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Sonozaki Renju [園崎蓮珠] ([info]lotus_beyond) wrote in [info]disappear_rpg,
@ 2010-07-10 21:52:00

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Entry tags:kozue, renju

WHO: Renju, Kozue.
WHAT: Social fail, hopefuly segueing into slightly less social fail.
WHERE: Via phone, later in person... somewhere.
WHEN: Pre-investigation.
WHY: Renju is working on this "friendship" thing.


It was a Friday afternoon, a couple of hours after school had finished for the day, and rather than work on her homework (she'd already finished most of it; old habits died hard, and that was one she didn't particularly care to let go of), Renju was regarding her old brick of a phone with the sort of look she normally reserved for particularly irritating members of the investigation team. She'd never actually used it to call anyone but family (and summon her Persona, but that was besides the point), and even those conversations tended to be short and succinct. After all, she had no social life, so what would she ever need to call anyone for?

But she had gotten it into her head to work on this failing, if failing it really was, and Kozue seemed like a natural starting point, given their general rapport. (She had, of course, no ulterior motives in this. None whatsoever.) The problem, as it turned out, was that she was coming to realize that she really had no idea how to even begin going about this. It was a frustrating feeling, having no idea about something she wanted to do, and one she was somewhat unaccustomed to--but then again, it was something she was going to have to get used to.

Finally, frustration gave way to a general feeling of "to hell with it", and she dialed Kozue's number. She'd be damned if she was going to be foiled by a simple phone call.


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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-11 02:49 am UTC (link)
Kozue was on her way back from tennis practice—in fact, she was on the front steps of the dorm when her phone rang, and she dug into her bag, fishing around until it was in her hand.

"Hello?" She asked, flipping it open and pressing it to her cheek. She hadn't bothered to check the caller ID; tired from practice, distracted for other reasons, she had simply neglected it.

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-11 03:18 am UTC (link)
"Kondo-san? This is Sonozaki."

The back of Renju's heel beat out a steady rhythm against the edge of her mattress, another habit she hadn't gotten rid of but one that might be healthier to. Still, for now, it provided a channel for her anxiety so it didn't leak through to the actual conversation. At any rate, never one for small talk, she pressed on.

"Are you available? I would like to... er."

And it occurred to her, as her mind suddenly decided to blank, that perhaps she should have prepared a little better for this.

Where would they even go, anyway? Most of Renju's gradually-increasing-in-frequency trips outside the Nanakamado campus involved solitary pursuits, mostly related to books, and she had some inkling that Kozue might not appreciate that (though maybe her gift indicated otherwise? One didn't find a translation of Prometheus Bound at the local newsstand). Dinner was theoretically an option, but she still didn't really see food as a reason for a social encounter, and anyway, given the last time they'd eaten together, would that be okay or would it seem too much like a request for a date? And other options were entirely escaping her for the moment.

"... um... something... do something..." It was hard to resist the temptation to facepalm. How stunningly eloquent.

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-11 04:04 am UTC (link)
That was a voice she hadn't expected to hear. Renju didn't reach out to others, so much, not that Kozue had noticed. Kozue hesitated a moment, until she realized that she was sitting on the phone and not saying a thing—and she then spoke quickly, to make up for it. She'd heard the pause and the confusion in Renju's voice and, damn it, she didn't want to make that worse by seeming to be that person on the other end of the phone who was covering the mouthpiece and laughing hysterically.

So, she came back with, "I'd love that." And that was far too enthusiastic. She qualified, fumbling to get the dormitory door open and keep on walking. "To do something. It sounds like fun."

At the back of her head, she had an inkling that something was making Renju nervous and stuttery, aside from the upperclassman's general antisocial tendencies, ...something which saying I'd love that to was probably entirely the wrong choice. Or. She headed for the stairs, and decided to just keep talking. "What would you like to do? I'm free now, I just finished tennis practice."

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-12 01:10 am UTC (link)
If it were anyone else, Renju would have had the irritating sensation of being humored, and even now that flared up briefly before calming; surely Kozue at least would be sincere, she hoped. At any rate, the fact that she hadn't been entirely shot down for that little bit of embarrassment was somewhat reassuring. She resolved once again, nevertheless, to prepare better next time.

