, however.

"As You Say"


(Don't forget to return to this page to leave feedback for the author!)

(Post a new comment)


[info]inspired_ideas
2012-04-14 03:48 pm UTC (link)
Beth, the link to the 'main IJ post' on this page needs to be updated to 'this page' so we don't get confused.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]bethbethbeth
2012-04-15 03:54 am UTC (link)
thank you! (I was out of town all day or I would have corrected this sooner)

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]ellenru
2012-04-14 04:51 pm UTC (link)
Mystery writer - this was brilliant. I loved that both Severus and Petunia retained all the hard edges of their characters and yet were able to set aside everything for those few hours each year. And the end scene just slayed me in all the best possible ways. As other have said regarding other stories - this fest can give pairings that shouldn't work (and that are not seen elsewhere) true strength. Bravo

And thanks for your hard work, Beth.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:26 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, I'm glad that it worked for you. It was interesting to do,

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)

Bravo
[info]inspired_ideas
2012-04-14 05:07 pm UTC (link)
This was amazing.

All the little details like the lard in the pie crust, stale cake at Mrs Figg's, and situations at Hogwarts each year from Severus' perspective were magnificent. The way the story builds and Petunia, Severus and even Wesley (nice touch with the 'as you wish say' theme there) come to accept and even enjoy things about each other is riveting.

I liked the way the sex was there but it wasn't really the point. It was need and want, forgetting and remembrance, all of it rolled together. Severus' words on avenging Lily were perfect. I was completely surprised by the ending. As a Severus Snape fan, it's good to think that there might be something of him left in the future of this universe.

Thank you so much for sharing such a wonderful tale with us.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Bravo
[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:31 pm UTC (link)
Thanks for the lovely comment! It's always nice when someone picks up on the little things, and I'm glad the ending surprised you.

It surprised me, a little.

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)

Squeeeeeee!!!
[info]pale_moonlight
2012-04-14 11:09 pm UTC (link)
Dear Mystery Author, Thank you so much for writing such a marvelous story for me! I love this Petunia and her journey. I lack sleep and words at the moment, but I'll be back with a longer review tomorrow. For now have my ♥♥♥

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Squeeeeeee!!!
[info]pale_moonlight
2012-04-16 06:50 am UTC (link)
I loved your Petunia almost immediately.

She was not, however, going to be ordered about by the old crackpot who had denied her the simple courtesy of being allowed to attend school with Lily, and the flourishing signature Professor Albus Dumbledore had her teeth grinding.

This definitely endeared her to me, as did her answer to Dumbledore's letter.

This said, you do a fantastic job at showing a realistic Petunia, not whitewashed but full of shades of grey. The structure of your story works really well: Showing only this special day throughout the years allows the reader to follow closely Petunia's change as well as to see her in a special light outside her usual surroundings. I love how you not only show her differences to Lily but also their similarities, how horse-faced Petunia can be beautiful, too.

I love the symbolism of the wilted lily blooming again. Especially the initial scene, when Petunia returns to the grave crying to see Snape doing his magic. Their bonding over this makes so much sense!

I love the slow buildup of their relationship and the way Petunia slowly starts to tolerate magic. Wesley is a wonderful OC to show this development.

Great use of the playground. Love that last scene between them in its urgency and despair!

And your Daisy Dursley must be the most original OC I've ever seen.

Thank you again for this brilliant gift!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: Squeeeeeee!!!
[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:34 pm UTC (link)
You're quite welcome!

I really enjoyed writing this, even though it sent me to the books on a regular basis to work out what happened when, ;)

The hard part was finding a remotely plausible way for them to actually be together, I'm very happy that it worked for you,

L

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: Squeeeeeee!!!
[info]pale_moonlight
2012-05-28 09:41 pm UTC (link)
I knew it was you. I KNEW it! I only didn't believe it because it's the second amazing fic you wrote for me in this fest. Thank you so much again! ♥

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]iulia_linnea
2012-04-15 02:44 pm UTC (link)
I enjoyed this story for its character development (you present both Petunia and Severus in a way that makes them more understandable without necessarily making them sympathetic), but it's your world-building in the character of Wesley that I will remember most: he's an excellent device for measuring Petunia's growing comfort with the magic that makes her comfortable, and he's so well-realised as a person as to make him anchor this view of the Potterverse for me.

What you do with structure in this fic is excellent, and as soon as I saw the daisy with the lily and petunia, I knew—and I squeed.

I do love this piece for its exploratory elements and how they all come together in Daisy. :)

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:36 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, I really worried about Daisy, but she just would not go away.

So glad you enjoyed it!

L

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[info]schemingreader
2012-04-15 05:20 pm UTC (link)
Oh, yeah, Petunia is such a Slytherin.

