jordan thomas | the beast (dreambeast) wrote in fableless, @ 2017-08-09 18:38:00 |
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Entry tags: | ! texts/phone, # epilogue, jordan thomas, naveen kamala |
WHO: Jordan Thomas & Naveen Kamala
WHEN: July 2017 - June 2018
WHERE: Woodsbridge, CA and Mound, MN
SUMMARY: The story of how these two crazy kids got together. (Not really. Just a budding friendship told through text messages.)
WARNINGS: So long. But it's texts, so it reads quick? I got nothing.
STATUS: Complete!
[1] Hey loser where u at?
[2] I donβt actually know what u do
[1] minnesota
[2] i run a consulting firm
[1] Is that one of the corn states?
[2] Also that doesnβt sound like a real thing
[1] uhhhh NO
[2] itβs the one with all of the lakes
[3] and lol ofc it doesnβt to you
[4] bc no one would pay to listen to you π
[1] like half them them have lakes. And corn. Is it the cheese one?
[2] So youβre unemployed
[1] thatβs wisconsin GOD do u not even know basic geography????
[2] iβll tell sum to get you a map for xmas
[3] and lol no
[4] i run multimillion $$ company
[1] Uh all those states are boring and hate brown people. Thats enough geography
[2] Sounds like a lie
[1] uh WOW
[2] what do u want?? bc i know u arenβt just texting to say hi
[1] Its true
[2] Idk. I was bored.
[1] ok but like
[2] go be bored
[3] SOMEWHERE ELSE
[1] UH I AM
[2] Cause Im not at cheeseville
[3] So are u like permagone?
[1] omg i am NOT in cheeseville iβm in lakeville
[2] and no
[3] only like
[4] summer gone???
[5] iβm gone until the next semester starts
[6] why?? miss me? π
[1] Cheese. Lakes. All boring
[2] Youβre just so easy to annoy
[3] Itβs like not having my favorite toy around
[1] i get that u donβt have a life
[2] but this is kinda pathetic
[3] and boring for me
[4] and since i have ACTUAL work to do
[5] bye
[1] Still pretty sure youβre lying.
[2] Have fun with the cheese!
[1] [picture of a cupcake]
[1] [picture of a better cupcake]
[1] [picture of a cupcake and matching cakepops]
[1] [picture of a cupcake and matching cake]
[1] [picture of a cake pop going into a chocolate fountain]
[1] [picture of a cake that is an actual working chocolate fountain]
[1] [A piecaken]
[1] ok BUT that looks disgusting????
[1] u should be more adventurous
[1] UM i actually CARE about not dying of DIABETES?
[1] u could eat a vegetable after if thatβs what youβre worried about
[1] i think youβd need like
[2] an ENTIRE crate of veggies
[1] Well that just sounds like torture.
[1] torture is prolonged interaction w/ u
[1] πππ
[2] I knew u cared
[1] ok like
[2] donβt get excited
[3] but iβm back next week
[1] I get excited about Food and Girls. In that order.
[2] So are u bringing me 1 or the other?
[1] iβm bringing you nothing
[2] π
[1] Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame
[2] Back for the school year then?
[1] yup
[2] six more classes and then im done
[1] Doing the full year or trying to knock it out in half?
[1] full
[2] lol no way i can do it in half for a ma program
[3] not and live
[1] And then fucking off from Woodsbridge forever?
[1] idk? probs?
[2] like, weβre opening an office in sf and weβre talking about a satellite in hk
[3] so iβd have to open that too
[1] Whoβs the we?
[1] me and viv
[2] sheβs my co-ceo
[1] Is that a name I should know?
[2] Serious question. Not ringing a bell
[1] nope bc u donβt really know much about my work stuff
[1] Not a tale then?
[1] she is
[2] one of the only ones i knew before coming here, actually
[3] her and my pediatrician
[1] That makes sense
[2] IDK my cousin and siblings were all tales so not knowing them seems kinda weird cause I was last
[3] I guess Mag didnβt really know any.
[1] mag??
[2] yeah iβm the only one in my family so it was super weird to them
[1] Magdalena
[2] Iβm not even the only witch in mine
[3] Just the best one
[1] right
[2] r u really the best one though??
[3] π
[1] Duh, the best for last.
[1] idk doesnβt that make u like
[2] the spare?
[3] or the spare of the spare???
[1] I have three siblings.
[2] And no, Iβm the favorite.
[1] uh huh
[2] like thatβs not hard tho??
[3] the youngest is ALWAYS the favorite
[4] itβs not like u earned it
[1] Uh, donβt care? Cause Iβm still the favorite
[2[ So youβre going to go get food with me right?
[1] uh why would i do that?