As she considered Kozue's question, for a few moments, pride warred with practicality; eventually, when she responded, practicality won out. "I've never-- I'm not completely certain what people do during outings of this sort. Do you have any suggestions?" And just then, for a brief, unsettling, despair-inducing moment, she felt like Tom.

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-12 01:30 am UTC (link)
This, at least, was something that Kozue could step in on. She had the answer to 'what should we do today'—"We could go shopping. Just, you know, it's a decent place to hang out."

And, though she would not say it, she was getting a little sick of seeing Renju in her school uniform or in the same few sweaters and slightly frumpy skirts. The other girl's wardrobe could stand for updating; Kozue could, without even trying, think of several styles that would flatter her. It wouldn't be hard to sway Renju into trying on clothes, if Kozue herself started it. And from there to buying, it was another easy step. "We could grab a bite to eat at the mall, too." She paused, coming to the landing of the stairs. "Are you in the dorms, now? I could drop by and pick you up."

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-12 01:43 am UTC (link)
"Shopping?"

Well, that seemed... It was in line with one of her ideas, at any rate, so she'd been somewhat on track? Though there was a slight potential problem, if she was to be perfectly honest, and it would be best to mention that up front, she figured. No sense in saving unpleasant surprises for later. "I don't have enough to buy very much, but I would still be willing to come along." She did a bit of mental math; she still had a bit saved from her brief stint at Wisteria Fields, and her aunt had sent her a little at the beginning of the month, but that she was trying to conserve, and... well, maybe she could spend a little?

"I'm in my room right now. Would meeting at the entrance be more convenient?"

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-13 01:15 am UTC (link)
"Sure. I'll meet you at the entrance." Kozue was already turning on her heels, heading back for the front of the dorms. She'd just have to put off changing out of her tennis uniform until they were out. She could buy something cute and change into it at the store. "See you in a few?"

She was already thinking of how, exactly, she could convince Renju that she didn't need to pay for all of her own clothing. A gift? But no, she'd just bought something for Renju. It was ... well, aside from trying to impress each other for a specific set of circumstances, people didn't really do that, so much.

Within a few minutes, she was waiting at the entrance to the dorms, leaning against the door frame and idly messing with the charm on her phone.

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-16 02:00 am UTC (link)
That effectively ended the conversation for Renju and, her heartrate up a tick, she started flicking through the limited selection of items in her closet, vaguely aware that her uniform was not entirely appropriate for a meeting outside of school hours.

Of course, what she came up with wasn't much better, but she wasn't really aiming for "better" so much as "different". The weather had gotten cooler lately, so a permutation of her usual cardigan-long skirt-long socks combination would be comfortable, at least. The colors were subdued, more suited for winter than autumn (much like the rest of her wardrobe), but it had always worked well enough for her that she didn't take particular notice of it.

Her pace getting to the meeting point was a bit quicker than usual, and her arrival wasn't far behind Kozue's; still, her kouhai had arrived ahead of her, so she gave a small, perfunctory bow. "I'm sorry if I kept you waiting, Kondo-san."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-16 02:50 am UTC (link)
Kozue turned around, smiling, and smiling somewhat fondly upon seeing Renju's outfit. Just as predicted. Frumpy cardigan and kind of cute socks. Maybe if they could shorten the skirt and lengthen the socks even more? That was a good look; it was a good look even on short girls, something Kozue knew firsthand.

"No, I wasn't waiting long." And it hadn't been, at least, not particularly long in the grand scheme of waiting for girls to get dressed. "Ready to go?" She was already pushing up from the wall where she had been leaning, and dropping her phone back into her bag. As she did so, her stomach rumbled, reminding her that she hadn't eaten since lunch; and that she'd just done Tennis Practice, as non-demanding as the Kondo version of Tennis Practice was. "I was thinking, we could grab a bite to eat, too. Are you hungry at all?"

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-17 02:50 am UTC (link)
Renju had decided against an early dinner that evening, given that her only easy options were cheap curry rice or ramen until the cafeteria opened, and given what her Shadow had left in her room, if she never ate ramen again it'd be too soon. She recalled that her lunch had been light, so not waiting till they returned from this trip might be wise.

