|Dr. Ellis Shepherd (ellis_grey) wrote in freedomtownic,|
@ 2021-05-12 21:42:00
|Entry tags:||ellis shepherd (ellis_grey), tess darling (fightforthelost)|
Who: Ellis and Tess (feat. Kenny)
Where: The End Zone, driving, then Ginny and Tess's house
When: Directly after this network post
Status: Closed; Complete
After exchanging a few private messages on the network, Tess decided to collect Ellis from The End Zone in an attempt to get her away from alcohol for the rest of the night (it might not seem like much of a first step, but at least it was a start). She walked into the bar, decked out all in black, and spotted Ellis immediately. "Jesus," she muttered to herself, having spotted a half-empty bottle of Jack Daniels on the bartop in front of her. She walked over to her and the first thing she did was grab that bottle and put it behind the bar out of reach. She practically glared at Kenny, but decided to drop the argument about responsible service of alcohol for another time. Right now, she was here for Ellis. "Hey cutie," she said softly. "Told ya I'd come and getcha."
Ellis looked her over with a semi-drunken, lecherous grin and chuckled. "God, that's hot. Now I kinda want you to ride my face like a mechanical bull." Ellis looked, honestly, like the stereotypical 'burned-out rock star'. She looked sexy as hell in a tight black midriff top with pleated plaid skirt and black stockings with army boots, her hair teased slightly, but her face was heartbreakingly crushed. All the beauty in the world couldn't hide how much pain she was in.
Tess chuckled. "Classy." She took hold of Ellis's shoulders and helped her to her feet, showing a surprising amount of strength in her ability to keep the other woman steady. "C'mon, sweetie. I'm gonna take you back to my place. Ginny's got the spare bed all ready and made up for ya." She'd have to fill Ellis full of water, too; but first she had to get her out of the bar first.
"Hot damn, I haven't had a threesome in a long time..." Ellis laughed, nearly tripping over herself before Tess steadied her. "Byeeee, handsome..." She said with a grin as she winked to Kenny, who just looked, honestly, embarrassed for her.
She was a trainwreck, huh? "If anyone comes askin' for her, you send them to me," Tess told Kenny. For the way that Ellis was acting you'd think that she didn't have anyone, but surely that wasn't the case. Still holding onto her, Tess led her out of the bar and over to a parked convertible. "And you, lady? Get your mind out of the gutter."
The only people Ellis really had left were the daughter she'd adopted with Arizona, who mostly lived with her fiance now, and her best friend, who'd been staying with Victor Von Doom a lot as of late. Otherwise, she mostly had Skylar Bale. Who, god bless her, wasn't the best influence at times.
"You're gonna regret this." Ellis told her flatly, the humor fading from her voice. "Suuuure, you're all 'good samaritan' right now, but keep this up and I'm gonna break down, and then you're gonna be stuck attending the Ellis Shepherd Pity Party."
"Ellis," Tess repeated. She actually didn't know her name. She helped Ellis into the passenger seat, then rounded the car to jump in the driver's seat. "Well, Ellis. At least you won't be partying alone anymore," she decided. While she hadn't had the chance to say it, prior to her arrival on Galador, Tess was a hardcore alcoholic, so she'd been where Ellis had. Maybe not exactly the same situation, but close enough to it that it was like looking in the mirror. "Put your seat belt on."
"Anyone ever tell you you're hot when you get all dom?" Ellis asked with a wry laugh, still drunk but for more sullen now. This whole thing had managed to take away the playful edge she'd had going. Still, she did as told, fumbling with the seat belt for a few moments before finally snapping it into place.
"Few people," Tess muttered as she put her own seat belt on. She gave Ellis a chance to get situated before starting the car and driving them back to her home. The majority of people on Galador tended to rely on the tram to get where they needed to be, but you still saw the occasional revhead with a car. "So, are we gonna talk about what's really been bothering you, or are you just gonna keep dicking around?"
"Why do you fucking care so much?" Ellis asked her, clearly frustrated by this. "At first I thought maybe you were a well-meaning fan or something, but you clearly have no idea who I am. So... do you just go around playing Phantom Samaritan for hot drunks or something?"