[2] we hate each other
[1] I donβt hate you
[2] Thatβs a you problem
[1] ok
[2] vastly dislike then
[1] No thatβs still a you problem
[1] β¦
[2] u just want me to buy u food, donβt u.
[1] Both can be true πππ
[1] β¦
[2] i am SO going to regret this
[3] u buy dessert tho
[1] Deal! See you next week
[1] Hey
[2] Heeeeeeeeeeeeey
[3] HeEeEeEeEy
[4] Do you ever think about them?
[1] navy
[2] its like
[3] 1 AM
[4] and i have a test tomorrow
[5] y
[1] IDK some girl I was talking to started going on about past life shit
[2] and wow it is 1 am
[3] And tests are dumb
[1] i said y i think about them
[2] but why is some girl ur talking to talking about past lives?
[3] theyβre PAST for a reason
[4] ok i GUESS we can agree on something
[1] oooooooooooooh
[2] caus y & y
[3] but idk she was hot so i like half paid attention
[4] so now im thinking about them
[1] omg u are hopeless
[2] didnβt you like
[3] PUNISH ME
[4] bc i was shallow or something???
[5] what r u thinking about them??
[1] ok but like she was hot
[2] and are we talking about like the beast???
[3] cause that was about being rude
[4] idk they were like happy and shit
[5] and she had that like law thing
[1] if u came to my door and demanded a place to sleep, iβd be rude to u too
[2] they were happy
[3] and they loved each other
[4] but like
[5] they also had WAY different lives than us??
[1] cause ur shitty about ancient laws and shit
[2] it makes like fairy sense u dont get it
[3] thre are like rules
[4] yeah they were way different just its weird
[5] idk
[6] i should probably go home
[1] wait
[2] ur not home?????
[3] uhhhh where r u??
[1] idk was at some party
[2] but got bored so I left
[3]walking home
[1] well at least ur walking
[2] text me when u get home
[3] and drink like FIVE cups of water
[1] awwwwwwwwwww
[2] ur worried
[3] u liiiiiiiiiiike meeeeeeeeee
[1] iβm only a LITTLE worried
[2] doesnβt mean i like u
[1] ur in like with me
[2] i knnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww iiiiiiiiiit
[1] nvm i hope u fall off a cliff and die
[1]
[2] niiiiiiiiiiiiight
[1] what r u doing for thanksgiving??
[1] idk
[2] used to go wherever Leela went
[3] Talia might have something planned
[1] hmm
[2] ok
[1] u have plans?
[1] nope
[2] probably going to start marathoning xmas movies
[3] and eat pizza
[1] wanna go wherever I go?
[2] odds are being the asshole at the Whittakers
[3] or Ravi dragging me back to the fucking farm.
[1] um iβll pass thanks
[2] bc i donβt want people getting the wrong idea
[3] and i donβt want to crash someone elseβs party
[1] uh what idea?
[2] its food
[1] unless itβs like, an open friends thing, u usually only bring bfs/gfs to those things
[1] unless u became a girl
[2] No ones gonna think that
[1] well OBVIOUSLY
[1] so what's the problem?
[1] idk
[2] principle i guess
[1] of not eating other people's food??
[1] crashing someone elseβs party
[2] also u
[1] its not crashing if ur invited
[2] and what about me??
[1] hmmmmmmm ok maybe
[2] i just like being mean to u
[1] u wanna pull my pigtails go ahead
[2] ur the one missing out on food not me
[1] um no bc ur hair is greasy like ur soul
[2] if talia is cool with me going, iβll go
[3] otherwise idk i can go to sf and have thanksgiving with my brother or smthg
[1] my hair is gorgeous and donβt u dare insult is
[2] eh sheβll be cool
[3] and if its at the farm as if theyβd tell me no
[1] uhhh not really my hair is nicer
[2]ok but like
[3] u actually have to ASK her if itβs ok ok?
[1] Uh no itβs not
[2] UGH fine
[3] But shell say yes
[1] π
[1] donβt miss me too much when iβm gone
[1] new phone who dis?
[2] kidding
[3] are u dying?
[1] sorry wrong number
[2] meant to text someone i liked
[3] no im going home for xmas
[1] Well that sounds boring
[1] uhhh how does that sound boring???
[2] my family is cool
[3] and thereβs REAL snow
[1] ahuh sure maybe urs is cool
[2] so whereβs home with this βreal snowβ?
[1] minnesota
[2] u know
[3] the same place i went home to last summer
[1] oh! Cheese place!
[1] omg itβs not
[2] nvm y cheese place
[1] bring me back one of those cheese heads.
[1] i only bring things back for people i like sry
[1] ok so make sure it fits my head then
[1] why did i decide to go for a second masters?????