"A little." She nodded, trying to keep her eyes on Kozue's face rather than her tennis outfit. It brought back memories of watching that practice with Suzume and Kanaye--ah, that particular thought was enough to take her mind off that topic. Something to keep in mind for such moments in the future. "I would not object to a meal."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-17 03:30 am UTC (link)
Kozue shifted from foot to foot, thinking, not watching Renju closely enough to catch anything amiss, or any staring-or-not-staring at her tennis uniform. "We could leave it for after shopping, then," she confirmed with a nod; she could always grab something to nibble on if she started starving or something. The nervous motion continued, even after she'd made that decision.

Even though Kozue wouldn't admit to it being a nervous motion, at all, it was. If pressed, she'd say (and she'd even tell herself) it was because she was eager to be gone, excited to go shopping, tired of school and being stuck in the dorms and looking for something fun as a pre-weekend kickoff.

Just eagerness to go. Definitely. "So, ready?"

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-17 03:50 am UTC (link)
Another nod. There was very little Renju had needed to get together, and for once she was actually traveling without the bag that seemed to accompany her everywhere on campus and off (with the usual exception of Paradise). Her slim wallet and its meager contents were tucked unobtrusively away in a pocket, and that was that.

As with Kozue, she didn't pick up on anything particularly odd with Kozue, too distracted by her own thoughts to notice the sudden emergence of a nervous tic. "I'm ready. We're going to Subako, I assume?"

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-17 04:10 am UTC (link)
"Yeah, I was thinking that—we could head to one of the restaurants when we get hungry, and, until then? Shopping." The last word was almost an exclamation—definitely an enthusiastic declaration, if nothing else. She started for the door, glancing back once she had taken a few steps to make sure that Renju was following. It was instinct. It wasn't as though she actually expected Sonozaki to vanish, or start cackling and run away, or something else equally bizarre.

Because Renju was, you know, something rather like her friend.

[And then, they traveled to the store...]

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SHOPPING AT SUBAKO
[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-17 04:18 am UTC (link)
Once inside the Subako, Kozue made a beeline for the little, exclusive designer islands in the young women's section. Even though the store was, at some points, maze-like, and the escalators easy to lose track of as you ascended upwards, upwards, and further upwards, she found the right route quickly and flawlessly. Kozue had the most important locations here memorized.

It was really only once they got to the clothing section that Kozue lost her focus. In fact, she even lost her sentence, trailing off in the middle of conversation to pluck at a sweater hanging from one of the racks and murmur appreciatively. It was cashmere—and a nice color. Maybe it was something that could be integrated into Renju's wardrobe to make her feel comfortable, but also start transforming her from fashion disaster to fashion civilian? (Kozue was not sure how much further effort would be required to make that second jump up to fashion hero. But that wasn't the goal today.)

"What do you think about this color, senpai?"

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Re: SHOPPING AT SUBAKO
[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-17 04:32 am UTC (link)
Renju was utterly bewildered as she drifted along in Kozue's wake. She'd been to Subako maybe once before, and that just on a short trip to pick up a book she'd ordered there, but that wasn't what had her so stunned--that prize went to Kozue's heretofore unexhibited navigational skills. Up and up they went, passing by a dizzying array of products, any one area of which seemed like it would do for their purposes.

It became increasingly clear that Kozue had a particular destination in mind, and this was confirmed when they wandered into a thicket of skirts and sweaters and price tags with numbers she was more accustomed to seeing on electronics. She swallowed, feeling a little out of place amidst this environment, and almost jumped when Kozue suddenly asked her opinion on a particular item. It was a sweater that even she had to admit was tasteful, but giving an opinion on the color?

"It's, er. Nice." And it wasn't neon orange or lime green or anything ridiculous like that, which was all that really counted, right? It didn't seem much like Kozue's style, though, and she wasn't about to pay that much for a sweater when she had several perfectly serviceable ones in her closet

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-17 02:11 pm UTC (link)
She held the sweater in question up a bit higher and, after a moment, grabbed another one of a different color (this was a dark green, instead of the charcoal gray of the last one) and, to a casual observer, much the same construction. There were subtle differences between the two pieces as well; different placement of buttons, for one thing, and a slightly different seam on the shoulders. Kozue thought that this one might actually look even cuter on Renju. "Which one?" She asked, slightly raising one, and then the other.