Fair question. "I saw someone in pain. I saw someone who was going down the same road that I've been down and... it's a dark and lonely place." Tess paused, wanting to make sure that she had the wording right. She wasn't there to be a dick to the woman. "I had friends to help me, and I'm sure that you do too, but they don't know what it is to feel so broken that you feel hollow inside. Like a shell of who you once were. They don't know what complete despair feels like. They don't know what it feels like to just want to disappear. Who would care, right? It would be so much easier to just give up. To drink yourself into oblivion and hope that you don't ever have to wake up to feel it all over again." Tess fell silent again. Talking about it was bringing up a lot of old emotions. "But what do I know, right?" She murmured.
"Every night." Ellis mumbled, so quietly an average person might not have even heard her. "Every night I keep hoping... that the last drink I take will be the last drink I take." She said, sniffling and turning to stare out the window. "That I'll black out and not wake up. So I won't have to hurt anymore."
Thankfully Tess wasn't an average person. "I know. For me... putting myself back together was hard. Hardest thing I've ever done in my life. I knew how to hurt people. I knew how to get them to stay away. I was very good at it, too." She'd never forgive herself for how she'd treated her previous girlfriend, Nikki, but that's a story for another time. "It was easier to keep my distance, I reasoned. Easier not to love anyone ever again. Easier to just... hide myself in that bottle. I wanted to die every single day." She glanced at Ellis briefly. They had that in common. "I wish that I could say that it was easy, crawling out of that hole. There were so many times where I just--" She stopped and fell silent. "I guess my point is that you don't have to be alone. You're not alone. And if you need someone to care, then I fucking care because God help me, that's not a feeling that I would wish on you, me or anyone."
"In my world? I would never have been able to be with her." Ellis admitted, taking a deep breath. "She was much older than me. My friend's mom, actually. But god, she was so beautiful. She was how I realized I liked girls to begin with. But I kept my mouth shut, you know? Because that's not the kind of thing you tell a friend. But when I got here... and she was here too, but at the age she was at when I was a kid. Here... we were only about ten years apart. I had to have her. I had to get her to notice me."
Tess nodded, listening. She could be a bull in a china shop with the best of intentions, but at least she knew when to shut up and when to ask the right questions. "... I'm guessing you got her to notice you," she murmured.
"It wasn't hard to get her attention looking like this." Ellis admitted, still staring off into the night sky. "Problem was getting her to want more than hookups in the on-call room. It took a while to get her to look past the awkwardness of who I was, even from a different timeline. But god, once I finally won her heart... I made her body whole again, and she made my heart whole again."
Tess nodded again. She had a good idea of how this story was going to end, but it was Ellis's story to tell and she was there to listen. She pulled the car into a parking spot near the home that she shared with Ginny, but let the engine idle for now, and turned toward Ellis to show the other woman that she had her full attention.
"We got married... we made the kids we'd each taken in our family... but then that goddamn gem took it all. Before the purge ended, it took my mother, my sister, my adopted daughter, and my wife." She sighed, unbuckling her seat belt so she could pull her knees up, curling into almost a ball. "She's gone and there's literally nothing I can do to get her back."
"No," Tess agreed softly. "I know it's cliche to ask: but what kind of life would your wife want you to have? What kind of life would any of them want you to have, with them gone?" She paused, wondering if she was being helpful or just rubbing salt into the open wound. "Would it be too much to ask you to fight for them? Fight for their memory, fight for what you had, fight for the lost?" She felt like a dick for saying it, but it also had to be said. "Because if you loved your family at all, and it sounds like you do, then you owe it to yourself to try. And you sure as hell owe it to them to try."
"You don't have to give me the 'what would they want' shpiel. I've heard it a hundred times already. Next verse, same as the first." Ellis sighed, shaking her head. "I tried thinking like that. And it actually worked for a while. I tried to put on a happy face, I even tried to date again. I went out with my friend Tifa for quite a few months. But in the end, you can't force yourself to be happy if you're not."
Tess chuckled huskily and drummed her fingertips on the steering wheel. "Guess I can't talk, really. Back home, everyone left, and I was alone. My family, my support system, all gone. I was trying for them more than I was trying for me. But then they left and there was just this... void. Not gonna lie, I was fall down drunk when I got here. I needed them and they left and I was alone. For so long. I tried, but--" She paused and waggled a hand airly next to her head. "I think I took a swing at Rachelle as soon as I saw her, but that part's kinda vague." She sighed. "Guess that part's not really helpful, huh."