I like the slow progression toward their affair, their sense of propriety, and their bizarre hypocrisy in their treatment of Harry--totally canon and totally crazy to observe from their POV.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:37 pm UTC (link)
I'm pretty sure Petunia would have sorted Slytherin, yes.

I am also pleased that their regard of Harry worked for you, thank you for commenting,

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]atdelphi
2012-04-15 05:26 pm UTC (link)
This was about the point that I knew I was going to like your Petunia...

Mister Dumbledore,

You will make arrangements for me to attend my sister’s funeral or I shall leave the child on the steps of a police station. You took her from me in life, you will not deny me my chance to say farewell.

Mrs. Petunia Dursley

...and could already foresee how she and Snape would get along. That "Mister" - just perfect.

I love stories that take canon and flip the perspective entirely. Here, Snape and Petunia's feelings about Harry move entirely out of the realm of cartoon and into something sadly believable. I really enjoyed how their relationship grew visit by visit, summed up so aptly by this:

"Why are we here?" she asked.

"Because we can't let her go," he answered, and he handed her a handkerchief.

Poignant, understated, and beautifully characterized. Well done, Mystery Author.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:41 pm UTC (link)
My thanks.

There is a reason for everything, I think, and I'm glad this one worked for you insofar as their feelings for Harry went.

Thanks too for noticing that little exchange, it was one of my favorites.

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]therealsnape
2012-04-15 05:46 pm UTC (link)
Stories like this are why I love Beholder.

Take an unlovable character. Keep all the canon details we know of her. Turn them into a believable, three-dimensional character.

Petunia still isn't always lovable. She does mistreat Harry. We do get to see a reason for that, however. Even though reasons can never be excuses in this case.

But we do get to see Petunia on the one day of the year which is truly hers. We do get to see her through the eyes of complete outsider Wesley. (Mate, I agree on the notion of getting rid of Vernon. That woman knows what's what in the kitchen. And, she's kind enough to cook for you.)

And the way you let us believe in the Severus/Petunia relationship; the beautiful build-up of the story, wow. And the way you show us how they need each other, but without prettifying the relationship, wow again.


(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:46 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, I'm guessing you knew this was mine, huh? ;)

Thanks for your help on this one, and I almost gave Daisy Wesley's last name, but was afraid it would be confusing. Of course Petunia dumped Vernon for Wesley... or Wesley whacked him. Wesley was a hit wizard before he was a cab driver.

L

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[info]kelly_chambliss
2012-04-16 03:23 am UTC (link)
What a good read. As [info]therealsnape says, you do a fine job of making both characters understandable and complexly human at the same time that you don't excuse them or paper over their flaws. I think the food motif works very well, too, as a barometer of Petunia's changes and the growth of her relationships with both the wizards in her life, Wesley and Severus. The reborn lily becomes a metaphor for the entire story: all the main characters are withered; all come back to life. Petunia and Severus both get Lily back, metaphorically speaking; they renew themselves; they create a new life.

You've created such a full and detailed world here; great job.

I'd write a longer review, but you've made me too desperate for roast beef on rye with good mustard and sharp cheddar. I'll be in the kitchen. . .

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:47 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, and I hope you enjoyed your sandwich!

L

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[info]wwmrsweasleydo
2012-04-16 09:46 am UTC (link)
A lovely story! I really enjoyed how you explored Petunia's canon motivation through it. And a lovely and unexpected ending!

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:48 pm UTC (link)
Thank you so much! I'm glad the ending worked for you, I was a bit worried about it.

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]tetleythesecond
2012-04-16 02:05 pm UTC (link)
Oh wow, I love this! You really bring them to life; I love how you show us their perspective without prettying them up, and the variations of the yearly ritual work great -- reflecting what is happening in the wizarding world from their side.

"It was not wonderful. It was not dreamlike.
It was two people coming together out of overwhelming needs of several kinds.
It was an unaccustomed activity for them both."

This made me tear up a bit.

The first Beholder story I've managed to read this year, and what a wonderful start! ♥

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:57 pm UTC (link)
Well, to be fair, you'd already read like half of it...

Thank you for your help and reassurance on this one, and of course I'm pleased that you did not think it stunk too badly.

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]pauraque.dreamwidth.org
2012-04-16 03:28 pm UTC (link)
I really enjoyed this. It fits perfectly into canon and enriches what we know of these characters and their stories. The plain-spoken style lends it a stark quality that I think is very effective, and evokes the sadness and longing that they feel.