And her attention span hit another brick wall. They had little asymmetrical dresses—were those on sale?—were they in her size?—what was Renju's size, anyway? No, Renju wouldn't look good in asymmetry, she needed something more classic. Not severe, but Kozue very much doubted that Renju would look at home in anything that was more than just a bit avant garde. So she filed away the asymmetrical dresses (in a bright, festive salmon pink with white trim, that was too adorable, really) and looked back at Renju. "Well, I'm going to try one. Do you want to try on the other? We can match!"

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-18 12:14 am UTC (link)
Before Renju could stumble through a noncommittal answer, Kozue's attention had (thankfully) been diverted briefly, giving her a moment to breathe before the next question, which a noncommittal answer was unlikely to suffice for.

"Ah..." The thought of matching did, somehow, appeal to some part of her she didn't quite know she had. And they were tasteful. And trying them on wouldn't obligate her to buy them. Right? And this was meant to be a social activity, so just bowing out would defeat the purpose of the whole exercise. It was just strange--she couldn't remember the last time she'd done this.

Finally, though, she nodded, a little hesitantly. "I'll try it."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-18 06:03 pm UTC (link)
Victory!

Kozue smiled, careful to show something that looked pleased, but not triumphant; that was too forceful, and it was just as likely to make Renju skitter away like... Well, Kozue realized she was comparing her upperclassman to a mouse, and that was a strange experience. So she tried to push the thought back, and hefted the two sweaters on her arm. "Great, let's find some other things! They don't have a limit on garments you can take back to try on, here," something Kozue knew from firsthand experience, "so we can just go nuts."

That was a perfect opportunity to divert and grab that dress for herself. She stepped over to the rack—it was only two racks down from the sweaters—and, after adding the dress to her growing collection of clothes, looked around. Something cute for Renju, something that'd fit the fusion of Renju comfort style and Fashionable that Kozue was going for... Hm...

"Ooh, what do you think?" She pointed towards a skirt, hanging on the far wall. It was very much the pleated, school-girl-invoking style, but it was made of denim. Denim was totally in, right?

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-19 01:35 am UTC (link)
More drifting along, and more looking like a fish out of water. "Going nuts" and "clothes" were not two concepts Renju tended to associate with each other, but her kouhai certainly seemed to know what she was doing. Better to follow along for the time being, then. If at any point she grew uncomfortable or tired of it enough to speak up, she had no doubt she could, but she wasn't near that point yet.

When it became clear that Kozue was addressing her again, Renju's head jerked up, and she looked at the item that was being pointed out for her approval. Denim? She grimaced involuntarily. She'd tried jeans once, and they had felt strangely thick and heavy compared to what she usually wore, not to mention uncomfortably coarse. She shook her head. "I don't think so. I don't like the material very much."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-20 12:14 am UTC (link)
"Oh. Hm. Okay. Let's find something else—skirts are really in this season, and I think it'd be a great look for you. Especially with those really bright colored tights, or high socks. It's totally in."

It was, in fact, in enough that Kozue had considered taking it up, and she usually stayed far into the pale colors, jewel tones and girlish things zone of What Was Fashionable. But now, her Grandmother wasn't looking over her shoulder and disapproving of every piece of clothing she saw, and now she had slightly more disposable income (in fact, way, way more if she ever sold off any of those old kimono).

She shook her head, coming back to the present, and pointed to another skirt, this one softer, probably cotton. Maybe even a bit stretchy. "What about that?"

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-20 01:23 am UTC (link)
Brightly colored tights? Renju blanched a bit. That was a little outside her comfort zone--but Kozue was off again, and Renju was left to catch up (metaphorically, since it didn't seem like she'd gone far). She followed Kozue's finger, and her reaction to the item being pointed out was significantly better than it had been to the last.

She took the material between her fingers and rubbed it thoughtfully. Not what she usually wore, but it was soft, looked comfortable, and wasn't entirely outside her personal sensibilities. Kozue did seem to have an eye for these things (at least, as far as Renju could tell, but anyone short of, say, Isao really could've fooled her on that). "I'd be willing to try it." She took it off the rack, unwilling to let Kozue end up stuck carrying everything.

