I apologize and explain what has happened, but all I get in return is anger and insults--occasionally even refusal to believe my diagnosis and counter diagnoses, if you can believe that!
Unfortunately, this isn't hard to believe. The problem comes from people online who do use disorders, injuries, and diseases [sometimes real, sometimes not real] to excuse various behaviors.
Personally, I can't see not putting people on moderation when they ask to be, but I've been told I can be more understanding than most people online.
Generally, the problem fandom has is the same problem any large group will have. It's that when we get in large groups, we tend to not be as understanding or patient with others. We forget that other people have issues and feelings that made differ from ours.
However, you occasionally do manage to find those people who are truly great friends and patient people. That is what makes fandom great, the chance to meet those people.