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[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 08:58 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, I am very pleased that the style worked for you. It was a bit different for me,

L

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[info]zweiundzwei
2012-04-16 10:42 pm UTC (link)
OMG, I love this story, this was fantastic, this is why I love the beholder, I just want to jump up and down, omg. :D

Snape and Petunia were simply perfect. Everyone mentioned this already, but her letter to Dumbledore was great, and so was her gradual warming to her day of magic.

She watched as he cut the lard into the flour for the crust, obscurely pleased that he was using the old ways without regard to modern notions of healthy cooking, however valid they might be.

She also watched the play of muscles under his skin, the lean forearms exposed by his rolled-up sleeves. She was fascinated by his utter absorption in the task, his total and effortless concentration. Things stirred inside her again, and she realized with surprise that she could name them this time, unusual though they might be.

[...]

But just now, on this day, in this place, with its magic and its memories and its might have beens, with the patently absurd sight of a powerful wizard with a skull and a snake tattooed on his forearm making a lamb pie for her she realized and admitted to herself that she simply wanted this man.

I'm sorry for overquoting here, but that entire sequence was just perfect, and also, jesus, hot, which is not something I ever really associate with Snape.


When Marge mentioned the niece she'd like I immedeately thought that Petunia's and Snape's daughter would be formidable, and then was sad because I couldn't figure out the logistics. And you did it!

I am incoherent and in love.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:01 pm UTC (link)
Well, I have to admit that I find this comment rather encouraging.

Feel free at any time to tell me something I have done is perfect, I can take limitless amounts of abuse like that!

I think I love you too, thanks so much for this wonderful comment, and my compliments on your icon... damn.

L

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[info]alisanne
2012-04-17 02:35 pm UTC (link)
Wow.
The characterizations here are really masterful and how you somehow managed to make me see (and sympathize with!) Petunia's POV I will never know. *shakes head*
DD's heavy handed treatment of her, combined with her recognition that Severus was suffering Lily's loss as much (if not more) as she was was brilliantly handled. And I admit, I thought her reaction to hearing that Severus had killed DD was PERFECT. *g*
Wesley! OMG, so fun. I loved all his thoughts about offing Vernon. *giggles* And the food details rang very true.
Also it made total sense that, when seen through Petunia's and Severus' eyes, Harry was a nuisance. *sigh*
DAISY DURSLEY! OMG. I adore her already.
Seriously great work here, mystery author. Well done!

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:04 pm UTC (link)
Many thanks!

Heck, somebody needed to do something about Vernon.

Daisy went on to be Captain of the dueling team, got straight "O's" on her NEWTs, and became an Unspeakable.

L

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[info]lastscorpion
2012-04-21 06:11 am UTC (link)
OMG this story is awesome!!! Snape/Petunia has been my HP OTP since, like, the second book. This is so believable! I really, really loved it. My favorite lines were On Lily’s birthday the world was a different place entire. and Wesley in the meantime had finished his first sandwich and had begun to wonder if he could get away with removing Mr. Dursley. and “As is mine. I cannot rid myself of that boy, I have learned to appreciate magic and can never have it, my sister is forever gone, and my family is in danger. ‘Gentle’, is not on my mind, Severus.” Wesley is a terrific OC. And I loved the ending! Thank you so much for writing and posting this story!

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[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:08 pm UTC (link)
You are very welcome, and thank you for this wonderful comment!

I am also gladdened by your choice of lines, I rahter liked those too.

L

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[info]winterwitch
2012-04-21 09:28 pm UTC (link)
This is truly brilliant! I so love it when characters are kept so well in canon, but at the same time taken out of the context, looked at closely, and given a three-dimensional, realistic life beyond what we read and see. Of course Petunia and Severus would react differently with each other, and would react different under the circumstances they meet, and the reasons for that. And how very fitting that they an find comfort and consolation within each other, and with their small time-out at this special day, once a year. At first glance, they look so different from how we know them, but at second glance, we recognise it as a hidden part of them.

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[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:13 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, I'm very happy that you feel that I made this plausible. It was an interesting challenge of the story, so I am relieved that it worked for you.

Also, 'brilliant', is always nice to hear, ;)

L

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[info]donnaimmaculata
2012-04-25 12:54 pm UTC (link)
I started reading this and got so wrapped up in Petunia's PoV that Snape's appearance took me entirely by surprise; I had forgotten I was reading a Petunia/Snape fic. I've always liked the potential of this pairing, they've got so much in common - especially when it came to light that they've known each other for most of their lives. Their day - Lily's day - is so bittersweet. I'm glad they had the chance to have it.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:15 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, I kind of thought that they must have known each other as children, at least in some degree. It seemed at least possible that they would be brought together by their memories of Lily.

