InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Great Scott!"

Yamada Kai [山田海] (the_nadeshiko) wrote in disappear_rpg,
@ 2010-09-05 18:19:00

Entry tags:

kai, kouki

WHO: Kai, Kouki.
WHAT: Hurt-comfort noodles.
WHERE: Noodle Alley.
WHEN: Very shortly after the news of S!Masami drops, but before any actual investigation begins.
WHY: Something isn't quite right. Also it would be weird if Kai never wanted to hang out with his boyfriend I guess.

Kai wasn't sure why he had suggested Noodle Alley in the first place. Rescuing Reizo (or was it Reizo who had rescued them? he had been unconscious for that part and details were hard to glean from people he always felt bad about even texting, like he was bothering them) from Paradise had ruined any appetite he'd had before going in, with the decapitation and bone splinters and blood everywhere.

And besides, he thought, the dead didn't need to fill their stomachs.

Still, there he was, sitting in a stall in the alley and waiting on Kouki. His phone was out on the counter in front of him, and he sat hunched over on his stool, chin in his hand, considering it with an unreadable-yet-heavy expression.

He didn't want ramen, but he did want to see Kouki. Desperately.

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the_nadeshiko
2010-09-04 11:33 pm UTC (link)

Kai perked up at Kouki's voice, turning to face the other boy.

"H-Hi, Yoshida-chan." A weak attempt at a smile wavered into place before melting away as quickly as it came.

He shivered softly, partly from the chill November rain, partly from the way his stomach quickened at "are you alright?" Pulling his coat tighter around himself, he nodded once, unconvincingly. "I'm fine. It's just cold, and I'm hungry."

Well, he'd told the truth if "hungry" stood for "terrified of going back to Paradise so soon." He had invited Kouki out almost immediately after discovering the news of the new Shadow. Rather than stay inside, hovering by his computer and worrying what news his teammates would bring next, he'd just jumped out of it at the start this time. If they would resent him for lack of involvement, oh well. He'd come back when he was ready. To emphasize this, his phone had been turned off after receiving Kouki's confirmation.

In truth, he wasn't sure what he was making such a big point of, but it felt good to be decisive, so long as he ignored the crawling feeling in his gut every time he thought of Paradise, or his teammates, or anything related.

When the chef came around, he ordered a bowl of shio ramen, feeling an iexplicable craving for salt and comfort food.

"It's really nice to see you again," he said, with only a hint of his usual warmth. He toyed with the idea of reaching over and covertly touching Kouki's ear or his hand, but his arms stayed locked at his sides, motionless as the phone now tucked in his pocket. "Sorry I wasn't around too much since the last time we hung out. I-I've been busy."

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kykyoshida
2010-09-07 06:01 pm UTC (link)

Kouki hovered just out reach of his partner, searching him over with eyes unused to whatever it was he was doing. He was particularly drawn to how pale and distraught Kai looked.

"Yeah, it's cold. I hate this time of year- it's so gross! Can't wait for spring to come, huh? Spring and ramen. Those will fix your problems!" The smile on Kouki's face plainly said that this was all of the solution he thought Kai needed to get better.

Alongside the other boy, he ordered miso ramen from the chef, still obviously cheerful.

"It's really nice, Kai-sama! I really really missed you!" Any stiffness or formality went flying over his head with no evidence that he even began to notice. "Busy with important stuff, I bet! Kai-sama's a good guy. You've gotta be doing good things."

He leaned over and gave an extremely overextended hug to Kai, leaving himself hanging off of him- between seats, precariously, smiling like a maniac. "Could it be that you're working on a secret project? Or maybe... hmmm."

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the_nadeshiko
2010-09-11 09:12 pm UTC (link)

"It was nothing," Kai said quickly to brush off any more speculation. "I just got really busy, and my parents wanted me to stay home a lot anyway with the craziness at school." The savory smell of pork slices assaulted his nose, and his stomach did a flip. "...And I got a little sick, too." Rambling was usually a comfort for him, but every word that fell off of his tongue was rushed and heavy, like he was using them to build a wall between them both.

Kai-sama's a good guy. He wanted to be touched at Kouki's belief in him, but it only made him feel lower. Kouki had no idea what Kai had just come from, what he'd let survival instinct turn him into. He wouldn't say the same thing if he'd been there.

Kai placed his elbow on the counter and leaned on it, looking in Kouki's general direction but not at him. "I heard about the idol contest. Is Mara-chan too bummed out that she didn't win? I don't get it, she was better-dressed than Goto-kun, and did more for the school, too." Frankly, Kai had put much more effort into one outfit than the other, for obvious (even if he didn't realize them at the time) reasons. Beneath the gloom of his current situation, he could always find room to be annoyed that his best work didn't receive proper recognition.

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kykyoshida
2010-09-16 04:34 am UTC (link)

"Awww, you got sick? Kai-sama, you have to stay healthy and not catch colds!" Kouki's brow knitted over a comically pouting face as he looked up into Kai's vaguely morose one.

"I mean, it's good that you stayed away from the school. It's cursed." This was said much more seriously, and punctuated by Kouki releasing the other boy from the hug and backing up. Though it seemed at first that it was because of his shifting emotions, it transpired that his ramen was approaching. Though it was set in front of him, he ignored it.

"And I don't mean that like a joke or anything. It's not just... me being KY. The school's definitely cursed. Way too many bad things keep happening, like the deaths and the glitter and..." The unspoken look in his eyes read I don't want anything bad to happen to you.

Yet another change in outward mood manifested. The small boy became irritable and pouting once more, his previous concern washed away completely. "It's sooooo dumb! Mara-chan gave her all for fighting evil and supporting Nanakamado, not like that stupid catboy who was probably working for the stupid Apocalulzopus!" Kouki began to angrily eat his ramen.

"And Mara-chan was prettier! Her dress was 100% gorgeous Kai-sama handiwork, not just some shorts and cat ears. Goto-kun showed way too much leg, too..."

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the_nadeshiko
2010-09-16 11:30 pm UTC (link)

...Kouki's pouting face was adorable, and for a brief moment distracted Kai with tempting thoughts of kissing it. Then his ramen arrived, and with it the reality that kissing another boy in public would only compound his issues.

That, and Kouki's sudden break from absurdity to become serious. It startled Kai, and he looked over in time to catch Kouki's imploring gaze that simultaneously touched him and made him want to cry. His face softened, but Kai quickly turned back and split his chopsticks, eating fervently to avoid having to respond for the moment.

When he finally came up for air, he set them down on the counter with an air of finality. The bowl was half full, but he'd already eaten more than he wanted to, and his stomach turned at the sight and smell of what was left.

"You have no idea how right you are," he muttered in a voice much graver than anyone would've expected to hear coming from him.

He offered his usual encouragements - Mara-chan was way better, Goto-kun's legs were skinny and pasty, anyway - and soaked up the compliment of calling his work "gorgeous," but then his talk petered out. There was no encouraging ramble, only an empty feeling that spread further with every passing moment.

Kai put his head in his hands.

"S-Sorry. ...I'm feeling worse than I thought. I shouldn't have invited you out like this."

He wanted to tell so badly the reason he was really sick; that he was sick with himself and the situation and even the ringing of his cell phone. That he was scared all the time, and the only person he could tell wasn't allowed to know why. The knowledge of his predicament stormed inside of him, until it rose in his throat and his eyes as frustrated tears that threatened to spill over.

"Sorry... I'm being so weird." He tried to smile again, but it was strained and disconcerting. "I-I thought that was your job." It was meant to be teasing; he didn't realize that any subtle cruelty until after he'd said it.

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