[1]
[1] i would TOTALLY rather watch that than read this stupid chapter on incremental growth
[1] I feel like I learned about that in one of my classes
[2] Movies are better
[1] maybe?? the emperorβs new clothes is a tale, and like, thatβs what thatβs based on??
[2] iβm gonna watch it
[1] No I mean the incremental growth whatever
[2] But you totally should
[1] really?? what did u major in?
[2] i GUESS if u want, u can come over and watch it w me
[1] My majors in business. With like a focus in finance or whatever
[2] Yeah sure, not like I was going to study.
[1] srsly? never took u for a bsns major huh
[2] come over & bring cupcakes
[1] What did you THINK my major was?
[2] Cool ill pick some up.
[1] being annoying π
[2] c u soon
[1] I wish thatβd be way more fun
[2] π
[1] fuuuuuuuuuuuuck what am I supposed to do when I graduate?
[1] get a job and contribute to society
[2] should i send the cute guy in my adv bus law class a carnation?
[1] but like how do u even do that??
[2] idk does he seem like he'd put out?
[1] get a job. contribute. easy.
[2] omg this is NOT about whether heβd put out????
[1] but how does one βjobβ???
[2] so he won't put out?
[3] or wait is this like a feelings thing?
[1] u like. work? and do the stuff ur paid to do?
[2] itβs a feelings thing which is why u donβt understand
[1] ive never had to look for 1 before
[2] if u want to then do it
[3] if hes not into it whatever fuck him
[4] except not since he wont put out
[1] talk to the career center
[2] like their ENTIRE JOB is helping students find jobs so
[3] and idk i might???
4] idk if it would make things weird if heβs like, NOT interested
[1] uuuuuuuuuuuugh
[2] just do it
[3] if hes a douche about it ill curse him
[1] u canβt just curse ppl, naveen
[1] can too
[2] its like a thing i can do
[1] but u SHOULDNβT
[2] god thatβs why no one likes u u know
[3] bc u curse TOTALLY INNOCENT PPL indiscriminately
[1] no ones innocent thats dumb
[2] and people π me
[3] im ducking adorable
[4] fucking
[1] uh huh
[2] go with me to the carnation stand and iβll go with u to the career center
[1] deal
[2] idk why ur freaking
[1] i want πππππππ
[1] aaaaaaand this is my problem how?
[1] πππππππ
[2]πππππππ
[3] πππππππ
[1] omg
[2] y canβt u just be normal???????
[3] fine lets get pizza
[1] yesssss
[2] hows it going with flower boy?
[1] good actually???
[2] i mean, he hasnβt dumped me for his childhood bff yet so
[3] this is progress
[1] so i wont have to trap him in a castle to make him love u? π
[1] omg
[2] NO
[3] in fact pretend u donβt know im dating and just forget he exists
[1] toooo laaaaaaate
[2] lucky u im fresh out of castles
[1] ugh ur the worst
[2] meet u at the 4f in 10
[1] 2
[2] more
[3] months
[1]
[1] ok but like
[2] hear me out
[3] COOKIES
[4] rn
[5] w milk
[1] Do we have to make the cookies or do u have cookies?
[2] cause 1 of those is better than the other
[1] breadcrumbs has the cookies
[1] way better
[2] i guess i can nap later
[1] c u in 15
[1] r u doing like a grad party?
[1] idk?
[2] i wasnβt really planning on it
[3] r u?
[1] thinkin on it
[2] I got the house and all
[3] we could split it
[1] sure
[2] might as well right?
[3] itβll be a last hurrah or something before i leave
[1] yeah plus no noise complaints when ur in the ducking woods
[2] and ugh dont remind me
[3] asshole moving back to cheeseville
[1] actually NOT mn but ok
[2] admit it uβll miss me
[1] where then?
[2] ill have to break in a new person
[3] that sounds like work π’π’π’π’
[1] ny for a year
[2] thatβs so sad for u
[3] wait
[4] not u
[5] for the poor sucker u have to break in
[1] oh that sounds cool
[2] rude
[3] u π me
[4] try not to cry
[1] nope i do not π u
[2] and iβll throw myself a party when ur literally on the other side of the country from me
[1] uh u totally do
[2] its little embarassing how much u π me
[1] nope
[2] not even a LITTLE true
[3] but u can admit how much uβll miss me
[1] ive got talia im good
[2] but u can come visit me or w/e
[3] and i can visit u
[1] well iβll probably be back to visit jack so I GUESS i can c u when iβm here
[2] and yeah u can always come to nyc
[1] who?