"I'd never hit Rachelle." Ellis chortled, trying not to laugh. "Bitch scares the shit outta me. When I was on Idol, I used to dread the part where I'd have to get her opinion, because if she hated it? It was gonna be ugly."
"Hmm, I dunno," Tess lilted. "Sometimes she deserves a good smack upside the head. Guess I must be the only person stupid or brave enough to try it, though." She nibbled on her bottom lip thoughtfully, then shrugged. "I guess we find a way to make you happy."
"...I could go down on you here in this car." Ellis suggested,raising an eyebrow. "Can't say that wouldn't make me very happy..."
Tess's eyebrows shot up. "I'm... gonna neglect telling my girlfriend that you said that. I mean, Ginny's sweet as pie, but don't think for a second that she won't kick your ass." She killed the engine and hopped out of the car. "Only thing you're getting tonight is a warm, comfortable bed." She leaned into the interior and pointed a finger in emphasis. "Alone."
"You sure?" Ellis laughed, still definitely drunk, although sobered up enough now to definitely know what was coming out of her mouth. "I could always join you both..." Was she being serious? Trying to piss Tess off? Trying to deflect attention from the problem at hand? Probably a little of each, to be honest.
While Tess could see what Ellis was trying to do, it did still have the effect of pissing her off. She took in a breath and let it out slowly. Anger issues. "Stop it. Just stop it." She pointed her finger again. "Get your ass outta the car and come inside."
"Must've had you going for a minute there to get you so mad..." Ellis mumbled, smirking to herself as she stumbled out of the car. "Guess it would be futile to ask if you got any alcohol in the house...:"
"I'll take 'asked and answered for $200, Alex'," Tess muttered, sighing again. This woman was going to be a royal pain in the ass. She could feel it. Still, she'd been through the worst of it and came out the other side. She could only hope that Ellis was strong enough to do the same.
"You'll give up on me. I guarantee it." Ellis chuckled, almost falling over before managing to regain her balance. "I'm a shitty person, and you just need to see that."
Tess gently took hold of one of Ellis's forearms to help balance her. This woman was a trainwreck. "You're not a shitty person. You're in pain. There's a difference." She led Ellis over to the front door and helped her into the home that she shared with Ginny. "Although if you come on to my girlfriend I may have to smack a bitch." She meant it playfully more than anything.
"Hey... if she's half as hot as you, I'm more than up for a threesome. Just putting it out there." Ellis giggled drunkenly, hanging on to the woman for dear life. "The girl Arizona took in... she's still here. So's her kid. Current and future versions. And guess who's too busy drinkin' her sorrows away to pay any attention to them?"
"Mmm, three guesses and the first two don't count," Tess murmured. She gently kicked the front door shut with her heel before making her way to the guest bedroom, having no trouble keeping hold of Ellis. "Have they contacted you at all?" She couldn't help it but ask. Maybe they could find a way to help Ellis.
"Yeah... they're good kids. They wanna help me... I wish I could let them. I just don't think I can be helped anymore..." She mumbled, her mood souring again as she said the words.
"You know I don't believe that," Tess murmured. "Even if you are an ornery drunk." She flipped on the light switch in the bedroom to guide the way over to the bed. She plopped Ellis onto her ass on the mattress. "You're not gonna vom on me during the night, are you?"
"Sorry, hot stuff. I got a lotta kinks, but that's not one of 'em." Ellis giggled, winking at her. Good god was she going to be ashamed when she sobered up...
At least she got a chuckle out of Tess that time. She knelt down briefly to help Ellis out of her shoes. "Alright, cutie," she lightly smacked Ellis's thigh, "why don't you get cosy and I'll get to sortin' you out with some water and ibuprofen for the morning."
"Just remember... m'here if you and The Mrs decide you want a third..." Ellis said, yawning and just honestly looking ready to pass out right then and there. She wanted to thank Tess. To tell her she was truly a wonderful person for doing this. But right now.. her brain just wasn't functioning on that level.
"Mhm. I'll keep that in mind," Tess murmured, not meaning it in the slightest. She left the room, giving Ellis a chance to get changed or promptly fall asleep, and returned little more than a minute later with a couple of ibuprofen tablets and a bottle of water.