InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "See Jane blog."

Hal knows the strongest thing in the universe is (willpower) wrote in doors,
@ 2012-09-29 07:22:00

Entry tags:

alfred pennyworth, prince charming

Locked to Iris R
[After he's gotten a chance to read over her file at length.]

Iris? I would like to talk to you about what you sent me.

(Post a new comment)

	Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-09-30 03:03 am UTC (link)
	I admit that I was beginning to wonder if I would hear from you again, Doctor. Though at least I know now that you are who you say. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-09-30 07:13 am UTC (link)
	I wanted to take the time to read over everything thoroughly before we spoke again. I admit, I was a little surprised to have the records sent to me. Did you want another pair of eyes on them? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-01 02:19 am UTC (link)
	And there was a substantial amount, I'm sure. I admit that it may have been more a warning on my part. I felt it only polite to let you know what sort of quicksand you were placing yourself in. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 02:09 am UTC (link)
	There was. [...] Luckily enough, I do know my way out of quicksand. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 02:17 am UTC (link)
	Avoid it in the first place? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 02:38 am UTC (link)
	Having someone to help pull you out works too. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 02:40 am UTC (link)
	And when it pulls both of you in, Doctor? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 03:26 am UTC (link)
	Only if I lose my footing. Comparitive metaphors aside, I think there are still things that can be done for you, Iris. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R

soundofwings
2012-10-02 03:42 am UTC (link)

I have heard those things. And as I am already aware that my normal regimen of medication often renders me quite emotionally monotone, I hope you'll forgive me if I don't necessarily wish to increase it quite yet. And while I've thought many times about returning to fulltime care, an option highly encouraged by the majority of my doctors, I am doing my best to prolong my time before that inevitability.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 03:49 am UTC (link)
	[...] I don't think either of those are the best option for you. Your normal medication needs to be cut in half, preferably one by one with a weaning process so you feel no ill effects. You do have a complicated history and diagnosis, but I don't believe that either requires your hospitalization. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 04:08 am UTC (link)
	[She stares at the words, honestly confused because they are the complete opposite of what she's always been told. Her handwriting is stilted as she tries to find the right thing to say.] I'm sorry, I think there must be some misunderstanding. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 04:20 am UTC (link)
	I fully believe that, Iris. I've reviewed your medications, your history, your diagnosis and I would be hard pressed to say anything other than what I just told you without seeing you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 04:23 am UTC (link)
	Russell. Or Morgenstern. That is what the name on the files should be. [She's still frowning. There has to be a mistake...] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 04:36 am UTC (link)
	Yes. With a date of birth of [he writes in her DOB], yes? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 04:44 am UTC (link)
	[Yes, that's the correct date...] Yes. [...] But you [She crosses that out.] There must be some mistake. That cannot be your true diagnosis, if you have actually reviewed my files. ~~I don't know what they say exactly, but~~ (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 05:10 am UTC (link)
	It is not a diagnosis, but an alteration to your current plan of care. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 03:36 pm UTC (link)
	Surely there are notes in there that indicate a return to [...] how I am without the medication, though? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 08:18 pm UTC (link)
	Yes. I believe medication can benefit you, but it's my opinion that you're on too much of it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 08:21 pm UTC (link)
	[Another very long pause. She's having difficulty with this, believing him.] That isn't a popular opinion. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 08:22 pm UTC (link)
	It may not be, but I'd be lying if I said differently. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 08:24 pm UTC (link)
	[It's close to an hour before she replies again.] What I'm doing now isn't working. [The handwriting is shaky, like it took a lot of effort for her to write that.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-02 08:28 pm UTC (link)
	Iris. [...] If you believe your current plan is working for you, I won't say anymore, but if that's how you feel, you have the right to change what you think isn't working. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R

soundofwings
2012-10-02 08:39 pm UTC (link)

[Jittery letters.] It's not. I don't think. But there's never been another option. I know I'm never going to be like other people, but I can barely even deal with the world most of the time. Even with the things I'm taking, I get nervous and anxious. Some days I don't want to leave my room. Some days I don't want to leave my bed. I am wrong in very fundamental ways and I am aware that there's no way to fix that. But I stubbornly do not want to return to fulltime residential care just yet, even though that seems to be everyone's recommendation.

[...] I am sorry. I did not mean to say quite so much.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R

willpower
2012-10-02 08:51 pm UTC (link)

[A pause.] You don't need to apologize.

You do have significant issues, Im not going to belittle that, but I also believe that they are issues that can be treated and that you can cope with. They are not insurmountable. It won't be easy and it will take time, but I cannot look at your file and tell you that the only recommendation I can offer is full time care, or even part time.

[...] I may have a habit of listening.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-02 08:56 pm UTC (link)
	[She's never had a doctor say something so hopeful-sounding like that before. It's very tempting in its own way.] [...] Okay. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-04 01:57 pm UTC (link)
	[A slight pause.] This is all going off the information located in your file, but I thought you should know. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-04 02:00 pm UTC (link)
	Yes, thank you. But I mean okay. Alright. I [...] think I would like to talk to you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-04 02:18 pm UTC (link)
	All right. Do you have a preference towards morning, afternoon? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-04 02:20 pm UTC (link)
	I am certain that it is not hard to believe that my schedule tends to be quite empty. And I did see that you have standard office hours. I am able to come during those hours so that you do not have to make any changes to your own schedule. I am crazy no matter the time of day. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-04 06:36 pm UTC (link)
	~~I'll see what I can do about that.~~ How about Thursday, around 3? You'll be the last patient I take that day. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R soundofwings 2012-10-04 06:40 pm UTC (link)
	~~In case you decide you were wrong and need the extra time to escort me to the hospital?~~ I can do Thursday at 3. I'll see you then, Doctor Roman. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Locked: Iris R / Jack R willpower 2012-10-04 06:41 pm UTC (link)
	I'll see you then, Iris. (Reply to this) (Parent)