[2] i havent gone yet so might as well
[1] my bf the one u wanted to lock in a castle
[2] and u should
[3] nyc is cool
[1] oh yeah πΌ
[2] and it was more an offer. Like to help
[3] anywheres prolly cooler than here
[1] i donβt need help ty
[2] i mean, itβs LOUD???? and like, TONS of ppl
[3] but uβll fit right in with the freaks everywhere
[1] friends help friends capture cuties and lock them up in castles
[2] its a thing
[3] i fit in everywhere cause im amazing
[4] plus no creepy ducking portal
[1] um no i donβt think thatβs a thing?????
[2] uhhhhh that portal is creepy +1
[3] like, itβs just THERE????????????
[4] and ppl can just. go through it???
[5] like. WHY?
[1] its kinda our thing
[2] ITS THE WORST!!!!
[3] id ask my stupid cousin
[4] but not like they have cell service or whatever
[1] ok but itβs REALLY not
[2] yeahβ¦β¦β¦β¦β¦β¦.
[3] iβm like, totally good on this side of the portal
[4] dude
[5] we should totally toss paper airplane messages through it
[1] it is
[2] we tried stuff with shantiβs string
[3] its unbreakable?
[4] but nothing
[5] idk cant even get back at the people who opened the stupid thing
[6] π‘π‘π‘π‘π‘π‘
[1] itβs not
[2] yeahhhh that sucks
[3] like, i hope those ppl who went through are okay??
[4] idk that they WOULDNβT BE since like
[5] didnβt FIONA open it? and she was like, super nice???
[1] is 2
[2] yeah if leelaβs dead ill be pissed
[3] nice people are liars. always
[1] totally isnβt omg y r u such a creeper sometimes??
[2] i donβt think sheβs dead
[3] maybe sheβs a wolf now and like
[4] running through the homelands
[5] and WOW hi iβm a nice person and i am not a liar????
[1] Β―\_(γ)_/Β―
[2] i dont think so either
[3] still mad at her though her talemates werent even cool
[4] LOL ur an asshole
[5] but like its a good thing
[1] i h8 u
[2] uhhh sam is her talemate and he is totally cool
[3] but like, he didnβt go through the portal so
[4] and wow RUDE?
[1] πππππ
[2] yeah so he doesnt count
[3] screw the other ones
[4] nice people are usually like serial killers
[5] so u probably dont have a bunch of bodies under the floorboards
[1] um excuse u how do you know i donβt?
[2] (i totally donβt)
[3] anyway, y joint party
[1] id help hide them
[2] cause itd be weird to invite u 2 mine i u werent having one
[1] that is like
[2] the nicest and MOST DISTURBING THING uβve ever said to me
[3] i mean, i wouldnβt care????
[1] welcome!
[2] u already said yes no take backs
[1] fine just tell me when/time and iβll invite my friends
[2] which
[3] actually
[4] WHY ARE ALL MY FRIENDS UR FRIENDS TOO?
[1] cause im cool
[2] duh
[1] ugh WHATEVER
[2] iβm still prettier
[1] awww
[2] its cute how delusional you are
[3] anyway ill send u details
[1] iβm not delusional
[2] kk
[1] r u going to come by and say bye?
[2] bc iβm not going to go look for u
[1] idk im mad at u
[1] omg NOW what did i do?
[1] ur leaving me
[2] ass
[1] ok
[2] 1 u knew that
[3] 2 like uβll ACTUALLY let me forget you
[4] 3 ur coming to visit in like, two months
[1] IM ALLOWED TO BE MAD
[2] but yeah im coming over
[3] talia made food
[1] ok ok u can be mad
[2] and good
[3] talia can come if she wants
[4] jack is taking me to the airport in the morning, so heβs here too but heβll totally leave if you want me all to urself~
[1] πΌ can stay
[2] heβs not as annoying as he could be
[1] r u ever going to stop calling him πΌ?
[2] asking for a friend
[1] is πΌ the friend?
[1] no iβm the friend
[2] he thinks itβs cute
[1] ur π° when i txt him
[1] wait
[2] y r u texting my bf???
[1] cause were running away together
[2] or robbing a bank
[3] maybe both, idk havent planned that far
[1] nvm i donβt wanna know
[2] how long before u think uβll get over here?
[1] idk like 30 min?
[2] you better have pants on
[1] thatβs y i was asking
[2] π
[1] if u 2 are naked i will curse u
[1] πππ
[2] u wouldnβt tho
[3] u looooooooove me
[1] i will curse u and ur πΌ
[1] no u wonβt
[2] uβd feel bad
[3] bc u have feelings~
[1] ew liar
[2] im a regal ice queen
[1] except the ice thawed when u met me
[1] wait did u suddenly become a girl?
[2] cause thats the only way thatll happen
[1] just admit it
[2] iβm leaving so if u donβt do it nowβ¦
[1] arnt u supposed to be banging πΌ b4 i show up?
[1] itβs fine i know the truth
[1] c u l8er