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-20 02:15 am UTC (link)
Kozue grabbed something similar for herself, for good measure, and then she was off again, letting Renju follow after, partially thoughtless and partially because she wholly trusted that anyone would follow after her, especially when she was in a tennis skirt. Which raised, suddenly, that question, which almost stalled Kozue in her collection of might-buy-it garments. Almost.

Almost at random, she grabbed a few more shirts, making the effort to think Not About That, before looking over to Renju. "We're at least going to grab those long socks. I think they're like, on sale or something, here." She stopped and, with all the honesty and seriousness she could muster for the topic, appraised the girl in front of her. "And, senpai, you'd look really, really good with that long sock look."

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-20 02:27 am UTC (link)
Renju had been following along　steadily, focused more on Kozue than on the thicket of clothes around them. For all her awkwardness, this was... surprisingly nice, spending time out with a friend. She'd half-spaced out a little while after the last question, actually letting herself not think about school and Paradise and the investigation and everything else for the first time in longer than she'd like to think about.

Kozue's next comment was quite effective in breaking that calm.

As good at Renju could be at blocking off her emotions, it was very, very difficult for her to cover them up sometimes. Anytime said emotion involved blushing, it was even worse. Renju didn't quite so pink so much as red, and, fussing with her hair and sweater a bit in a poor attempt to hide her face, cursed herself for being so obvious about it. "O-oh. You think so?" Smooth as sandpaper.

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-20 03:01 am UTC (link)
Some people, Kozue reflected, did get that way about any comment. It was not unreasonable to believe that Renju, who was a bit of a shy, self-contained girl, might be one of those people.

Then again, there were also many, many people who got flustered when told they were cute by someone they liked.

It was a serious question, and one that she could pull at like a loose thread on the hem of a shirt, which one is Renju? As she started the process, the slow and leisurely process that it usually was, she just nodded and smiled like nothing was amiss at all. "I definitely think so."

She made her way over to the display which, it turned out, was having a sale on long socks, checked sizes, and scooped up several varieties, before turning to head towards the fitting rooms. This was the part Kozue liked best of all. Trying things on. Twirling and making stupid poses in the mirror. Getting unanimous approval on good things she wore (Kozue hardly ever shopped without at least a one-member peanut gallery unless she was in dire emotional straits indeed) and supportive feedback on the not-so-good things. Which maybe Renju would not be a genius at, but Kozue was here for her, right?

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-21 02:07 am UTC (link)
There was more than one reason why Renju looked a bit dazed as they approached the fitting room, none of which she was about to admit to if she could help it. If pressed--well, given how utterly terrible she was at hiding these things, it didn't really matter what she'd say, did it? If she hadn't already made the main reason obvious, which she was sure she had, given that Kozue was obviously not blind...

Still, no sense in dwelling on any of it till it inevitably came up again. She looked at the dressing room doors, down (somewhat skeptically) at the skirt she was holding, and back at the doors again. It wasn't as if she didn't know how this worked, but the thought of someone else appraising her appearance was strange, to put it lightly. Then again, it was Kozue, after all--it could be far worse.

Resolving to put her misgivings behind her for the time being, she looked one last time over the sweaters that Kozue was still holding. "I'll try the gray one."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-22 10:45 pm UTC (link)
Obligingly, Kozue passed the gray one over to Renju as they neared the fitting room doors, and followed it with a few pairs of the socks. "Okay. I'll try this one. Here, why don't we grab rooms next to each other?"