L

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[info]fluffyllama
2012-04-27 12:24 pm UTC (link)
Wonderful, I really enjoyed this. I always thought that with a bit of thawing on Petunia's part about the magic these two would get along, and you portrayed it beautifully without losing any of the Petunia we see in the books. Great job, mystery author!

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:21 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, I am very pleased that it worked for you.

I appreciate your reading and commenting!

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]squibstress
2012-04-27 03:17 pm UTC (link)
Love, love, love this Petunia. I love how you start with the angry, embittered woman we see in canon and then open her up to make her seem a living, breathing woman.

When she first sees Snape at the graveside, one has an inkling, of course, of where the story is headed, but the way you develop the relationship over time is fresh and totally believable.

The addition of Wesley and the food is also a wonderful way to develop character and reveal emotion without resorting to fusty narrative.

Wonderful, wonderful fic!

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:25 pm UTC (link)
Thank you!

So glad that you enjoyed it, and that it was believable for you,

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]albalark
2012-05-08 02:19 pm UTC (link)
I am sorry, Mystery Author, that I have taken so long to comment on this marvelous fic - I read it on the day it appeared and it left me speechless with admiration. This is one of those stories in which no word is out of place, and that the farther you get into it, the more right it seems. It took up residence in my heart and has stayed there - it's my favorite of the fest that I have read so far. :-)

Your Petunia is so very real! You have taken a caricature of a character and made her complex and nuanced without making her unrecognizable and that is a coup indeed! Her reply to Dumbledore at Harry's appearance is just perfect, and my first clue that I was going to understand her and perhaps even admire her by the end.

And your Severus is exactly as I imagined him here. One gets the idea that in the beginning he was grasping at anything he could find in Petunia which would remind him of his lost Lily, but that with every passing year he could see the sisterly resemblance in more than their styles of disapproval. This captures it so well:

Petunia dabbed her eyes, grateful for the courtesy, and also grateful for the company. This man that she had despised for years was the only link she had to Lily, the only one who understood the loss, who really knew what Lily had meant to her.

"I regret that I was rude to you when we were children," Petunia said softly. "I was jealous. She cared more for you than me."

"I was thinking the same thing."

It began to snow, as it had the year before, but this time they stood together as it fell and watched the snow cover the name of the girl they both had loved. This time they stood together and clung to whatever bit of Lily they could each find in the other.

It makes very much sense that eventually they would begin to take comfort in each other, and to value each other independently of their other connection.

Wesley is a terrific OC - he fits in beautifully, and I really love how Petunia induces his loyalty first with politeness and her regular visits to someone he must have considered a heroine, and then with good food - a perfect example of casting one's bread upon the waters, if ever there was one. *g*

I loved the unexpected ending, too. :-) Thank you for a wonderful read - it's definitely going on my 'keeper' list.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:28 pm UTC (link)
Pray don't mention the delay, no doubt you were busy x-raying your mail.

Glad you liked it, and thanks!

L

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(Anonymous)
2012-05-22 01:33 am UTC (link)
Excellent progression in character interaction and plot. Thank you.

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[info]lash_larue
2012-05-27 09:28 pm UTC (link)
You're most welcome, and thank you.

L

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[info]snapelike
2012-06-02 08:41 pm UTC (link)
What a great read. I didn't know what to expect. I don't read much het and very little if no Petunia. But I am so happy I started reading this; it was an intense and very interesting fic.

At '"And that bastard Potter's face, I am informed," Snape added with a heavy sigh. "It is an obscene conjugation."' you had me entirely; from there it only became more bitter-sweet and wonderful. I was impressed with the slow, thorough character development, with the dialogue and your perfect understanding of what drove the two. I particularly liked how you also kept Potter out of the fic, that he was there only mentioned as this annoying appendix to a family which doesn't want him.

As a side character, your Vernon was spot on, precisely as I imagine him.

Great plot overall, and the repeated return to Lily's grave made a great structure. A most enjoyable read.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-06-05 02:17 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, I appreciate your taking a chance on it, and I'm very happy that it worked for you.

I very much thought that this was something that had to be just between the two of them, Harry was a side note that further bound them together.

Thanks again,
L

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]lookfar
2012-06-15 11:10 am UTC (link)
Oh, this made me cry, and that almost never happens with fan fiction. I was rooting for them and their sad, odd friendship and completely surprised by the ending. What I especially liked about this is the gradual change in Pentunia - her acceptance of magic, her realization of Lily's love and her general loosening up. I love the way you worked it around the canon plot and your invention of Wesley (on loan from The Princess Bride, no doubt). Great job - beautiful, original story.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lash_larue
2012-06-23 04:28 pm UTC (link)
Thank you for your kind words, I'm glad that the story worked for you,

L

(Reply to this) (Parent)

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