Without giving Renju much room to debate (although a reason for debating was quite beyond Kozue, just then), Kozue headed for her own dressing room, looking back over her shoulder once before she closed the door. And nodded, satisfied. Renju would not have looked so out of it, so caught-in-the-headlights, at being complimented, were it not for the fact that Renju found her attractive. In fact…

This, this was a revelation in the highest degree, and it hit Kozue while she was busy slipping out of her tennis blouse. Lots of people found her attractive. It was because she was attractive, and this was no secret. (She took a moment to look in the mirror, and turned around for good measure. Yes, she was still pretty, and her butt was still incredible. The front wasn't bad, but she had nothing but pride and love and confidence in regards to her backside. If she had been able to feel for herself as a person what she felt about her derriere, she would, perhaps, have never gone anywhere near Paradise.) Renju was, it was now quite proven, doubtlessly attracted to her. What was a little arresting was the possibility that Renju might actually like her. As a person. For who she was. Otherwise, why would the other girl spend so much time around her—since, unlike boys, there wasn't any clear path from take Kondo-chan shopping to take Kondo-chan to bed. There wasn't any reason to pretend to like Kozue as a person, no benefit in it, so…

It left her severely behind on the rest of her changing. By the time she had gotten into her sweater-and-skirt-and-socks combination, it was doubtless that Renju had managed it as well. And Kozue was usually a fast changer, too.

"Done?" She asked, hesitantly, opening her own fitting room door again and peeking out.

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-07-23 02:37 am UTC (link)
By the time Kozue had finished her introspection and changing, Renju was in front of the mirror, looking vaguely uncomfortable. The sweater was a good fit, and about as flattering as it could be to her lack of curves (though the color was less so, with Renju's fairly pale complexion), but she didn't seem to take notice of that, instead tugging fruitlessly at the hem of the shorter-than-she-was-accustomed-to skirt. Her socks were a little looser than they ought to be, resting around mid-calf instead of closer to the kneecaps as they were apparently intended to be worn. It was clear that the concept of zettai ryouiki was lost on her.

She fussed with them a bit, trying to find a comfortable spot for the tops of the socks to rest, before giving up and turning to Kozue... who, it seemed, had had much better luck with the look than she did. She swallowed hard and fruitlessly willed her blood to stop rushing to her face.

She quickly realized something that surprised her, though: it wasn't the outfit itself (though, she had to admit, that helped) that elicited that reaction. It was the act of actually allowing herself to look, instead of denying it and suppressing it and trying to hide it. There were... feelings involved that Renju was very much unaccustomed to letting herself feel; she still wasn't entirely comfortable with them, but this, too, was something she needed to stop hiding from. (Probably. This was less safe or sure a bet than the others.)

Finally, she managed to articulate something in the midst of all this. "... you look good, Kondo-san."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-07-26 03:04 am UTC (link)
Kozue beamed, pleased, and twirled back and forth a moment, the natural gesture of showing off the cuteness of her outfit. Which was, she had to admit, cute. She glanced up, taking a moment to appraise Renju's own look in turn. It was adorable.

Part of her attention was focused on the fashion, the points where the clothing was right, the points where the clothing could be better. Like the color. Like the socks. The shorter skirt was great, though, both in progress for Renju, and by itself. She looked, even, genuinely like a girl. "You should wear a shorter skirt more often. It's flattering on you," she offered, still smiling. "And thanks."

She took a few steps, trying to get a view of Renju from more than one angle; she was not circling the girl on purpose, precisely, but that was a bit of the effect that came across. "Let's try a smaller size of socks, did I give you the next size down, too?" If not, she knew she had at least three sizes in her dressing room. She raised her eyes from Renju's legs—only vaguely sensing, for a moment, that there was something taboo about staring at the other girl's legs, because there shouldn't have been at all—and came to stand at Renju's side.

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-08-04 01:00 am UTC (link)
The pink deepened, then gradually faded after a bit when it became clearer to Renju that Kozue was more focused on her clothes than on her. Still, it was the closest she'd ever gotten to a compliment on her looks (not saying much, granted, given that the next runner-up was "that skinny boy"), and so she'd take what she could get.

She tapped the tip of her toe against the floor a few times, then looked at the socks appraisingly, entirely unaware of where Kozue's own gaze was directed. "I believe so. These did seem a little too long. I had to push them down, but they still look strange." She took a closer look at Kozue's; trying to figure out the general look helped focus her mind and keep it away from... things she hadn't had much luck distracting herself from for more than a few minutes.

Were other people like this all the time? It would explain a lot.

"Are you supposed to wear them above the knee like that? I mean, I've seen it before, of course, but it seems like they'd get in the way."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-08-21 03:42 am UTC (link)
"You are," Kozue affirmed, looking down again; Renju had pushed them down? Well, that just wouldn't do at all. "They go over the knees, at least, and they don't get in the way any more than, like, wearing pants would." She leaned down slightly, still scrutinizing the socks. "Do you mind if I..."

She didn't really wait for confirmation, before reaching out to adjust the sock on the leg nearer to herself; if she couldn't make it sit right, she could at least show Renju how they should fit. "It's supposed to be this kind of coy, sexy look, you know?"

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-08-23 02:17 am UTC (link)
And trying to distract herself abruptly failed miserably.

Renju wasn't entirely sure what made her mind blank more--the idea of "coy and sexy" in relation to her, or... or... She shook her head yet again, growing increasingly annoyed with herself and what appeared to be entirely uncharacteristic wishful thinking. It was a friend adjusting another friend's clothes, that was all. It was almost a parental gesture (though the reason for it wasn't at all parental and--really, the more she thought about it, the worse the parallel was).

But that didn't change the first point at all. She fixed her gaze at a point on the ceiling and thought of Paradise. And school. Nice, safe thoughts. "That's not precisely what I'm looking for, I think."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-08-23 03:22 am UTC (link)
"What are you looking for, then?" Kozue straightened, looking back at herself and Renju in the mirror, face contemplative. Renju didn't seem the type for aggressive and sexy, nor for anything really Western-sexy. Now, lips furrowed, Kozue went back through her memory, trying to think of another style that Renju might be going for. What else would the other girl have intended? What else would have worked for her?

"I mean, I think that would suit you but you know yourself best," she continued—the words weren't particularly well thought-out, as Kozue's mind split its attentions between talking and wondering about Renju's fashion choices. She, too, glanced upwards, although thoughtfully, instead of with panic and embarrassment.

The thought barely occurred to her that Renju would not be going for some kind of sexy. Cute, after all, didn't seem to match the other girl's serious demeanor or what struck Kozue as a strong desire to be seen to have a serious demeanor. Kozue merely pegged Renju as someone who didn't know how to match desire to result when it came to fashion. So what was it that she desired?

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-08-26 01:17 am UTC (link)
"I'm not really... functional?"

Renju fiddled a bit more with the hem of her skirt (feeling air against her thighs in public was strange, and more than a little disconcerting), thankful for the slight diversion in topic. Granted, it was in relation to a question that she really had no idea how to answer. She saw girls like Kozue in showier clothes than her own, and it wasn't as if the effect was lost on her, but she'd simply never considered anything of the sort as a possibility for herself.

Nor did she still, and she was still conscious of the price tags on what she was wearing now. "I don't think there's anything wrong with my current wardrobe."

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[info]anthesphoria
2010-08-26 11:30 pm UTC (link)
"Does it make you happy?"

Renju's explanation had taken Kozue a little by surprise. Functional? Who worried about function? Clothing was meant for delight, for feeling pretty, for being pretty, for showing off how wealthy you were or could pretend to be. Function?

Did people actually think that way, or was Renju having her on? But Renju was such a serious person; Kozue had trouble imagining her making a joke like that, although if she was a joker, she had a great deadpan... No, Kozue was getting distracted.

That wasn't important, anyway. Being happy? And having things that made you happy? That was. So she creased her brow slightly, chased away the circuitous, distracting thoughts, and looked back at Renju.

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[info]lotus_beyond
2010-08-27 01:35 am UTC (link)
"Happy? It's just clothing." Renju took another glance at the mirror, as if to retest this theory, and came away dissatisfied. The figure looking back at her stood awkwardly, stiff and clearly ill at ease in the short skirt and long socks.

Even in her longer skirt, she expected that the result wouldn't change much. Different posture, perhaps, but the thought didn't exactly put a smile on her face, and she wasn't entirely certain how it was supposed to do so.

"It's comfortable, I suppose." In more ways than one, when she thought about it. Most of it had been her mother's, and she'd grown up wearing it herself--not out of lack of money, to be sure (they hadn't been poor, though it was occasionally easy to forget that in a place like Nanakamado), but simply because it was convenient for all involved. New clothing was a stranger thought than she'd like to admit.

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